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slippery when schizophrenic
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[22 Feb 2015|05:06pm] |
Kind of.
You know the drill. Comment if you want to be added.
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[30 Dec 2005|06:03pm] |
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mood |
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 depressed |
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music |
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Angry Salad - How Does It Feel to Kill |
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I think it's time I cut myself off from my high school friends.
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[29 Dec 2005|07:42pm] |
I'm going to a party up in Foxboro tonight. If I don't return... well, who knows where I'll be. Hopefully this won't be one of those nights where I lose my cellphone and/or camera, because I don't know these people and will never see them again to get my stuff back. (For the record, they're friends of friends, and I am going with a group of my friends who know them, so it's not completely sketchy or anything.)
I'm doing really well with this whole "no drinking until my birthday" thing. As always.
And for the Rehobothians: Chartley's is so much cheaper than Gasbarro's in Seekonk. Just so you know.
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[29 Dec 2005|03:14am] |
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mood |
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 awake |
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music |
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Rufus Wainwright - Oh What a World |
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First off, happy birthday to ![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) gleebs, I would have IMed you but you're not online...
Second, I can't sleep. I've completely screwed up my sleeping schedule. Yay me! I was awake around... 10:30 this morning? I brought Nate to his mom's house, and then went shopping with my mom (rather unsuccessfully, I might add... the tasks were to get my car stereo installed and to buy new gym shoes. They were out of the parts for the installation and had to order them, and the only pair of shoes that I liked they didn't have my size). Got home from that around 2:30. Was asleep by 3, slept until around 5, when Amy called to come pick up her camera. She did that, then I went to the gym, got home from there around 7:45 or 8. Was asleep by 9. Woke up at 10:30. Talked to Christie online a bit, and then decided to get some reading done. My sister finished reading Memoirs of a Geisha while she was here, and so she gave it to me to read. So here I am, 3am, halfway done with the book. And not tired. Because I sleep random hours during the day.
I could write something worthwhile, but why would I do a thing like that? Maybe tomorrow, while I'm procrastinating on cleaning my room.
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[26 Dec 2005|02:27am] |
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mood |
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 crazy |
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music |
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Plain White T's - Lazy Day Afternoon |
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Nate's going to call in the morning and be like, "Why are you still sleeping?" and I won't know why, because I was exhausted and yet I can't sleep. Awesome.
So I was going to write Matthew an email. Until I remembered that impulsive late-night/early-morning emails to guys aren't things I should do (speaking from experience). Not to mention full of typing errors. So I should leave it until the morning (or whenever I wake up). But I hate that. So maybe I'll write up the email in notepad and see if it's still a good idea in the morning. That seems like the best idea.
Ummm... I had something else to say, but I don't remember what. I sure wish I could sleep. Or that I had Discovery Health at home. Right now I'm missing Medical Incredible: Crash Landing. Which I haven't yet seen. Yes I'm pathetic, but I love Discovery Health!
Oh, wait, I just wish cable was hooked up in my room. Scott said he was going to fix it on Wednesday. I'll have to remind him again tomorrow.
So I'm downloading Sufjan Stevens songs. Because Hal and Tim (from down the hall) recommend him. Anyone else have any opinion? Hal has good taste in music, Tim does that I know of... so we'll see.
Having five blankets on my bed is just a little too much. I feel like I'm sleeping under bricks. Maybe that's why I can't sleep. But it's coooold in the basement!
You all love my rambling entries when I'm really tired. You can pick them out so easily. I at least love it.
Hi, this should so be my new theme song. I dub it so!
I really need to sleep. Scott's home, you know it's time when...
Hahaha I just sent him an IM saying he needs to fix my cable. I don't think he knows my new screen name. I think he'll figure it out. But yeah, I love sending IMs to other people in the house, cause we're that damn lazy... or if I get out of bed all of a sudden I'll have more energy and then I'll never get to sleep!
Umm yeah you're all wondering why I didn't end this ages ago. Because... I like writing about absolutely nothing.
I was going to attempt sleep again, but then I remembered that I never wrote that trial run of Matthew's email. Which would've been fine if I hadn't remembered. But now I remember and I won't sleep until I either write it (and revise it fifty million times) or forget about it again. Hmm... which one's more likely to happen? Ha.
I'm tired. Good night.
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[26 Dec 2005|12:41am] |
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mood |
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 exhausted |
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music |
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That 70s Show |
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I switched my From Grimms to Disney class to pass/fail for next semester. Seeing as I'm only taking the class for fun, I don't need the pressure of getting a really good grade. As long as I pass. And I should.
Exhausted. Going to sleep after I finish this disc. In... three minutes. Woo! And then tomorrow: gym to work off all the food I ate the last two days, and then SEEING NATE! YAAAAY! And then cleaning my room a little. I cleaned it on Wednesday but you can't tell now. Haha.
Okay, disc is done. Good night.
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[25 Dec 2005|07:32pm] |
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mood |
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 a little tipsy |
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music |
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That 70s Show |
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( Christmas pictures )
And my mom made an entire bucket full of margaritas, I've had three (and two glasses of wine) and Jenna's coming over to help me finish the rest. Haha.
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[25 Dec 2005|11:23am] |
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mood |
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 tired |
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Gift list from last night (my aunts, uncles and grandpa) and this morning:
CDs:
At the Drive-In - Relationship of Command (Japanese bonus track edition apparently)
Beck - Guero
Dismemberment Plan - Emergency & I
Dream Theatre - Octavarium
The Killers - Hot Fuss
Plain White T's - All That We Needed
100 DVD-Rs
25 CD-Rs
car CD player (except I have to either find someone to install it or pay for it myself, but it plays mp3s AND has a remote for the people in the backseat... I'm taking bets on how long it'll take me to lose that one)
bike rack for my car (so I can bring my bike to school next semester, Jen!)
That 70s Show Season 3 on DVD (now I need season 2, the one with my favorite episode!)
lots of clothes (mainly pajamas, but also SIZE SIX!! blue corduroy pants, and some long sleeved shirts to wear under my work shirts, and socks and fishnets)
gift cards to: Target, CVS (so I can buy makeup, because my mom refused to pick it out for me), Dunkin Donuts, the gym, Starbucks (apparently my mom's under the impression that I'm as caffeine addicted as the rest of the family)
loooots of gum
a quilt that my mom made (pictures coming later)
also, a scarf and a hat that my mom knitted
8 really pretty wine glasses (to add to my drinkware collection)
B12 and iron vitamins (my brother's awesome like that)
2 cute purses
a wallet and a change purse
frame for my Nightmare Before Christmas soundtrack vinyl (it's a picture disc, I don't want to ruin it by actually playing it)
framed picture of me and my mom at the Red Sox this past May
Trivial Pursuit Pop Culture 2 (I already have the first edition, and it's really funny when Nate and I play against each other because he can't get the music questions and I can't get the movie questions so we just go on and on forever)
Harry Potter calendar
And 3.5 pounds from dinner last night. *grin*
There's other stuff I'm sure, but I am exhausted. I fell asleep at midnight; 12:30 Jewel comes running into my room and JUMPS ON MY HEAD while yowling. So I had to calm her down, and then I was wide awake. And then she fell asleep on my arm (as I was talking to Christie on the computer), which was awkward. So it took me forever to get to sleep, and then my sister woke me up grinding her coffee beans this morning. So I'm going to take a nap. After I finish ripping my new CDs to my computer.
And my sister got season 4 of the Gilmore Girls, so I have a pretty good feeling we're going to watch that later. Yaaay!
As for Jewel and Chester... Chester's trying to make friends with her. They've gotten as close as a foot away from them. Jewel's still making disturbing noises, but Chester's not afraid anymore (she really is just making noise). So maybe she'll realize soon that he's not out to hurt her. Maybe.
So, merry Christmas to all who celebrate it, and happy Yule to the Pagans, and happy Hannukah to all the Jews (I think that's just you, Alex) reading this. Anyone celebrating Kwanza? :P
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[24 Dec 2005|02:47pm] |
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mood |
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 meh |
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I had a dream this morning about Erik. It's been a while. But the dream coming wasn't surprising considering it's the holidays.
So I sent him a text message wishing him a nice Christmas. He replied with a polite "you too".
I don't know why I'm bothering to catalogue every tiny interaction with him. It's not like it'll ever amount to anything. But that's the way I am.
In other news, I need to stop falling in love with every. single. guy. I spend an amount of time with. It makes things too confusing! Not the least of whom is Hal, even though we've recently discussed relationships and how we've given up on them for the time being and just want to mess around and have fun. Messing around with him is absolutely OUT of the question because... well, let's just consider my history with him.
And then there are other guys. Like Matthew. And Tim. And... someone I won't name. But I think Christie has a pretty good idea.
But let's just face it, my weakness is that I fall in love with every guy I meet. I just wouldn't be me if that wasn't the case.
And my bill for next semester just came in the mail. For some reason I actually have to pay this semester. Hmm... something must be wrong here.
Okay, off to church, and then dinner at my grandfather's, and then cocktails at my cousins'. Have a nice Christmas Eve, everyone!
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[24 Dec 2005|07:46am] |
Okay, cat update: they've made a "compromise". Chester won't come out of the spare room (he sticks his head out into the hallway, but that's all), and Jewel won't come out of the basement except to hide under the Christmas tree among the presents. We've put another litter box in the spare room. At least this means that he won't eat Jewel's food.
What am I doing up this early? Especially since I was up until 3 watching Gilmore Girls? Oh, I'm just going to the gym. Yes, I am insane. But I ate a lot of food yesterday and plan to eat even more tonight (it's Wigilia, the holiest day of the year in Polish tradition) so... the gym is a necessity. And this is the only time to go.
That, and apparently the gym got whole new equipment with built-in TV screens (and a full cable selection!) for each individual. So I want to check that out. Considering I'm getting a membership for Christmas. I want to see if it's worth all the hoo-ha.
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[24 Dec 2005|02:09am] |
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music |
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Gilmore Girls |
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Calling all cat people who read my lj.
So, my sister's cat is here for the holidays (with her, of course). He's a very harmless cat, afraid of everything (after today's relocation, he spent a half hour cuddling with my sister in the spare room, and would barely transfer over to me when she went to change her pants... and I've met him before!).
The problem is my own cat. We've never had another cat while we've had her. She's been indoors her entire life. We brought her home from the pound when she was around 8 weeks old, so... she probably doesn't remember ever encountering another cat. We had a dog. A small cavalier that she loved to swipe her claws at.
So, we bring in Chester (Katie's cat) and Jewel freaks out. Not that she attacks him. That she hisses and yowls and runs downstairs and hides in my room. She was just laying on my bed (my room is her "safe space"), as she had been doing all day (we were watching Gilmore Girls together). But then, he was exploring the house, and he came down here and I guess wandered into my room... I was upstairs watching a movie with Katie, and we hear this wicked loud yowl... I came down to find Chester in the other room hiding underneath a tv stand, and Jewel in my room hiding underneath my bed.
My mom, after about an hour, came down and dragged Jewel out from under my bed and brought her upstairs. She proceeded to hiss at every thing that moved (including me!), even though Chester was nowhere in sight (he was still in the basement).
Now it's hours later, Chester's been asleep for at least two hours, and Jewel no longer hisses at me, but she was yowling for a while. At me, at my sweatshirt (I was holding Chester, so it smells like him), at her own reflection in the mirror. Yeah, I spent five minutes holding her in front of the mirror until she stopped making scared noises at it. Once I let her go... yep, back under the bed. For an hour. She wouldn't let me pet her or anything. She just came out and is laying down on top of the bed, but staring at the door. I'd just close the door entirely (it's only cracked open), but she needs to be able to get out, if she decides she needs to use the litter box.
So, my question is... how do I get her to not be so afraid of Chester? Really now. Just lock them in a room together? Because there is no way that Chester will do any harm to her. Or do I just... give her time and let her get over her shyness? Like a person? Haha. I DON'T KNOW. This is supposed to be a trial run to see if she can handle another cat! I want another cat!
Any ideas?
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[23 Dec 2005|02:37am] |
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mood |
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 annoyed |
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music |
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Gilmore Girls Season 2 |
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My computer is against me successfully burning this CD for Nate. The last of his Christmas presents.
I put it all together and burned it, made four copies (one for my own personal records, and two for other people), and... somehow the tracks got all messed up. One song showed up twice, one didn't come out at all, and the second half, the track order was all wrong! I have no idea how that happened. So I had to sit there and figure out where the songs were supposed to go (you know it's an art, right?), and I copied the tracklisting into notepad just in case. Started burning it again... and my computer shuts off!
Next, all my mp3s of the songs I need are going to disappear from my hard drive.
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[22 Dec 2005|01:24pm] |
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mood |
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 excited |
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music |
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Silverchair - Israel's Son |
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Nate's coming tomorrow! EEEE!!
Although my mom wants me to pick up a Christmas present for him from her. Huh. I know plenty of things I could get him, but... not many appropriate for her to give to him. Haha. So this will be interesting.
Still... Nate's coming! And he was only going to be here until the 26th, but now he's staying until the 2nd! YAY!
Although it doesn't feel like Christmas is three days away.
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[21 Dec 2005|11:02pm] |
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mood |
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 productive |
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music |
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Plain White T's - Your Fault |
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So the plan is this wallpaper with this border. So what if I found the wallpaper (not the border) in a book of baby room designs... old people have ugly taste. :P
We found someone to do the wallpapering, at the price of martinis and margaritas (after!). Now I just have to clean my room (it was clean until I came home and dumped all my stuff everywhere yesterday...), take down the posters, and figure out a date for them to do it. I want to have it done by my birthday, because I want to have a party for my birthday (as of yet unconfirmed by my mom).
I'm trying to make my room look more "adult-like", whatever that is. No more posters of movies and, um, mullets plastering my walls (I'll have a couple, but not all over). I want to put up some art prints. Not to be all fake trendy or whatever, just... art that I like. And a picture of the NYC skyline. And... other stuff that I don't have money for. Oh yeah, and a bar. Haha.
And I (finally!) went through all my clothes and put aside everything that no longer fits or I don't like (and they usually don't fit, either). I have two trash bags worth, and will be dropping them off at the donation center tomorrow. I cleared one drawer in my bureau (and half of another), and two plastic bins. So now I have a drawer all for my socks! I need to work on going through them, too... I have way too many, and I don't wear most. But that'll be another day. Right now I'm proud that I was able to be torn away from so many clothes (a lot of old band t-shirts; the rule was that if the t-shirt went at least halfway down to my knees, it was out). And I went through underwear as well and got rid of a lot of that, but for obvious reasons it's not being donated, just thrown out.
Now, if only I could do the same with my books... no way! I need more bookshelves, though. Ha. And I'm going to have to bring down my other CD shelf from my other room after Christmas, I have absolutely no more room on the ones down here... or room for DVDs. Hmm.
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[20 Dec 2005|09:00am] |
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mood |
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 panicked |
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music |
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Rise Against - State of the Union |
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I have the worst luck in the world.
Four hours until my conference with my creative writing professor. I've finished all the work, besides coming up with a new title for a poem. Now I just have to write my paper that's due by 2:30 for another class. I go to print my final creative writing story... and I'm out of black ink. So I replace the ink cartridge, but it won't print because I DON'T HAVE COLOR INK. Why are these depedant on each other to print a black and white document? AAARGH. So now I'm panicking and will have to go to the store to spend money I don't have on a really expensive ink cartridge, when I should be working on my paper. And instead of working on the paper while I can, I'm freaking out about not having ink.
Really, no more leaving assignments until the last minute. I swear it.
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[20 Dec 2005|01:45am] |
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mood |
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 good |
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This weekend was fun. Friday morning, Christie and I woke up and decided to go to Atlantic City for the night. So we did. Because it made sense. I'm all about the free drinks ($1 after tipping) and Christie loves gambling. So I indulged in vodka and sprite while she indulged in three hand poker. She won $1700 and I waltzed in the hotel lobby... so I'd say it was a success.
Then we raced back to New York for dinner Saturday night with some of Christie's friends at Ruby Tuesday. Jamie, Jody and Julie. I might have made up Jamie. But her name started with a J. And then us two, Christie and Christine. It was a lot of fun. We ended up hanging out in the parking lot like hooligan teenagers (I was the youngest by the way, they're all 25). It was crazy though. So much fun. Makes me kind of sad that we never hung out with them when I actually went to Hofstra... Christie and I just holed ourselves up in her room watching movies back then.
Sunday we holed ourselves up in the movie theatre watching movies. Finally saw Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire and The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. Both very, very good. Although it was funny, watching the second, in the battle scene, a griffin came on. Christie: "Oh, look, a gryffindor!" me: "Uh... a gryffindor?" Christie: (laughing and trying to continue the theme) "Yes, and those are huffalumps." me: "You mean... hufflepuffs?" Oh, man, I just about died. It was great.
And the movies were free, along with the hotel room in Atlantic City, and dinner and lunch there, so that also rocks.
And I got a new lightsaber, so any time someone wants to have a lightsaber duel... I'm the girl to see.
And I think things are going to turn out well with Matthew. *grin* I wrote him a silly little email on Friday, just like, "hey, checking to make sure this is the right email address" and I said something else (top secret! I only told Christie, while I was drunk...) and he replied today with a laugh. Aw man, I wish I could go hang out with him right now... but I'm "revising poems"... obviously. The thing is that I don't want a real heavy duty relationship right now. I just want to know that someone's possibly there for me. I don't know. A low key relationship. I really like him (obviously) but... I'm in a good place right now. But I'm always willing to be surprised. I don't know. He might come down and visit me at home for my birthday, so we'll see what happens in the month until then.
I'm kind of nervous about going home for break tomorrow. Because then I have a much greater chance of running into Erik. And I want to see him. But I want to see the Erik that I know... and I don't expect that to happen. And I kind of keep hoping that he'll surprise me. That he'll make an effort. Why can't I just fucking forget it and move on?
Okay, back to my work, so maybe I can get some sleep tonight. I can't wait until tomorrow night. I can sleep as long as I want! It'll be blissful.
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[16 Dec 2005|12:50am] |
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music |
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The Flaming Lips - Yoshimi Battle the Pink Robots, Pt. 1 |
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This is just for my own benefit for when I get home (yeah I'm in New York right now, and then going back to school on Sunday or Monday, until Tuesday and then Joy's wedding Tuesday night, and THEN I get to rest!).
Anyway. Redecorating my room this break. I want this as my border:
http://www.usawallpaper.com/yeredswrewab.html
Haha.
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[14 Dec 2005|11:22pm] |
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mood |
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 giddy |
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music |
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Lostprophets - Last Train Home |
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Talked to Matthew (apparently he prefers that, who knew? Everyone calls him Matt but he calls himself Matthew). Got his email address to keep in touch over break (he doesn't have AIM!). He was helping a friend with a French assignment, so I didn't stay long, but we did have a nice conversation about San Francisco and New Orleans, my two favorite cities, and both he shares an interest in (we were talking about how the rebuilding of New Orleans just won't be the same). So yeah, I had an actual conversation with him when I was sober! When we were both sober! And I happened to mention, "If you get bored, you can come by". Haha. I think he understood. I mean, come on, if it's already eleven at night, and a girl says to come over later... it's pretty obvious, isn't it?
And then I walked away with a huge grin on my face. And his email address, which he conveniently put on a post-it note, so it's now hanging above my desk. Woo!
I'm pretty sure I said I was done with crushes. That lasted a week. At least I'm done with avoiding crushes. That only lasted 20 awkward years.
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