there's no tea, no bread, no potato scones, no crunchy nut cornflakes.
and i feel like a badgers arse.
i only vaguely remember getting home.
last night was great fun.
met ross, had food, bought disgusting wine, went to fearg's, played star wars.
then walking past the oran mor, we clock this guy
'that's patrick wolf'
'nah it's not shut up, it just looks like him'
'no really it is'
'aye very good shout patrick then'
'PAAAATRICK'
'yes'
so him and his band of merry men end up coming to scott's party with us.
so now we are on the guestlist for arcade fire tonight.
details are hazy from last night, but im told i had a good time.
i remember walking in the west end with no shoes on to which i now have a bazillion cuts on my feet, smoooooth move.
phoned in sick for work today, fiona wasnt sounding very happy, ha.
xxx

i feel quite a bit like a badgers arse, awh its so bad.
everything is so loud in college, and there is a dreadful smell coming up from the mechanics department.
but anyway, jarvis last night, fucking outstanding.
the man has the most classy banter i have ever heard, if only i were that witty.
met some crazy aberdonians, they were mental.
1990s were great, got a wee dedication, 'this is for fassbinder lady lyndsay'
(which im not sure if its good or not, he is infact calling me a german lesbian. riiight)
highlights of the night were definatley black magic, cunts are still running the world and he ended on SIDEWALKING BY JESUS AND THE MARY CHAIN. AH.
it was tremendous.
big alex k and the franz massive crew were there aswell, i went to pee and i just got this big shout in my ear 'eeeh where's your hair gone!?' and i was like 'yaaaas big alex k, im drunk and away for a piss SEE YA'
we went to sleazy's were many drinks were had.
quotes of the night were
chris - 'so alex what literature are you reading at the moment?'
chris - 'i feel like les dennis'
alex - 'that is a fucking insane skirt, especially when your drunk like me'
me - 'what shoe polish do you use, thats insanely buff'

then we went to box where me and daryn sat and called people's mobile from the daily record and told them we knew where their missing family was.
and then to phone childline and tell them that my dad beats me with a large woodenspoon and i love it.
it seemed like a grand idea at the time.
found big alex k in the paper and thought it a grand idea to cut it out for him, haha. oh dear.
got back home at 3, up at 9.
i should be in life drawing but i cant take much more naked folk, that man has thee most ridiculous penis ive ever seen. its so groce, so so so groce.

EDIT;
so later on at about 3pm i go to mono to purchase ross' birthday present from monorail, so go sit down and bob from franz is sitting a few tables away and i think 'seriously stop stalking me'
and then ross arrives we eat soup to sooth my hangover, and then big alex k walks in, we tell each other how delicate we each feel. and how much fun was had the previous night.
and ross makes a baw of himself after i try SO HARD to keep my cool, SO HARD.

tilly and the wall were quite good tonight, sound was shit.
so tired, im going to lie horizontally now.
xxx

well from what i can remember it was a great night.
started at mine at 4:30 with me and ali tanking southern comfort, then joined by stu, daryn and andrew. then there was malibu and allsorts.
went to the bus stop to get the last bus into town to find out we'd missed it.
so hopped on a paisley bus driven by a fucking loonatic welsh man who gave great banter, made it too paisley to find there was no trains on due to back weather, so we ended up getting a taxi which i thought would be extortionate but only £15.
got to town, went to nice'n'sleazy's for jagermeister, a whole bottle of wine, vodka's and kinderegg's! and we tampered with the pool table board which was awesome
no homosexuals on the table please, and something about hassle and the hoff.
we met chris and drank more, then went to the abc.
where i was already feeling rather away with it.
got to the abc where we ran into daryl! which was amazing, as i hadnt seen him in sometime.
we drank more, and chris bought champagne for £5 by the glass to which i told him he was a twat. tequilla shots. white wine. southern comfort...
the 1990's were fucking hilarious, awh they are groovtastic.
me and stu thought it'd be amazing to go up on the balcony and throw ice cubes at people, which turned out to actually be amazing. some guy just sat and stared at us so we thought it'd kind to wave.
then we went to watch sons&daughters who were fucking magnificent, it was tremendous.
i can't decide which member i fancy the most, ali's choice was eilidh cause she is the bass player i think, haha, but im a big adele and scott fan.
awwwwwwh scott patterson, i was so gutted i couldnt find him, i was going to charm him with my womanly ways.
inbetween all that i caught a small part of union of knives with stu who were great but the bells were approaching so i thought it best i find my crew.
after that we danced for several hours.
ahahaha, me and stu danced with the 1990's which was absolutely hilarious.
andrew came running about telling us that barry hyde from the futureheads but i thought it was probably the insane amount of alcohol he had consumed so i told him to shut it.
it was round about then we decided to leave and go to some crazy party in cathcart with the rainbowsheep mob.
so ali decided to go home, as i have a feeling that he might have needed to chunder, haha.
so me, stu, daryn, chris, andrew and daryl. and also neil! who i forgot to mention earlier, i ramned my mobile number in his phone and told him to phone me when he wanted to head to this party.
so we went outside and who do i see?
"BAARRRYYYY HYYYYYDDDEEEE, barry? of futureheads stance? is that seriously you? OH OH OH. why are you in glasgow? schmeriokjdi blhaioiflkds! no this is my subway, get your fucking own mate. HAPPY NEW YEAR, BYEEEEEEEE"
turns out he now lives in glasgow, with his girlfriend laura, i thought that was strrraaannnge.
then went to a huge taxi queue to which i told everyone that barry hyde was waiting to buy chips and started singing futureheads at everyone. i dont even bloody well like the futureheads which is funnier.
we eventually get in a taxi and start being a cunt to people, haha.
got to cathcart, and find drunken rainbowsheep.
this is where i find everything funny and me and daryn decide it'd be an awesome idea to put rum and coke, of seriously huge amounts, into a saucepan and drink it. with straws that took us a crazy amount of time to find. this then takes us 8 people and 2 hours to drink.
i cunted it an absolute tank in leila's living room to which i have serious injurys.
there was tears, which i thought was funny but then turned out to be my fault... then i found that even funnier, haha.
it must have been about 7am when we decided to phone a taxi, eventually get 2 taxi's and head back to mine in erskine. i fell asleep in the taxi and wake up and my contact lenses stuck to my eyeballs.
i then head to my bed at 9am, didnt get to sleep till about 12 cause i was having crazy drunken hallucinations which i didnt enjoy. and woke up at 4 when daryn told me he was cooking my potato scones and bacon to which i jumped out of bed at.
andrew and chris left whenever. and then me, daryn and stu eat some more, tidy up and then watch star wars till about 6pm when they decided to go home.
and then my dad picked me up and took me too his mainly cause i didnt wanna spend new year day alone and was hungry and didnt feel like cooking anything, though that morrisions own pepperoni pizza was just asking for it.
now i think i may go pass out somewhere at one point, i thought i wouldnt be hung over as i didnt technically go to sleep, but that was a groce misunderstanding with the litres of alcohol i must have consumped and now most definatley feel like shite.
hope all your nights was good fun, tell me allll about it!
xxx

i had an awesome time last night with laura

dirty pretty things at carling. was rather good they played good olde days to which it left me rather confused. i was like... they actually just played it.
laura actually creamed herself, i smelt it... ha.
afterparty at barfly.
glasvegas djing.
lots of JAEGERMEISTER, YAAAAS.
vodka, lemonade and lime.
i stole things like cd's and pizza's.
laura raped carl barat.
BELGODOFF was there, aka bob geldoff lookalike. but laura was so fucked so just couldnt quite get her mouth around it
me gunna roundhouse some guy cause he felt laura's bum.
SHONA and JANE.
breast feeling, dunno how that happened.
PULP AND JAMIE T.
metro riots margaret (:
LAUREN GLASGOW giving everyone abuse, which was priceless cause she looks so fucking adorable. i do not fancy her...
awh man christina and gillian, haha, priceless mate. that was peachy.
stealing james' broken headphones and whipping rab and i think pizza man.
i got a coley back whilst trying to break into the german market.
then nearly weed myself because i was told there would be nazi's
rab pushing paul in that buggy.
ramming the end of it up james' nose.
legendary pizza man who me and laura abused by stealing about half his pizza.
(his name was ross, lmao, not pizza man)
boys urinating and paul letting the air in that van down.
talk of boobs and badges.
being REALLY hurt cause i was told i was second best.
saying bye about eight times.
mcdonalds...
walking...
a REALLY expensive taxi...
flat, trying not to wake dad up.
3 hours of sleep.
laura making SHEXAY NOISES IN HER SLEEP, OH YEAH BABY.
9 hour shift today, comes HIGHLY unrecommended.
at least i didnt vomit on public transport.
im going to go die in a corner now.
boo.
haha, christina's photos to come, FUUUCK.

i also got a new hair do

i took it when i was drunk and trying to look sexay, did it work? PPFFT.
xxx

come along, you know you wanna.
xxx

i fucking hate turning on mtv2 to see the dykeenies shouting at me.
it makes me ANGRY.
screw them.

anyway, yeah ive neglected livejournal.
whooops.
but if anyone would like to come out and celebrate me turning the big 18 then we are meeting at firewater at 8pm on BOTH thursday and friday.
thursday night i would like to go to the art school and friday night its fucking abc time bad boys!

i had an awesome night at amanda's.
i made a joint that was so hefty it made stuuu throw up, haha. yus.
there are photos on my myspace.

over and out!
xxx

i fancy the fucking pants off this man.
xxx

so all i actually do is go out and go to gigs it seems.
not all true, college is being rather stressful.
its only 3 months roughly till i have to submit my portfolio, SHIT.
i actually have to get a move on big time.

okay so i do go to a lot of gigs.

tuesday - the gossip @ oran mor.
it was halloween so i dressed up as a flapper which was cool considering it my outfit cost about a tenner.
they were awesome and they all got naked apart from nathan (DAMN)
beth was big, jiggily and full of cellulite.

wednesday - gogol bordello @ carling academy.
part of the eastpak tour, some shitter called danke jones supported.
then bedouin soundclash who were lovely.
and then i was in mosh pits, and lots of dancing and very sore limbs.

saturday - glasvegas @ the art school
i got insanely drunk and danced a lot.
ross went home at 10:30.
gary powell was there and ofcourse i talked the upmost shite to him.
me and andrew went to amanda's at 3:30am and saw the aftermath of the party.

tuesday - muse @ the secc.
it was awesome.
apart from playing NOTHING from their first album, eh whit?
i fought to the fron then instantly regretted it. though i did meet garett.
some bastard also ripped my setlist and stole it from me.

i also go to lifedrawing on a tuesday night at the tramway.
my teacher, dougie, ive had this feeling ive known him from somewhere else.
and i thought, must be from something arty ive done.
turns out he is the guitarist from
MOTHER AND THE ADDICTS.
boy did i feel like a plum.
after you know, however many times ive seen them (even if all times were accidental)
but i felt a hell of a sheepish.
xxx

christ how bad are donner kebab's, never again.

saturday night-
went to mono. then nice'n'sleazy's, then firewater.
got so drunk, hurt my neck like a bitch and fucking severed nerves in my foot.
well almost, the abc is vicious.

sunday-
andrew's birthday gathering, which mean't... no mystery jets, or photographing paddingtons at firewater
but it was good fun all the same. got to meet the whole cowan tribe which was quite cool, as they are a lot ncier than his parents (not hard.)
thought it'd be akward but it was quite pleasant. went home, did college stuff, lights out 10:30.

monday-
college, then to the oran mor for... SPINTO BAND.
after almost a year of waiting and managing to miss 3 of their gigs having buying tickets to all of them.
and it didn't disappoint.
a rather fantastic rendition of ELO's - mr blue sky to round it off.
and THEN, OH THEN.
went up to the bar at the end but who should toddle by me.
BLAINE HARRISON.
i crapped it and squeaked hello and he smiled back.
ross asked him if he had been in an accident and if he was okay, i died inside and blaine said 'no, im disabled.'
embarressment to the extreme.
was gunna get things signed by tiny dancers, spinto and mystery jets, but severe lack of funds prevented that.
lol, one guy mistook ross for sam from spinto whilst taking a piss, most amusing.

andrew had a very nice 18th and i spent too much money that i don't have on him.
should have talked to blaine... damn.
blowitout will be so jealous, and if it was possible i think i'd get slapped, soooorry.
but what i did think was 'christ she's gunna be jealous' lol
well bring on the 70's outfit tomorrow and the gossip at the oran mor, oh yes.
nighteyo xxx

wow did i have a good night or what?
i went to see we are scientists at the carling academy.
au revoire simone, and THE BLOOD ARM who are AMAZZINNNGGG.
and then we are scientists.
but who else would be there?
but dear alex kapranos and bob hardy from franz ferdinand, who was joined by the two male memebers of the sons&daughters whose names elude me at the moment.
so i chatted to them and alex remembered me and eveeeryything, it was moist.
so we chatted about;
t in the park, rockAfield, how much we miss stereo, how he is going on tour with the cribs, how good the blood arm are. and a whole pile of shite.
then we stopped bugging them
and we are scientists played and it was grrreat.

then i walked andrew to central and met up with homeboys in firewater and theeeeeeeeeeeen we went to stavka to see the NEW YORK DOLLS dj. was cool though i havnt heard much of them.
and the towers of london were walking about being cuntish. it was cool.
and thats about it reaaalllllyyyyy.
nighteyo xxx

p.s. i should update about a whole pile of crap but i actually CANT be arsed.

wooooooweeee.
so my good friend iamchemist AKA greg elder was handpicked by imogen heap to open for her.
so i got a wee photopass beast.
seriously, that 3 song rule sucks.
though i got to hang backstage in greg's dressing room, which was suave i tell you.
but seriously, i met imogen heap.

( imogen heap )

aaah the man of the night.
i love him
( IAMCHEMIST )
today i also got a new mobile.
and spinto band tickets, i'll be gutted if i managed to miss them again.
and yesterday, i got a new hair do.
( hair do )
apparently it looks like the chick from camera obsura's.
it'll be so short when its curly...
eeek
xxx

so i won tickets to see the scissor sisters in trafalgur square.
it was moist.
amanda came with me.
camera broke, so i actually didnt get any scissor sisters pictures :(
but ofcourse it worked bloody fine after the gig... ARGH.

so we national expressed it down to london overnight.
got in at 6:30, eventually found our tube stop.
got to hostel. slept till 11.
went out to camden, took NO PHOTOS in camden, why? i dont know.
bought a lot of shit there.
A LOT OF SHIT THERE.
went to covent gardens where me and amanda got really drunk and ate cheesecake.
and this cheesecake ACTUALLY MADE ME MOIST, i kid you not.

we stumbled back to our hostel to get changed into our red gear, and then to trafalgur square, and it was AMAZING.
kylie minogue introduced them onstage and i was all AAAAH KYLIE.
we danced out hearts out and i drank wine that tasted like paintstriper.

HOPPED on a tube to old street station
went to find macbeth's pub to hear the metro riots play like their last song... nooooo.
hung about for a while.
missed the tube back.
got the FUNNIEST message ever.
found 4 croatian girls in our room, guttor.
slept.
got up went to station and home
( and now for my amazing 9 photos )

GOOD THINGS THAT HAPPENED TODAY-
i got up at three.
i went job hunting.
work over paid me £200! YAS.
went to see iamchemist.
ali's quote of the night
"if i ever contract syphillis, im gunna offer tom a bumming"
yaaaaas.

BAD THINGS-
brigid turned up at mixing rooms last night and i cried in the toilet.
whore.

so i go to check my friends entries and all i get is
OMG KILLERS LEAK TOTALLY EVERYWHERE.
geesh, they are like so 3 years ago...
ok so yes i downloaded the album.

so after i had the shittiest weekend of my whole entire life.
i had the absolute best monday ever.
well monday night.
me, greg and amanda made plans to go to xscape for bowling etc.
and then RAB from GLASVEGAS.
who WANTS ME.
messaged me going
"ive put you on the guestlist for tonight for the oran mor if you like to come along, would be lovely to see you. give me a phone"
he wants my schlong.
but yeah i was on as lyndsay vegas plus 1
so dear greg came along with me.

AND MY GOD IT WAS AN INDIE SUPERSTAR WHORE HOUSE.
totally everyone was there.
first of all bands playing

-the 10 to 5 project
-gordon mcintyre
-bmx bandits (HOLY HELL)
-GLASVEGAS

so we were watching to 10 to 5 project and i decide to go peee.
whose standing outside?
BILLY BOYD
aka PEREGRIN TOOK.
i actually scared him shitless i was like
'AAAH BILLY OH MY GOD HOW ARE YOU MY NAME IS LYNDSAY ARE YOU HAVING A GOOD NIGHT. YOUR SO SMALL'
well almost, we chatted till i desperately needed to pee.
then wished i had a good night.
then went back and told greg, who was like PEREGRIN TOOK. YAAAAS.

then i turn around after gordon mcintyre and see almost all of belle and sebastian, ofcourse minus stuart cause he is a CUNTO.
and i was all STEVIIIIEEEEE. but he is also a baw so oh well.

and then everyone who was everyone in glasgow was there.
BIG JIM.
who i stayed away from cause nearly killed me last time.
all of pop up were there, and michael who was asking for hannah and i was like... naw pal.
and bjorn and eric of say dirty records, who said 'hallo'
yeah it was amazing.

i managed to avoid RAB the whole night cause im feart.
i did talk to him at the end and thanked him and such, he is a lovely boy.
but GLASVEGAS were AMAZING as always
and then me and greg were onstage dancing with them.
it was actually hilarious
greg looked so funny, he can't dance.
WHERE AS I CLEARLY CAN

yaaaas

im going out to the mixing rooms tonight and im going to kick someone in the ovaries followed by everywhere else :)
xxx

WHEN DRUNK
-don't get into group cuddles with members of larrikin love. they hurt.
-don't let any of your friends near michael from popup, he is SLEAZY.
-don't go into randomn taxi's with michael and go to crazy arty drug fuelled reggae clubs.

well actually that was quite funny.

but do hang about with eileen, brigid and hannah more. they are hilarious.
need to update about london soon
xxx

in london.
with amanda.
metro riots aswell.
OH ITS ALL GOOD.

tonight was good.
ross and andrea at rio cafe
lots of sweets
amanda, daryn and hannah, it was lovely.
and penny football!
joined by bova beast.
awwwwh
and im going to have a great weekend in london
FREE TICKETS TO SEE THE SCISSOR SISTERS
actual yas.
xxx

p.s. i like paolo nutini. he is a sexy man.

( more under here )
firebrand_boy were amazing!
i urge you all to go see them
such lovely boys.
euan joined me aswell, it was lovely.
as did NAVEED from still game. and jim gellatly, impressed or what?
i was gunna throttle jim gellatly for almost flooring me at indian summer, but i settled for a hello instead.

after kings tuts i went to meet greg and sean.
and then me and greg went to amanda's
and got VERY drunk.
VERY DRUNK.
i'll show you photos of that some other time.
xxx

p.s. what's up with the new photobucket?
its gay
though im impressed with this 'flock' software
its dandy.

rikki's suprised brithday party.
me and huggy trying to rape greg.
hilarity follows.
id like to point out that me and huggy were FUCKED
YAAASSSS
xxx

p.s. i get to see british sea power tonight! cause the fire_brand boy's are supporting. and i love them. and they love me. all is good. ALL IS GOOD.

today was bad.
i woke up with the worse hangover ever
only to find out steve irwin had died.
it was sadder than when richard whitley died.
if david hasselhoff dies anytime soon, i may aswell just die myself.
seriously, freak accident or what?
stingrayed in the heart.
r.i.p mate.

on other news, im very happy with the prospect that russell brand might be locked up.

AND indian summer was the best weekend ever.
actually better than t this year
HIGHLIGHTS
-walking in to be greeted by nick mccarthy
-YEAH YEAH YEAH'S
-waiting an hour in the toilet queue BUT seeing and talking to bob from franz ferdinand, and being remembered :)
-white wine
-spazztastic dancing to hot chip.

-meeting tapes 'n tapes and shaking the lead singer's hand WITHOUT washing my hands from being at the toilet, muah ha. and telling him to go see glasvegas
-being spectacularly dingyed by half of tilly and the wall on the croquet field
-having a lovely chat with the other half of tilly and the wall
-being dry with my very stylish poncho
-meeting the daly twins, and being asked if we were triplets.
-southern comfort tent with its amazing cocktails and best dancing ever.
-getting chatted up by andrew's old computing teacher, then andrew shouting 'MR MCGREGOR' in his face.
-getting photographed for a fashion magazine, when i thought i looked highly unfashionable.
-saying goodbye to my green shoes in style.
-dancing like an absolute idiot to glasvegas
-talking to james from glasvegas about randomn shite.
-chris saying 'someone call the PTA'
-THE AFTERPARTY AT THE ABC, FREEEEEEEE ADMISSION BABY.
-and a whole pile of shite i can't remember

that is all
xxx

WELL
LES INC BROKE UP
ACUTALLY GUTTED.
its okay lanna, we'll survive.
poor billy, though they say he is doing well.

IM SO LOOKING FORWARD TO TOMORROW AND SUNDAY.
FUCKING INDIAN SUMMER BEAST
LINE-UP
ITS ACTUALLY GUNNA BE MOIIIIST.
i made the best tshirt aswell
its just plain white and has big black letters that say 'HOMEBOY'
lol.

this week has been good.
wednesday was IMOGEN HEAP
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
it was magical.
thursday and friday, work.
it was fucking gay.
2 - 11:30pm
actual slave labour.
today was the worst and best shift EVER.
it was so busy and stressful
but after that had ended we all helped ourselves to drinks.
THEN, james gave me a lift home and we smoked weed on the way home
didnt know he was like that
i was nicely suprsied
well i'll update after indian summer
have a nice weekend :)
xxx

i crowd surfer to i get along
shouted 'fuck em' at carl barat full force.
made a 'metro riots' tshirt
so many people asked me if they were supporting
SADLY NOT.
though we did have glasvegas who were FUCKING amazing.
rab mysapced messaged me saying he spotted me spazz dancing in the crowd.
lol, he looks like michael hamilton.

met margaret the 40 year old scenester.
she was lovely.
AND DOUGIE WAS THERE, WAS BEAST.
the corn exchange actually shook last night, the whole place was like a huge crazy dancefloor.
was mental.
i broke the leg off my glasses aswell, DOH.

college has been good.
up at 6:30am everyday though :(
bought £200 worth of materials.
made friends with a 32 year old irish man name ian.
he is sweet.
everything is good good good.
imogen heap tomorrow night with the laura again
YAS
battery about to run about, so its a quick update
nighteyo
xxx