updated every so often
Hello good people of...Lauren
A Split Rubber Stopper doesn't do any good
This Book Smells!
They're bowls not balls
How do you say donut?
*referring to our group name*
Mr. Lorcher: Wow, Wait till I go home and tell my Wife I hung out with the Cheetah Girls! You do know who they are right?
Jill: Yeah, on the Disney channel
Mr. Lorcher: Oh..there's Disney Channel ones?
Mr Lorcher: I went home and told my wife "There are these four very sweet girls in my fifth period who names themselves the Cheetah Girls" and she goes "Oh no..they didn't!?"
Me: I don't know! I am copying from you!
Bo: Whoa! Your copying from me?
Bo: Wow, no one has ever copied from me before...
Rachelle: You two look like brother and sister
Bo: Dude, she's like my sister from another mother
Mr. Lorcher: OK, what is he negative about?
Robert: The War?
Mr. Lorcher: He's negative about the war?
Cecilee: Do you have any tweezers?
Bo: It's so she can pluck her hairs on her chin
Charmagne: *is yelling in tagalog*
Me: What's she saying?
Rachelle: Something about picking her up, volleyball match, 4:30, Charlie
I remember Sb as Antimony because, Sb..Sirius Black..and Antimony..Anti Moony
Can I have a piece of paper?
Ms. Garry: How many bloody types are there?
Joel: A BILLION!!!
I wish I had boobies...I'd rub them everyday
Joel: I need to take my pants off
Me: *is staring*
Joel: What? It's not like you haven't seen me without them before!
Ms. Garry: Who invented pencillin?
Mr. Lorcher: Retarded Ravens, what do you have for mummer?
Mr. Lorcher: The Sovereign 3 what do you have for disprobation?
Deb makes me laugh so hard I fall INTO chairs!
Jody: She goes to Utah for the Summer and comes down here for the Winter
Me: She migrates
Good Lord Love a Duck!
I took anger management three times...failed it everytime
Ms. Weber: What is the book of Gilgamesh about?
She's Half Gay?
It's like we're having a car orgy
You'd think...Car full of girls..I'd be in heaven
Excuse me sir...Do you know your hair is on fire?
Rachel: We have to go and see if we can find a Ravenclaw shirt for a certain someone
Carie: What's Ravenclaw?
Me: *mouth drops open*
Rachel: Oh god you've offended her!!
Rachel: It looks like he's got leg warmers on!!
Me: *is laughing*
Rachel: Get up here you maniac!
Me: *is cracking up*
Rachel: You getting ready to go do your Flashdance moves?
Me: *is crying from laughing so hard*
Bo: Have you ever cheated or copied from anyone before?
Bo: Like, on a test?
Bo: Not once?
Bo: How about like looking at someones essay to get an idea for your own?
Me: Oh yeah, I've done that!
Bo: I'm proud of you!
*not paying attention*
*crashes into two foot high pole*
Bo: Did you do this paper?
Bo: Where is it?
Me: I..uh turned it in?
Bo: WHAT??!! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?
Me: Because I was done!
Bo: You should fail! "Lauren pays attention, but does NOT follow directions!"
Bo: So do you write down the objectives every day?
Bo: Good, Im proud of you...even if it means I have to find someone else to copy I am still proud of you!
*Bo bumps my elbow*
Bo: Im sorry
Me: It's fine!
Bo: Im really sorry...do you forgive me?
Bo: In my country of ....Sweden, when two people forgive each other, they have to make out with one another...so let's go!
Ms. Darnell: Ok, first things first, new seats!
*turns and looks at me*
Bo: Wait, no!! What am I going to do!!?? *turns and looks at other people* what am I going to do!!
Me: Looks like, you have to find someone else to copy from
Mr. Lorcher: OK, Christina pick someone else to read
Matt: Jill can't read
Robert: So, that new King Kong movie looks pretty good
Me: Yup, it does
Robert: You wanna know something?
Robert: I AM King Kong!
Me: Of course you are...
Robert: You're amazing Lauren
Robert: You really are! Bo, don't you just think Lauren is amazing? She really is
Bo: Yeah, she is amazing, we're gonna have babies
David: My future wife right here
David: Wouldn't it be weird if we did get married like in the future?
Bo: Do you miss me?
Bo: Seriously and Honestly?
Bo: You miss the entertainment right? I miss your brains
Bo: When we're older Robert and my kids are gonna get married, Hopefully it'll be my daughter and his son that way I can go "My daughter's a Dzuiba!!"
Robert: *yawns and puts arm around me*
Bo: Oh, he's soo smooth
*Talking about the mooshy pillows*
Cecilee: Oh! I have the exact same one!
Everett: I know, I have a huge one too
Gretchen: Mine's green
Me: I have an elephant
Rachelle: David, Lauren wants a hug!
David: *stands up and holds arms out*
Lauren: He's serious? *stands up and hugs David*
David: Oh!!! I'm never going to let go!!!! *hugs harder, then lets go and marks on hand* "12/14...First hug 4rm Lauren"*
*talking to me*
Rachelle: So, Carlos likes beans, I like rice...What do you like?
David: She likes David
Bo: K, Lauren's done reading everyone, get your pens and pencils ready!
*talking about my ring*
Bo: Is that a promise ring?
Bo: Who gave it to you?
Me: My mom and dad
Bo: Yeah, they better have!
*While watching a video on Marie Curie and her Husband*
Bo: That's you and me
*puts hand on my knee*
Bo: The perfect couple, Seriously, you have the books smarts, I have the street smarts, together our child would be the perfect human being! That's what we could name him! Then when he goes to school the kids will be like whats your first name "The" your middle? "Perfect" Last? "Human Being"
David: Hey baby! *blows kiss*
Bo: So are you the aunt of her?
Bo: We've had this conversation before huh? And I was like "Oh yeah, he's wearing blue"
*Watching Narnia and Mrs. Macreedy is telling the horse to hurry up*
Kristin: I woulda told her if I was the horse, "get off and walk your ass there. Look at this hill! You can walk it!!"
Rachel: *throws ball*
Einstein: *bring it back, drops it, and takes off running again*
Sarah: Yeah, Can I get, three corndogs, four chili cheese fries, two deluxe dogs, two chili cheese dogs, a medium dr. pepper, a medium diet coke, a medium diet pepsi, and a medium mountain dew please?
Lady: Sure, anything else?
Sarah: Nah, I think that'll do
Rachel: God we're fat
Man: Uh, there's been a change. Troup 417 has been disqualified because one of your members urine samples came back and tested positive for three different kinds of anabolic sterioids and a beaver tranquilizer
*Shows manly little girl*
Black Girl: *throws hat at her* GOD DAMN YOU BERNICE!!
*Kenny bought a squash instead of a pumpkin*
Cartman: *sighs* God damn I hate you Kenny
Dad: Wheres the baby?
Me: I left him up there all by himself on the bed
Dad: Well he's gonna roll off!
(just kidding peoples)
“I don’t know,” Tony gave me a sheer look of suspicion, “you tell me. Why did you stab my steak then, steak-stealer?”
“It wasn’t dead,” I said sarcastically. However, Tony’s eyes widened considerably and he shifted his chair away from the table.
“Mom!” he screeched. “My steak wasn’t dead!”
Bo: Hey look a 100%! Must have been back when I was sitting next to you
Charmagne: What's senechaux?
Rachelle: (Answering a different question)People hit each other with sticks.
*Watching a video and it shows men in swimsuits on the beach*
Bo: *covers my eyes* WHOA! You don't need to see that
Rachelle's Text: U
few minutes later
few minutes later
Rachelle: Bilbo Spankins lmao!
Rachel: Can I have potato dad?
Tim: What was that?
Rachel: I said could I have a potato
Tim: What's taters precious? hmmm?
Me: *Snorts into lemonade*
Tim: Lauren, how do you make potatoes?
Rachel: Lauren dont do it, it'll only encourage him
Me: *is laughing so hard* You..boil them, mash them, and stick them in a stew
Me & Tim: *are cracking up*
Russ: I'm jealous that he has more hair than me
Mom: He does
Russ: There was a time when my aunt loved me
*talking about the autistic boy she works with*
Rachel: He tells me we're married now, but he's sad about it
Bo: *slides hand up my leg*
Me: HEY HEY HEY!
Bo: What you don't like it?
Charmagne: He told us his brother was a sniper
Diane: He told us his brother was an engineer in the South Pole
Me: He told us his brother was a genius
Rachelle: He told me he loved me
Joel: *jumps on my back*
David: Get off of my wife! Or I'll beat you within inch of your life!!
Mr. Lorcher: Conversation between people and idea development, do not match up!
Rachelle: She's distracted
Bo: What can I say, I try
Bo: She is a genius...an extremely hot genius...who I wouldn't mind breeding with
I probably just lost my shot when I said breeding huh?
Me: Can I have 10 dollars?
Dad: I thought you and your mom robbed me of all my money yesterday?
Me: Pfft..I only took 62 dollars
*I lured Callie out of my room under false pretenses*
Dad: When you have a child, make sure to name him Hansel
Dad: Because you'd leave him out in the woods with no food all by himself
*Few minutes later*
Dad: If your kids ever go missing, we're going to call the cops and tell them that you left them in the forest.
Mr. Lorcher: What is Mrs. Claus' first name?
Mr. Soares: ...Mrs?
*Fire alarm goes off*
*few seconds pass, no one moves*
Mr. Lorcher: Well go!
Dad: Hey! Theres an overweight kitty on the bookshelf, and the smaller lesser weight kitty is orbiting around him.
Mom: She doesn't go to class everyday
Dad: Thats the way I used to do it
Dad: Uh oh! Your momma's driving, get your helmets on!
Rachel: His pants are too short
Tim: He's getting ready for a flood
Dad: Eat your potatoes dear
Me: Yes, Eat your taters precious
Not ten minutes later, Jareth was sitting in the throne room, one leg casually draped over an arm of the throne, reading a book, when one of his smaller goblins dashed by, screeching madly, closely followed by something white and hissing. He glanced up curiously to watch the two creatures disappear down the stairway that led to the dungeons, and then calmly went back to his book.
Sarah arrived moments later and stopped in front of him, panting heavily and trying to catch her breath to speak. “Where—?”
Without taking his eyes off his book, Jareth wordlessly pointed to the stairs.
“Thanks,” she said, and went after them.
Sandra: You know, one of these days Bo, you're going to fall back and hit your head and go unconsicous and then I'd have to perform CPR on you-
Bo: OH YES!! OW! I HIT MY HEAD!!! CAN'T BREATHE
Bo: That's my pencil
Me: I know, and I am using it right now
Bo: Oh...ok, but only cause you're so smart
Joel: I'm going to tell all my friends that
Matt: You don't have any friends
Bo: And I was like "Oh there it is!"
Matt: That's what she said
*Blonde girl comes up on screen, everyone screams*
Ryan: AHH!! A BLONDE!!!!!!
Ryan: Lauren? Im Scared
Me: Me too Ryan, Me too
Me: My throat hurts
Matt: I've heard that before
Oscar: Lauren's going to cure cancer
Sandra: You are?
Sandra: Well, your going to be rich, you'd better share
Lauren: Don't worry, You can come live with me in my mansion and I'll buy you anything you want
*talking about me and brandy*
Bo: Why don't you two stop texting and start making out..I mean...
Bo: Lauren's the Genuis White Girl
Juana is the Genuis Mexican
and Rachelle is the Genius Filippino Dog Eater
Oscar: Do you have the pencil Lauren?
Me: No I didn't have one
Oscar: What are you doing lauren? Stealing Pencils?
Mr.Lorcher: Oh you know Lauren, gotta keep an eye on her.
Matt: Dracula, blah, blah, blah, gimme your cereal!
Russ: Oh thats of the hizzle dizzle..
Me: Please Russell, not in a public place
Rachel: *talking to mom* We're driving home to Weinerschniztel, I mean driving to weinerschniztel then home
Me: Whats the difference?
Bo: You're so smart, I swear one day we're gonna have babies and they're going to be so intelligent
Matt: Blow Bo Blow
Oscar: Blow Harder Bo!!
Matt: Aw, it went limp
Matt: Can I go to starbucks with some friends?
Rachelle: Aw, we're his friends!
My text: Bo's not here today, sad :`-(
Brandy's Text: Oh, Im sorry where is he?
Mine: He's in Utah
Brandy: ahahaha mormanville lmao
Mine: lmao, that was the first thought that popped into my head
Brandy: we're going to hell
Mine: Yeah I know
Me: They were playing all oldies songs during our passing period, and you wanna know the sad thing?
Me: I knew every single one of them
David: Hey wifey
Me: I thought we weren't getting married anymore because Rachelle ruined it...
David:...oh yeah huh?
*Opens up present, it's a cd holder for a car's viser*
Me: *looks around* Do I get a car as well?
*I'm talking to Oscar*
Bo: Dude, I sat next to her last semester and she like never talks. She talks in full sentences now! Geez, that's what I tried to get her to do.
Bo: You have skills, It takes real skills to finish two quizzes in a row fast. You are like an artist of knowledge
Ms. Solo: OK, you have to pick names for your teams, but they have to be continents
Mariam: OK, OK! We have our team name!
Mariam: No, Mexico!
Me & Ms Solo: Mexico is a country, not a continent
Mariam: Oh, OK then China!
Grace: China is a city
Me: *puts head in hands and gives a little sob* I'm surrounded by idiots
Matt: You should be like I got an i8
Me: K, and then?
Matt: Put "Sacre Bleu! C'est inadmissable!!"
Me: *laughs* OK then, what should you get?
Matt: 20...no wait...21!
Me: That's not even possible!
Bo: Did you lose your softball game yesterday?
Bo: What was the score?
Bo: What??? How do you score 24 points in softball? Even if you DOUBLED your score you'd still lose!
Dad: We need to work on your dating etiquette
Mom: She's not dating
Dad: Oh, well nevermind then
Bo: So how is Stephen King
Me: He's fine
Mr. Lorcher: So, what's a sentinel? It's a guard
Bo: Really? I thought it was a robot
*looks at me*
Lauren get's it, she's an x-men fan
Chyna: *is putting something into her calculator*
SYNTAX ERROR??? YOUR MOM'S A SYNTAX ERROR!
Ms. Weber: Can you people not be quiet?
Brandon: She sneezed! We were saying Bless you! If we didn't then her soul would have escaped!
Latrice: That's what's up!
Me: Do you want to use the forceps?
Bo: Why would I want to use them?
Me: So it'd be easier to pick up
Bo: Your mom's easy to pick up...OOHHHH!!
Robert: Lauren's so cool!
Jackie: gayseeus..is that how you pronounce it?
Ms. Darnell: Gaseous
Robert: Oscar likes you!
Me: Oh *turns around to face Joel*
Joel: You should kiss me!
*Girls are singing LOVE by Keyshia Cole...badly*
Irene: Oh my god! Shut up! It sounds like a dog getting ran over by a lawn mower!
*Destyne hit's a high note...awfully*
Irene: and that's a cat
Ms: Darnell: Ca O
Desiree: This is unfair!
The two smart people are together
The two asians are together
and then it's the dumbass white girls!
Mr. Lorcher: Lauren
Me: In the dark, deserted house, the flame of a candle danced in the attic window
Mr. Lorcher: Danced! That's very good...Your very selfish Lauren, holding out that wonderful sentence on us, You should be ashamed of yourself..Joel go.
Matt: Lowron, Je voudrais le writing utensil, s'il vous plait!
Me: I think there's a hole in my glass...and my mouth
Sammi: Heck...You said the other H word
Me: I miss you, I have no one steal french fries from at lunch anymore =[
Mom: Theres something on your back
Dad: What is it?
Mom: I don't know, it's a bump...
Dad: Is it a tumor
Mom: *sarcastically* yeah its a tumor
Dad: Well, where is it?
Mom: Right here
Dad: Uh, that's my spine
Me: *Laughing uncontrablly*
Dad: I need my brush, Lauren will you get it please?
Me: *runs up stairs, grabs brush, runs back down*
Mom: I also need my cell phone too please its on the bed
Dad: *laughs* I need mine too, will you get it?
Me: Gooooooooooooooood! *stomps up stairs* could you not have told me when I went up there in the first place!!??
Me: *hands dad the phones and begins to walk into the kitchen*
Dad: Oh yeah I need my cigarettes too, could you get those as well?
Me: DAAAAAAD!! *sighs* where are they??
Dad: *in squeaky voice* Oh nevermind, I think they are upstairs, I'll get them...
*written on a note*
Rachel: Lauren, Don't wear my tiara and garter around the house. :)
Me: I'll try and restrain myself
Deb: See, my friends all think these sandals are cute, and Im like "They're JESUS sandals!!!"
Me: Sarah why does your myspace say you are 83 years old? Are you trying to feel older than you already are? :]
Sarah: We are fighting! So not sisters anymore!
Rachel: Sarah's going to teach PE for special kids
Dad: Those kids are going to be out on the basketball court with their helmets on running into eachother
Mr.Fullman: So, who are we going to blame?
Me: Russ, why are you listening to country?
Russ: I've come to believe that my IQ is too high, so I need to find ways to lower it
Mr. Fullman: So who invented oxygen?
Mr. Fullman: Jesus!? So BC, before Christ, what did they do before Jesus discovered oxygen?
Brandon: They didn't breathe
Mom: You got the retarded cart Rachel
Me: Nice Going Rachel
Rachel: I was thinking of you when I got it, OH BURN!!!
Gabe: God has a myspace
Mr. Fullman: So, what's in all that empty space between the protons and the neutrons?
Sarah: We're all going to hell, Good thing we'll all be together
Mr. Fullman: So who gave us air?
Robert: Sheesh who died?
ChYnEsEDoLL89: homo lol
ChYnEsEDoLL89: you know what?! I'm tired of your lip! You aren't asian by association anymore!
FaDiNgSiLvErStAr: no please
FaDiNgSiLvErStAr: im sorry
ChYnEsEDoLL89: Yeah that'ts what I thought
Russell: We can use the sunlight reflecting off your skin as a new source of energy
Rachelle: Who's making that music?
*After having taking Turkey body parts out*
Rachel: EW EW EW
Me: What did you touch?
Rachel: I have NO idea
*talking about the heating lamp*
Rachelle: I wonder what happens if you touch it
Me: You become a dragon rider
Ryan: NO! you become a lamp rider!
Rachel: I wonder if you can jump on these beds?
Me: Try it and find out
Rachel: What? I was just testing the sturdiness!
Mr. Giusto: At least he didn't have Gonorrhoea I would have had a hard time explaining that
Katie: What's Gonorrhoea?
Mr. Giusto: Any 49er fans in here?
Mr. Giusto: Good Class, Good Class
Mr. Giusto: Any Raiders fans in here?
Mr. Giusto: Good Class, Good Class
Mr. Giusto: Any Brown's fans in here?
Mr. Giusto: Bad Class, Bad Class!
Russell: Say Look Grandma Jody we have real milk!
Mom: As opposed to fake milk?
*Rachel takes of Jonathon's Shirt*
Dad: Hey Mom, My nipples are showing!
Everett: Hector you missed a spot
Hector: Your mom missed a spot
Everett: That made absolutely no sense at all
Brandon: But it was funny
Rachel: Aw, are you hiding your nipples?
Mom: Jonathon, Get out of the cat water! And get my Yoda out of there!
Rachel: He is swimming *pause* swimming is he
Christina: How much is the essay worth?
Mr. Isle: A THOUSAND!
Jessica: How many slides are there?
Mr. Isle: A thousand!
Danica: I want some blush.
Kristy: Girl, you're black, you don't need blush!
Danica: You should ask for his picture, and when he asks why? Say so it's you can show Santa what you want for Christmas!
Anthony: Lauren! Guess what I did last night!?
Me: Do I want to know what you did last night?
Sarah: I wanna see mom put on her headlight thing! I've almost had enough to drink that I could do it.
*knocks some stuff over*
Me: I think you have had enough to drink.
Sarah: You shut the hell up!
*Kristy walks in with Justin*
Kristy: Look who I found out on the street.
Mayra: A tiny little man!
Kristy: Does anyone know how to make a paper crane.
Mayra: No, I'm not asian.
Anthony: *explaining really slowly*
Kristy: He's deaf, not slow.
Mayra: I said four over ten dammit!
Kristy: I don't want to play where's waldo with his man!
Anthony: I'll kill you!!
Me: *trying to spell boobies with calculator*
Mr. Isle: Sleep soundly, knowing that the secretary of agriculture could be your president.
Cristina: Does Mr. Isle have moobs?
Cristina: Berenice says that Mr. Isle's moobs are bigger than hers.
Me: Why are you fondling my ears?
Daphne: Shut up!
Mayra: Oh Jesus
Professor Crean: You're going to do it with a square
Mayra: We're going to have to do it with him...Oh my god!
Daphne: You just lick your lips and go down
*Professor Crean is trying to break up fight*
Me: PUNCH HIM!
Maria: Lauren! Don't say that you're going to go to hell!
Professor Crean: This is your hand!
Me: Very good. Now where is your foot? Insert it into your ass.
Mayra: You make me LOL
Cristina: *reading* geo-desic
Mayra: You gave me boobie cancer
Mayra: The inappropriately nerdly table.
Danica: Ask him what his favorite band is
Me: The composers of Gauntlet
Daphne: I farted
Mayra: Oh my...
Kristy: What kind of music is it?
Me: The background music for Gauntlet.
Danica: It's this *hums Star Wars theme*
Me: I LOVE THAT SONG!
Danica: Whoever said that must really be a nerd. Was that you Lauren?
Daphne: She's with her friends eating in a car.
Maria: Well we know who she's with. Where's Jeo?
Daphne: If she's with Jeo, we all know what she'd be eating.
Cristina: You already sold 7!?
Charmagne: She sold 26!
Cristina: You sold 26!?
Isle: This is just for Joel...Madness.
Joel: Jerk! Is there a jerk one in there for you?!
Bo: Men were too busy for superstitions they were building the eiffel tower out of steel and chrome!
Me: I don't think I shoved that cupcake into my mouth fast enough.
Daphne: Well if it was Jeo, we know you'd shove it in fast.
Daphne: My P came out squiggly.
Me: You should get that checked out.
Mayra: Damn you constipated Elvis!
Shelly: *something about clouds*
Cristina: I'm afraid of clouds
Shelly: Girl how are you afraid of clouds!?
Cristina: Oh clouds!? I thought you said clowns.
Shelly: Ohh damn, I was like how do you go outside!?
Daphne: According to Cosmo, my sex position is that one where you sit on the guy backwards.
Mayra&I: Reverse Cowgirl?
Daphne: I'm good at wielding a lightsabre.
Me: I bet you are
Daphne: Man you got me with that one
Me: Yes I did.
Sarah: She said fuck off
Mom: Why'd she say that?
Sarah: Because I won't take "my poor knocked up sister out to lunch"
*few minutes later*
Mom: I have your nine dollars Lauren
Sarah: I want nine dollars. Why does she get nine dollars?
Me: Because I bought my poor knocked up sister her vitamins.
Karen: There's Red Mango here
Me: What's Red Mango?
Joel: A mango that's red.
Kristy's Text: Aw your lover is all alone :(
Mine: I knw. The stupid guy with the beard threw the sitting thing out of wack. I mean there was a perfectly good seat open right next to me.
Kristy's: Haha Ur Crazy
Mine: Its true tho. He couldnt have sat next to the guy in front of him *The Bearded One*
Kristy's: Now we gotta get rid of santa (the guy with the beard)
Mine: Take him out to Hoover Dam and do you thing
Kristy's: LMAO. OMG that was soooo funny. I got u. We will probably go on a field trip eventually. Lol.
Mine: Haha Yay! :D
Kristy's: Aha. Ur so mean.
*few minutes later about this older lady in our geography class*
Mine: I keep thinking the old lady is gong to die if she keeps coughing...
Kristy's: Omg. U are sooo mean. I wonder what she is majoring in? Lmao
Mine: Haha Im just saying. Prob something boring
Kristy's: Does she even have time to major?
Mine: LOL. Not with that cough she doesn't
Kristy's: Haha Im down here crackin up. Haha. I think shes learning about wat could go on while she is in her grave
Mine: Haha I was cracking up as i texted it. LOL. Probably. Death 101: What to expect when you die. [I seriously was dying of laughter as I texted it. I had to keep taking deep breaths to calm myself]
Kristy's: Haha Ur funny. Omg...we're going to hell. She takin notes and everythang
Mine: Lol yeah, we are. Rly well at least when she goes she'll be educated about the atmosphere
Kristy's: Haha yep kuz she just wants to kno how her new habitat will be like
Mine: LOL! hahahahaha yep.
*few minutes later, she coughs really badly*
Kristy's: Did you her cough. Omg
Mine: Told you. Any more of those and shes going to be face flat on her desk dead.
*Kristy looks up at me and shakes her head laughing*
Kristy's: Omg. Ima kill you
Daphne's Text: Lol i can't i'm too hyped up lol i really want those red hig heeled screw me shoes right now lmao you know what? i have a pair from prom lol
Mine: I thought that said I want his red hot thighs screwing me for a second.
Daphne's: Lmao I didnt stop laughing for like 10 mins
Daphne's Text: I looked at the neville lookalike and i remembered what you said and laughed
Mine: What did I say?
Daphne's: That he schould be honored because he's badass.
Mine: Oh yeah! Well he should be.
Juana: Do you guys know what celluar respiration is?
Me: Is it when cells breathe?
Juana: Kristy, do you know anything about celluar respiration?
Kristy: *Starts laughing*
Daphne: *about me* You know before I got to know you, I thought you were all innocent, didn't believe in premarital sex, and didn't have a dirty mind. And now when people go 'Oh you're so pure and innocent'. I'm like HA!!
Me: Are you buying the stairway to heaven?
Daphne: What's the stairway to heaven?
Me: Oh my god! I have failed you as your classic rock loving friend
My Text: I was telling myself my back hurts, then I was like maybe I shouldn't spend so much time on it, and then i was like oh i just burned myself lmao.
My text: Oh thank god I had my phone on vibrate when my dad called otherwise lord of the rings wouldve been playing and then they prob would of walked over and started talking to me in elvish. And the only elvish word I know is friend. And they prob wouldve thought i was trying to be friends with them D:
My text: lmfao! Im reading cosmo and they have 10 signs youre being too bitchy and 7 is you routinely yell at your houseplants for being too demanding. i lold
My text: Hi Im Miley, Now Im Hannah, Now Im Miley, Ima real girl, Ima popstar! Everybody makes mistakes, Everybody has those days, Except for me because I'm perfect! Jackson<3
My text: Oh hai there rachelles starbucks boyfriend
My text: Haha. If only kevin were here to massage mine. And I can whisper naughty things in his spock ears.
My text: I ate a starburst and I dont like it and its sitting in my mouth and idk what to do. it tastes funny
Daphne's Text: That's what she said, then he said swallow.
My text: You can't see but I am giving you mean looks
My text: This girl checked him out and i almost snarled I swear
My text: My dad called this car a sexy beast, I'm mortified
My text: So, im at target and my flipflop broke. I need your ghetto fabulous self here to fix it for me!
Mayra: LMAO! Im on my way with my emergency staples
My text: So I was holding the baby and then I passed him off to my other cousin and he spit up on her lmao.
My text: He's eating apples, I bet he tastes like it.
*talking about how Daphne wants a dove and a sparrow tattoo*
Daphne: I think the dove is for like Jesus or something
Me: Who's the sparrow for? Moses?
Me: I hate when my mom goes into the liquor area and I have to wait outside like the sad little minor that I am
My text: I want a straw hat with an obscenely large brim that covers my entire face.
Daphne's: redneck hahaha
Mine: How does that make me a redneck? Samantha from Sex and the City has one and shes definitely not a redneck!
Daphne: i just imagine a farmer haha
Mine: lmao. well whatever and as u tell me this im watching cmt lmao
Daphne: hahaha lmfao see redneck haha.
*Mom's phone goes off*
Dad: *flips it open* Hello? Hello? Hello?
Mom: Is it a text message?
Dad: Oh hey it is, it says text!
*About Whole Lotta Love by Led Zeppelin*
Dad: This song lit me up when I was 14
Me: Is that a reference to drugs?
Mom: I'll get you one from Target.
Dad: Oh boy! A rake from Target! I'm just so excited, I am going to skip into the house!
Daphne's Text: Did you know there is an Indian Ocean?
Mine: Yes...Did you not know that?
Daphne's: No and we were in class and I was like cuz there is no indian ocean and one of the guys was mocking me for an answer and he was like cuz there is no pacific ocean. It was embarrassing!
Mine: What did you think was in between Africa and the Indonesian Islands?
Daphne's: Wth are the Indonesian Islands? lol.
Daphne's Text: And I want to travel haha. I guess I won't go to the indonesian islands!
Mine: Lmao! Maybe you should just avoid that section of the world. You'd probably get lost and be like this isnt even a real place!
Daphne's Text: Oh my god! My dad is a right lane freeway driver and he is going 55! How are we even related!?
Mom: We had stupid chicken for dinner.
Me: Well, if you had left something out I wouldn't have had to choose. And all you had was chicken! Like 6 bags of it! I had no choice!
Mom: There was roast out there!
Me: Oh it must have been buried under the 6 bags of chicken!
Cristina: Look, I'm making light!
Daphne's text: happyhappy
Daphne's: Very much so!!!! (: the hottie changed my tire and he put my keys in his back pocket and I had to get them out haha yay!!!!!
Mine: Oh I thought we were singing the song from ren and stimpy. But, still YAY for you haha.
Daphne *as me*: I LOVE YOU SCOTTY! BEAM ME UP!!
Me: I'm sorry my butt hurt, I had to share that.
My text: So, I'm at Disneyland, and I touched Princess Jasmine's weave. It was awkward
Mayra's: ROFL! Princess Jasmine is ghetto like me. Her outfit was probably stapled together
My text: Whole lotta love by Led Zeppelin is 3 and my dad goes "This song lit me up when I was 14" I was like "Is that a reference to drugs?"
My text: Haha no, but Cristina's tipsy and trying to light a tiki torch
My text: Oh God, she rested her head on Pamela! Pamela's been violated!
My text: Lmfao! My dad goes, "if tomorrow someone hands you a reefer, get rid of it, put it in your purse, bring it home for me!"
My text: "Oh shit hooker!" lmao, I love Lafeyette!
Mom: Lauren says it's terrible
Dad: Lauren lies like a dog!
Professor Shearer: I will freaking rain death on your ass!
Professor Shearer: I say Nay Nay!
Matt: Don't worry Charmagne, if Lauren and I don't clean up, housekeeping will!
Peter: You look like Princess Leia
frvrfadesaway: (9:47:10 PM) Looks like he's gonna go down on me.
dreamarchitct: (9:47:35 PM) FUcking A.
dreamarchitct: (9:47:38 PM) I want someone to go down on me
dreamarchitct: (9:47:41 PM) ...in RP land
dreamarchitct: (12:47:27 AM) LOL ok ok. You have 13 minutes
daphne_sauceda: (12:47:39 AM) BITCH!!!
dreamarchitct: (12:47:40 AM) (13 hours in which to solve the Labyrinth or your baby brother becomes one of us forever...)