Lo.

blsblablahblahahablah

Tue, 09 May 2006 18:29:06 GMT

hmm... man i have not updated in a long time, as usual. time has been going really fast. my spring classes are almost done. i haven't registered for summer classes and don't know if i will. yaaaaaaawwnn. i am so fucking tired. i go to sleep at 4am like every night and have to wake up at 9 on tuesdays.
i've been reading a lot.. i've read Irish Folk, Trad & Blues and am almost finished with Positively 4th Street. and i've really been listening to a lot of folk. john jacob niles, derroll adams, this 4 lp box set, trees, c.o.b. and tons of others. and i have lots of new albums i need to listen to.
i've been spending a lot of time at rateyourmusic.
here's my profile.
my mp3 blog is still not working. i don't know when ela will get her domain back up so i can host music... but she doesn't even have the internet right now so i don't blame her for not doing it.

Tue, 04 Apr 2006 02:07:40 GMT

i am feeling crazy. i want to bang my head against a wall. i want to break things.

ahh

Sat, 25 Feb 2006 05:19:48 GMT

god i never update this journal... it's just that my life has been so boring lately. i don't even have any boring pics to post.
melynda's plan to start a band isn't panning out well, we can't seem to make room for the drum set anywhere, so we don't have a place to practice.
i've been looking into different colleges are shit and i get so confused. i have no idea what i want to do or could do with my life. and the more i think about it the more confused i get.
i start a few more classes at metro march 8th.
lewis black is coming to the funny bone, but tickets are a lot of money, this makes me sad.
an albatross are playing at sokol in april. this makes me happy.
i finished reading donovan's autobiography. it was alright. loved the first several chapters where he talks about learning to play guitar and listening to records. lots of name dropping, it's good.
also finished Turn On Your Mind : Four Decades of Great Psychedelic Rock, it was alright. wish i had more to say...

Mon, 23 Jan 2006 03:04:04 GMT

i painted my room. took several days but i finally finished a few days ago. my room is still a mess though.
i need to register for classes at metro. i know what classes i want to take but i'm not sure if i can. me schedule would be tuesday and thursday 10-2 and then i'd have to go back from 6-9:30. pretty inconvenient. might not work out.
melynda is gonna start a band and she want me to play rhythm guitar. only thing is that she doesn't have a place to set up her drums and practice. she thought she could set them up in my room but there's definitely not enough space. ela is moving out any day now though so once she's out there might be room upstairs. i don't even know if i want to be in a band but i guess i'm gonna try. if i can't do it then ela will try. melynda has only been playing drums for about a week, and i've been playing guitar (kind of) for over 2 years so i figure i should at least try. whatever.

Sun, 22 Jan 2006 23:36:33 GMT

You scored as The Teardrop Explodes. Liverpoolâ��s The Teardrop Explodes were one of the few post-punk band to achieve commercial success, with their eccentric front-man Julian Cope becoming an unlikely pin up in the early 80s. Their music was often called â��neo-psychedelicâ�� due to their sixties sound and Copeâ��s surreal lyrics, best heard on 1980â��s classic â��Kilimanjaroâ��.

</td>

The Teardrop Explodes

90%

The Pop Group

77%

Throbbing Gristle

53%

The Fall

50%

Public Image Ltd.

50%

The Slits

47%

Wire

43%

Gang Of Four

20%

Cabaret Voltaire

17%

Joy Division

17%

Which Post Punk band are you?
created with QuizFarm.com

Fri, 30 Dec 2005 04:37:03 GMT

christmas is over. i got lots of books. not much money this year but that's okay. i got a new record player. and for my birthday (tomorrow) i get a new cd player. my old stereo system was a huge 5 cd changer/tape deck/shitty turntable thing and now i'm getting a sleek tiny cd player so it won't take up near as much space.
i'm going to be repainting my beautiful green room. i want to encourage my dad to put the house up for sale in the spring and a more boring, plain color would be better for selling a house. plus what with the carpet being ripped up and getting a huge and hideous rug along with a stupid little armoire my room always looks like shit anyway.
my dad got me this churchills cd for christmas. i've been listening to it a lot! damn it's really good. i'll post some of the songs up on my mp3 blog soon. ela got a new domain so i'm pretty sure i can do that now.
i quit taking lexapro, the med i was on for social anxiety. i stopped just because i kind of forgot to take it a few days and i've stayed off because i'm pretty sure that starting January first i won't have health insurance. so far things have been okay.

Sat, 26 Nov 2005 00:53:27 GMT

grr. i keep meaning to update but i just don't.
thanksgiving was good. i went over to my grandma's, as usual. seemed like a smaller crowed, i guess it was. jesse and his wife and new son weren't there, mike and his family weren't there. oh well, it was still nice. van spent the night. i brought the boxes with christmas stuff in them up into the living room. i slept in way late so by the time i came up this morning the christmas tree was already up, lights already on.
k, i had more to say but i forgot it all now.
i gotta post some ebay auctions.

Tue, 25 Oct 2005 01:54:06 GMT

today was a really nice day. when i woke up my dad gave me my package from holland that had my bulbs and bulb food so i planted them all today, finally. i'm so exciting thinking about next spring, i really think they will be amazing. i planted fritillaria persica, fritillaria meleagris, and fritillaria uva vulpis all together, and yellow colossal daffodils with jimmy triumph tulips (huge and orange), and the ^^^*Decoy Daffodil*^^ all together.
i've decided i'm not going to the Columbia open house, but i still might go to Chicago to visit UIC. i don't know.
my record player broke. i don't even know if i'm gonna try to fix it though because it doesn't have an aux output, so i kind of just want a new one anyway.
hmm.

Mon, 17 Oct 2005 01:19:04 GMT

i ended up going to the sleater kinney show. it was good. i'm glad i went.
ela's present still hasn't come. i don't know when it will come.
melynda's (early) birthday party was yesterday at my uncle and aunt's new house. it was nice.
still am not sure about this whole trip to chicago. i haven't got a plane ticket yet cause ela is still trying to find out if she can take some days off.
i ordered a bunch of books. in addition to 100 Greatest (UK) Psychedelic Records, i ordered another copy of Fuzz Acid & Flowers: Revisited, Cosmic Dreams at Play, The Great Rock Discography: Progressive and Psychedelic, The Magic Land, and i pre-ordered 2 copies of Tapestry of Delights: Revisited.
now i must do homework.

Thu, 13 Oct 2005 22:19:55 GMT

Advanced Global Personality Test Results

Extraversion	\|\|\|\|	13%
Stability	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	36%
Orderliness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	40%
Accommodation	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	50%
Interdependence	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	43%
Intellectual	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	63%
Mystical	\|\|	10%
Artistic	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	36%
Religious	\|\|	10%
Hedonism	\|\|	10%
Materialism	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	83%
Narcissism	\|\|\|\|\|\|	30%
Adventurousness	\|\|	10%
Work ethic	\|\|\|\|	16%
Self absorbed	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	56%
Conflict seeking	\|\|\|\|\|\|	30%
Need to dominate	\|\|\|\|	16%

Romantic	\|\|\|\|\|\|	30%
Avoidant	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	76%
Anti-authority	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	76%
Wealth	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	36%
Dependency	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	83%
Change averse	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	70%
Cautiousness	\|\|\|\|\|\|	30%
Individuality	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	76%
Sexuality	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	50%
Peter pan complex	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	83%
Physical security	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	56%
Physical Fitness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	64%
Histrionic	\|\|\|\|\|\|	30%
Paranoia	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	50%
Vanity	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	56%
Hypersensitivity	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	83%
Female cliche	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	56%

Take Free Advanced Global Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

trait snapshot:
messy, depressed, introverted, feels invisible, does not make friends easily, nihilistic, reveals little about self, fragile, dark, bizarre, feels undesirable, dislikes leadership, reclusive, weird, irritable, frequently second guesses self, unassertive, unsympathetic, low self control, observer, worrying, phobic, suspicious, unproductive, avoidant, negative, bad at saving money, emotionally sensitive, does not like to stand out, dislikes large parties, submissive, daydreamer

Tue, 11 Oct 2005 14:42:37 GMT

i bought a really really good book from Freak Emporium. woohoo, i hope i don't have to wait seven million weeks for it to ship like i have to do with Amazon.co.uk. oh and Tapestry of Delights: Revisited!!!!!! is coming out. Amazon says March 2006 but i think it might come out before that. Fuzz Acid & Flowers says Jan 2005 but i know it was available in Dec '04.
sleater kinney show is coming up. it's tomorrow. but i actually don't even think i will go :( i really want to but i shouldn't spend my money. and i'm kind of behind in one of my classes. i really really have to get caught up soon.
ela's b-day is on thursday. i ordered her a gift but i don't think it will come in time. oh well.
ela is thinking of going to chicago with me. she probably won't be able to take enough days off though. i need to try to set up a meeting with someone at UIC so i will probably do that today. i need to buy the plane ticket(s) soon. man the past couple weeks have gone by so fast.

weeee

Fri, 07 Oct 2005 13:24:20 GMT

1. Open a music player.
2. Go to 'all music'/'library'.
3. Hit shuffle.
4. Find photos of the first 10 artists/bands that come up [no repeats and no cheating].
5. Have people guess who the artists/bands are.
6. No fair clicking "view source"!

Tue, 20 Sep 2005 09:31:05 GMT

i tried to make my journal all pretty and stuff, check it out, if you care.

Wed, 14 Sep 2005 08:24:48 GMT

this took a long time. some of the songs i picked don't really fit, i just couldn't think of anything that did. and most of them are based on the overall sound, not the lyrics.

soundtrack of ur life (kinda long lol)
Created by thedude483 and taken 98 times on Bzoink
opening credits	fred neil - everybody's talking at me
blah
waking up	sleater kinney - what's mine is yours
getting dressed	zounds - knife
average day	fugs - carpe diem
work	x
falling asleep	a silver mt. zion - 13 angels...
social life
introduction of friends	fresh blueberry pancake - hassels
hanging with friends	groundhogs - times
getting ready to go out	epoxies - molded plastic
partying	ariel pink's haunted graffiti - jules lost his jewels
night out on the town	starlite desperation - born to be dizzy
loves
first sight	electric prunes - get me to the world on time
quirky flirting	incredible string band - painting box
first date	t. rex - rapids
first kiss	13th floor elevators - splash 1
sexing	fever tree - fever
arguing	trevor dunn & the trio convulsant - an attempt at jealousy
breaking up	julie driscoll brian auger & the trinity - break it up
hurt by significant other	daniel johnston - true love will find you in the end
secret crush	julian cope - when will i get to hold you
revenge	sleeytime gorilla museum - phthisis
getting back together	beck bogert appice - sweet sweet surrender
falling in love	budgie - you and i
general feelings
happy dance	andy bole - finikous
driving around	black sabbath - jack the stripper fairies wear boots
deep thought	tim buckley - pleasant street
long night alone	terry callier - 900 miles
isolation	music emporium - velvet sunsets
mental breakdown	gary higgins - cuekoo
possible suicide attempt	electric wizard - funeralopolis
argument with whoever	milky wimpshake - philosophical boxing gloves
fight!	400 blows - electric wilderness
heart to heart	whiskeytown - paper moon
a lesson learned	t. rex - life's an elevator
regret	acid bath - venus blue
life's okay afterall	arthur lee - everybody's gotta live
death scene	agents of oblivion - dead girl

final scenes of movie	the doors - when the music's over
end credits	zombies - hung up on a dream
Create a Survey \| Search Surveys \| Go to Bzoink

Fri, 29 Jul 2005 17:56:49 GMT

i got my MP3 blog up: quartertone.
i'm not sure how i came up with quartertone as the name but when i was signing up at blogger i couldn't think of anything else. i just remember thinking of sun ra talking to some guy about quartertones in an interview or something, i dunno. i really need to change the appearance of it, it's ugly and boring (though it did look really good on my brother's PSP!!) anyway.. plleease check it out and let me know what you think. if you think it sucks tell me how i could maybe make it suck less.. so far all i have put up there is 3 random tracks, but i will post more probably tomorrow, and i think most of my future posts will have some sort of theme. it could be really cool, as long as people go to it. most people i talk to on-line are on soulseek and can download hundreds of songs from me at any time so they couldn't care less.
anyway, i'm dead fucking tired, drinking some red bull right now. i think i will be going to see that love dog movie or whatever it is in about an hour or so. i don't even know what it is about. i hope i don't fall asleep.

Sat, 23 Jul 2005 11:11:24 GMT

mmm i'm tired. i suck at being asleep and being awake and the right times.
i got a new mouse pad, it's metal and works really good.
i went to the art store and got a set of some nice graphite pencils. i'm planning on drawing several pictures. i have started on syd barrett's but i'm not doing so good, i'm hoping i will get better or at least faster, it shouldn't take me hours and hours just to draw a face that looks really shitty. but i need some pencils that are lighter than 4H so i'm gonna have to go back to the store.
i made an appointment to take the math placement test at metro for Tuesday @ 2pm. i have to get some sort of study guide for it though.
i couldn't get ahold of destiny or mike so going to hustle & flow didn't work out. i am sure i'll go see it sometime, not sure when though.
k, i think i will go back to work on syd now.

yawnfest

Wed, 20 Jul 2005 15:04:51 GMT

i didn't sleep last night at all. 4am always comes around so quick. i got in bed and started reading for quite a while and then still couldn't get to sleep so around 6 i walked to the gas station, got some red bull so i can stay up for the rest of the day, instead of going to sleep at noon and sleeping till 8pm. it's nice to walk in the morning, before it gets way too hot.
i need to take the math placement test for metro. i think i will take just 2 on-line classes, cause three classes would be considered full time, i don't need to start full time just yet, and a math class will be quite easy.
i think i will go see hustle & flow with destiny on friday. i need to call her today.
i need to go to office max to get a new mouse pad, one that is made to work with a laser mouse.
my cactus GREW AN ARM.
i cleaned my room today. it's nice.
and holy shit, a police car just pulled up to the house.

Fri, 15 Jul 2005 04:37:29 GMT

today, my mom bought me an elephant.

i haven't updated in a long time. i tried to once but then firefox vanished.
summer has been good so far. boring but good. i kind of need to get a job, and i should really consider trying to learn to drive. but i don't want to.
i might start some classes in august. maybe. on-line classes at metro. but not many still have spaces left. whatever.
tomorrow i will go see charlie and the chocolate factory. pretty excited about that.

Fri, 10 Jun 2005 07:27:29 GMT

summer has been good so far. my graduation party was nice and i got tons of money, which i have spent a lot of so far. i have bought so much stuff, alot of which i ordered and haven't gotten yet. i will get most of it next week. i am such a compulsive shopper though, i have to return a lot of the dumb shit that i have bought, haha. my mom bought me a super super nice necklace that was a lot of money. i like it a lot, i feel like a princess when i wear it. haha.
i finally bought fuzz acid flowers. TWO COPIES. i can't wait to get them. i got such a good deal on amazon.co.uk i will sell one copy on ebay, i think.
my dad is buying another fantom keyboard, it is the same but smaller. this big one that we got would weigh over 100 lbs to carry around in a case. so he'll probably sell it. he also got a drum set.
we are thinking about moving... or expanding onto the house. what with my dad's mountain of guitars and whatnot, we need more space.
hmm...i think that's all i have to say for now.

Thu, 26 May 2005 23:10:19 GMT

ahhhhhh. what a crazy day.
i went over to my brothers house today, while i was in his living room i notice he had a keyboard, i was looking at it and got to thinking that i should have a key board, cause it could help me learning more music theory, etc. before i could tell my dad what i was thinking i got side tracked and didn't mention it to him. later in the day he goes "lo come up stairs i want you to see this" i assumed he was going to show me another guitar or something new he acquired for his elaborate pa system. nope. he shows me this. A Roland Fantom X8! omg, it's nice. i don't even know what all it does, but it's insane.
anyway.... the reason i was at my bro's today was to take some family pictures. i had my dad take a pic of me with me two brothers and sisters. i was going to leave with ela after that to go thrifting but she didn't want me to go with her... so i just went home. but first i went to get the pictures developed. i had one of them enlarged and then went to hallmark for a frame and box and card, etc. it is for my mom. today is her birthday. she mentioned to me that she wants a picture of all five of her kids together. i think she will really like it. my dad is no great photographer, but just the fact that we were all able to get together like that with out her knowing about it.
so today was the last day of school. great great great. i graduated and everything. i was fretting way too much. i passed american history, i passed civics, i ended up with a 3 in functions, probably a 2 in latin. (a 2! omg! eugepae!!!) and a 3 in zoologoy! but i gotta go back to school sometime tomorrow i think to get two things i left in my locker and a couple art projects that weren't yet graded, and give magistra back her plutarch, if i can find it.
anyway, going out to eat now, for some yummy pasta.

Thu, 26 May 2005 05:31:23 GMT

tomorrow is the last day of school. i will probably graduate. my counselors are pretty sure that i will. i guess if i failed my american history final i might not, but probably not gonna happen. even if i did the teacher will pass me anyway, i think. so that is big. my mom almost starts to cry just thinking about it randomly throughout the day. haha. i am not going to commencement. my graduation "party" is sunday. just family is coming pretty much. dinner at some italian place tomorrow night with mom, dad, ela, and rob.
i have no plans. no plans at all. i don't know what i'm going to do in the summer, i don't know what i'm going to do with my life. i'd consider getting a job but i still can not drive. maybe i will consider trying to learn to drive. i don't know. i'd rather move with my parents to mid-town or out of the state so i could rely on public transportation. my parents were thinking about moving. but my dad doesn't think he could get a loan, why? because he's not claiming income. grrrrrr. me and my mom are so pissed at him. i think i see where i get my 'worthless pile' gene from.
oh well. i think i will read lots of great books and continue playing guitar. maybe somehow try to figure out what i want to do with my life.
i want to go to the botanical gardens. that's what i ment to tell ela when she called me today. crap.
tomorrow: a half day of school. i hand in an art assingment, get my grades, sign yearbooks, etc. then i will go to hallmark to get my mom a birthday card.
saturday: buy yummy food for my party. clean my room.
punk turned 3 several weeks ago, and jazz turns like 9 (i think) in several days.

Mon, 18 Apr 2005 23:39:09 GMT

20 years ago I...
1.was not born
2. was not even thought of yet
3. was not alive

10 years ago I...
1. was 8.
2. had friends.
3. had OCD.

5 years ago I...
1. was in middle school
2. was learnign sign language
3. ocd had left, quickly to be replace with social anxiety.

3 years ago I...
1. listed to lots of jimmy eat world
2. was a cliche, typical, depressed teenage girl.
3. had a gpa of .05 or something like that.

1 year ago I...
1. went to Burke.
2. was doing pretty good in school.
3. actually hung out with a group of people at school, during lunch. and i liked them.

So far this year I...
1. have thought about what i'm going to do with myself after i graduate.
2. tried to make some freinds, but failed miserably and gave up.
3. went to the library and got some books on playing guitar.

Yesterday I...
1. spent lots of time working on a lame art assignment.
2. found my brown tank top that had been missing for a long time.
3. wore a skirt.

Today I...
1. went to night school and got out a lot early.
2. wore this crazy awesome four chain vintage necklace.
3. helped someone cheat on a test at night school.

Tomorrow I will...
1. hopefull go to school early to talk to this teacher. maybe i can't because of sophomore testing...
2. read a lot hopefully.
3. go to the doctors. maybe.

In the next year...
1. i will hopefully become a better guitarist. and maybe even a musician.
2. i will turn 19.
3. i will hopefully move. no not out of my parents house, into a new house with my parents.

Sun, 10 Apr 2005 03:17:14 GMT

lalalala. i'm still signed up for mnhs open mic night. there was a meeting for all the people that signed up, i had to hand in this thing that says i will play. i guess i can still back out of it if i feel the need, but then then the guy that is running the thing will have to fill up my time with his poetry. there will be lots of stuff going on i guess. most people are reading poems but some people are playing music, students' short films and artwork will be played/on display. and the mnhs literary magazine will finally be out by then so that will be there too.
i am really wanting to play end of a holiday by fairport convention. but i only know about half the song so far so i will have to learn the rest and practice it a lot lot lot. which i have been doing. other possible songs i could play are greensleeves and... uh... i don't know. i would have to practice greensleeves a little bit too though. i don't want to play that song, i really don't. i wish i had an acoustic i could play. a number of people have said i could use their acoustic but i need to have an acoustic to practice on, ya know. it's a lot harder than electric. plus what if the strings are too high, or it's just too big and i'm not use to it? i couldn't do that.. so i dunno, playing end of a holiday on electric will be kind lame. oh well.
oh and for anyone who lives in omaha, they are welcome to come. it is april 26th at millard north high school. if you're interested let me know, i will give you more details like when it starts, when i find out cause right now i don't know.
i was thinking about going to prom, but now i think i won't go. it would cost a lot of money. and my mom doesn't want me to go.
did i post pictures of kitties yet?

all 5 of the kittens are there. one is buried.

soo cute.

Thu, 31 Mar 2005 06:37:11 GMT

back to school tomorrow. i had today and yesterday off because of freshman and sophmore testing. leave children behind.. or.. leave no child behind. whatever. i still have to take a shower. i don't know how i will wake up early enough tomorrow. i have been sleeping in til noon, 1, 2... and i have homework to do. i am drawing a picture of paris hilton for art class. and my eraser isn't working on the paper that i'm using, so basically she has a very smudgy gray face. oh well. i still have homework to finish for american history, functions, and latin. my bulbs have come up, and there are actual flowers now!! they are so pretty. i'm gonna take pictures.
i am reading a book about sun ra, it is great. i only wish i would spend more time reading it.
my brother got one of those new spiffy play station things. he has this tetris-like game for it, it's awesome.
k, i've ran out of things to say.

Sun, 27 Mar 2005 04:45:34 GMT

i finished making this mix which is probably laden with rather strange volume changes and computer beeps. that's what makes a mix tape good, right? i hope so.
i also made this mix for melynda. i will probably give it her tomorrow at my grandma's easter party.
i have been feeling so confused lately. my school counselor called me into talk. she said my DAD called her because he was concerned about my grades and my mood. he thinks i'm depressed? yeah.. he thinks i'm depressed. URGHGHHHGHH. i'm not. i felt embarrassed. but he's not the only one that thinks so... yesterday this random person came up to me in the halls and told me... to smile or something. she said something about how i should be happy, even though it's raining outside i can just pretend it's sunny or something.. i don't know, it was strange. what has given me such a gloomy demeanor? do long bangs make me look depressed? i know i need to get them cut.. maybe it's the cheap conditioner i've been using. maybe limp hair makes me look depressed. maybe it's a combination of the two. i don't look goth or anything. i wear bright and basically trendy clothes, for the most part. what can i do? i can't just walk through the halls of my school all alone, smiling for no reason. that would creep people out. then people would think i'm crazy, not depressed. should i even care? i do care, it bothers me a lot. i don't know why.
whatever.