Hey, Brian I ordered Bruderschaft's Forever, do you have any notions about what I may expect from it?

I know it's a compilation of Ronan Harris of VNV Nation, Stephen Grohl of Apoptygma Berzerk and the guy who does the Icon of Coul beats, but I was wondering if I could have your official DJ opinion of it.

Moved elsewhere.

Rare Exports Inc.

So, wrote an opinion about a baseball stadium with no parking and bad public transportaion being stupid. I didn't do much during psych, however, I will be hosting a short film review program for Video. Discuss more tomorrow.
Slept during 5th period, finall got Varsity Questions in NCAL, that was cool.
Haven't yet completed the Oresteia intro like I was supposed to. Whoops.
Oh, however I was awarded a 7,000 dollar scholarship by St. Xavier University in Chicago Illinois, although I didn't apply. What the fuck?

Mmmwhat else.

Oh, Danielle was wonderful today, and I counseled Megan in a humaninitarian way.
This is something of a landmark, in that I've finally translated something I've done for a long time on the internet (console and debate with people about moral matters) and brought it to the physical realm, where it worked like it was supposed to.
I've got little romantic interest in the girl, but she is fun to be around. I might turn her into a pet humanitarian project for the remainder of the time I spend at my high school.

I've been feeling very humanitarian lately. The whole speaking about injustices, comradarie among your fellow man, society is flawed, philosophical and such lately. It's kinda nice.
Now, I go read Lord Byron, and then bed.
From a towel.

Date:	2004-02-03 22:12
Subject:	Lost in Translation
Security:	Public
Mood:	calm

So, I just saw Lost in Translation.
It was a very different movie than I expected it to be.
And it was even better. There was less dialogue, a less linear story, but still very linear. It all made sense, the music cues were spot on, the tension in the beginning, the inferring of the relationship, the things you don't see are as important as the ones you do see. The entire thing was just one great big thing.
It was very stylistic, it was very well organized, very well concieved.
Screw RotK. I liked this much much better because it made me think, and it was very real.

Date:	2004-02-03 18:39
Subject:	...Farg.
Security:	Public
Mood:	annoyed

You know what pisses me off? Social Drama, and the refusal of people to truthfully address their feelings and be able to communicate those feelings to others.

Perhaps I can't expect people to adhere to the way I address society and things. But it's really annoying to cater to people's modesty
Oh well, I suppose I'll go balls first with brutal honesty into whatever else people throw at me.

Date:	2004-02-02 20:53
Subject:	Ooooooh
Security:	Public
Mood:	chipper

So. I spin off on my little cog, but I'm still socially acceptable.
Dig it.
I'm going to college.
They say so.
Hell, they're willing to PAY me to go.
Knox College accepted me, with 9,500 scholarships. Will I go there? I have no idea. I like the idea of wheeling and dealing.
So, if all goes afoul? I have at least one college to go to, for at least a year. Yeah. I can dig it.

Mm, probably will see Lost in Translation tomorrow, upping best Picture count to two. Last year was three. I can rent Seabiscuit.
It will also up my Best Actor count to two, and my best director and screenplay to two as well.
Jack's delivering Heathers, Dark City, and Legends, or The Crow to me tomorrow, or I grap his man nipples.
Like I said, I spin on my own frequency.
I also have a Clockwork Orange to watch.
And read so many things.
Yay new semester being easy.

I lick feet.
Just thought you all should know.

And some of the people I know probably should get out more. Seriously. George has no pop culture knowledge and no common sense and no observational skills. This man did not know how football was played and it had to be explained to him in very stupid terms.

Oh yeah, because I can't get the letters o' rec in on time, so not applying Franklin and Marshall. Whoops.

Date:	2004-01-31 23:26
Subject:	Soooo.
Security:	Public
Mood:	tired

I did chores this morn, school was kinda boring last week, but a paper came out. I had one small article.

After chores, went to meet Danielle. That was strange. She was nice, but I would have preferred it immensely had not her mother, my parents, her two sisters and cousin been there, and mall had been more familiar to me.
Still, was interesting. Had lunch, wandered around. Talked. Played a bit of gap tag. Almost won, but got mouthed "hi" and I lost.
Then, she had to go, so I walked her to her car, and we talked, waiting for her mom to come around, and we exhanged underwear flashes. That was amusing.
Oh, I dragged her into suncoast and purchased A Clockwork Orange.
Then, I drove back, and as I got closer to home, I got less nervous and more bouncy, and more normal, then I called a few people, got home, walked the dog, and bounced off to Kim's birthday party.
There we talked a bit, scared the new girl, Hillary, with the clown pinata, then it got the crap kicked out of it. Then Kim opened presents, and we talked more, and then we went in and watched Rocky Horror Picture Show, and I put on a little performance during Sweet Transvestite.

Something might get going tomorrow, as superbowl related or not. Dunno.
So tired.

Date:	2004-01-29 23:14
Subject:
Security:	Public
Mood:	tired

So...Submitted Fasfa, umm, missed Lawrence, sad about that. NCAL starting up, Econ is strange, I like my hair. might meet Danielle Saturday. entertained her and proved to her mom I'm not some freaky pedophile or something via webcam.
Susan is wonderful to talk to and I am sad I didn't apply to Lawrence. Will apply to Franklin and Marshall though.

's all.

12 hrs at school blows.
So tired.
The joint muscle where my left arm and my pectoral muscle meet hurts. Dunno why.

TIRED.

Was sick all day. But got better a bit thanks to food and alka-seltzer.

Will go to school tomorrow, for musket.
Got Dogma and the Crow, watched Dogma. Intriguing movie that. I rather liked it, but it seems as time goes on, the dialogue of Kevin Smith movies gets less and less smooth, despite having many of the same actors.
Tried to sleep, didn't work, surf the net, eat, do some homework, then printing and such. Yayup.

Updated my webpage, haven't done that since april, and there's little to no new content. Wow.

Date:	2004-01-25 20:16
Subject:	Media
Security:	Public
Mood:	sick

So, it's awards time. Indeed, it is. It's that time of year when the Emmys, the Golden Globes, the Oscars, the Spirit Awards, and a myriad of other film, and the occasional music awards. (The Grammys are somewhere, but then who cares. EVERYONE has a grammy.)
Me, writing a reviews nearly every single time I can for the school newspaper and an advocate for good film, am excited. It seems I'll have some catchin up to do that will be credible, since last year I saw 3/5 of the best picture nominations, I wish to the whole five, and basically everything else nominated for this year, so I can whine bitch and complain or cheer a good choice. That, and seeing these sorts of things is just a good idea.
Nominations are announced Tuesday, and I'm rather anxious. Sundance happened too, and while I probably won't be able to get ahold of those for a while, I hope to get around to delving into the more independent film, seeing as it's often more pure and worthy of viewing than some of the absolute shit that gets put out by Hollywood.
Sex and Lucia, Postman Blues, Ghost World, Y tu mama tambien, Igby Goes Down, and anything by Stephen Lynch comes to my mind as things that aren't hollywood, but are still god damned wonderful films.

There's literature here too, somewhere in my head, but it doesn't want to come out.
Mmmfilm.

Date:	2004-01-25 19:56
Subject:	What. The Fuck. Body.
Security:	Public
Mood:	sick

How the fuck did I get sick? No seriously, WHAT THE FUCK DID I DO?
I woke up Satruday, my throat was a bit irritated, but I figured what was from singing my way through Rocky.
Go, take the SAT II, that was nice and easy come back, poke around a bit, and then finished off the Graduate.
Odd movie that, I had a hard time watching it because I could see myself doing something like that.
Then, I got up, went to go see if anything needed doing, then sat down and watched Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon.
Holy Shit, the Cinematography was wonderful, everything was fluid, it was just wow.
Then, I sort of got out of my chair, took the dog for a walk, that sort of thing, ate and waht not, came back, posted on R&M and bit, and then Bam, Megan calls me.

I don't believe I've mentioned Megan before, she's awonderfully odd and random girl, who's a year below me. She's in the whole Drumline and band deal, and her mind sort of works like mine does. Really fast and really oddly.
She was excessively hyper and planned on scaring me, since she dug up my number from somebody. So, we talked for a bit, and she requested that I sing, so I sang for about 90 minutes, which was intersperesed with conversation.
Then I realized I was going to be fucked up today, cause I felt like shit, so I went to bed.

Wake up, feeling like shit, and took a nice long shower, and then got in pajamas, and settled down to read "The Meaning of Everything, The Story of the Oxford English Dictionary" by Simon Winchester, who some one,either Rissa or Ryan mentioned one of his other books, the Professor and the Madman.
I'm 2/3's of the way through it, and it's an interesting read, but never have I seen so much cirriculum where I could say when it was I learned that. (Zero period this year, actually. Samuel Johnson, Portmanteau words, Erudite, and the history of the English Islands stand out in my mind.) It's insane.
I'll probably finish this up this evening, and I have no idea what I'll do tomorrow, being that I'm sick, and will probably remain sick on my day off. If I feel better, I think I'll mug some movies from Jack, or finally get around to finishing Crime and Punishment or 2001 a Space Odyssey.

Coming up: Media Rant.

Date:	2004-01-23 22:03
Subject:	Now for thoughtful time
Security:	Public
Mood:	pessimistic

Another moral dilemma, brought to you by Brandon Lueken enterprises.

I was actually reminded of my plight by Rissa, who mentioned her acquaintence Jack Daniels.
This brings to forfront one of the more interesting choices of my life.
You see, I'm going to a Liberal College, and I am for Reed, the top of the top in Liberal College land.
Now, Liberal colleges breed, guess what, liberal thinkers, and the liberal thinkers, as I see, seem to be chacterized by a greater tolerance for many things. Race, Age, Thoughts, and other things like Drugs and Alcohol.
Well, I'm about one of the most honest people you'll ever meet, and fairly mild mannered. My parents don't seem to even believe how clean I am.
It's true that I've never smoked, never done drugs, never had sex, and never drank alcohol. I'm not even really all that flirty when you get right down to it, or when it seems like I am, usually it's just a sexual trend in my humor.
The Liberal Lifestyle, it seems, is one of drug, sex, and alcohol, all while being able to think clearly. I worry about this because I have an addictive personality. I fear greatly what these things can do to a person, and I've got horrible tales of what it has done to people. My parents warn of the dangers of alcohol from their own experiences ("It'll say it's your best friend, but it lies. It'll tell you that lampshade looks really good on your head, but it doesn't. It'll say it looks better with no clothes, but it's lying.") and I know smoking is dangerous. Drugs are also not only dangerous to a degree, but also illegal. (I know they're dangerous, I've watched my friend Wes got from not using anything to using herb, to using a variety of fun pills in about seven months.)
So, I know, going to a liberal school, especially if I go to Reed which is in the Downtown Portland, these things will be there.

I worry about even lasting that long, as many of my friends do a variety of those things which they wish to inflict upon myself, even if it means kidnapping me.

I worry for two reasons, or two outcomes really. I suppose it is the search of humanity. Classifying as a human, a true, existing person that does something meaningful with their lives, makes their marks on History. A Shakesspeare, a Malcom X, a Charles Martel, a Ghandi, a Julius Ceaser, an Alexander the Great, an Abraham Lincoln, a Napoleon, a Genghis Khan. I want to leave my mark on history, but the way there seems to be through a liberal life style, which seems to be laden with pitfalls of not even getting off the ground, not doing much of anything, doing good things and never getting the word out, or just burning out in a ultra-fast lifestyle that is percieved to be "true living," through a cloud of substances.

Of course, my pursuit of living begs the question "what is living" and have I really lived, can I really understand until I've been there? Am I capable of that, despite an addictive personality? Because, if I don't, I know the stories of countless burn outs, of old druggies, or frustrated middle class alcoholics who have the 2.5 children, the wife, the waffle iron, the golden retriever, the alcohol, and in moments of shame, mentally torture and physically abuse those people.

I suppose that's what's getting me down, because I know I have things to do for college, I know I have to submit the Fafsa still, check up on if everything has been recieved, send some last requests, take the last test, the continue on my way, and do well in school still, and college means life, and life gets me questioning, and that gets me thinking, and that gets me here

In line with that, is that I know drugs, alcohol and smoking aren't the only things a person can get addicted to. I also fear getting addicted to sex, becuase, from what I've been able to tell thus far, I'm a fairly sexual person, although I suppose I won't truly know until I've actually done it.

So..that's what's been on my mind.

And I just got yelled at for not telling my parents about my SAT II test tomorrow. Damn.

Date:	2004-01-23 21:51
Subject:	Friday
Security:	Public
Mood:	discontent

I 'unno when I last updated, I unno when I'll update again, but I do know that I've been reading entries, just not posting.
I've been feeling anti-social, and currently depressed, but can't place exactly why.
I got in a little tiff with Danielle, but that's passed. Ummm.
I did my pamphlets for Ernest, took his final which was long and tedious. Turek's final was fun, because I had to find a copy of the Iliad and then type 3-5 pages, like everybody else. They all don't take the class so seriously, while I really value what Turek says but I'll get a C in the class because I never did my work, although I had full intentions of doing it, but didn't mainly because I was fucking around on the computer.
Today, despite not having classes, I went to school, but had trouble getting there, because my back tire on my bike decided not to go straight and grind on the holder thing. That pisses me off.

I have the last SAT II tomorrow. Bugger. It's only Math though and one test at that.
Got to test out Pong, that was cool. Works and everything. Four player Pong is crazy.

Broke Matt and David in for Rocky, and video games remain boring. I continue to lack faith in the ability of a video game to tell a story, especially an RPG.
Finals are over...and I feel like reading, sort of, but will go to sleep eventually.
I've been having really nice and vivid dreams lately, but can't seem to remember many.

Nursing the Frank dress up again for Graduation. They'll even give me money. Lots of it.
Jack owes me three movies, and I have two on my computer. I do believe I'll enrich my mind with film and literature this weekend, and no school monday, that that'll be nice.

Date:	2004-01-20 22:30
Subject:	Friends
Security:	Public
Mood:	thoughtful

Something I noticed today is about the people I have on my livejournal friends list. I've got people I actually care about, and people I read about out of amusement. I've got people from two different habitations, and a few I've picked up just from LJ. I'm in three communities, and the ages range from mid-late twenties to about 13 or 14. In truth, the people I liked to read the most about are those who don't post in their journals all that often or do so after wrapping up a day.
Ben is a person who just generalky posts at odd intervals in the day, goes out, is social, maintains a job and is fairly active. He's a fairly upbeat guy and he's a lot of fun to read.
That's just one. Sven,Rissa, and Heidi are all people I look forward to reading, because they're postitive and interesting people.
It makes me wonder, because there are other people I enjoy reading, but they don't seem to be all that positive. Infact, truth be told, a lot of the people I have on my list probably have some serious problems (mental, emotional, otherwise), and it causes me to ponder about myself.
To which category do I really fall into? Or is two categories sufficient? There's a group of people who are mixed, Mags and Susan stand out there.
I know I just don't bitch, but I don't post random things I find on the internet, and I do go up and down, but it provokes thought that I could realistically be living the lives that I find so interesting on the web.
I'm sort of left with guilt (unfinished projects, severing contacts with people whom I have no other contact with but the web, losing things), but really in exchange for living to my full potential, is it a worthy trade off, or is this something close to my full potential?
I do believe I'd like to find out, but habits are indeed, hard to break.

Date:	2004-01-20 22:18
Subject:	Past few days
Security:	Public
Mood:	calm

Talked with Leah for a few hours, and she got to pay for that. I meandered in conversation, and she didn't say much, but I think I did my job.
Went to sleep, woke up, puttered about and then Wes showed up at my door. We went out to the Hot Java Cafe, and I got to observe the people there, whom he references in stories. I was greeted with "I'll give you head for food," by a very attractice girl, who despite me giving her food, only took a little because he boyfriend then arrived. I did get a kiss on the cheek though.
The Cafe was interesting and a bit cold, and some what enlightening. That's sort of personal though. Wes broke his hookah at the end of the night, which bummed him out.
My parents, who know that Wes partakes in some illegal drug activity, questioned me on my lateness, when in truth we never really kept track of time, despite it getting late.
Then I did my notecard, which leads into today, where I did an essay, read in Gov, debated a bit in Humanities, got angry when I learned my English grade (currently a borderline B), will get shot to shit because I didn't do any (read one for the other teacher, which I failed miserably on) so instead of a low B, I'll have a low C, because it's a weighted grade. I was trying to avoid that, but got fucked. My own fault
Jack owes me even more, so I get another movie rental from his stash (around 400 movies, all DVD's, even more tapes) after selecting Heathers and Dark City, for correcting finals in 6th period.

Listened to Bush talk blah, angered me in his closeminded ways (socialised health care and gay marriage) but I had things to do. Studied for Psych a bit, and tomorrow, I get to write an essay or two. Grah. And a pamphlet. Oh dear.
Oh shit, and the SAT II on Saturday morning, but that'll be over by like 9:30. Then I'll probably spend a good fat amount of time at Jack's, checking out this pong game, and breaking Matt and David into Rocky. ehehehehehe. Audience Participation.

Date:	2004-01-19 00:20
Subject:
Security:	Public
Mood:	accomplished

Did lots of chores, laundry, cleaning room, change sheets, that sort of thing. My mother got an urnish thing for my grandfather, and all evening I've been online. Downloading the graduate and crouching tiger hidden dragon. Been on a movie kick all evening.
Need to write a paper (or three) tomorrow, for a variety of classes, on my day off.

Danielle is wonderful, and consoling Leah makes me think. Been sort of introspective, as I sort of browsed R&M and didn't find much happy or interesting.

Watched a little football with the twins, and it'll be the Patriots and the Panthers. Go Panthers.

That's all I really have to say, I dread the work tomorrow. I'll be up as long as Leah is.