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[Feb. 13th, 2006|01:54 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  crushed | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | bringmethegorizon | ] |
todays probably the worst day of my life.
i really do hope my time runs out sooner.
my bestfriend died today.
what fun
rip kruk<3
yeah its a dog asshole.
and i love monet nichole gab jeff rachel and my sister
for being there for me.
i really need it
i honestly dont know what the fuck im going to do with myself.
im fucking gay. |
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[Jan. 1st, 2006|05:06 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  <-- for kate | ] |
my password takes me forever. im sorry cole, but im changing it
last night was a good time indeed, thanks to cole<3
im still grounded
and i miss kell.
& im hungover.
and i have to clean
that bitch.
& i miss kell. |
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| this is for the hearts still beating... |
[Nov. 29th, 2005|01:38 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | apathetic | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | zao-killingcupid | ] |
i was thinking that lately i think to much.
im slowly ruining myself;idontcare,yet.
and if all goes well,
Someday I'm going to push everyone too far and be alone forever.
I'm going to own a million cats and be cast out by society.
thats all. i suppose |
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| fuckfuck |
[Nov. 10th, 2005|08:55 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  cranky | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | bleeding through . haha kell, ilu | ] |
updating this is pointless, but i guess its the only thing to do. im grounded . its going to be 3 weeks on sunday. which is pretty cool. its not like i hate it. honestly. its the worst time of my life. i hate being contained. i cant to it. im an unstable person, and it shows alot, now more than ever actually. but wtf are you gonna do? matt camp told me i should quit smoking before i ruin my life like he ruined his. and before i push myself away from all of the people that truley care about me. but. i dk. i dont care about anything anymore. so i dont know what i want to do. ive been sober for a really long time now. and i dont mind it. but ive noticed it puts me in some of the worst moods. like. when i was sxe.i was either really happy. or really pissed off, there was no in between. and thats weird? i dfk. i havent seen my friends in a long time. well ive seen em , but i havent hung out with them. good thing i love kate and vj alot for picking me up from school the whole 2 days i had it<33 i cryed when kate got me. cause i was really happy,and it was completly unexpected and i love that. im a huge procrastinator. and i cant help it. my dad is as well. he keeps telling me hes going to do this and that and to get my cellphone back and to get me off groundation. and this is like every other day, and im loosing my patience. i dk. i dont even care anymore. im in a terrible mood all the time, and i cry every chance i get.its not me at all. 2 nights ago zim was really drunk and made me want to die. telling me how much he misses me and shit. thats pretty cool. cause im pretty sure if tori found out she'd be pissed at him forever. cause hes pretty much a hipocrit.but its not like he meant it. even though he told me the next day he did? but its all an act. idgaf.my arms are really sore. the other day ang asked me if i lifted ! ha. thats funny. i wish i did. i actually just flexed. im gay. i have no muscles. i think?i miss ang. and partyin with her. i actually miss partying with big groups of people. its fun that way sometimes.i guess it causes too much drama at times. but whatev. i made a date with ang to get drunk as hell when this groundation thing is over. it'll be a good time. maybe we can do another night at vjs with everyone plus ang. crotch rubbing style.<3ilu kate. but uhh. yeah. i really love gab. and shes been around recently. i realized how easy it was to call her and ask her to hang out. and its really convinent since we live in the same town and all and i love her to death. and ive gotten closer to cole. not like we werent aleady. " iloveyou, your my best friend. my favorite of the bunch. rah ha. i love youuu" yeah good times. i really miss kell and being fucking dumb with her. its my favorite. as soon as this bullshits over lets blow shit up. metiphoricly speaking. btw ; i have amazing spelling. i have to take a huge piss. bye. |
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| 69ing is cool. |
[Nov. 1st, 2005|07:46 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  content | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | incubus | ] |
me and kell are in deep shit.
house arrest is cool i guess.
i dont know what to think of myself anymore.
i pretty much serve no purpose anymore.
wtf am i here for?
i constantly ruin things and piss people off.
i dk.
im trying to do better in school. i guess?
i try and not get detention everyday.
but it doenst seem to happen
i have a double tomorrow. and its going to fucking suck.
ive got to do all this work i didnt do.
stay untill 4 30.
and walk all the fucking way home. which mind you , is rather far.
I guess i should start doing my math homework.
Its going to pile up on me.
i havent dont math homework in weeks.
i have no enthusiasm twards anything i do anymore.
ive lost patience for everything.
good thing i have amazing friends.
and VJ. <3 hes helped me through alot.
and i realized that today. i love my boyfriend. rah ha.
im done bitching .
oh and could someone please re-do my LJ? its annoying and ugly. |
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| dgjwg |
[Oct. 13th, 2005|01:24 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | crappy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | coldplay , the nigjigz | ] |
being grounded makes me think ayot. &
i hate how i think that i have nothing now just because hes gone.
but i just realized, that i have everything i could ever want.
i have thee most amazing people in my life right now,
that i honestly couldent ask for anything better.
& i just thought you guys should all know, i love yous.
lets get critter, and soon. |
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| Shes No Saint, But She'll Take You To Your Knees. |
[Oct. 13th, 2005|10:16 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  cold | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | anias, rachel style. | ] |
im sick, and its lame. i dont like missing school bc i hate making up the work. tomarrows friday, and i dont think im going to be allowed out , seeing as how im grounded for a month. so i guess no scene night for me. ive been sober alot. and its weird, but its not bad. i have fun either way. ive been drawing alot. i guess its a way to get shit out. i dfk. and i sware i try to have an enrty without mentioning him. but its real fucking hard to watch him be with her. and i hate bitching about it. i wish he was with ex oh brookie. honestly. & rocco lied to me ! wtf is that shit. hes all. NO i dont go out with HUUUUUUU. who said that? sure asshole. we all know brookiethebrookebrooke and him mate like beast. and go out. its cool. i need a new LJ.i need alot of new stuff actually. im sick of myself. i feel like im missing something. or im just not myself anymore. im not awlays happy anymore? and its really gay. like.. VJ even noticed. and im barely with him. and hes like. this is weird. hes like, your ALWAYS happy, whats with the shitty mood? and i honestly dont know, but i really dont like it. maybe me being grounded will do some good.i dont know. my nose is running, and its real cute. speaking of nose. i pierced mine last night, and i pretty much pissed myself off. so i took it out. and i pierced gabs for the 4th time last night. its sweet. but she cant keep it = gay. Sam wants me to pierce her septum , bc she saw kellies and thought it looked nice. soi gotta get on that. i just need smaller rings. i never thought id become some kind of buisness. oh well. aslong as assholes dont let shit get infected , im cool. but whatev. i just threw up. i hate myself. fuckthecheese.imisseveryone. |
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| reba mackintyre is a sex goddess |
[Oct. 10th, 2005|10:03 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  pessimistic | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | pissfart | ] |
uhh so it was another crazy weekend.
i dont even know where to start. honestly.
i dont remember much of last weekend or this one.
but i know i had alot of fun.
me and kell swam in waist deep sewage water. mmmm. doggy paddeling and all<3
we drank last weekend. ayot.
this weekend. we didnt.
me and kell were skitzen so bad. irish potatoe dance made us do it.
there were some crazy niggers in camden on a roof top staring us down.
so we ran into karls yard? and his dog found us? haha.
so we ran the rest way home at 2 am.
kate came home today.
<3
im real happy. we had a nice yiddle day. all sober and sheeit. havent had one of those in a while.
but its a good time. and bleh. im cold. and friday = scene night at jess's
so we're going all out.
and probably drinking untill we all decide to run topless through jess's house.. i mean, not like its been done before or w.e
but im real tired.
and i cant think for shit.
CAK wants to talk to me about something. and im scared. bc hes like. my brotha. and when hes got somehing he wants to talk about. it means buisness. and im gay
and i dont want to go to school tomarrow.
this weekend was a good time. except for seeing him. that was cool. honestly.
its not like i dont want to die everytime i see them together.
but im taking goots advice on this one.
fuck that shit.
fds maybe?
my legs are hot.
wildabeast. |
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| i hate myself. |
[Sep. 29th, 2005|05:37 pm] |
| [ | Tags | | | lagg | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | bitchy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | WE BE BURNIN EX OH STYLE | ] |
so everyone pretty much called that one. asshole
too bad shes a cunt rag. id set her face on fire.
im real tired. i had ISS yesterday. good thing it wasnt boring.
bright eyes is really annoying and depressing, sorry kell.
i miss kell and shole and kate and jess. this grounded shit isnt cool.
moms are whats cool.
kate got her neck pierced instead. it was mighty good.
she held my sausage fingers <3
i really hate myself. and i dont know what to do with my time anymore.
i cant wait untill friday. hope fully my mom lets me out. crittercrittercritter.
i miss summer, alot. and sneaking out at 3 and never comming home .
i miss comming home wasted at 6 a.m.
i miss sleeping out everynight. not remembering anything i did the night before.
good thing i live at kellies on the weekends. im getting extra messed up this weekend. because i choose too. and its fun for me.
i need to see gabba. its been a while.
i think tomarrows thursday or friday ? someone tell me. because i dont know.
and i have ayot of money for friday <3
we're getting like. 7 tens i hope everyone knows.
it'll be a good time. every weekend is.
i love my friends. theyre the best <3 and i swear id let someone shoot my toes off for them.
we went to the yake. to play in the park. and me and kellie jumped in.
then we all went back home and changed and went shwimming in the yake.
with yake monsters. they bite dude. so you know. i faught em off.
it was a good time. good thing the slide kicked our hineys.
chikup on a stick. |
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| d.s.s. |
[Sep. 23rd, 2005|03:14 pm] |
| [ | Tags | | | tagtagtagilovelagg. | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  crazy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | OLDOLDOLD underoath. when they made music worth listening to | ] |
fuck that fighting shit. we're chronies you dumb bitch.
my legs hurt.
i sprint the track twice a day with monet<3
Vj picked me an amber up from school today.
ams had gaygay cramps so we left.
we drove by catholic and i screamed in this red heads face asking for Gab DiGiacomo.
and he said he didnt know where she was. but if he found her, he'd give her my message.
" your a hairy dick with gay camel breath , dick dollar loven "
but im sure she didnt get it. red heads are nuts.. i love moody.
hes marrying rachel
tonight kates getting her wrist pierced.
<3
iloveher.
i want mine done again.
too bad my mom would rip my testies off me.again.
my ears are amazing.
r.i.p gabs.
her moms a stupid hooker. and i love chris. shes a good guy. but . shes gotta let gaba change her own shit.
rah rah. im tired. and i gotta call monizzle. and tell her that theres no starlight party for the freshman. bc . everyone bitched to much, so its off. fds.
btw.
id would be nice if everyone could stop asking me to homecomming and prom.im never going, thanks.
bye. |
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| |
[Sep. 19th, 2005|07:10 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  amused | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | alexisonfire | ] |
me kell cole & ams are cool now.
i havent talked to kate or jess to appologize yet.
but i def was thinking about the 6 days going strong thing.
and uhh. it was amazing
then cole called me and told me she had the pics up on LJ.
so i got real happy in my pants and all.
so uhh , i wanna do it again.
whos in? i know shole is<3. |
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| bleh |
[Sep. 19th, 2005|03:26 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | shitty | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | old coheed. | ] |
so i guess this is where i appogize to everyone for all of the recent bullshit they've had to put up with do to the fact that im a massive asshole , and i cant contain myself. im sorry to kellie for saying i was going to hit her. i really wasnt. im a terrible drunk. and an even more terrible friend for even saying that in any state of mind. im sorry to cole and ams because i said i hope they get picked up. i was only pissed bc yous left us for gays. but ams explained to me that yous were taking back streets. which i didnt understand bc we were right there. but . its cool. i should have assumed or something, my bad. im sorry to gab for pissing her off with all the drama , same to kate and jess. kate has a short fuse. and im pretty sure i know that. too bad i was drunk, & i honestly dont remember stealing jess's brothers gauges. but someone told me i did the next day. i promise ill give them back once i get the 4's from gab. btw ; shes a champ bc she had 2's in a bled like the great war all over. but anywho. it really sucks when you fuck up so much that every single one of your friends hates you and dont want to talk to you ever again or anything.so. w.e i fucked up again , and i admitt it. im sorry. |
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| assfart |
[Sep. 13th, 2005|03:04 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | quixotic | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | as i lay dying , new cd style<3 | ] |
i ran into a sign a few days ago. and i love it. because it looks like i was out fighting the great war. i got critterd all this weekend. i even passed out. moked. alot. with cole. and once with kell. i only ralphed once from all the critter. but. i think it was because of the horney goat weed. lmao gab & cole. i love stealing suits and whips. and all that other unessicary shit. so school started. thats gay. its alright.i dont have any classes with rachel angie or ams. but this niggas got one with COLE.<3. i skipped twice. aka i havent been to e.a.t yet.yesterday i skipped with rachel, and today i skipped with cole. i need to go tomarrow for sure though. i need a fucking locker. real bad. i hate carying my books like a faggotfuckfuckgayhole.i think kell should enroll again.or i should just go to highland with her.its not that bad i guess. speaking of highland. zim wants to come to ghs.i said go for it. but he wont. me and him are cool now. i just hate tori. and i hate that hes stupid enough to go back to her bullshit. i just wish summer wasnt over. but i dk. it was fun. i wish i had gone to the shore. aka ac more often with kell and cole. i set my thumb on fire at vjs. and its really gross looking now. me and rachel are cool now. no one ever appologized. she just caled me one day. i dfk. me her and jeff hung out yesterday. i missed jeff so much.<3. too bad he loves jessfuck. he got a tattoo and its slpendid. then zim randomly showed up at cvs. and talked to him for a pretty long time. and rachel got really pissed off. she loves moody.
i dk. me and cole are supposed to holla at ffa. and make out with faces. its going to be a good time. bc i lovelovelove them.?
but. anyway. i love shole.
kill ex for this: so you know your parents are cheap when they buy toasty tarts instead of poptarts. |
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| SUCKTWATGAY |
[Sep. 7th, 2005|01:39 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | cold | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Zao | ] |
my legs bleeding.
yeah.iloveblunksbed.
yeah so its pretty cool that on rachels birthday she picked a fucking fight with me and decided to tell me to never talk to me ever again and block me and all that cool shit. w.e shows how much of a friend she is if she doesnt want to work through things. ive been hanging with cole alot lately ,and i love it. <3 shes a good time, all the time. and shes good in the sack. the past 2 days me and cole have been with amber. 5 days of critter , goin strong. and im pretty sure we are tomarrow too. and i havent gotten caught yet. but my moms a gay,and shes all suspicious. bc i can spell and all? so its pretty cool that i miss gab alot. i havent seen her since saturday. and she has school tomarrow. and the hotel party pretty much isnt happening,. bc we never called for a room yet. nor got enough money.soo, we'll probably have it the week that school starts? good idea tra?i really hate warm alcohol. fuck that shit.so, im pretty much bored with zim. hes stupid and he only cares about ass and weed. gaygaygay. i hate how nichole doenst have the internet. and i barely talk to kate or kellie. its been like. 5 days. which isnt right man, ill tell ya. i dont feel good.i think me and nichole have to stop this horney goat weed shit. lol. gabs the best. that was a good time. btw. they made me throw up. my pelvis just popped. i love that. and i love sneezing. and i love being lied to, then finding out the truth.<3 and i hate tom. and how hes so forcefull, i almost hate getting with him bc im scared. he could so beat my ass. oaky so i hate getting with him. i think im bipolar, but its cool. shit happens. so yeah, im fucken tired. and im probably gonna go out. than tomarrow we're going to blunks & roccos to fuck up lives.
ihatemyself.
bye |
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| whatev. |
[Sep. 2nd, 2005|07:37 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | tired | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | mae | ] |
i had no idea it was september 2nd already.
the end of summers always depressing.
and im always a wreck bc i know i have to go back to school
and surround myself with a bunch of people i dont want to be around.
im dropping out when i can. and im going to school for
tattoos/piercings and shit i guess.
bc its the only thing i really want to / have a chance in doing.
rachels birthday is monday.
her partys tomarrow.
im getting her something amazing.
shes going to like it. or ill shove it in her hiney.
im grounded.
i was on the comp at 3 a.m. bad ass dude.
let me fucking tell you.
its a pointless groundation.
i cant sleep at night. so i come here.
i wasnt waking/bothering anyone.
whatev.
i was supposed to go out and get critterd.
with kell.
maybe bag.
cole doenst want to. : (
im pretty tired.
i just want to go out. its the last couple of days in summer,
and i dont want to spend them sitting in.
kell moves in tuesday.
its going to be magical.
im tired.
i cant stand zim anymore.
he says one thing and does another.
everyone says to let go.
but its pretty hard to let go of your bff.
i dk. he wants to hang tomarrow and talk about everything.
but its going to be all sad and shit. and i hate that.
i hate drama. im too passive. i just go with everything.
and if i go back to him, everyones probably going to be mad at me.
i dk. im stupid. an di know i shouldent.
but rah. last night was a good time.iloveatcowithkatecolejesskell<3
its amazing. & we might go sunday i hear?<333
btw; hotel party...no cunts.
im tired |
|
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| waffles are so good. |
[Aug. 27th, 2005|09:35 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | bored | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | the bood brothers | ] |
whoa, so last night = a crazy good time.
myself kate kell and cole attended Rocco's shindig.
me and kell started drinking as soon as we got there pretty much.
Cole was a wee behind. Beering it.
i dont want to finish this muffin im eating.
i finished most of the peachka.
thank god i saved kell that swig.
me and cole pretty much finished shauns captain.
cole stole his chicken finger.
we got some natty.
i drank about 4.
i was really drunk.
layed down. then threw up.
thanks kate for laying with me
and kell for cleaning my throw up , up with a water bottle.
gab called me. to inform me zim had sex with tori and cool shit.
so. drunken cool me. calls zim and makes him get me.
i go to zims. we fight all night. sleep.
wake up. fight some more. called GOOT<3&COLEYWOLEY
went home.met rachey.we argued the whole time she was here.
so i took her home.we fight all the time anymore.
im just sick and tired of her preching her sXe shit and her opinion on EVERYTHING.
i dk. i love her to death adn iwould fucking die for her. but i cant take it anymore.
shes convinced that me and zim have sex. jsut about along with everyone else.
but. wtf are they gonna think if im with him alot.? i dk.
i cant wait untill kell moves to Gloucester.
its going to be a good time.
cole and kell and kateboo all ze time.
i think.next time i drink. i wont drink alot.
because everytime i do. i over do it. but i didnt start drama this time.
so. im getting better.
cole kate and kell are supposed to call me in a little after this whole mall deal
but. its getting a tad latey.
and i have to go cunt school shopping tommorow.
i really hate it there.
and shopping.
fuckmynards and call me tommorow cole.
ps.bye. |
|
|
| rahrahrah |
[Aug. 21st, 2005|09:24 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | content | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | The Mars Volta ( faggot shirt kell) | ] |
i wonder if gab will comment this?
yeah, shes cool. faggotfuck.
but yeah, ive been sick. 103.3 fever style<3
so uh last night we ( gab rach cole kell kate jess sara)
went to the spongey park. had a good time.
drank. kate jess sara rach & bag left. cool.
so then we straightened our hair. i mean, come on. why not?
in a park? cool shits dude. cool shits.
we then proceeded to meet up with drunk kate.
Marcy calls me to tell me Peppers dead : (
i cry. we get to kates. we all keep drinking and stuff
chasers running low . good shit.
did i mention we had a ten of kassers.
not kAssers. faggot.
yeah. then Bri picked us up and took us to his new appartment.
still drinking. went to wawa. DAVID SHWARE<333 yeah cole.
ps. wawa has the best jams. me and cole are getten that shit on a cd.werd.
so then uhg yeah. we went back. & kell got her ass kicked by some pork,
we finish the volkda. im not even buzzed. it was gay.
me and cole stole all these condoms from bri.
i stole a mangar and cheeta lighter with kell.
we licked that shit. it was magical.
then uhh. yeahh me and cole didnt sleep.
we played with icecream cards pepper and salt.
then like. beat bri for his bed. and got about 2 hours of sleep.
then went to kates. then home.
went to bed till 4 something.
gab and rachel showed up in my room
i pierced gabs nose & wrist.
good times.
oh and kells letting me pierce her septum, hottie.
yeah well im gonnna go meet rachel.
& go out.
eatmefaggotfucks. |
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| |
[Aug. 14th, 2005|07:48 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | content | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Between The Buried And Me | ] |
im really tired. last night was fun.
except for uhh the while drama scene once again.
but yeah. ihad fun with cole untill everyone wanted to leave.
gay..
my brothers to over protective.
im hung over.
i didnt cry last night.
veej talks alot of shit about everyone.
i dont like making out with people when im drunk
its annoying and only causes drama.
i love talking to kellie.
its a good time.
she really needs to get her ass back here.
btw. shes comming tommmorow.
gabs probably going to wear her furry pants again.
i ahvent talked to rach or gab yet.
i called gabs house today. and joe doesnt know where she is?
skghskghkjfshg;lahsg.
chloe just told me to im this cunt and annoy her.
so im enjoying myself.
kay. uhh. i dk what im doing tonight?
i think ill make some eggs and go back to bed?
cunt. |
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|
| |
[Aug. 11th, 2005|02:15 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  hungry | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | bury your dead | ] |
bleh. ive been grounded. no comp style.
cops brought me and rach home at 4 am.
its cool i guess. but. yeah. nothing to
write about, i just sat on my fat ass all day
ate cerial and slept. my moms going to beat my
face in. i text people way to fucking much.
okay. so maybe today me and gab are going to the mall
so we can up our ears. then my parents can bitch at me for that
theyre already making me take out everything.
but whatev.
im talking to cole now<3333333333333
and we're going to the mall later.
jealous much fgts? |
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| stupidstupidstupid |
[Aug. 7th, 2005|04:39 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | crushed | ] |
i need a new layout. asap.
oh and. i really hate fighting with nichole
its really gay. i cant stand it.
and its over stupid shit too.
a fucking boy.
i seriously thought we were better friends
than that.
she doenst realize how much i fucking love her
and i was drunk. and when your drunk
your pretty much careless and do w.e
and.like..i dk. i dont break promises.
and she knows that. i have such a guilty consious
and it kills me. so i never break em.
and i did. and now i feel like shit.
nicholes so fucking mad at me. i just want
the both of us to put all this stupid shit behind us.
i feel like the biggest jerkass dickhole right now.
and i cant stand myself. i hate loosing a friend.
and i really dont want to. at all. cole.
pleaseeee calll me later so we can talk.
imisyou and i hate this. |
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