Saturday, December 20th, 2008
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10:51 pm - New account!
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Friday, December 19th, 2008
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1:46 pm
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Today I keep thinking back to the moment I first met my Bonded at the airport.Remembering how she rushed into my arms and I held her close to me.I don't think I have been more happy in my entire life than in that moment.
I wish I could go back to that moment,live that moment again along with the two weeks we had together.I miss her so much and not knowing when I get to be with her next time is taking its toll on me.
I know that one day we will live together,that is the day I wish and work for everyday.Now I truly understand what it means to be in love.
Christmas is almost here but I don't really feel that joy I usually get around this holiday.The weather is ruining much of it.I fear there will never be snow around Christmas again and I need the snow to get into the Christmas spirit.
I've applied for 6-7 jobs so far and I really hope I get one of them.Knowing I at least have my job at the fair is some consolation but I need to earn way more money than that.Maybe luck will come my way.
current mood:  sleepy
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Saturday, November 15th, 2008
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2:57 pm - Countdown and video games etc
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Been having trouble with my right shoulder for the past week and a half.Turned out I had a muscular inflammation which is being taken cared of with anti-inflammatory painkillers.Can't be disabled when I go to be with Jamie ;)
Because of the pain I was in I wasn't able to work during this fair which sucks now I wont be getting any money in December...I will be broke for real.I'll live of what I have left when I get back from the states.Hopefully I'll get money for my birthday or something...good thing I still live at home with understanding parents,but still.I want to be independent and take care of myself...
Next Saturday I am finally gonna be with my fiancée,my Jamie! I almost can't believe its about to finally happen! But I am beyond words for how happy and excited I am about this!
Today I am playing video games on my dear old NES,the only way to go! It's the only game I own,bought it together with my sister about 18 years ago and I still love it.Old school you know ;) Wish I had more games though,like Megaman and Super Mario 2. Playing Gargoyles Quest right now which is damn fun but tricky,don't think I ever finished it so that is my goal today.
Mom and I did talk about getting a Nintendo Wii since it's got these exercise games and we thought,hey why not work out and have fun at the same time?! But we can't afford that right now,specially not me.
Bought the new volume of Hellsing and like the last volume it was all gore and very little story,although it did hold quite a big surprise.Hellsing is the only manga I read these days.Sorta fell out of the loop with the whole anime/manga thing.I do still like it but I am more picky these days I suppose,haha.Want to get my hands on more Ghibli movies like Porco Rosso and Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind.
current mood:  7 DAYS!
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Tuesday, November 4th, 2008
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11:38 am
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Laying on my bed and can't help but smile.18 days left now and the time is running fast which is to my liking.Have a birthday party to handle this weekend and then it will be 14 days until I can finally be with you.
Emotions are running wild in me,getting ready to explode and I will let them.
I love you so much!
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Saturday, October 4th, 2008
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8:25 pm
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Stupid hormones making me feel all whimpery and ready to cry at any given time! Right now it feels like stuff I say and do come out wrong for some reason.I blame it all on the damn hormones!
Sent my lady a ring shaped like a rose and she thought it was beautiful which warmed my heart.I really like giving her small gifts such as this one.
Not much is going on otherwise.Working at the fair whenever I get the chance.I have school for another three weeks and it ends with a test.That will be interesting.
Sweden Rock Cruise on Thursday next week,that will be fun,going with lots of people.
49 days to go...
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Thursday, September 18th, 2008
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9:19 pm
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The work I am doing for two weeks is so damn boring! Guarding a giant note board in a mall is not the most fun thing to do.Sure it's good money,but 4 hours a day is a damn long time doing nothing.Tomorrow morning I'm bringing my book with me to do some reading since they said it was alright as long as I make sure nobody puts something stupid on the board.
This weekend I'm going with my class to a place in the country for behavior studies,mainly on deers that they keep there.It will be fun and I am glad I have made friends with this nice girl so we have each other.Leaving early saturday morning and will be back home on sunday evening.
Got my doctor to write a permit for my medicine.I want it in case there are any questions at the airport when I got to the United States.For this slip of paper I have to pay 250 kronor! That is fucking insane,but I'll pay it.Don't feel like risking it in case they ask about my meds.
Had a talk with Jamie the other night,a very good talk. We both have our fears and insecurity about random things.But when it comes down to it we both know where we stand and that we have each other.I love her so very much!
64 days to go...
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Tuesday, September 9th, 2008
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7:33 pm
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I really miss my characters.I want to play them again,use them in some way.Thinking of writing something with them but it's not the same thing as doing an rp...
I think I have some sort of "fall depression" at the moment.I just feel sort of sad and grumpy.I guess most has to do with wanting to be with Jamie.Emotions does that to you.
Got a call today being offered a job for two weeks and of course I took it.Hopefully it will lead to more work!
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Thursday, September 4th, 2008
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7:31 pm
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Why is it that everytime I get my period I turn into such a woman?! Damn you hormones!!
Other than that school is fun and so far no homework haha!
I'm also back working at the Fair and its fun.People have missed me and I have missed them.
79 days to go
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Wednesday, August 20th, 2008
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10:04 pm
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Finger cut bloody on a can of food
Counting the last days at Bauhaus
Engaging in a new fandom to rp in
Slowly saying goodbye to old characters
Pointless entry...perhaps
94 days to go
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Saturday, August 16th, 2008
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11:46 pm
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Last night me and some friends had a movie night at Tess's place.It was fun and we even watched Silent Hill which I was against first seeing how I don't like horror movies but it wasn't really scary at all and not very good either.We also watched Sin City which is a damn good movie!
Richard fell asleep on Tess bed and she and I had a hard time trying not to laugh as we took some pics of him cradling her Homer Simpson plushie XD
Today I went with Amelie and Richard to see Mama Mia! As expected I loved it.A true feel good movie and overall it left you with a big ball of joy in your stomach.I even cried at one time because of all the love which made me think of Jamie and all emotions sort of exploded inside of me,heh,love is truly a wonderful emotion.
98 days to go...
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Wednesday, August 13th, 2008
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11:37 pm
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So I didn't get to keep my job at Bauhaus.I admit I was surprised by this because I really thought they would keep me and so did several others when I told them this was not the case.I know I do a good job and I handle the customers in a good professional way...but eh...nothing to do but to move on.
I called the Fair and told them I can work from the end of August til middle of November which they were glad to hear.So I will at least earn money thanks to that job.I'm also going to study two nights every week.Taking an orientation class in Ethology which is something I am really interested in so that will be fun plus I will get some money for doing that,hehe.
Three more months to go before I can be with my Jamie.Lately I have been thinking about just how much she means to me and always has.It feels sort of fantastic that after everything we've been through she is finally mine.Right now I'm longing to be with her for real.To be able to hold her,touch her and kiss her!
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Friday, July 25th, 2008
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1:23 pm - Been a while since I wrote anything here...
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At the moment I have a weird cold,I say weird because the only symptoms I have is that I am dead tired and my stomach is hurting a bit.Staying home from work for a few more days since all I do is sleep right now.But I am feeling better so it will soon go away.
Jamie got the heads up yesterday that she is indeed going back to school.This was a huge relieve for her and me as well.I'm happy she gets to go back to a school she really likes going to and also that now I can indeed go and be with her! Go you baby!
Our relationship keeps getting better and better.Like all couples we have small things to sort out and we do so using the keyword COMMUNICATING!I am amazed at how many couples actually don't talk to each other about things that bother them.I mean if you can't talk to your lover then who can you talk to?
Since I'm a season worker I don't get a vacation (again) but next weekend me and Tess are going on a 24 hour cruise on this new cruiser called Galaxy.That's gonna be swell! We'll drink some beer,hang out and I promised to get on the dance floor >_<
Early morning on August 7th Tess,Amelie and me leave for Medieval Week!! We only get to spend 2,5 days there but it's enough for me!Dressing up as a pirate again and this year I even have a coat! Really looking forward to those days of pure relaxation!
current mood: calm
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Saturday, July 5th, 2008
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10:39 pm
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Just saw the second Narnia movie and I must say that even though it lacked the same magic as the first movie I rather much enjoyed it.I personally liked the dark tone of the movie and it felt as if they were really fighting for their survival.And I got my dose of Aslan!! ^___^
They had a short trailer thing for Wall-e and I so can't wait to see it!! He's so freaking cute!
Miss my angel like crazy and I am counting the days...140 to go so far.
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Saturday, June 28th, 2008
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11:13 pm
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Two minds clashing,two ways of hurting
Harsh words not meant to be used
Moments filled with pain an misunderstanding
Then a slow response,a gentle tone
Things are alright,words forgiven
In the end,everything is better,stronger
Love as it should be,conquering all
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Saturday, June 21st, 2008
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10:25 pm
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How do you help the one who mean the most to you when you can't be there in person.You can't be there to hold,touch or comfort your most beloved one when you're aching in your soul to be able to do so.
Tonight more than anything I wanted to be by her side to comfort her and hold her close.All I could do was tell her things will be better further on...I try to always look at things in a positive way but she is hurting and I hate to see that.If I could give up my job I would go to her in an hearbeat and take her away from where she currently is...but I can't.
I don't lie when I say that I would go through hell for her.She is the world to me and I know that in the end we'll be together but the way there is so difficult.But we have each other and that is the most important thing.I told her this and she agreed.
I stand by the one I love and I love her so much that words can not describe it.
current mood:  We will make it!
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Monday, June 16th, 2008
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10:46 am - more on the Stress
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Well the stress has not eased on me and now it's turned into a case of gastric catarrh...
Had to call in sick this morning cause the stomach is aching up so much I felt like crying plus I have a swelling because it's so upset.Thankfully I managed to arrange so I now have 5 days off and wont be working until Sunday.Mom gave me some pills to take to help ease the pain and they are working so far in combination but if it's not easing up within a few days I am going to see the doctor to see what is going on.
As a side effect to this I am in a really bad mood which I informed mom of and she understood,having been there herself.So today I will spend most of the time in my room watching movies and be alone cause I really need it.I didn't want to tell her that what I really need is a few days alone in the house.That would be mean of me since I know she can't get out and do stuff.
Hopefully this will subside soon so I can go back to feeling normal,or as normal as I can be haha!
current mood: aggravated
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Friday, June 13th, 2008
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6:36 pm - Sorta stressed out
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I've been feeling tired lately and don't really feel like working.Not that I don't like my job or my coworkers or anything like that.I just feel like I am working so much.I thought it was just me being over dramatic but today I got it confirmed from some of the people I work with.Like one woman pointed out "You're always here! And if we need more people and ask if you can work you say you already am schedualed to work". No wonder I feel like I need some days off.
Gonna see if I can arrange it so I can have five days off next week,I really need them to just relax and do stuff I want to do.
Longing for November now more than ever and soon I will have the engagment ring on my finger!
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Thursday, June 5th, 2008
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10:55 am
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Mom is in pain and crying and there is NOTHING I can do because I can't even begin to understand the pain she is in.I only know if I were in pain like that I would drop dead because I couldn't haandle it...I want her to be healthy again and not be in pain...wishes,wishes...what are they good for?!
current mood: worried
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Friday, May 23rd, 2008
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10:56 pm
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Bad News: Got food poisoned today....
Good News: Ordered the engagement rings today!!!!
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Wednesday, May 14th, 2008
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2:44 pm - Friends
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This is an entry about friend.I do not have very many of them but those I have I consider to be real friends!
Tess:
We've only known each other for a few months but we've gotten really close and we can talk about everything and find support in each other when we need it.We have the same sense of humor and we're never bored in each others presence.I am so glad to have met you!
Twinflower:
We have known each other since New Years Eve and I think we both remember that faithful night,haha! Over these past few months we have become friends (despite what some might think of that *smirk*)and I am glad we have.We have so much in common and we can talk about most things in life and vent to one another (specially about a certain subject).Really glad we have each other!
Hanna:
We meet while working at the bakery and quickly became friends.We hung out all summer of 2006 and then in October she flew off to Australia and didn't return until a year later! And only to be in sweden for two months until she flew back yet again and has been gone since. But she is coming home to Sweden for 2,5 weeks in June and I am jumping with joy!
Lina:
We've known each other since school and even though we've had our ups and downs we keep in touch and hang out every now and then.Specially now that we're neighbors which makes things easier,haha.We have the type of friendship were words are sometimes not needed which we both know have spooked people on occasions,hehe.
Kinda funny to look at it now and see that there are no guys up there.To tell the truth I am sort of tired of the guys I know at the moment.One big reason is because I'm becoming an adult in a sense while they I fear...never will.
To all of you! You are the best and I love you all!
current mood: cade warm me
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