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"Rawkstar"
Best viewed: IE 1280x1024
Created by: Lisa Monique
from Amazing Designs
Background by: XvJynx

Y October 23, 2003 ¤ 9:55 am Y

Wow. I havent written in here in a long time. I find it amusing that my internet 'persona' is in absolutely no way a reflection of my real self WHATSOEVER. I swear to god, looking at my livejournal you'd think I was a 14 year old girl into christina aguilera and limited too. ...thats sort of upsetting in a way.

And what the fuck people, I had absolutely ZERO go-gaia referrals from that banner I put up. How useless are you? Dont you know i NEEEEED THE FAKE INTERNET GOOOOLD!!!!

Please dont take me away, I'm sane, I promise.

13 meow meows Y >^. .^<

Y October 11, 2003 ¤ 2:05 pm Y



this is so stupidly fun, im seriously addicted. join. now. even if you hate anime..i hate anime. but its fun. :D

5 meow meows Y >^. .^<

Y August 1, 2003 ¤ 2:39 pm Y
Y Rainbow Dash. My latest pixely art creature. :D



I just finished her. She's one of the new 2003 My Little Ponies. Shes so cute I want to puke. I think shes probably my best pixel creature thus far. Yes you can adopt her..but please tell me and please please please give me credit and don't edit her. I made a pony base - if you want to make your own ponies just let me know and I can give you the base.

I love My Little Ponies, its really unhealthy. I think I'm going to draw the entire 2003 line. :D

EDIT: Minty joined my herd too. :D As per request..a green pony.

15 meow meows Y >^. .^<

Y July 5, 2003 ¤ 4:27 am Y

Good birthday. :) Even though Greg didn't get home till 5, we still did a bunch. :) I was afraid I wouldnt be able to see the fireworks because there were HUGE thunderstorms all day but they went away. He took me to Macaroni Grill for dinner. It was yummmm.. I got free tiramisu. And happy birthday sung to me in Italian. Greg was slightly embarassed by all the attention that garnered, I think. We went downtown for a bit too for the fourth of july thing. Went to the top of the parking deck and saw the fireworks. I love fireworks. Fireworks = good.

7 meow meows Y >^. .^<

Y July 5, 2003 ¤ 3:12 am Y



I spent all night working on her. Shes rather pretty, no? I <3 bettie page.

Y >^. .^<

Y July 4, 2003 ¤ 6:30 am Y

its my birthday. woot.

4 meow meows Y >^. .^<

Y June 25, 2003 ¤ 11:37 am Y

I got woken up today from my happy, dead sleep by a great big loud knock on the door. I was REALLY freaking pissed.

Until I looked outside, and there was a box from godiva chocolates. A half-pound box from my friend for my birthday.

I cannot even begin to explain to you how strong the urge is to eat them all right now. I fucking love Godiva. Nobody ever buys me giant boxes of good chocolates like they do in the movies, so needless to say I was thrilled. :D

10 meow meows Y >^. .^<

Y June 24, 2003 ¤ 3:25 pm Y

Yea, hi lj? You fucking suck. Why the fuck people pay for this piece of shit service i have NO FUCKING IDEA.

Y >^. .^<

Y June 24, 2003 ¤ 10:16 am Y
Y opinions por favor.



I need some opinions on this. Its for [info]blend_challenge. I like it but i feel like something is missing. hmmm...

2 meow meows Y >^. .^<

Y June 22, 2003 ¤ 12:23 pm Y

I walked to dairy queen today. Nevermind that it takes about 3 minutes each way, but I walked. This is how I rationalize getting a large sundae with extra peanut butter, hot fudge, and whipped creme. But I kinda liked walking. It made me feel like less of a lazy slob for 5 minutes of my life.

2 meow meows Y >^. .^<

Y June 21, 2003 ¤ 8:59 am Y
Y Bringing out my inner 14 year old girl



I am such a fucking teenybopper at heart its not even funny. I spent 20 minutes perfecting my new photoshop skill. Making annoying, glittery text. hahaha I am such a loser.

5 meow meows Y >^. .^<
Y music: Tatu - All The Things She Said (3:34)

Y June 9, 2003 ¤ 5:18 am Y

I miss Greg. :( It makes me a sad bird, having to be away from him for all this time. Yes, I get to see my friends and buy alot of clothes, but FUCK, SEEING JONAH FOR LIKE, 3 DAYS A WEEK IS NOT WORTH THIS FUCKING AGONY. !!! :(:( I can't sleep correctly. It just feels wrong, I feel lonely, I have nothing and no one to grab onto. Just little me all alone and cold in a big, big bed. I miss his arms around me and being able to curl up against him and nuzzle up against his neck, and I miss my good morning kisses, my goodnight kisses, and all the kisses in between. I've developed a disturbinbg habit of wrapping my sheets very tightly around me while snuggling up to the biggest pile of pillows and stuffed animals I can conjure. I like to pretend its him, unfortunately, 3 pillows and a few stuffed dogs don't really foot the bill. Dusty, furry plush things do not equal my warm, comforting boyfriend, no matter how tired I am. :( I'm sorry I never talk to you for long amounts. :/ I can only call you for like, 3 minutes at a timw and must be distracted by something for every other moment of the day or else I sink into a terrible 3 am depression. I feel very incomplete without you here. I keep getting the feeling I left something behind while packing, then I realize, OH! its my boy bird! God I am so pathetic. Its very difficult to really enjoy anything because the whole time I'm wishing you were there to share it with me. :/ I do not understand how I functioned without human contact for so long before you. I'm almost positive I reverted to some sort of android state or something until you came along. I love you with all my heart and soul. I miss your warmth.

3 meow meows Y >^. .^<

Y June 5, 2003 ¤ 1:18 am Y

Life is so wierd sometimes. Watching all my friends graduate.. watching everyone grow up. It freaks me out. I'm not sure I like it. I don't feel grown up. I still feel like a little girl. Jonah leaves for school the 25th. I go back home on the 11th. He doesn't seem too excited to have me around. I find that depressing. Who knows when I see him again. It makes me wonder if he's even going to bother speaking to me when I come up to New York. In the time I've been gone, I already feel like I've been replaced. Out of sight, out of mind i suppose. Its so sad. I don't know though, perhaps going away will make him grow up at least a little. He's probably the best friend I've ever had. Definately the only person in the world that has made me understand what truly platonic love is, considering for a long time I never believed that you could really 'love' your friends. I always figured people just used it for a lack of a better word to describe liking somebody's company alot, or they secretly were madly in love with them. He's one of the very few people in the world I feel completely comfortable with. One of the people that I can really be Niki with. I'm not sure he feels the same way. But I don't think I'm the only one he behaves in this manner with. He has such a wall up. Its painfully obvious. I wish sometimes I could just pull him out of the terrible shell he seems to live in. I don't know why he thinks I don't see this and why he feels that I would like him any less if he just acted like himself. I don't know. This is all depressing me. Speaking of people growing up and dissapearing from my life. I remembered a few days ago that Matt was shipping out at the end of May. By the time I realized this it was too late to say goodbye. I never had a chance to give him my address or phone number or even to let him know I will indeed miss his company despite all the drama we've been through over the time we've known each other. He is another of my very best friends, even though he probably doesn't know he ever meant that much to me. It would figure I'd be too dumb to ever let him know. Doubtful that I'll ever get a chance to talk to him again. That in itself makes me want to cry. Being ripped away from your friends so abruptly, all ties severed. It makes you feel very alone. This growing up business is overrated. I sat at graduation, slightly depressed as I watched how eager everyone was to leave, to get their diplomas and say goodbye to highschool. I wish they knew how good they had it. Its only been a year for me and I already miss how easy it all was. How comfortable those last few years were. I need to shut up now before i get really sad. That is all. Goodnight.

Y >^. .^<

Y May 28, 2003 ¤ 8:48 pm Y

Note: To all stalkers who obsessively read this journal like vultures because I have done something eons ago in some community that upset their delicate egos, please.

GET THE FUCK OVER IT ALREADY.

Sunlight is good guys, you should really step off the computer every once and a while and try it.

Y >^. .^<

Y May 18, 2003 ¤ 12:55 pm Y
Y I can't just ignore this.

Please help this girl and her beautiful kitten. It makes me so sad I want to cry. It disgusts me that we would execute an animal, a pet at that due to something as ridiculous as a lack of money. It makes me ill that money is worth more to people than living, breathing creature's life.

Her cat, Carson, broke his femur in half. The surgery was quoted at costing nearly 800 dollars and her parents had planned to put him to sleep because they couldn't find the money. She and her sister finally convinced her parents to get him the surgery, but they aren't sure how they're going to pay for it. She's set up a paypal account. I donated $40.00 thus far and will probably end up donating more.

Please help her. You can go here for more info: http://www.livejournal.com/community/animal_rights/374100.html


6 meow meows Y >^. .^<

Y April 25, 2003 ¤ 6:18 pm Y

There is nothing like some therpeutic, no holds barred shopping. Mmmm..new clothes make me feel pretty. God damn express for having such awesome clothes. The damage is as follows:
From express:
A snazzy little black off the shoulder shirt with a trampy low-v neckline and a gather down the middle and back. Its cute, not slutty, i swear.
A black chiffon shirt with very odd slit sleeves. they tie together at the shoulder and elbow with little ribbons, its also slit at the sides. I prefer to leave the sleeves untied, it makes me look like a trendy butterfly with style. :D Its very see-through. I'll have to find a black tanktop or something to go under it so I dont look like a three cent hooker.
An off white chiffon shirt with a red beaded/sequined flower on one side. Its one shouldered. The sleeve is like the aformentioned black shirt, flowing and slit, ties together at the elbow and shoulder. There is also a thin tie on the shoulder without the sleeve to hold it up so i don't expose myself. the bodice is super long and A-line. It stops just below my hips. So pretty. ..so see through. :o
I also got two bras. a black one and an offwhite one. Strapless. Lots of padding to enhance what was never there. I think I can get away wearing the offwhite one underneath the off white shirt without looking too trampy. Its too sweet and innocent to look slutty, even if it is sort of see through. I'll just avoid dirty old men..
I also got..two new pairs of earrings and a necklace. (fuck express and their tempting buy 2 get one free deal. I can never resist.)

They also had a grossly cute pair of pink terrycloth capris, but there were ZERO in my size. only grossly large sizes and grossly small sizes. Dammit. Maybe they'll have a pair at the other express when I go visit my mommy. We shall see.

I went to gap too and got a pair of jeans and a halter top and a scarf and a buttondown military shirt but gap is boring so fuck them. And for some reason they have nothing but khakis now and i fucking HATE HATE HATE KHAKIS! i also hate those disgusting peasant shirts and "tunics" they have now with embroidered flowers and shit on them. It looks like maternity wear. nasty.

I was going to get greg some stuff too..but i need him with me. I couldnt decide if the two shirts i liked were something he would like. Fat chance I'll ever get him to the mall.....................

1 meow meows Y >^. .^<

Y April 25, 2003 ¤ 8:03 am Y

This made me cry.

It disgusts me that human beings can be this incredibly cruel to another creature. And most of us just turn the other cheek..

1 meow meows Y >^. .^<

Y April 24, 2003 ¤ 7:03 am Y

god it pisses me off when people request a livejournal style from me, i spend 3 hours doing it, then they change the fucking thing 4 hours later without so much as a thanks. what the fuck. i understand now why so many people are so reluctant to help people with overrides and stuff. too many unappreciative retards...

1 meow meows Y >^. .^<

Y April 23, 2003 ¤ 10:06 am Y






...just spreading the love.

no thats not me. ..go read ljdrama.org. :)

Y >^. .^<

Y April 22, 2003 ¤ 12:56 pm Y

I am beta testing the new livejournal site layout. I like it. Its calm and blue and nice. So much prettier than the old one.

3 meow meows Y >^. .^<

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