crackwh0re__

I do not allow those around me the luxury of Ignorance. They either learn, or descend into Willful Ignorance.

And you have no idea how much you brighten up my day without even meaning to. You'll never know either because it would just ruin it.

This is the 3rd random act of it though. Thank you for being you. Thank you for the phone call. Thank you for everything,

tends to send out a better message for the world. if anyone knows this journal. god bless you. this is the only way you will find me. i need to go missing for awhile to find out who i am again. i keep loosing myself. you can tell when i am having a difficult time when i begin to do impulsive things. i.e.-hair dying. my hair is gross and dead and looks like literal shit. but i digress. thats not my issue here. i really dont know how to deal with a few things in my life. not sure what i want to change, but i know i want to change things. i know i need a job, and a car, and i want to go to school. modeling can get me places, but nothing like an education. guns n roses is making me quite happy at the moment. sweet child of mine is my theme song. "where do we go now?" such a line of confusion, yet truth. i talked to spencer until 5am last night and he is amazing. ive never spoken to someone besides my father, with so much wisdom. its also nice to hear someone is as crazy and brilliant as i. i will miss him whenever he leaves. i need to go clean out my life. my room to be exact. all the clutter is contaminating my thought process. food sounds nice too. oh horray the cardigans. "well you get what you give. and hell yes ive lived. but if you live as you learn. i dont think i can learn. oh with the sun in my eyes. suprise, im living a lie. but i dont seem to learn. no i dont think i can learn." good-dayyyyyy.

 The viewing for just the family is today at 3pm. Then dinner. Tomorrow is the funeral, then lunch and then back to Aunt Tina's for the family and close friends. I don't know if I can do this.... I miss Pop already :(



Started the gym and yoga today. I hurt.

 Maria is goingto take me out tonight and teach me some spanish dances :) I'm excited. She was showing me a few at work yesterday but all of the men coming into the store were being perverted about it so we had to stop.

Saw Tim lastnight. He told me that Amy was at the concert on the 29th. I guess she really does dislike me now.

Andy met up with me at the Grog 'n Grill lastnight. Gab was already there drunk by the time Maria and I showed up fafter work. Toes came along shortly after. Tim eventually got out of his hell hole job for a drink. Gab was attempting to talk to Andy about what 'we' are. She told me this afterwards. That should make for an awkward/amusing conversation, haha.

I need to call Kai to see if that women dropped off the papers to her. Need to get on that ASAP!


Things to do today:
Get paper from Kai
Get nails done
Wash clothes for tonight
Maybe get a haircut, its getting out of control (almost to my nips now!)
Buy a bike bc I reaaaally want one

They're in no specific order..