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[09 Feb 2008|05:03pm] i got a job at the mailroom. i work 9 hours a week at $8.75 an hour and it's basically awesome. i stand around, laugh at people's magazine subscriptions, make fun of people's full names and get paid for it. yeaaaah. give it a try

[09 Feb 2008|12:26am] ... blah. give it a try

[07 Nov 2007|10:11pm] [this is not a rant] so as i am in my cold ass room, failing a couple of classes here and there, sitting in the bleak darkness i'm realizing only one thing - for the last half of senior year and most of the summer my one goal was to leave new jersey and to get away from all the fucking drama, the lost friends, the end of andrew and me, and everything that falls in between. so then i went to boston, and i loved it for 2 months, but as it nears thanksgiving, i'm realizing how much i fucking miss home. i miss home SO FUCKING MUCH i find myself waking up EVERYDAY wishing it was november 20 and wishing i could board that greyhound and go home to everything i left. just the idea of home and everything that comes with it - driving, working, the diner, the best diner coffee, my house, my street, andrew, new jersey, warmer cold weather (if that's possible, since it's freezing here), family, my brother's kids, everything. and it's kinda sad that i have to go to bed early a lot and cry a lot to myself and just miss everything the way it used to be - even though i can't really get andrew back and everything else was mostly miserable with some shitty friends. i'm pretty sure that this is all due to the fact that i have no job, i barely have any spending money (which here is a death-threat, since everything revolves around going out and shopping and extravagant things) and that i'm ALONE. yeahhhh that's fucking right. it's also pretty sad that i have to complain about this and this almost feels like 8th grade whineyness about not having a boyfriend but for anyone who's ever been in a long relationship and has felt real fucking love knows that it's hard to go from that to waking up everyday and not having much to wake up to. so as that is all said, i'm going to go and attempt to unfail these college classes because p.s. college is kicking my ass OH BOY. 13 fucking days, and i might have 4 days of temporary permanent happiness. plus, i get to see andrew and be with him. i'm a little sad for now, but overall i'm staying optimistic and happy! 13 days! <3 [this was not a rant] 5 keep on singing|give it a try

[02 Jan 2006|06:27pm] 69 keep on singing|give it a try

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