i dont know what to think about anything anymore.
I listened to old school music yesterday and today and it made me happy.
Like Im sick of emo crap b.c all it does is depress me.But it lets me know that there are decent guys out there.
Sometimes I look at people and it truly makes me sad,how people are constantly searching for their identities.
I mean however low you wear your pants doesnt make you who you are.Neither does the tshirt on your back.Or the size jeans that sit around your waist.Yet we all struggle with this image.
Am I beautiful, and would you ever die to look liike me?the answer is probably no. I guess we all strive to lie to ourselves and tell ourselves we are beautiful.And if you answered yes to the question it also proves that once again insecurity rules.
I went and got sum contacts from the eye doctor bc mine were really dry and they had to give me the clear ones.But theres a problem..the clear ones give my eyes a greenish tint.I hate it.
I mean thats so superficial...its just frickin contacts mandie...yet people think my eyes are so beautiful and now I dont feel nearly as pretty.
Chinese food owns my life right now.
I hung out with Kristen last nite at her new apartment that is nice as crap.And her brother Alec.I havent hung out with those kids in a long ass time.It was so much fun.That is after I went and met my ex bf and his friends.
I dont really ever feel awkward around people and I didnt last nite either.But there was something about the way Matt looked at me.I really did break his heart.Its hard to talk to him knowing I did that to him.