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LJ Idol Week 23 - The Weak Force

April 17th, 2012 (10:52 am)



It was Carter’s first case as lead officer and he and his team had the house surrounded. Nine officers, all with weapons drawn were creeping along behind him, making him so nervous he could barely speak.

As they smashed down the front door, a figure ran across the room in front of them. Just the man they were looking for!

“Get face-down on the floor and put your head in the air!” Carter barked, trying to sound authoritative. It must have worked; the figure stopped moving and turned to him, a look of confusion on his face. A fit of giggles came from behind him and he whipped his head around to find where the nosie came from. He was met with nothing but a wall of blank stares.

“Did anyone have anything to say?” He asked, slowly looking at each of his team in the eyes. In turn each man solemnly shook his head, until it came to the second last in line. Rogers, a rookie officer with a stutter, avoided eye contact and nervously pointed at the bad guy on the floor.

“h-h–h–hhhands,” He managed to say seconds before someone slapped the words out of him.

“Hands?” Carter repeated, confused.

Rogers nodded eagerly. “Hands, sir. You s-s-s-said ‘head in the air’ but I think you m-m-m-me-meant ‘hands in the air’”

Carter turned bright red, not liking being shown to be a fool by a fool. “Rogers, take this scum outside and lock him in the car. Tie his hands behind his back before you go.”

Rogers complied, his cap falling down over his eyes as he bent down to pick up the bad guy from the floor. More snorts came from the back row and Carter assigned each officer a task to keep them busy.

Girly shrieks pierced through the quiet morning air and Carter went running through the house to the front yard, where he thought the noise came from. He found Rogers sitting on the grass beside the car, his hands tied behind his back, and the bad guy nowhere in the vicinity. Blood was pouring out of a wound on his neck and he looked more than a little bewildered.

“What the fuck, Rogers!” Carter exploded, unable to hold back his frustration at the absurdity of the situation. “Where is our bad guy?”

Rogers looked around the yard, “H-h-h-he’s not here boss.”

“NO SHIT SHERLOCK!”

Looking back at the house Carter saw eight pairs of wide eyes staring through the front window at them, not sure whether to laugh or run. Carter hoped the look on his face told them to run, very, very fast.

After he radioed for help, Carter untied Rogers, against his better judgement. Pressing a cloth against his wound he told him to stay where he was and called for backup. Someone needed to come and catch their bad guy, even though he was probably long gone.

“Boss?” Carter asked when he called in, “can you please send in the strong force this time? The weak force just didn’t cut it today.”

Comments

Posted by: whipchick (whipchick)
Posted at: April 17th, 2012 02:29 am (UTC)

Great punchline! I love the image of Carter whipping around to see who giggled, too.

Small typos I spotted - "the bad guy no where in the vicinity" might be "nowhere"? And does Rogers get to finish "meant" or does he get cut off at "me"?

I really enjoyed this and it was a lot of fun - great energy!

Posted by: tragic.princess (_messy)
Posted at: April 17th, 2012 02:56 am (UTC)
Rainbow Brain

Argh, thanks. It's been one of those mornings where my usual editor was unavailable so I had to submit it un-beta'd!

I'm actually surprised there aren't more errors lol

Posted by: jacq22 (jacq22)
Posted at: April 17th, 2012 10:50 am (UTC)

Fun stuff, and punchline,....had some verve.

Posted by: Jemima Pauler (jem0000000)
Posted at: April 17th, 2012 05:27 pm (UTC)

Aw, poor dude. Sounds like a rough day at work.

Posted by: MamaCheshire (cheshire23)
Posted at: April 17th, 2012 08:36 pm (UTC)

Sounds like the backup needs to come replace Carter. :)

Posted by: m_malcontent (m_malcontent)
Posted at: April 17th, 2012 10:29 pm (UTC)

Cute, funny take on the prompt.

Posted by: Ellakite (ellakite)
Posted at: April 18th, 2012 02:59 am (UTC)

I dunno... given a choice between the Strong Force and the Weak Force, I personally prefer dealing with the Weak Force every time.

Then again, I've got the death sentence in twelve systems...

A cute take on the topic. Thanks for sharing it.

Posted by: ecosopher (ecosopher)
Posted at: April 18th, 2012 07:36 am (UTC)

Heh heh, this was amusing. Liked it a lot.

Posted by: Myrna (myrna_bird)
Posted at: April 18th, 2012 09:50 pm (UTC)

Ha Ha Ha! Real cute!

Posted by: The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors (halfshellvenus)
Posted at: April 19th, 2012 05:23 pm (UTC)

Nothing like being undermined by unprofessional behavior on the part of your backup squad!

That just gives bad guys the encouragement to try what this one did. ;)

Posted by: Karmic Myadorian (karmasoup)
Posted at: April 19th, 2012 07:57 pm (UTC)
No Really!

I actually knew what the giggle was all about as soon as it happened... I'd actually giggled out loud to myself when I read the line "put your head in the air." Cute.

Posted by: similiesslip (similiesslip)
Posted at: April 19th, 2012 09:35 pm (UTC)

Poor guy! It's rough to be a leader!

Your entry was a very creative take on the prompt. I never would have thought of using it this way, but it worked very well!:)

Posted by: mstrobel (mstrobel)
Posted at: April 20th, 2012 12:02 am (UTC)

LOL! Made me giggle, loved it :D

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