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[Saturday
October 4th, 2008 at 10:50pm] |
i cannot wait until i finish this pint of ice cream so i can just puke.
what is it about the fall that makes me relapse?
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[Friday
October 3rd, 2008 at 12:58am] |
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i miss purging more than anything.
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[Friday
September 19th, 2008 at 11:47pm] |
i counted out 30 of my step dad's pills today and was so tempted to just end everything.
you're the only thing keeping me around.
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[Saturday
September 13th, 2008 at 1:15am] |
i just paced around chain smoking for about an hour because i am full and i can't puke
everyone thinks i'm crazy.
great.
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[Friday
September 12th, 2008 at 11:37pm] |
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holy fucking shit i am a cow and a half. fuck college. fuck life. fuck me being fat and ugly ......
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[Monday
September 1st, 2008 at 10:57pm] |
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college is weird.
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[Thursday
August 28th, 2008 at 2:17am] |
i have my period, i'm quitting smoking, i'm starting college in 3 days.
fuck my life, fuck my life, and fuck my fucking life.
my roomate is really cute and little and i'm jealous. her name is megan.
tonight i ate a whole pint of phish food ice cream.
also, i haven't had sex in about a month.
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[Tuesday
August 26th, 2008 at 1:04am] |
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I can't handle growing up or moving on.
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[Friday
August 15th, 2008 at 12:13am] |
should i cut my hair?
y/n?
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[Wednesday
August 6th, 2008 at 3:24am] |
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I seriously just went from being the most happy hyper person in the world to the most depressed person in the world in about 10.3 seconds.
I hate guys. Why must they fuck around with your head and be so inconsiderate?
I'm fucking done with them going for the hot bimbo's with no fucking personality over me.
Fuck my life, fuck men, and fuck being really fucking fat.
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[Tuesday
August 5th, 2008 at 1:21am] |
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I JUST WANT A GODDAMN PIECE OF PEPPERONI PIZZA WITHOUT ALL THE FUCKING GUILT!!!! IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR!?!??!??!?!?!
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[Saturday
August 2nd, 2008 at 1:30am] |
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I feel really bad for my future roommate. I should apologize in advance for my mood swings, insomnia, crying spells, possessiveness, and OCD.
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[Thursday
July 31st, 2008 at 11:19am] |
Yesterday I had one small meal, overdosed on caffeine (about 14 full cups of coffee I kid you not), took a percocet, went running around in the pouring rain, and went to bed at 4 a.m. I think the whole finally getting my period/ major blood loss that I've been having is making everything affect me 300 times more than it usually would.
Then I went to rehab in my dream and I met a bulimic pill-popper who gave me a fortune cookie that taught me how to say "boobie" in chinese.
What the fuck?
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[Tuesday
July 29th, 2008 at 12:47am] |
So I am the size of a baby whale at the moment.
August 1st I'm going to start restricting. That will give me 30 days to lose as much weight as possible before I move into my dorm room. I still have no idea who my roommate is. I am not buying clothes for school until like, the 28th or something. Wow, I am a fuckhead for letting myself get this huge. What a fucking shit-show.
Also, I almost got arrested tonight around 12 for peeing in a stop and shop parking lot....
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[Friday
June 27th, 2008 at 1:16am] |
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if i see one more picture of me when i was really skinny while i'm in my dad's house i might jump off of a cliff.
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[Wednesday
June 25th, 2008 at 8:17pm] |
my car broke down in the middle of the GHETTO of my town.. in the middle of a 4 way intersection.. no lie.
i got a new tattoo on my ankel.
my parentals hate me.
and i am a cow, but that's not really new news.
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| It's not a habit, it's cool. I feel alive.. |
[Friday
June 20th, 2008 at 1:21am] |
OKAY SORRY ONE MORE THING.
i think of myself as kind of a "pain addict."
piercings, tattoos, purging, cutting, starving, etc.
(not to mention the fucked up one night stands that i get myself into leaving me to hate myself)
i googled pain addict and i got this kind of article thingy and it's so true it's scary.
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[Friday
June 20th, 2008 at 1:07am] |
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but seriously, i'm getting uglier by the day. last time i thought i looked decent was about a month ago and i'm def. gaining about 2 pounds a week. yay me.
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[Friday
June 20th, 2008 at 1:03am] |
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SO. HUGE. FUCKMYLIFE.
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[Monday
June 16th, 2008 at 12:15am] |
i pierced my nose. idk if you can see it, it's really small.
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_stfufat's journal