Portrait of a Cereal Spiller

Dear LJ Account

Thu, 10 Sep 2009 23:19:43 GMT

What can I say? We've shared laughter and tears, but I'm sorry to say - it's not you, it's me. I feel like I've grown and our relationship is not the vibrant thing it once was. People have told me I should go out with the younger, faster Dreamwidth or that town bike Facebook. I'm sorry LJ, But I'm not leaving you for them. I'm leaving you because of you.

To those friends in common who may feel awkward because LJ and I are not going to see each other any more, I would say, don't feel bad, I am still contactable in the usual ways, it's just that LJ will not be one of them.

And boy did that metaphor get dull quickly. In a nutshell, I am essentially shutting down my LJ in a couple of days. I'm going to keep one or two people on the flist, and probably lock any future posts as purely private. If you've been looking for a good time to jump on the ditch Mike from the flist bandwagon, this is your chance.

And now I'm off to charge my Black Lantern ring...

Something that made me think about Big Ideas

Thu, 27 Aug 2009 23:13:36 GMT

So I got a link to this on the New Matilda site from my Twitter acct;
http://newmatilda.com/2009/08/27/new-leftwing-patriot

A lot of the discussion of left-leaning thinkers fleeing Australia during the Howard years struck home pretty hard - after all, I was weighing up Canada and New Zealand pretty seriously.

What made me think is the central discussion of a new left patriotism and what that would look like.

I think the main fear of constructing such a model comes, quite rightly from the fear that patriotism is a dirty word among the left.

Perhaps to kick off building such a model, I would like to put forward a couple of ideas;

• Australia is the nation we were born in or have emigrated to, to live in for the foreseeable future.
• As a result, we are committed to making this place we live in the best place possible for ourselves and the people we share the country with.
• We cannot subscribe to a definition of being Australian that excludes people whose idea may vary slightly from what is falsely perceived as 'the norm', instead we must commit to a model that actively encourages debate, synthesis of our ideas into a common approach, and recognition that we will never agree on everything.
• We must also encourage a model that respects our global neighbours in the same manner we seek to respect ourselves. We may never agree on some issues, but we must recognise that we share a planet with these people, and must seek to do the best we can and hope others follow our example.
• As we are populated by a fusion of cultures we must recognise that many of these values will clash and almost never agree on particular issues. Despite this, we must encourage a shared belief that all men and women, of all ethnicities, of all sexualities, of every age, are citizens of this nation and this planet. We are all equal, no one is deserving of either undue discrimination or preferential treatment.
• We recognise that our history is a work in progress. We have made mistakes, and continue to make them. We should not idolise all of our history as sacrosanct, but instead view the nation's history as sometimes stumbling steps along a path to betterment of our nation. There are values we should rightly be proud of, but many others we should have the courage to critique, revile or atone for as relevant.
• This in turn means we should not tie ourselves to any particular foreign nation as sharing our values. Alliances of the past are just that. We are not English, though we have citizens of English ancestry. We are not American, no matter how indebted we may be to their assistance in the battle of the Coral Sea. If we choose to aid these nations, it is only if they embark on a venture that shares our values. We will not make war on another nation, simply because we share some historical ties to the instigator of the war. We will make new alliances and review old ones. We should always view any political tie to another nation as recognition that they share our values of openness, progress, equality and the preservation of the best elements of social and ecological health.
• 'The Battler' is not a figure representative of noble struggle, but a characiture of an oppressed, struggling citizen trying to make the best of a bad situation entirely out of their control. We can all sympathise with this character, but must recognise that when we see a 'battler' we see someone trapped in a situation that needs to be fixed, rather than masochistically sanctifying an awful state of affairs. Australia was born out of hardship. We therefore recognise that we, more than any other Western industrialised nation, have an especial duty to ameliorate or end hardship when we see it.

Just some ideas. Any thoughts on how we should define a leftist patriotism?

Thu, 23 Jul 2009 00:20:11 GMT

Feeling completely blank lately, seeing much as futile, hard to get interested in or excited by much.

Not good.

an open letter

Wed, 15 Apr 2009 03:39:52 GMT

To the various online sub-human trolls bashing Alan Moore for being a hypocrite...

I don't know if your mother taught you this when you were just a wee baby troll, but there's a thing called integrity. Some people have this quality, which prevents them from getting involved in something they dislike or believe to be unethical.

Integrity takes many forms, but one sample form that has surfaced recently, is of an English comics writer, who doesn't happen to like modern film. This fellow wrote a comic published over 20 years ago by a publishing monolith. This fellow had a falling out with the monolith over their reversion cause stipulation, which says THEY OWN what he wrote and a colleague illustrated UNLESS they stop publishing it, which they HAVEN'T done in over 20 years. Thinking that this kind of reversion clause is exploitative and refusing to work with them again - integrity.

It is the monolith who approved a film to be made, it is the monolith who will earn the lion's share of royalties, and it is the monolith who retain the rights to the original work, as the film has prompted a new flurry of reprints, and associated memorabilia. The original writer had no say in the adaptation to film, nor the screenplay, nor the design, and has no rights to the film product at all, thus receives no kickback from it.

Thinking that the film - entertaining though it is - misses the central point of your original story, and that Hollywood films are kind of for dumb people, is NOT being hypocritical - it is expressing an opinion. There's a difference. Ask your parents or carers if you are still uncertain.

In the final analysis - shut up. Until you are an award-winning recognised genius, having YOUR graphic novels aggressively pursued by Hollywood producers for adaptation, you are in no position to lend an authoritative opinion. If Grant Morrison or Neil Gaiman called Alan Moore a hypocrite, I would listen and consider their rationale. But Idiot McIdiot from the trollosphere's opinion sits a bit lower on my scale.

Watchmen

Mon, 30 Mar 2009 03:29:24 GMT

Finally saw Watchmen on Sunday arvo. Finally saw what everyone has been going on about as regards sex and violence.

Not going to give anything away about the film (in case someone here hasn't seen it yet), but a couple of thoughts;

• Sex: It was not sexier than I thought it was going to be. Nothing in the film was absent in the GN. It probably was a little less discreetly shadowed than the GN, but nothing too different.
• Violence: The violence surpassed the comic greatly, and in one particular scene, I found it out of character (Laurie and Dan ambushed by the KT's). Having seen much worse in other films however, I didn't think it very over the top.
• History: I really dug their approach to history - seeing not just Nixon, but Kissinger, Kennedy, Iacocca, Pat Buchanan and other figures from the recent decades of history was nicely grounding. The montage in the beginning, flashing through key points in Watchmen world history was really cool, and I think nicely set the tone for the rest of the film.
• Costumes/Characters: The main characters are pretty much note-perfect with their comic counterparts, particularly Dan Dreiberg/Nite Owl II, Walter Kovacs/Rorschach and Eddie Blake/The Comedian. I preferred some of the costume updates, especially with Laurie/Silk Spectre and Adrian Veidt/Ozymandias. Go back to the GN and compare if you are in doubt, those were some baaaaad costumes. And Bubastis made it into the film. Yay!
• The End: It is different in execution, though not intent, to the GN. In many ways I found the film take much more likely than the ending of the GN. For those who worry the point of the GN's ending might be lost in the film - you have nothing to worry about. As I said, the intent of the original ending is still intact. The way it is obtained is somewhat different, and is I think, a much more logical ending.

All up? I enjoyed it. Was it worth the wait of approx. 20 years? Maybe not, but I enjoyed it none the less, and will likely snaffle it up on DVD when it is released.

stuff

Sun, 22 Mar 2009 06:56:36 GMT

No houses this weekend - all a bit blah and too expensive. And nearly died wandering around in the horrible heat.

Beers, comics and nerdiness afterwards with some chums - all good.

Cleaned out the garage a bit today. Helpful rubbish collection guy carted off heaps of our unwanted shit in about 20 mins. We can see the floor in our garage now. Awesome.

Missed whit3nois3 because I was (and still am) feeling like crap from horrible office cold that just keeps dragging on.

Getting nervous about finding a house in time. Lease is up 18th May, which leaves just enough time for finding a place, sorting finance, and settlement. Oh and maybe moving.

eeeek!

Quake

Wed, 18 Mar 2009 23:10:16 GMT

So yesterday's tremor was apparently a pretty big quake all things considered;
http://au.news.yahoo.com/a/-/mp/5407447/tremors-follow-melbourne-quakes/

scary scary

Wed, 18 Mar 2009 05:33:11 GMT

hey, a second tremor! That's two in what, two weeks?

Tue, 17 Mar 2009 04:41:03 GMT

So hanging for a guinness or a murphy's about now. If I close my eyes I can almost taste it...

shlurp shlurp

mmmmmmmmmm

Some common sense

Mon, 16 Mar 2009 05:11:39 GMT

Parents do not take children to Friday the 13th - it contains nudity and scenes of grotesque violence AS YOU'D EXPECT FROM A FILM ABOUT A SERIAL KILLER.

Parents do not take children to see The Watchmen - it contains rape and scenes of grotesque violence AS YOU'D EXPECT FROM A FILM ADAPTATION OF AN ADULT ORIENTED GRAPHIC NOVEL.

Come on, please, don't be teh dumb.

Assholes of the world, Part 1: Debbie Schlussel

Fri, 06 Mar 2009 10:43:30 GMT

By now it should come as no surprise that white christian Anne-Coulter-a-likes piss me off. Overly mechanistic reviews of fiction also piss me off, and people who compare adult graphic novels with Archie comics also piss me off. Now these traits have been combined in one person here;

http://www.debbieschlussel.com/archives/2009/03/the_watchmen_li.html

The review of Watchmen by a woman who seems to be Anne Coulter's secret twin.

I do not deny that the story contains all the unsavoury and horrible things she mentions. Why should I? It is her overly mechanistic reading of the story that annoys me. In her review technique, James Dean's 'Giant' is just about being rich, and 'Star Wars' is about galactic terrorism, with Luke Skywalker cast as a very whitebread Osama Bin Laden. I do not expect her to like the story. In fact I would expect less than 10% of society as a whole to like it. I DO expect her as a reviewer to be able to read disparate events in a narrative as each contributing to a broader theme. Watchmen is about fear, plain and simple. Fear of the enemy, fear of what you can do, fear of the world around you. It is about overcoming fear, about being devoured by it, about allowing fear to unite people. On that level I'd expect a white right-wing christian to appreciate the story, as it describes so much of their lives and tactics.

Debbie Schlussel I salute you. Just when I think people are wonderful, deep, rich and complex, you come along and prove that some people are just complete assholes.

Mon, 23 Feb 2009 02:15:37 GMT

Back on the treadmill...

In case anyone is in any doubt...

Wed, 28 Jan 2009 04:14:07 GMT

I am NOT under 18.

To prove it:
- I remember episodes 4-6 of star wars, and saw them at the cinema, AND remember that Han shot first, and that you could see right through snowspeeders.
- Logan's Run still fills me with existential angst.
- I thought Tron looked high-tech.
- I remember when all Smurfs were adults and male.
- The cheapest paddlepop I ever bought was vanilla, and it cost 15 cents.
- I remember the original 8 character line-up for Masters of the Universe (Good: He-Man, Man-At-Arms, Teela, Stratos. Evil: Skeletor, Beast Man, Mer-Man. Neutral: Zodak.)
- I remember when Bob Hawke was Prime Minister, instead of a sad old alcoholic.
- I did the last year of HSC.
- My Doctor was Tom Baker. I even remember seeing Pat Troughton re-runs.
- MY HAIR IS FUCKING GREY!!!

The Aussie meme

Sat, 24 Jan 2009 23:53:19 GMT

Am I Aussie as? I guess I'll find out...

Bold'em if you've done'em.

1. Heard a kookaburra in person
2. Slept under the stars
3. Seen a koala.
4. Visited Melbourne
5. Watched a summer thunderstorm
6. Worn a pair of thongs
7. Been to Uluru (Ayer's Rock).
8. Visited Cape York
9. Held a snake
10. Sang along with Khe San (when I was drunk too)
11. Drank VB
12. Visited Sydney
13. Have seen a shark
14. Have used Aussie slang naturally in a conversation
15. Had an actual conversation with an indigenous Australian (aboriginal).
16. Eaten hot chips from the bag at the beach
17. Walked/climbed over the Sydney Harbour Bridge
18. Used an outside dunny, and checked under the seat before sitting down
19. Seen Chloe in Young & Jackson's.
20. Slept on an overnight train or bus
21. Been to Sydney's Mardi Gras
22. Have gone bush-bashing
23. Taken a sickie
24. Been to see a game of Aussie Rules football
25. Have seen wild camels
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Had a Tim Tam Slam
28. Ridden in a tram in Melbourne
29. Been at an ANZAC day Dawn Service.
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Held a wombat
32. Been on a roadtrip of 800km or more
33. Seen the Great Australian Bight in person
34. Had a really bad sunburn
35. Visited an aboriginal community (have driven through one though)
36. Seen a redback spider
37. Have watched Paul Hogan
38. Seen Blue Poles in person
39. Wandered barefoot in the bush
40. Eaten Vegemite
41. Thrown a boomerang
42. Seen the Kimberlies
43. Given a hitch-hiker a lift
44. Been to Perth
45. Have tried Lemon, Lime and Bitters
46. Tried playing a didgeridoo
47. Seen dinosaur footprints
48. Eaten Tim Tams
49. Been to Darwin
50. Touched a kangaroo
51. Visted the Great Barrier Reef
52. Listened to Kevin Bloody Wilson
53. Killed a Cane Toad
54. Gone to a drive-in theatre
55. Have read and own books by Australian authors... not sure...
56. Visited Adelaide
57. Know the story behind "Eternity"
58. Been camping
59. Visited Brisbane
60. Been in an outback pub
61. Know what the term "Waltzing Matilda" actually means
62. Gone whale watching
63. Listened to Slim Dusty
64. Own five or more Australian movies or TV series. All dodgy ones - Harlequin, Howling III: The Marsupials, Thirst, Chances, probably something else a bit higher up on the taste scale somewhere...
65. Sang along to Down Under (also when drunk)
66. Have stopped specifically to look at an historic marker by the side of the road.
67. Eaten a 4'n'20 pie (a long time ago)
68. Surfed at Bondi - No. I do not go poo-surfing.
69. Watched the cricket on Boxing Day
70. Visited Hobart
71. Eaten kangaroo
72. Seen a quokka
73. Visited Canberra
74. Visited rainforests
75. Used a Victa lawnmower
76. Travelled on a tram in Adelaide
78. Used a Hills hoist
79. Visited the Olgas
80. Used native Australian plants in cooking
81. Visited the snow
82. Chosen a side in Holden VS Ford
83. Visited the desert
84. Been water skiing
85. Read The Phantom
86. Visited Parliament House - not the new one but I saw the old one recently.
87. Gone spotlighting or pig-shooting
88. Crossed the Nullarbor
89. Avoided swimming in areas because of crocodiles
90. Listened to AC/DC
91. Called someone a dag
92. Voted in a Federal Election
93. Have been swimming and stayed between the flags
94. Had a possum in your roof
95. Visited the outback
96. Travelled over corrugated roads.
97. Hit a kangaroo while driving
98. Been well outside any mobile phone coverage
99. Seen an emu.
100. Have woken to the smell of bushfires

I am only 61% Aussie. Ah the shame...

And Lo…

Tue, 06 Jan 2009 23:08:39 GMT

I beheld a white horse and he that sat on him was Death, and beside him rode his fellow horsemen; yellow and shivering Plague, red and bestial War, sickly pale Famine, and some jerk in a suit promising shit he couldn't deliver called Advertising.

And lo did they ravage the world of man, except Advertising who had to reschedule the Apocalypse because of a Work In Progress (WIP) meeting.

The vampires in Twilight sparkle in sunlight, not burn

Sat, 29 Nov 2008 02:28:00 GMT

THEY FUCKING WHAT!!??!! ARE THEY TAKING THE FUCKING PISS??!!

Ok horror indignation aside, let's do a snap poll.

When a vampire is caught out in the sunlight, it should;
a) Shriek in an unearthly fashion, crisp, burn or explode.
b) Shield their undead gaze from the harsh light of their enemy the sun. OR
c) Become all bright and sparkly because it's so sweet and enchanting and beautiful.

Okay Twilight you just made THE LIST.

Inland Empire

Fri, 28 Nov 2008 02:14:49 GMT

V and I watched David Lynch's most recent film 'Inland Empire' last night. People love or hate DL, and usually it's because of the perceived lack of plot in his films. Inland Empire was the most challenging and certainly the darkest DL film I've ever seen. I think Eraserhead looked like Gigli by comparison. Something has occurred to me today though. While I am still struggling to tie up bits of the film in my head, I am struck by the fact that I had to work for this film, and work hard, to keep up. Rather than finding this frustrating, I find it entirely refreshing. I cannot get people who call themselves movie fans, but just want to be entertained, and not think (like some of the people I work with). I find the reverse true. If an Adam Sandler flick doesn't need you to think - it's just an impersonal exercise in mindlessness - why bother watching it? Everyone can agree what a Ben Stiller film is about. I can't find two people on the whole internet who agree what IE was about.

In a nutshell, Inland Empire is a story that happens around 4 times to different people, at different times, in largely the same way. Some of it is real, some of it fiction and some a bizarre combination of the two. If you could easily comprehend Lost Highway, and managed to crack Mulholland Drive, then step up to the honours stream and try out Inland Empire.

The internet and the Australian Government

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 22:50:08 GMT

You've all heard of the Govt's proposed internet filter plan, forcing ISP's to adopt some half-assed block to prevent the wee lil chilluns getting their hands on hardcore dvda swedish donkeyporn.

It won't work, will slow down your precious internets and stop you going to otherwise legitimate sites that get accidentally blocked.

Herr Kommandant K-Rudd's Kronies will also be able to add blacklisted sites to the filter, no doubt based on their nebulously defined morals.

GetUp have a petition going at www.getup.org.au/campaign/SaveTheNet

So, even if you are not a big fan of porn, goatse and tubgirl, but care about free access to online information, do everyone a favour and sign the petition.

I like that I actually received messages from two other folk to sign the petition before I even got the official msg from GetUp. Shows that people care I guess.

The Christmas meme, re-written for my new holiday Zombiemas

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 02:52:36 GMT

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags?
Wrapping of any kind is discouraged. All gifts are practical implements for putting down the undead and must be ready to be used at a second's notice.

2. Real tree or Artificial?
Zombiemas discourages trees as well, they just provide unwanted cover for stealthy zombies.

3. When do you put up the tree?
See 2.

4. When do you take the tree down?
Any extant trees are usually destroyed in the firefight that ensues once the stealthy zombie is discovered.

5. Do you like eggnog?
Strangely yes, but not too much.

6. Favourite gift received as a child?
The black and decker 40" diamond tooth blade chainsaw I used to take down my first roaming revenant.

7. Hardest person to buy for?
No-one. 12 gauge solid shot is the gift that keeps on giving.

8. Easiest person to buy for?
See 7.

9. Do you have a nativity scene?
Sometimes Resident Evil action figures are placed instead of a nativity scene.

10. Mail or email Zombiemas cards?
Zombiemas tries not to rely on the postal service, it is usually the first thing to collapse in a Rise. Zombiemas founders use a secure server for emails stored in the central Zombiemas bunker.

11. Worst Zombiemas gift you ever received?
An Ingram Mac 10. It's heavy recoil makes it unwieldy for headshots.

12. Favourite Zombiemas Movie?
Dawn of the Dead (original).

13. When do you start shopping for Zombiemas?
It's never too early to be prepared for Zombiemas. Acquisition of provisions should be frequent and attentive.

14. Have you ever recycled a Zombiemas present?
It's a Zombiemas tradition to pass on tried and true close combat weapons to the young 'uns - crowbars and machetes are common.

15. Favourite thing to eat at Zombiemas?
Tinned goods, Scotch and cigarettes are traditional Zombiemas favourites.

16. Lights on the tree?
No, it would alert revenants to your position.

17. Favourite Zombiemas song?
It's Catching Up by Nomeansno.

18. Travel at Zombiemas or stay home?
Travel is only advised if you are low on ammunition or provisions.

19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer?
Bitey, Chompy, Slimy, Flamey, Weepy, Spewy, Stenchy and Severed.

20. Angel on the tree top or a star?
If you must have a tree, a remote-triggered incendiary device makes a good decoration.

21. Open the presents Zombiemas Eve or morning?
Whenever immediately required.

22. Most annoying thing about this time of the year?
The commercialisation - grenade print ties, 'my first kill' greeting cards - all the spirit has gone out of Zombiemas.

23. Favourite ornament theme or colour?
Functional destructive utilisation is the best theme.

24. Favourite memory of Zombiemas?
The time about 20 ghouls triggered the claymores around the compound. Smelled like roast chicken.

25. What do you want for Zombiemas this year?
More filthy brainsuckers in the ground where they belong.

Insert generic season greeting here

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 02:02:20 GMT

I don't know if it's just me getting older, or my continuing embrace of all things atheistic, but Christmas seems to mean less and less to me every year. I was thinking though about all the trappings - tree, presents, turkey, carols etc. Who came up with all of this. How did we end up with the incomprehenisble pastiche of commercialism, religion and unquestioned tradition we have now? People say 'I'm not religious, but I still love Christmas' but it's called CHRIST-mas. Would you still celebrate it if it was called Mohammedmas?

With this in mind, I thought why not create your own (seasonal festivity that used to be called Christmas). I thought such an attempt should address the following;

• Time of year/season: What should the weather be like on your festival?
• How is it celebrated: Do you exchange gifts, eat, get pissed, spin like a dervish?
• Does it venerate anyone/anything: Jesus, Alfred E Neuman, Douglas Adams, the assassination of JFK?
• Set dressing: How is your festival coloured and decorated, sombre sepias, day-glo-yellow, tie-die purple, tinsel, incense sticks, lines of coke?

So I created this sample holiday;
Zombiemas
• Occurs around the same time as Christmas, when the year is warm and I am sick of working with blank-eyed jacktards. I'm going to choose December 25, because I think this baby is a winner and can give Christmas a run for its money.
• Participants relieve 12 months of shit and stress with the ceremonial binge of junk food, booze and an endless showing of zombie movies.
• It venerates the blank indifference of the universe to the travails of man and the unquestioned genius of George Romero, Lucio Fulci and other carrion-purveyors.
• The room is lovingly decorated with fake blood, limbs and skulls, as well as toy chainsaws and shotguns. The colour tone is generally black/red. Black and red cloth is draped liberally around the room to make it look spooky.
• Gifts are not exchanged by habit, except if you want to. It is customary to allow either the host, or people named Michael, full and unrestricted access to your booze and fags.

well it's (nearly) official

Wed, 05 Nov 2008 04:31:01 GMT

Obama seems to have won;

posted just this sec off the Beeb;

Electoral College votes
Winning post 270
Obama - Democrat 333
McCain - Republican 155

Congressional Results: Senate
Party Seats
Democrat 53
Republican 39

House of Representatives
Party Seats
Democrat 184
Republican 118

I, meanwhile will celebrate today not as 'Yay Obama's won Day' but rather 'Thank fuck Sarah Palin's not gonna be VP Day'. Already some are comparing Obama to our own KRudd - a warrior for do nothing mediocrity, waving a flag of vaguely left-leaning rhetoric.

Ah well, who cares eh? At least Palin's not VP. Open up the Bollinger eh?

Wasting time

Sun, 19 Oct 2008 23:32:31 GMT

Lego Batman for the Wii arrived Tuesday. Since then any spare moment I have found at home has been spent running around smacking goons into their component bricks.
Batman = awesome
Lego = awesome
Lego Batman = aweawesomesome

an idle thought, perhaps madness

Tue, 14 Oct 2008 02:46:27 GMT

Deities are exactly like Super Fund Providers - they are non-corporeal entities you make propitiation to, in order to ensure a comfortable future. If you believe one 'deity' isn't helping you, you switch devotion, ie 'rollover' to another.

Sun, 05 Oct 2008 22:08:14 GMT

Lego Batman arrives on the Wii in 9 days and counting.
Squeeee!

heh

Thu, 24 Jul 2008 03:37:58 GMT

from Crikey, the happiest thing to have come out of World Youth Day;

"It can take weeks to shoot a skateboarding video, as it's difficult to get the shot when security guards pounce if you're present for more than a couple of minutes. Noting that security guards seemed to ignore WYD pilgrims with skateboards, a professional skate crew signed up as pilgrims. Wearing their orange backpacks and neck tags, they were able to skate and film all over the CBD for as long as they liked."