A night of ruined plans! So much frustration and disappointment. What do you do if your friend tells you she's miserable, yet presently admits to choosing her circumstances and plans a future with more of it? You do everything in your power to convince her that she can do better than that and be happier. You try to show her a direct connection between her thinking, her actions, and her unhappiness, the point being: change your thinking, improve your beliefs about yourself.

If she sees this, I hope she understands that I have to talk about it, just like she has to vent and tell me all the stuff she does.
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I wasn't going to post, leaving the nature of life and death to its difficult process. But I see the sadness in Jermain Jackson's face and voice and I have to spill my guts. People can say what they want about Michael. I'll never know what was true and what wasn't (all the bad stuff), but I do know that he brought love and joy into my family's house. The entire atmosphere lifted whenever he was on TV. He turned ordinary life into a celebration. And it was a dream come true to see him and his brothers on tour back in the 80's. I know he was absolutely precious to my mother, her favorite. He WILL be missed! Obviously a person in pain himself, may he find peace at last.

Thanks to everybody who sent me Atsushi links. I hope to get more reading up on interviews done. So far, I've learned only things about him that compel me to love him more. Had an awesome time creating CDs of Mp4s and making covers for them for my friend. Her computer doesn't download very well and now she doesn't have to. All those beautiful fan vids and great songs! Thanks to everyone who had a hand in that. Your efforts are appreciated! The love (and lust) that surrounds Atsushi is astounding.

I'd like to thank Vamppire.com (Sherri) for her talent and enthusiasm with her vids and her help in locating the source material. You're awesome and I like your taste in music!

Atsushi's hotness has hit me like a ton of bricks! That kind of thing rarely happens with me. And now I've found this old interview where he's so no-ego, yet sultry with that deep-voice. And the women in the audience sound like they're having orgasms! And he's looking at them like he has no idea he's responsible. And the host just has me cracking up.
I have to know what's going on. Does anyone know where I can find an English translation? (If it's written, any language will do.)

It's the Warattetomo interview found here:( Read more... )

Thanks for your help!!

Write what you want to see and feel. It doesn't get hard until you start to fear that you can't do it. Even then, it's just one page at a time. And anyone can do that. The anguish is there to show you the way. Think of searching for a movie or book...

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This is a little bit early, but...

Happy Birthday anorielle

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Be extra nice to yourself today! And everyday. Hope it's a great one. :-)

Same guy.

Have you seen this man?



Well, you should.

Thanks to uigenna for the vids of Atsushi. As easy on the eyes as he is, there’s also a soul there and a stunning heart and mind. You get this from his expression as a musician, whether you speak the language or not. I was very touched and will learn more about what he’s saying.

The vids:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B3OenxRO6_A
Perfection. Wonderful balance of artistry and personality. He becomes even more interesting beyond his looks. This is an older vid, I gather, and he’s moved on from that image. But I still love it. He has a great voice. I got the feeling that he’s singing about something that it’s very difficult to get people to understand. I’ll see if there’s a translation somewhere. Now that I see how the Japanese culture have acknowledged androgyny as a valid presence much more so than Americans have/can, I’m seriously considering learning the language. They have so many beautiful ideas that I’m sure suffer in translation. Yaoi is proof. And this is a great song!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9M83qG1zWWk
This is the first vid I watched. He’s much older here than he is in the picture above. He’s aged well, just wish he’d kept the eyebrows. While Japanese music is foreign to my ears, I was pleasantly shocked to realize he CAN sing very well! My ears were very much attuned to him! He sings in a way that you know he takes his voice and his ability to express with it very seriously. He has the “persona” of a pop artist, but the presence of the more studied artists that I’m used to in opera and film. He’s a keeper! I enjoyed this song.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kk5CKJ667To
I had to laugh. He reminded me of Edward Scissorhands. Can’t say that I understand the video’s concept, but I enjoyed the wet, syrupy metaphor and his “submissive” display.

:-)

Thanks again, Uigenna.

Edited to say that it looks like he's having an orgasm at the very very end of the "Dress" song. Lovely!!

Isn't he beautiful...



and


and


Courtesy of Googleimagesearch.com

Thanks to my new lj-friend, Torment2Romance, for introducing me to him and for the pics. If I hadn't been "pimping" Sonny I never woulda found him.
*grin*

The view near my job.

When I wrote Sonny, my goal was to rise above human missery, if only for one eternal moment. Seems ironic that I would naively cast the story into a den of misserable people. It certainly makes their ban laughable to me now. How they've mistaken compassion for weakness. No, my actions were not shrewd, but they were honest and sincere. In a way, I feel flattered by the ban. I've never known what would be popular, but I've always known what writing is powerful (to me). It certainly shook their foundation.

How refreshing to come through all of that and still wake up knowing that I'm on the right track. More certain than ever. Oh, and the letters from my readers speak louder than any ban. Thank you all so much. And now, I have a sequal to write.

It's very helpful to match the feelings with the words. That's what I do, after all...
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More BS from the transgender affair. I'm stronger than they think...
Forgive me M., for using your words to vent openly. But you bring up an interesting point.

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The moderator of the transgender community came forward to explain how I had offended the entire community and that I was banned. I appreciate the explanation because I just didn't get it. It does make sense, once explained. But no one was decent enough to do this. With my own history of transgender issues, I stand by my actions. Neither I, nor my work, is the monster that they fear. I portrayed my character respectfully and none of them read to find out that he's actually anti-sex opinionated and not a sex toy at all. Too bad they'll never know because they've already made up their minds.

You can read what the Mod wrote here:
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Thanks to all the readers who've shared their delight in Sonny. You are gay, straight, male, female, transgendered, and everything in between. Your opinions are valid and you re-affirm my knowing that Sonny's story is meant to bring joy to any reader capable of receiving it.

I discovered today that there are those in the transgender community who despise the fantasy capacity in which I've written my character. I can completely accept valid criticism, but not being called a trans-phobe who exploits transgendered people. I can completely allow someone to think my writing is crap, but not put up with the way they went looking for something to use in my story as amunition against me. And I certainly will not apologize for writing a character true to my heart, just because he isn't the politically correct character that they think he should be. A writer has to write what's in her heart. Valid criticism will be recognized. The opinions of four-legged reasoning will not be.

So the posters in the transgender community are telling me one thing, but those who come to me asking to read Sonny, are telling something else just as valid. And those who pay are proving that Sonny fills a void.

Every writer will face the public arena. And this is me facing it with pride.

If anyone is curious, the lashing that inspired this post is here: http://community.livejournal.com/transgender/2013105.html
But I urge you not to reply to anything. The people posting here are not interested in promoting understanding and unity, which is why I've stopped trying to reason with them, stopped trying to prove that I'm a friend, not the enemy. I know they have it tough in real-life issues, but that doesn't mean I should limit my writing to that. Fantasy soars above the limitations, that's why people read it. That's why I've written it. So be it.

Saw Angels and Demons today. Ewan McGreggor wears a mean cassock! I wanted someone (preferably masculine) to throw him down and ____ (you fill in the blank) him a number of times. Reminded me of Son of Anora. But then, it would.

I'm doing some house cleaning. Don't be offended if you're no longer on my friend's list. There's more than one of you. I'm no stranger to "being let go" so I hope no one's feelings are hurt. Just something I gotta do.

This little guy is the latest member of my family. My cousin, Cameron Devon, was born last Sunday. Just got back from a trip to Ohio to see him. I'm so in love with him. There's nothing like a newborn. Pure love in my arms. He only cried when he was hungry. The photo does not do him justice. Heavenly heavenly...

Anyone interested in going to the Yaoi convention this year? http://www.yaoicon.com/
I'm thinking about it.

(I did not take this picture. Don't know who did or where it came from but it's perfect for this post. If it's yours, pls let me know.)

Hey C.

I got your comment, but for some reason the link to comment back didn't show up. You're in my thoughts, too. I'm using this weekend to tackle a few writing projects. Slowly I've been feeling more inspired, out in the woods taking pictures -but not of ghosts. *shiver* (she's a paranormal investigator)

Thank God for Spring!! On good days, it makes me want to paint. It's so enlivening to take a walk on a green path. It makes me see how insane too much social structure can be (work, school, anything involving rules, etc.). We've accepted it as normal, but it's really not. It becomes a prison. I got some wonderful ideas for a picture book.

Well, gotta go while the energy is high.

Love you,

Brie