| one old and one new |
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| 11:40pm 04/01/2009 |
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old...i cant even remember who this was about...probably gary
today i disided i didnt want to even be friends with you. how could you ask me to tell you stuff then treat me the way you did! how could you say terrible things to me then ask me over and do all that stuff with me the very next day! i feel so vulnerable, i never open up to anyone...i built up walls and broke them down to keep you in my life. i dont want to be that person. i feel like such a fucking slut for what i did. i never had done that before. it's not easy for me to cope with. i can't be this person. not now not ever. i want it all to go away. i wish i never dated you. i didnt even like you in the begining. sometimes i wish i never would have dated you, it would have been alot easier. i make mistakes. i do, and i did. i never should have told anyone about what we did. but i did. and not just to keep you. i'm better off without you. you treated me like fucking shit. so many people have tryed to help but i never listened. i never did. and i should have. they were just trying to protect me. but like a dumb slut i did what i wanted to. god damn it i wish i could just grow the fuck up!
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jan 4th
i miss you quite terribly...i tell everyone that i do. i'm glad i have harley here, she is like a little part of you. i keep trying to avoid telling you that i want to be exclusive...its just hard because i know that isnt your thing and i dont know how you are going to react. neither of us are exclusive people. we both like to keep our options open but i only do that to protect my heart and that night before you left when i told you pretty much everything you broke that barrier and now it is even hard to think about kissing someone else. with the way you talk about sleeping with other people it makes me want to cry...but i know as soon as i cry over you i will know i shouldnt have anything to do with you. i want you to catch me before i move on. |
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| 03:23am 23/11/2006 |
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mood:  irate music: pcd
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i liked you better before the drugs
before you disided that there was no worth to life
before you simply
gave up
causing hearts to break at the death of you
the death of who you used to be.
i liked me better after the drugs
when i grew up
saw meaning to life and disided not to give up
to become more alive
to wake up
even if it means the loss of security.
life used to be all about it
the ijustwanttobecool
a prase so used in thought, it acts as one word
we think it so much we lose individuality
and we say we are just being who we are.
who they are. |
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| 07:49pm 31/10/2006 |
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me+bloom=over
new cheer tryouts=made it (im a cheerleader if you didnt get that)
boys=lame
-i met one that looks just like bloom the other day. he is mormon, but i dunno.
-then there is another travis, but he smokes, i dont date smokers
thats life |
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| mexicans can fix cars....soposively |
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| 04:49pm 02/01/2006 |
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mood:  excited music: stickwityou by PCD
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by the end of this post i should tell you about my 2005...if i get to it
so anyways my new years went pretty good actually. i went over to my friend ari's house for her black and white party, i must admit that i did look cute that night, too bad we didnt take any pictures. and at the begining of the night me and ari were both sitting on mike's lap because well he is a cute wrestler, but then around 10 i think these guys who i didnt know, sam and travis, came, i would have known them but they go to doherty which i dont go too, but anyways they came and at first i was kinda shy which is soooo unlike me because im like a very very loud obnoxious person, especially with guys, so then ari was like "lets play spin the bottle" (indeed it is a younger person game but i guess kissing people you dont know breaks the ice or something (by the way i hate the term 'breaks the ice' i dont get it)) and there was music on so of course i was dancing like a whore, cuz thats what i do. so i ended up making out with mike (nothing new) and kissing travis on the cheek. so later they disided to turn on some movie, dawn of the dead, i think. but anyways so i disided to go sit on travis because he was laying where i was sitting before and i played with his hair and all, then for some reason he got up so i layed down where he was then he came back and sat on me, not sure why but okay, well i dont have abs of steel so after a while it started to hurt so we switched...and ari sent me a text message that said "you are so flirting with him" and me beeing me i denied it, even though i was. so then ari kept telling me to just kiss him and get it over with so after a while i gave him a kiss on the cheek and then a little bit after that me and him started making out. so around midnight, i got to be very comfterable with him so yeah and then we were watching the ball drop and 5 seconds before midnight i started making out with him so people say i cheeted which i didnt, so after that i went into the bedroom with him (and ari and mike) so ari and mike were making out on the bed and so were me and travis (it was a king sized bed), and the people in the other room were watching degrassi, well me and ari both watch degrassi so whenever they had a "degrassi moment" we would stop making out with our boys and say which one it was and we also would whenever a new eposode came on and some commercials too. so around 1 mike had to leave so it was me and travis in the room (the door was open) and sam comes into the doorway without a shirt on and omg he looked so much like zane so i kinda freeked out in my mind cuz zane was creepy and then he disides to take his pants off and wears them around his ancles so i was laughing and so was travis and them me and travis made out more and sam closed the door, but it didnt really matter cuz as far as we went was making out, and then we started talking about jayme (cuz he used to like my friend jayme and he was trying to get over her so i wanted to know the story), it was nice, i like talking, well i like making out too but still, so around 2 he had to leave so ari was saying bye to sam and i was saying bye to travis when they couldnt get their car started, so sam beeing mexican was like "im mexican i can fix cars" so he got in the driver's seat and after trying a few times it started and no it wasnt because he is mexican it was luck! so after he left rebecca, ari, molly, kayla, and me were left and i walked into the room and was like "i really like that boy" and ari was like "well yeah!" and i said "its cuz like im such a hook up person me liking someone is different" and molly was laughing because she knew what i meant. so then after watching some south park me and ari went into the king sized bed to go to sleep, molly, kayla, and rebecca were on the couch so me and ari talked a little bit then went to sleep. so that was my new years
a look at 2005
january was a bad month. i didnt have plans for that new years so i stayed home, lame me. but then on the 19th Sara died, it hit me again last night and i started bawling. i miss her so much, i cant believe she isnt here. but me and david did start getting really close that month
febuary i had no boyfriend for valentines day so of course i hated it, so much, then a week later i went to vail and met a really nice, cute guy in a hott tub, i still hate myself for not getting his phone number, but i have a picture of him in my cell phone.
march nothing special happened
april was the month i went to pheonix for a day, i basically flew there in my uncle's plane with my family had lunch, played mini golf, had dinner then flew back that night, it was nice to feel so rich.
may again nothing special
june school got out, it was nice to have a break
july is when me and david were pretty close, jenna came and i really loved meeting her, it made me happy to think of Sara so much without knowing it
august, david asked me out for the first time on the 29th, it made me pretty happy
september, homecomming week! yays! i loved that week especially because home coming was on my birthday, and adam really hit on me that night, right in front of david
october, i finally got to meet alot of catherine's friends, like drew and jared and people, it was great because i ended up getting pretty close to most of them
november, i think me and david broke up in this month, but i dont remember, but then he asked me out 5 days later and i went out with him again for a while then we broke up again
december! best month! i started hanging out with drew, at like midnight and sneeking out with him. i got really drunk for the first time, and was extreamly hung over the next day. i went farther than i would have liked to with him (but i am still a virgin), and met a boy that i thought i liked, but the more i thought about it the less i did, i guess he was just a drunk hook up, but he was nice. and i also met a boy i really like, but it was on the last day of the year, too bad he is moving in a month. oh and catherine started hating me because soposively im stealing all her friends, umm no i just hang out with them a little bit, and the boys happen to think im hot, no harm there. oh oh and i met ari who is for surely my best friend!!!!!! |
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| 03:35pm 26/12/2005 |
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mood:  blah
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yes christmas story time.
so on chistmas eve, i woke up at 3 pm. good good. i kept dreaming some well interesting things, about my guy friends, my hot guy friends, its odd that i am dreaming about it now. but anyways back to story, i got up and went downstairs, well my mom had been feeling sick the day before and i thought i would get brownie points (meaning more money) if i helped her with the dishes while she was away. so i basically washed all of the pots and pans in the sink. when she got home she kept giving me things to do, like trimming the bottom of the flowers. so i did everything she told me to do because well i want alot of shopping money. so around 7:45 my parents were like "oh! lets go look at christmas lights." i must admit i really didnt want to because me and my brothers dont get along, at all, anymore. so as we were looking at lights someone would say something and someone elce would yell at them for what they said, we argued about everything. so when we got home, after that misurable trip, my mom wanted to make hot chocolate, like real hot chocolate so i had to stir the thing (no big deal), then my mom goes over and writes a check and hands it to me, i was right, i got $250 from her then. then she put $20 in everybodys stockings. (so we are up to $270 + $40 for babysitting + $40-ish for wrapping presents so that is $350-ish) then i was up in my room on my computer later that night and i got to open a money box thing where i got $60 so now we are at $410-ish.
christmas morning, ugh, my little brother woke me up at 7:54-ish and i did not want to get up at all, then my mom disided to do her hair before we opened presents, so i ended up getting a virgin mary liquires shirt which i love!!! another $50, a watch, and some other less important presents. then i come upstairs and get all prettied up for opening presents at my grandma's house. so i get there, and most people are already there so i talk to my cousins for a while about stupid stuff, then we start opening presents. i got yammas (P.J.s), slippers, a face mask and hand soap from bath and body works. so i did okay this year....really good on money, and im going shopping soon, yay.
that night me and my (favorite) cousin molly talked for at least an hour before we fell asleep. i like talking to her, i can tell her everything, and its great that me and her are like going through the same things (like almost beeing "active") except she is almost "active" with her boyfriend and i am with a few guy friends, oops. and we laughed about chochless panties, and just stupid stuff, its great. |
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| would someone please excite me about christmas? |
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| 03:44pm 20/12/2005 |
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mood:  depressed music: the "im so sick of love songs" song i dont remember the name
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im just not into it this year. but free stuff is good, especially free stuff that i like. i know that i am getting a shirt that says "virgin mary liquers" on the back with a picture of like a virgin mary statue on the front, which i am in fact excited about, that shirt is gonna kick butt. but yes, other than that no excitement.
+ side:
+i am finally finished with finals
+i get to have some guy friends ova soon, which i love
+i have an elevator which i can stop inbetween floors, which is good for guys beeing over
+i got to know ari last saterday, i love her
+i kissed a cute boy saterday night
+i have lost shit loads of weight since the begining of the year, well 10 pounds but thats alot when you are loosing it the healthy way
- side:
-i also kissed an not so cute boy saterday
-CC hates me for kissing the cute boy again yesterday
-dad is home for hollidays, which means no kissing boys when he is around
-david is beeing a complete ass hole but at least i dumped his ass
-christmas isnt exciting this year
-i let some girl that i met saterday night cut my hair and she fucked it up so now i have been having to fix it every morning but my mom hasnt noticed that it is fucked up yet which is good
~no particular side:
~i am single
~might go shopping tomorrow, i want to go with my mom, just cuz im hating people right now, cuz im in a depressing
~i have been hit on everyday since i have been single (and that so does suck sometimes!!!!!)
so yes, that is my life lately, its good to put it out there, its stress relieving. |
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| 07:47pm 05/12/2005 |
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mood: crushed and hurt music: mtv
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okay i think i will start with what happened today.
so today i disided that it was time to break up with my boyfriend. all last week i would cry when i talked to him on the phone or online, so i was so heartbroken about everything. and he kinda likes my friend aubry, i have a hard time hanging out with her now adays because of it. so i knew it was time, but i really didnt want to, before my knees were shaking and i got all week and i felt like throwing up i was so scared. when i broke up with him he had to lean in to hear what i was saying i was so quiet about it, i feel like the worse person in the world. i walked like 5 feet to my friends and just sat down on the floor since i couldnt take standing up anymore, i almost cryed then, but i didnt. as soon as me and genieca started pase-ing (to keep my mind off the break-up) i would see someone and just start crying and then tell them what happened. genieca felt so bad for me she called up her mom and said that they are going to buy me a big stuffed animal and a balloon tonight, i hope it helps, but it might just give me something to squeeze when i see him, i'll probly start crying when i get it. and now he is beeing a complete butt about it, he changed his myspace name thing (which he often does when something changes) to "David, You Got rid of me, you can stop pretending" which just made me cry again. i thought he wouldnt hurt me anymore, i thought he couldnt but i was wrong. gowsh i hate this! but when i got home i talked to my mom, she got me mcdonalds but my brother was driving the crap out of me and i almost cryed again. grrrrs. but my mom was pritty cool about it all she told me what to do tomorrow and not to feel bad, but i cant help it, david bought some oxycodine from aubry right after, i hate that he trys to make me feel guilty, everytime we break up and i think people have noticed.
weekend: i spent it alone, i was going to have rebecca come spend the night saterday night but it snowed, alot, i think it said 10 inches. but i got online and talked to ppl alot, david and me argued, figures. but i talked to dillon, i miss him so much, he got expelled so i miss him alot. i also talked to mike but he is just horney.
i think i will swear myself off boys for now. |
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| 08:15pm 07/11/2005 |
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mood: bummed
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i dont know...david like hates me. it sux. he says everything i ever said to him was a lie and it was not. but i dunno...for some reason i still like dillon...even though people have told me to watch out for him. i think i will have to watch out for him...and ive been single for two days and already people are saying that i fucked dillon in his car...no effing way. i hope he isnt in it for sex because he isnt going to get it. ive disided that im not ready for the responcibility that comes along with it. send some hugs to make me feel better about david. |
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| im just whining so you dont have to read this...i dont see why anyone would want to |
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| 06:49pm 02/11/2005 |
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mood: crushed music: 98.9
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okay...first of all...i dont like that whole 'my lj' tab...i think it is compleatly pointless.
well i have disided to try out for cheerleading in april...its something that i have always wanted to be...a cheerleader that is...and its for me...not for anyone elce...therefore im making the desision to do it...no matter what anyone says...its for me and this year i have been being me and i have the cheerleader attitude and now am in shape egnough to be one...its my choise and no one is going to change it.
so im sure your wondering why i babbled in that last paragraph...well...i was just talking to david and he was being kinda grumpy...so i was telling him a bunch of things that he doesnt care about (like always)...and i was like 'have i told you that im trying out for cheerleading in april' and he was like 'why?' so i said 'to keep in shape, this is the best shape that i have ever been in and i want to keep it up, and i have wanted to be a cheerleader since i was little' so then he got all anger about it so i asked him 'whats the big deal anyways?' and he said something like (i have to say something like otherwise he will say 'i didnt say that') 'i dont want to think about it and i havent in a while'...okay well i figured out that it was because Sara wanted to be a cheerleader...and i get that it may make him a little upset to think about that but i dont see why he would get mad at me and tell me it is a stupid decision. im not doing it for the aleged popularity that you get out of it...i wouldnt...and i hate one of the girls on the squad...im doing it for me...its a goal to me...ive always wanted to be a cheerleader. so i was quite for a while and he was like 'i have to go shower' so i kind of had an attitude because he was like being mean to me before so i was like 'okay.' and he said 'whats wrong?' and i said 'nothing' so he said 'you sound pissed off or something' and i was like 'so?' and he said 'i love you' and me, still being pissy disided to be a bitch and said 'okay' then he hung up on me...what kind of person does that? i would never do that...i would stay on the phone and be really sad and might start crying because i really do love him but when im in a bad mood im not about to tell anyone that i love them...so i got online and saw that he was online so i said 'i love you too' well he didnt say anything so i said 'im sorry im just not good with sertain people being mean to me' and he still didnt say anything so i said 'fine if you dont want to talk to me' and he still hasnt said anything. i dont fricken understand this boy! he is an ass to me about nothing then thells me he loves me then wont talk to me...i know what your thinking 'he is playing games with my head'...but i get how bad that hurts so im not going to confront him about it...and Sara was his best friend...and now she is gone...so i see how bad that can hurt...but i still dont get why he would be mad at me for it! he doesnt tell me anything...well at least about him...he tells me things about other people but i dont know anything about him, you can even ask him if i do and he will say that i dont.
oh and the reason im writing in here when i would usually be saying all this on the phone with someone: the person that i talk to about everything is david...i dont talk to anyone elce about anything that bugs me. so lately i have been on the search for a new guy best friend...the search is going good...i dont really know though...i think mitch is trying to get the job...but there is nothing special about him...like there is about david. oh and the other person who might have a chance at being my new best friend is jared yanez...i have been talking to him for like a week now and already he is such an awsome person but i did go out with his brother...and i dont know which guys i can trust as just friends. so i dunno. |
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| i hate boys |
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| 05:46pm 25/10/2005 |
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mood: pissed off music: the real world
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okay so i was talking to my x trevor online...omgsh he was being suck a butt! here are some exerpts:
Xo Just4kickS xo [5:01 P.M.]: okay....mine and david's two month is this saterday and we are goen to jenna's sweet 16 and it is mulan rouge themed and i get to dress like a slut and no one can say anything so im very very excited
SublimeTokeJo420 [5:01 P.M.]: lol okay
SublimeTokeJo420 [5:02 P.M.]: how many people do you think you will make out with?
Xo Just4kickS xo [5:02 P.M.]: one
Xo Just4kickS xo [5:02 P.M.]: just david
SublimeTokeJo420 [5:02 P.M.]: lol
SublimeTokeJo420 [5:02 P.M.]: okay
Xo Just4kickS xo [5:02 P.M.]: we were on a break that night gowsh!
Xo Just4kickS xo [5:02 P.M.]: get over it
Xo Just4kickS xo [5:02 P.M.]: already
SublimeTokeJo420 [5:02 P.M.]: lol what are you talking about?
Xo Just4kickS xo [5:03 P.M.]: the night that i made out with 3 guys and you got pissed
SublimeTokeJo420 [5:03 P.M.]: and?
SublimeTokeJo420 [5:03 P.M.]: what about it?
Xo Just4kickS xo [5:03 P.M.]: since then you are like so how many people are you gonna make out with....gowsh it was just that night im so totally over being that kind of person
SublimeTokeJo420 [5:04 P.M.]: umm okay...i dont realy care anymore about that and i wasnt even talking about that.......and you can do what ever you want to do bc i am not ur boss
okay and then we got started talking about sex and how i dont really like the idea of it because it seems gross and how i think dicks are gross and i was giggley so i was just playen and well here:
SublimeTokeJo420 [5:08 P.M.]: i dont know.....im just going over there to chill....god i love driving my tahho
Xo Just4kickS xo [5:08 P.M.]: your gonna go have sex with your gross dick...haha
SublimeTokeJo420 [5:09 P.M.]: gross dick?
Xo Just4kickS xo [5:09 P.M.]: cha
SublimeTokeJo420 [5:09 P.M.]: okay wow, joie i realy thought you could be mature about this type of stuff but i guess not....
Xo Just4kickS xo [5:09 P.M.]: im just playing gowsh
SublimeTokeJo420 [5:10 P.M.]: umm okay....
Xo Just4kickS xo [5:11 P.M.]: get over yourself its not like your mature....ive just turned so back into myself since you...you fooked me up and totally changed me
SublimeTokeJo420 [5:11 P.M.]: wait wait wait...me changing you? how so? and how can you sit there and say im not mature?
SublimeTokeJo420 [5:13 P.M.]: i never asked you to change
Xo Just4kickS xo [5:13 P.M.]: the entire time we were going out (the first time) i was worried you would stop liking me so i kept changing myself to be more sexual so that you would keep liking me
SublimeTokeJo420 [5:13 P.M.]: and believe me if you changed when i wa with you, mabey things could have gone alot better
SublimeTokeJo420 [5:13 P.M.]: more sexual?
Xo Just4kickS xo [5:13 P.M.]: yes
SublimeTokeJo420 [5:13 P.M.]: i never said you couldnt be sexual
Xo Just4kickS xo [5:14 P.M.]: yeah i have gotten alot less sexual since you...like alot less
Xo Just4kickS xo [5:14 P.M.]: and i like myself better now because i dont rely on a guy to make me feel good about myself
SublimeTokeJo420 [5:16 P.M.]: seriously, mabey if you stop blaming your own problems on me then people would be a little nicer to you....and plus you never had to realy on a guy to make yourself feel better, i said you looked fine alot.....you seriously need to get over yourself, i dont need to because i have all my shit togather.......you never had to be sexual.......i never asked that of you
then i just logged off to call david because i wanted to complain about trevor and he wasnt there so now im like grrrrrrrr and want to hit someone.
me and david are still good by the way...i love him! |
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| 07:26pm 22/10/2005 |
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mood:  bored
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so i am boredddd out of my fooking mind...waiting for someone to log on to AIM or for music to play on ma' radio so i can dance like a whore...haha so if you have AIM IM me at xo just4kicks xo
much love!
( picturez from snowday ) |
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| eeehhh |
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| 09:44pm 02/10/2005 |
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mood:  chipper
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thought i would give ya'll a little surprise...here is a picture of me and my boyfriend!
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| update |
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| 04:30pm 30/09/2005 |
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mood: crushed music: *nothingness* hmm i though i turned on my radio
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so i havent been on here in like months so i thought i would update since i am so stressed i just cryed. so im going out with david right now...perfict match hu? seeing is how he is my best friend and all. i wish it was all perfict...all this week i have just been stressed about this relationship it is that bad...i want to go cry about it...again. so everything was perfict...well not so perfict...like we had our little arguments and all but we got over them fast. so he is completely honest with me...because as long as he tells me i wont flip out about something...even though i wouldnt flip out because i love him so much...well anywho...so earlier this week er last week i dunno i dont remember...so i was talking to david online and he said he felt like an ass whole...so me being inquizitive asked why...(wrong thing to ask) so he wouldnt tell me for a little while then we were just talking and he said "what would you say if i told you i like someone" so i said "ask who" then david said "and?" so i said "i dunno" so then i started freaking out a little but we were talking online so i was like wooh...so i was working on a project at the time...so later he said "i think i might like someone" (i feaked out so bad there)and i said okay then he said "it doesnt bother you?" and i said "it does, you could tell if we were talking on the phone but i dont want to show it now" so he said something like thought so, yeah i dont remember what i said but then he said "i might like a freshmen, but i love you." (like that helped at all...common your perfict boyfriend that you love so much just told you that he likes a girl that isnt you...nothing can make you feel better after that) so after that i left it alone for a while...well when i was talking to him. so the next day david comes up to me with a bottle full of a darkish kind of liquid in his hand that he is drinking so im like okay its probably just a coke or something...haha it wasnt! i give him a kiss and i could smell the alcahol on him...likt thats smart drinking when your at school...so he told me that it was rum mixed with tea...so i was like okay he told me so no big deal...welli could also smell cigarrets on him...(oh yeah he quit smoking for me) so i was like were you smoking...he said no so i was like okay. then adam comes up to me and david and is like "do you guys want to go out to lunch today?" so of course we said yes so then adam was like "do you want to come with me to move my car?" david had to go put that alcahol shit in his locker but i went with adam because i had to get away from david because of the whole thing about that freshmen and all. well when i go with adam i guess he could tell that something was wrong...well i ended up telling him the whole story about talking to david and finding out about that freshmen chick...wrong thing to do! adam was so sweet and saying stuff like "i dunno why he would like a freshmen chick when he has you...(some words here dont remember them though)you are one of the prittyest girls ive seen" and "if you need a rebound guy im here and i have a car and i can drive..." so i was like okay...we go back inside and adam goes up to david and starts talking about why david would like a freshmen when he has me. well david storms off because i told adam (what? i didnt want to cry if i would have kept it to myself i would have been crying at school!) so then i go to my first period...did yoga and then went to spanish well in spanish i was telling the story to kat er rebecca er someone durring our 'break' and i was standing back on my heals (bad move once again) and i broke a heal! grrrr i hated that! so i go to math after that class and durring my 'break' in there david is at lunch so i was like hmm ill go talk to him and find out if he is still mad at me...well he said he was 'kinda' mad at me but then he said (dum dum dum) "im sopose to break up with you tomorrow" (well tomorrow was yesterday and that day was our one month anaversery type shit...i know uber korny but still) i almost started crying and i was ready to run back to my class when he said "but i wouldnt do that" whew huge relief! but i was still nervis about it. so the next day (which was yesterday)we went out for chinease with adam because we have a two hour lunch on thursdays...so afterwards we came back and hung out some and kissed some and yeah...so after i was still uber nervis...even after school so i went up to the road with vickie and kat so they could smoke (i didnt smoke) and i talked with them for a while...then i went ova to cc's to finish a project but no one cares bout that so...today i was at lunch and really upset still about that freshmen girl (i feel like i did something wrong or like she has something that i dont or whatever) so i was with david and a bunch of people and this girl sam...well sam came up to me and said "i need to talk to you" so i was like okay so i go over there and she tells me to break up with david because he is planning on breaking up with me next friday...holly crap...i freaked out! i yelled at andrew and was a total bitch to people...it was about time because i have been so good all year and i just exploded! then a bug was in my hair and i freeked out yeah yeah girlie shit. so anyways i end up getting dragged down a hill by my feet and getting a huge grass stain all over my ass! so i go to self defence and we i was talking to mary-kate because we had some free time er something and i didnt want to tell her what was wrong so she just gave me a hug and i was so close to crying (like tears in my eyes about to fall out) so i let go and looked up and fanned my face (girlie way to stop crying)...and i know the exact thing that made me cry...i am so worried that he never meant it when he told me he loved me everyday and when we were talking about years from now and getting married and shit (i know again korny but it started as a joke last year when someone told us that we were gonna get married) and i told him things that i truely meant and if it was all just an act then i was compleatly stupid for all of that. i had to do my kicking test so i took out alot of anger and resendment and upsetness on that...so yeah. (skipping a period where nothing happened). so i get home and i was sopose to go shopping tonight (yeah i didnt really want to but hey shopping is shopping) and my mom wanted to see my grades before we went...well im failing math which made her blow up so now im not going shopping and this week has sucked major ass.
sorry if you read all that i was just venting so yeah you didnt have to. |
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Read 3 - Post |
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| because i feel that i cant write what is going on... |
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| 09:53pm 23/05/2005 |
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mood: blah
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people have been giving me shit about entrys...soooo im gonna keep them out of my journal! comment to be added!
YOU MIGHT BE CUT! CHECK MY FRIENDS LIST...IF YOU ARNT ON THERE REMOVE ME FROM YOUR FRIENDS LIST!!!
UPDATE: if you love me...and you want to read my lj (again), leave a comment and i shat consitter you! love all yas! |
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| 06:22pm 20/05/2005 |
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mood: cynical music: law and order: svu
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so i went to talk to my mom...and she is always making fun of me because i have small boobs and well heres arnt so small. so i had taken off my bra cuz it was driving me crazy and i was like 'so mom how do i look without a bra on' and she said 'your boobs look so soft and cuddlely'...weird? i think so.
sodamised...hmm funny word. not a funny idea...just a fun word to say...you know you want to say it!
well i cant do anything with tannar, miss vix, and steven tomorrow...mom is being a bitch and wont let me...and i even gave her bayleys...hmmm i think i shall make myself some coffee with bayleys in it!
what is the state bird of kentucky? (yes that commercial did come on...u know the ihop one)
svu is on...thanx celbs for getting me hooked on this show!
i miss kissing tannar...he is soooo good at it! (and according to him i am too haha i know im a slut!) |
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| 04:50pm 19/05/2005 |
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mood: chipper
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since this school year is comming to an end (soooo totally excited!)(haha what is it like 5 school days left?) ummmm where was i? (celebratory note...PETER IS NOW A SENIOR!) o i am going to make a thngy about my accomplishments of this year.
accomplishments (looks important cuz its underlined doesnt it?)
i went out with one of the guys on my people i am compatible with (that sheet that we got right before valentines day)
i learned what the only sentence i can say in french means. (it means will you sleep with me tonight?) haha i know...im a slut.
i got two dates to snowball (but lost them both them in a time period of two weeks)
i went out with one guy just to piss off a girl i didnt like (guy was joey)
i had my first cig
i got drunk for the first time
i skipped for the first time
i became friends with totally awsome sluts
i have been told i look and act like one of the biggest sluts in LP history (bridget)
i pissed of kt roseburrow soooo bad twice
(i shall put more on here as i think of them) |
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| plans |
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| 06:44pm 18/05/2005 |
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mood:  blank
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later i will be posting some pointless yet fun accomplishments of this year. |
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| 08:14pm 14/05/2005 |
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mood:  crazy
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SweetAnSourKiss [7:53 P.M.]: Hey... Its Vickie... How are you
Unusual2210 [7:53 P.M.]: good
Unusual2210 [7:53 P.M.]: you?
SweetAnSourKiss [7:54 P.M.]: pretty well
I am at Joies and we are being stupid! lol
SweetAnSourKiss [7:54 P.M.]: I saw you this morning
More like around 1:15... but yeah
Unusual2210 [7:55 P.M.]: yeah i rode my bike into monument last night and was doing crazy shit all night and then i came home on it around the time you saw me
SweetAnSourKiss [7:55 P.M.]: Yeah...
I was going in to town... then to the mall for a date
SweetAnSourKiss [7:55 P.M.]: So how are you doing?
Unusual2210 [7:55 P.M.]: good
Unusual2210 [7:56 P.M.]: asked already but ill answer again
SweetAnSourKiss [7:56 P.M.]: oh... sry
Unusual2210 [7:56 P.M.]: lol
Unusual2210 [7:56 P.M.]: its all good hun
SweetAnSourKiss [7:56 P.M.]: lol
SweetAnSourKiss [7:56 P.M.]: hun
Unusual2210 [7:56 P.M.]: oh my fault
Unusual2210 [7:56 P.M.]: ill try not to say it to you
SweetAnSourKiss [7:57 P.M.]: no its ok
SweetAnSourKiss [7:57 P.M.]: I dont care
SweetAnSourKiss [7:57 P.M.]: it was cute
Unusual2210 [7:57 P.M.]: oh ok
SweetAnSourKiss [7:57 P.M.]: yep
SweetAnSourKiss [7:58 P.M.]: so what are you doing today
Unusual2210 [8:02 P.M.]: nuthin....noah is coming to get me and we are gonna do some crazy shit down in monument
SweetAnSourKiss [8:03 P.M.]: cool....What are you guys ganna do exactly?
Unusual2210 [8:03 P.M.]: close off roads and stuff
SweetAnSourKiss [8:03 P.M.]: cool
Unusual2210 [8:03 P.M.]: yerp
SweetAnSourKiss [8:04 P.M.]: wait,,,, who is ganna get you?
Unusual2210 [8:04 P.M.]: noah
SweetAnSourKiss [8:04 P.M.]: got it
Unusual2210 [8:04 P.M.]: yerp
Unusual2210 [8:04 P.M.]: i doubt you know him
SweetAnSourKiss [8:04 P.M.]: I dont but thats ok
Unusual2210 [8:05 P.M.]: yeah hes black
Unusual2210 [8:05 P.M.]: lol
Unusual2210 [8:06 P.M.]: hes like my brotha
SweetAnSourKiss [8:06 P.M.]: nice
SweetAnSourKiss [8:06 P.M.]: Do you still hang out with Jeremy and Peter?
Unusual2210 [8:06 P.M.]: no not really
Unusual2210 [8:06 P.M.]: i hate peter
Unusual2210 [8:06 P.M.]: me and jeremy are cool
Unusual2210 [8:06 P.M.]: but i dont hang with him
SweetAnSourKiss [8:07 P.M.]: why do you hate Peter?
Unusual2210 [8:07 P.M.]: cause he is trying to be me now that im gone and he is a fag and he gos with a girl that looks like a guy
SweetAnSourKiss [8:07 P.M.]: jenna?
Unusual2210 [8:08 P.M.]: yeah him
SweetAnSourKiss [8:08 P.M.]: joie says that she loves u for that
Unusual2210 [8:08 P.M.]: lol
Unusual2210 [8:08 P.M.]: she does
Unusual2210 [8:08 P.M.]: i hate that chick
SweetAnSourKiss [8:08 P.M.]: hey its joie
SweetAnSourKiss [8:08 P.M.]: she hates me bc kt hates me
Unusual2210 [8:08 P.M.]: yeah
Unusual2210 [8:09 P.M.]: well i hate jenna so she can fuck off
Unusual2210 [8:09 P.M.]: and i hate peter and if she wants to she can have him stick up for her
Unusual2210 [8:09 P.M.]: i wont hit a girl but ill knock peter the fuck out
SweetAnSourKiss [8:09 P.M.]: its so funny looking cuz peter is sooooo skinny and well jenna isnt
Unusual2210 [8:10 P.M.]: lol
Unusual2210 [8:10 P.M.]: yeah she isnt
Unusual2210 [8:10 P.M.]: she a big guy
SweetAnSourKiss [8:10 P.M.]: lol yeah she is
SweetAnSourKiss [8:11 P.M.]: omgsh brittany, vickie, and steven all talked to tannar today and told him he should go out with me again and then i was like sorry they are all horney
Unusual2210 [8:11 P.M.]: ah ok
Unusual2210 [8:11 P.M.]: your stupid
Unusual2210 [8:11 P.M.]: just so you know
Unusual2210 [8:11 P.M.]: lol
SweetAnSourKiss [8:11 P.M.]: i know im stupid
Unusual2210 [8:12 P.M.]: noah needs to hurry the fuck up
SweetAnSourKiss [8:12 P.M.]: lol im sorry
Unusual2210 [8:12 P.M.]: me too
Unusual2210 [8:12 P.M.]: but i g2g eat
Unusual2210 [8:12 P.M.]: bbl
Unusual2210 [8:12 P.M.]: peace
SweetAnSourKiss [8:12 P.M.]: bye
HAHAHAHAHAHA JENNA IS A BITCH |
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| 07:09pm 13/05/2005 |
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mood: ditzy music: mtv
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so over-all today was a good day! (thank ya sara!)
1st period-went faster than it usually does...heck yes!
(passsing period-i miss mike comming to the class and getten kayla! errr but i had a headace so pierce gave me alive!)
2nd period-also went faster than usual...(more) heck yes!
3rd period-i was cold so mike let me wear his sweat-shirt-thingy...(it smelled sooooo good!!!)...and i passed notes with cathren...fun!
4th period-i got to hang out with tannar for a lil while...at the begining he wrote 'nigger' on my leg in a black-light-pen then later he wrote 'fake' on my chest (they are soooo real!!!) so i was like they are real wanna feel? and he was like sure and i was like no. so then mitch took the pen and wrote 'i want fake boobs' on my arm so i was like let me see the pen and then i was like what should i write on tannar's face and britany was like write 'sex toy' and i was like no, but i finally did...lol...(oh and earlier i drew a heart on his face)...he is such a cutie...i want him!
5th period-not much happened.
!!!I SOOOOOOO MISS KISSING!!!
okay after school i saw that i had forgotten to turn my straitening iorn (for my hair) off and it was up against my moisturizer so i was like shit and it melted it a little bit so i was like shit and i couldnt get it open cuz it had melted closed so i got my pocket knife and finally got it open...heck yes! |
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