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Oh, then theres the rest of us

The ones out here blowin' in the wind
Tryin' to find what we shoulda been
Makin' our choices hopin were right
Livin' on the prayers we say at night
Tryin' to out run the devil and the pain
Learnin' to live with what we cant change
God bless the rest of us

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Anim by: brennans

001. I meant to do this sooner, but well it took a little time. So, thanks for the memories, Lost. It's definitely been a pleasure AND a pain. It's taken me a while to sort through my feelings on the epic finale of Lost, because the spectacular journey that I took was so very different from the one that most of you all experienced. You guys got six wonderful years of heartaches, headaches, massive confusion (see: brain in a blender), and some very amazing characters and ships to come out of it. For me, this was a show that I did not expect to love as much as I did which came as quite a surprise to me.

In fact, I all but did EVERYTHING in my power to NOT like it and as you can see - it STILL DIDN'T work out that way. I just - I mean, how do you explain not being sure whether you'd care for a particular character much less like them in any possible capacity and in the end come to love them so fiercely?! Yes, I'm looking in Sawyer's direction mostly, because he just wowed me. And Jack, my brilliant and amazingly handsome Jack, who won my heart from the very beginning ended up showing me exactly why I was ALWAYS Team!Jack from the very beginning and why I believed in him so very much. His story mattered.

And you know something, it was pretty damn fantastic.

I wanted to tell my story of why I came to love this show as much as I did in pictures, but I've grown seriously lazy as of late and it would probably end up coming across as very bias as in it would mostly center around Jack Shephard, Kate Austen, Jack and Kate, Sawyer, Juliet, and Sawyer and Juliet with a side helping of my beloved Benry (for which there will be a HUGELY shaped Benry hole in my heart forever and ever - I'll always have you Ben) along with Sayid whom I mostly loved just because. So, instead I think I'll just hit on the highlights of the finale as best I can and just leave it at that for a little while, until I can process further.

I got everything out of this show that I really wanted, which was pretty much Locke being right all along and Jack finally acknowledging it and realizing that he needed all of them as much as they needed him, Jack and Kate (re: Kate actually being not only very likeable for the most part, but finally making a choice and sticking with it), Sawyer and Juliet, Jack and Sawyer parting on good terms on the island and then meeting up on good terms again in the afterlife they'd created for themselves, and Sayid realizing that he can be a good man and being somehow redeemed in his love for Shannon. Oh, and pretty much EVERYTHING about Charlie and Claire and baby jughead I mean Aaron - the closest thing we ever got to a nuclear family on the island.

I've been struggling with what my favorite scene was to come out of this grand epic finale, because there were so many good scenes and I'm pretty sure that most anyone who knows me probably thinks that it was shipper related but this time it really wasn't. As much as I absolutely LOVED the Jack/Kate scene on the island and the Sawyer/Juliet afterlife re-union, the scene that really stuck with me was Jack telling Smokey that he disrespects Locke's memory by wearing his face and that he wished he was there so he could tell him to his face that he was right along.

See, his story did matter.

Man, was Jack a believer this season and it was so beautiful to see. His story really came full circle. Plus, we get that scene where the camara pans down to where the light of the island is and we're looking right up at Jack and Smokey and it reminded me so much of the end of S1 when Jack and Locke found the hatch. I wrestle with this scene and the scene of Jack going back down to re-cork the island - more specifically the shot of him lying in the water, bathed in the light giggling. It was just so very beautifully shot.

Ships are nice to have and you're happy when whomever you like gets their moment, but in the end it was the characters - all of them - both together collectively and individually that really made me love this show. It was the stories that each of them had to tell, how they interacted with one another, the friendship and bonds that they created, and the way they fought, loved, died, and gave their lives to survive and live on to tell their stories or the way they chose to use being stranded on the island as a means of re-creating themselves and becoming a wholely other person than who they were before good or bad, it was their choice. That's what stays with me mostly, I think.

I don't want to gloat about which ship was or wasn't acknowledged, I just want to accept this series finale for what it was, and just be happy with that. We might not have gotten all of the answers that we wanted to get out of it, but in the end I think we did get what we needed the most which was the fact that the story had been about the character's, their relationships, and the journey that each of them took together with each other or alone individually. It might not have been the best series finale ever and have had its flaws, but it was done so beautifully that I can overlook that part because it touched me in a way that no series finale since Buffy the Vampire Slayer and E.R. has touched me and that's pretty much saying - A LOT.

So, thank you Lost for giving me two years and two and a half weeks of heartaches, jears, a broken brain, and a show that I was so determined NOT TO LOVE. It was one hell of a journey.

p.s. If, god forbid, I ever find myself stranded on some crazy ass island without so much as a damn clue on how to get off of it, I want a Hurley of my own to take care of me.

As I said before, my journey was a little more off the beaten path than yours, but somehow at the end of it all - I still feel sort of like my own brand of Lostie and I think I can totally be okay with that.

002. Ugh! Some of the people I work with are driving me bloody well insane. I cannot stand pettyness, ie. people talking about you amongst each other and you know they're doing doing it within earshot and it's like come on are we in fucking grade school or something?! Never mind the fact, that one of my actual co-worker's decided to take his bad day out on me Monday. I have enough to deal with, I do not want this bullshit. Stupid co-workers, stupid attitudes. Grow the frak up, please. Done now.

003. On Sunday morning around 9 o'clock in the morning I got a rather nice phone call from one of my aunt's informing me that another one of my aunt's had another heart attack (this would make the second one that she's had within a year) and it was apparently so bad that they had to care flight her to the nearest hospital, at that point she hadn't been seen by a doctor or anything but my aunt said that she'd probably have to have surgery. She did and they ended up putting five stints in her heart and we didn't find out about this until Monday, which was on my mind all day long even when the stupid co-worker was taking his stupid attitude out on me. (Did I mention that I sometimes, on rare occassion when it warrants it, don't really like people?!) Anyway, they took her off the ventilator that day and she was breathing on her own and doing pretty good, but my aunt said that she was still going to have to stay in the hospital for a few more days and of course she's going to be on more medication to monitor her heart. Crap, when it really hits - it just frakking hits at once.

004. Saw Sex and the City: The Movie 2 last Saturday and totally enjoyed the downtime to myself and the laughs. It wasn't as good as the first one, but it was still quite fantastic. I'll admit that I was a little bit worried when I saw he who shall not be named (even though I always liked him) in the trailers for the film, but I was completely IN LOVE with the way the movie ended. For me, it was pretty Big (you see what I did there? *g*) and quite perfect. I always knew that Samantha's sexual prowess would get her into trouble one day, here's what...it did. LOLZ.

Oh, and my favorite outfit that Carrie wore in the film just happened to be SJP's favorite outfit that she wore too. lolz. I kinda love it...a lot. ;)

005. OMG. I can't believe that the season finale for Glee is next week, I'm kinda REALLY EXCITED for it but I'm also kinda sad...do not want a summer hiatus. Oh, but my little shipper heart is just beating ninety to nothin'. ♥

006. I rented Tim Burton's Alice In Wonderland and I am gloriously in love with it. The costumes, the rich color vibrancy, the pretty and talented actors, and the set designs were just gorgeous. Oh yes, must search for icons tomorrow at some point.

007. I miss you guys, a lot. What's up in your world?! Tell me, I wanna know what I've been missing.

008. I've been re-watching a lot of old!school E.R. and I really miss Dr. Greene now more than I ever did when it was in actual syndication, I think. But, I love how Carter got to set the tone after his death, that show was so epic in so many different ways. It pretty much set the tone for all medical drama's that followed. I love that Susan came back, but it was sad that it was right around the time that Mark was dying and my little shipper heart was crushed when Abby and Luca didn't work out so much.

I never really shipped Carter/Abby back in the day, but re-watching the series as a whole I can definitely understand why so many others shipped them. In fact, I might even be a little bit guilty of doing that myself these days just a little. Of course, I always HATED the shipper name that came attached to them, Carby. God, that sucked out loud. lolz.

009. I am so tired, but I uploaded some new icons so you should check them out.

"I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love." - Mother Teresa ;; Hotch

Current Mood: tiredtired
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