What if I need you forever?

Private

Wed, 28 Nov 2007 06:58:48 GMT

Wow. Lj has gotten a lot cooler since I've been gone.
I've decided to keep this journal private.
to use it as a diary of sorts.
to keep my mind straight.

nothing against anyone.

this everlasting innocence...

Tue, 20 Jun 2006 21:30:31 GMT

I can't be anything but who I am

and I'm tired of pretending to be things I'm not

I haven't seen anyone in a really long time

so if you would like to hang out with me

or just catch up

please leave me a comment

Sun, 19 Feb 2006 05:53:05 GMT

life is really confusing
especially when it comes to relationships
why can't everything be black and white and you know what you feel, why does there have to be gray areas?

Wed, 25 Jan 2006 06:57:24 GMT

Like I said, it's from a LONG time ago. haha

SOCKS

Wed, 25 Jan 2006 06:47:53 GMT

Someone please take this adorable

And just for reference, this is my brother's cat:

Don't they look almost EXACTLY alike? p.s. excuse the mess

Socks

Wed, 25 Jan 2006 02:19:13 GMT

So
Today I finally went out to Drew's house and got that cat.
And I was planning on finding it a home and keeping one of the new kittens when it was born.
I was all set too.
But the thing is,
It looks EXACTLY the same as my brother's cat.
EXACTLY
only my brother's cat is the devil, and this cat is sweet. She purrs so loud.
It was hilarious, I brought her home, and I had her in my arms, and my mom didn't say anything, she thought it was my brother's cat. I had to tell her it wasn't sabrina.

So, if anyone wants an adorable kitty, let me know ASAP, because if I keep her for a week or two, I'm never going to be able to give her up.
I'll post pictures later.

P.S.
Her name is Socks, she's grey with a white chest and white feet.

yoga bear

Wed, 18 Jan 2006 06:32:04 GMT

I haven't updated in a long time, but I haven't had much to say.
I'm proud of myself for trying to expand and step outside of my box, lately I've been nicer to people I think.
and once again, I don't have much to say.
Lately I've been feeling almost like I'm suffocating and I can't let my breath out.
and I'm not sure why, because lately I've been almost content with my life, at least non-concerned.
I need to join a gym. And take up yoga. And lose weight.
Bonnie, Thursday, we're running. most probably.
It's all I dreamed about last night. Well, mostly.

I'm afraid and tired of my stalker. Hopefully this dance thing will fix that maybe?
I'm still not sure what to do about that either. BUT, at least I mentioned something to joey about it, aren't you proud of me bonnie? haha, but just as friends. I'm too content for changes right now.

I think I may just go and steal Drew's cat from him until it has kittens and put them on the waiting list at the ark so they can find good homes. I talked to my mom about it and she almost definately agreed with me. Well, about taking the kittens. I seriously think I may just take them all. I kind of want to keep one, but she would kill me. But she's always easy to persuade, hahaha, that's why we have so many pets now. Does petsmart give employee discounts? Because I need it. haha.

Sun, 25 Dec 2005 03:23:22 GMT

Sat, 24 Dec 2005 05:23:35 GMT

Happy Holidays everyone!
I hope you guys have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

toothpicks?

Fri, 16 Dec 2005 05:45:52 GMT

Today was awesome.
++Slept in late because of exams
+++Jen Wiley rode with me to Parkway
+++++Ate lunch with my mommy
++++++++++++++++++Got DINOSAUR pajama bottoms
+++Had a really nice caramel machiatto
++++Went to Kristal's play
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++Got my Christmas present from Cortney!
++cleaned out my car
oh and
-----------I dropped a toothpick in my steering wheel, yes IN my steering wheel and found a bunch of melted candy in my back floorboard

I have been trying to think of something for my grandmother to get me for christmas, and today I finally decided on a nicer tv, with a vcr and dvd player built in instead of just a dvd player. And then my mom told me that she had already gotten me something and it was nothing I would ever think of. So, I'm kind of worried. Is it a bike? Or a monkey?
I have no clue.

Thu, 15 Dec 2005 23:25:16 GMT

Dear Santa...

Dear Santa,

This year I've been busy!

In May I had a shoot-out with rival gang lords in the ghetto near our school (-760 points). In January I set flippercandoall's puppy on fire (-6600 points). In September I made porn for emo_xninja (1000000 points). Last Wednesday I saved a busload of nuns in Angola (3260 points). Last week I told ragxdoll_'s parents she had a myspace (-5 points).

Overall, I've been awesome (1003050 points). For Christmas I deserve Kate Winslet's Boobs!

Sincerely,
_midnight_tears

Not to be a dirty perv, I think this woman is gorgeous.

Wed, 14 Dec 2005 06:23:52 GMT

Tuesday byotches

Mon, 05 Dec 2005 07:19:04 GMT

Oh my God.
I love Kate Winslet.
My birthday is Tuesday byotches.
So someone get me a poster of Kate Winslet.
And I will love you forever.
But it has to be a pretty picture of her.
Wait, who am I kidding? They're all pretty.

Hello everybody

Wed, 30 Nov 2005 03:23:56 GMT

hahaha, this is too true

What Is Your Animal Personality?
brought to you by Quizilla

Tue, 22 Nov 2005 05:38:50 GMT

Movies I want to see:
Derailed
North Country
Pride and Prejudice
Chronicles of Narnia
Fun with Dick and Jane
Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang
Just Friends
Crash
The Constant Gardener
Closer
A Mighty Wind
Mr. and Mrs. Smith
The Island

Movies I want:
Eternal Sunshine
Garden State
Conspiracy Theory
Amelie
The Notebook
Cold Mountain
Mean Girls
Finding Neverland

Sun, 20 Nov 2005 03:36:39 GMT

I'm pretty sure I have pink eye.
My eye is half swollen and won't stop watering. I can hardly see out of it.
:(

Sat, 19 Nov 2005 05:18:46 GMT

Tonight was awesome.
I've been pretty relieved about the whole swim team thing. I'm going to fake sick monday and get out of our last swim meet, but i'll probably end up really being sick because my whole family except for me is sick.

I got to hang out with Bonnie and Derek and Maria and Daniel and a cool guy tonight.
Maria is awesome. And I was happy to see Derek again. He's awesome too.

I wish it wasn't so cold outside.

let me see that thong

Tue, 15 Nov 2005 05:39:59 GMT

I'm really proud of myself.
I came in second in my 50 free and cut two seconds off my time.
AND AND AND
guess who I raced against?
CLAIRE
who knew she was in swimming and did not tell me?
and guess who ELSE is in swimming?
LUKE
so to all you people that are not swimming and are losers, you suck.
but I still love you anyway.

I came in last in 100 back, but that was to be expected.

Mon, 14 Nov 2005 05:01:16 GMT

One day, you'll ask me to speak of a truth - of the miracle of your birth. To explain what is unexplained. And if I falter or fail on this day, know there is an answer, my child, a sacred imperishable truth, but one you may never hope to find alone. Chance meeting your perfect other, your perfect opposite - your protector and endangeror. Chance embarking with this other on the greatest of journeys - - a search for truths fugitive and imponderable. If one day this chance may befall you, my son, do not fail or falter to seize it. The truths are out there. And if one day you should behold a miracle, as I have in you, you will learn the truth is not found in science, or on some unseen plane, but by looking into your own heart. And in that moment you will be blessed - and stricken. For the truest truths are what hold us together, or keep us painfully, desperately apart.

for God's sakes preach with conviction

Mon, 14 Nov 2005 03:56:42 GMT

Tonight was fun
I went bowling with my dad and brothers
then met up with bonnie, patrick, caitlin, and nick and we hung out at cheeburger
that was pretty fun.
Patrick burned my hand up though and it was bleeding, but it was pretty funny

I hate to say it, but things are so much more relaxing with my mom gone
I mean I love my mom, but she's always hanging around being depressed and it really brings me down.

Tomorrow swim meet at natatorium or something like that.
screw this, it's almost over.

Mon, 07 Nov 2005 07:34:05 GMT

Saturday was the hardest day I have ever been through.
Having a mental breakdown is not cool.
And to make a long story short, I now I have to find a job.
So if anyone knows of anybody that is hiring, I need a job as soon as possible so let me know.

Wed, 02 Nov 2005 07:07:38 GMT

Playing dress-up doesn't change you on the inside

gummy brains

Mon, 31 Oct 2005 06:49:40 GMT

Death Cab for Cutie was amazing. It was definately the best night this year.
Stars was really good too.
I have been sick all weekend though.

Last night I saw Saw II with my brother and some of his friends. It was really good and I liked how it was completely nothing that I expected it to be.

Tonight I went to a bonfire at Bonnie's church.
Tomorrow should be fun, I'm going with Drew to Kristal's church to get some cool points and then I'm going trick-or-treating. I'm going to be Artemis! With a bow and stuff like that.

Tonight I was thinking about things that I have been dealing with. I really have begun to hate some people and I was thinking that it's really stupid and pointless, but I can't help but hate them.
My stupid mouth always screws things up.

You may feel alone when you're falling asleep
And everytime tears roll down your cheeks
But I know your heart belongs to someone you've yet to meet
Someday you will be loved

You'll be loved you'll be loved
Like you never have known
The memories of me
Will seem more like bad dreams
Just a series of blurs
Like I never occurred
Someday you will be loved

gang bangin the smurfette

Fri, 28 Oct 2005 03:07:21 GMT

Tonight was really fun, I went with drew to deadline.
OH! the hot guy from the hayride was Jesus! lol
then drew and I hung out and talked about school and stuff. It was really a good time.
OHHH!!! AND AND AND
I got to talk to Joey online because I actually got on! WHEEHOO
today was great.

P.S.
Today my little brother told me that he loves hellogoodbye. <3<3<3

Wed, 19 Oct 2005 05:29:23 GMT

This is the moment that you know
That you told her that you loved her but you don't.
You touch her skin and then you think
That she is beautiful but she don't mean a thing to me.
Yeah, she is beautiful but she don't mean a thing to me.

Wanted to believe in all the words that i was speaking
As we moved together in the dark
And all the friends that i was telling
And all the playful misspellings
And every bite i gave you left a mark