LJ Idol Week 19 - et tu, Brute?

Meet Brutus.

“Et tu, Brutus?”

The crocodile opened his eyes and grunted in annoyance. He couldn't tell if the one-legged pelican was trying to be funny by misquoting Shakespeare or was just plain ignorant. Either way, he had no desire to converse with the bird this morning.

Brutus slithered off the bank of the river and into the murky water to hide himself from the pesky long billed creature. Nigel didn’t get the hint.

“So how’d it happen?”

Brutus flicked his tail to dislodge the persistent pelican perched on his back – not a hard thing to do when the pelican is balanced precariously on one leg.

Nigel climbed from the water back onto the crocodile and shook out his feathers. “Way to kick a man when he’s down!”

“Shuttup pelican,” Brutus warned with a growl. It had been a long night with very little food, and with each word the pelican uttered he was looking more and more appealing to the crocodile, even as scrawny as he was.

"So man, the leg?" The pelican continued, unaware of Brutus' thoughts, "I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours?"

Nigel took the crocodiles lack of protest as a deal and immediately launched into his tale of woe.

"There I was, you know, just sitting in the sun minding my own business."

Brutus interrupted with a snort, "are you capable of minding your own business?"

Nigel the pelican started to sulk. "Fine, I give up. You tell me yours then."

The crocodile dipped his head below the water and blew air out of his nose, making a trail of bubbles on the surface. He felt the pelican jumping on his head and came back above the water. "Come on!" Nigel said impatiently. "I don't have all day."

"You really wanna know how I lost my leg," Brutus asked? The pelican nodded, ready for the story.

"Well, one day there was this pelican." The crocodile paused for effect. "The damm pelican wouldn't stop talking to me, and the only way to get away from him was to chew my own freakin leg off!!!"

Nigel flew up in air and opened his beak in shock, but before he could make a noise Brutus roared and lunged out of the water at him. There was a flurry of water and feathers as cameras clicked and flashes flashed. The pair performed their familiar act for the boatload of tourists as they "ooh'd" and "aaah'd" appropriately.

“Just throw me your children,” Brutus grumbled, “your applause doesn't fill my stomach.”