beautiful loser warm hearts have let you down

plethora of secrets&things i cant tell you

Mon, 30 May 2005 09:31:17 GMT

why are my friends the best people i know? for serious, we are the best people going 'round. we are a million times better than you.
today was so good [except for the failing cafs, that - not so good] but was really really lovely and enjoyable and all around nice and fun.

why are my friends the funniest people ever? and why am i so clever and witty? when did i become this funny? because my complete lack-of-humour has been a problem for a good many years of my life.
oh dear. i love my friends.

this afternoon i had to catch the bus home & it was horrible because my discman is broke and i had zero music. which meant i had nothing to distract me from thinking about this person i may or may not like which is bad. i shouldnt be thinking about you like this. you are my friend and i love you completely. which is why i should not like you or want to mack you ~~or think about how much i really want to mack you~~
eurgh. why is this so complicated? no really, why is this sooo incredibly bad. you dont like me. not like that. you love me [this i know completely] but i am your friend. you tell me things, i tell you things. we dont mack.
but why do i want to? why now?

[i know the answer to this question, but im not willing to think there is a chance your revelation leaves open a window for me & you]

& this sucks because it has to remain one of my plethora of secrets [just not one i can whip out at random intervals when conversation dies]
because i love you too much.

p.s. helen, do not leave me! do not go away on holidays! you can come holiday here with me in wangi for a month, yeah, how about that? wangi = a million times better than europe.... [yeah, in what lifetime guys?]
p.p.s. neda is not bulgarian for sami, therefore neda does not get to know my secret. sami is also not alexis' middle name, so she therefore also does not get to know. i happen to know what your middle name is, so do not try to fool me. i am so clever[&witty]

lovelovelovelovelovelovelove

a many number of song lyrics that mean so much to me right now&always...

1. Save me from drowning in the sea
2. and so i'll run, but not too far, incase you chase me...
3. everybody's got to live their life, and God knows I've got to live mine
4. i'm stuck on a rooftop trying hard not to let you down
5. pull me out from inside
6. the moon is shining now, and shadows are what's left of all the noise. Simple silhouettes and cut outs, as if we had the choice
7. i dont feel like im falling
8. im a wishful thinker with the worst intentions
9. your innocence i'll consume
10. i danced to all your fucking soul
11. sway through the crowd to an empty space
12. your see-through fads and your crazy fazes
13. this place is a prison, these people aren't your friends
14. 'cause what if all we see, is all we've got?
15. i'm not the one who broke you, i'm not the one you should fear
16. i know how i feel when im around you, i dont know, how i feel when i'm around you
17. this intoxication thrills me, i only pray it doesnt kill me
18. tonight im gonna give you all my love in the backseat
19. what, you too cute to dance?
20. you say we're fatally flawed, well im easily bored, is that okay?

what the gay guys, what the gay? [total amount of sense in this post: zero]

Sat, 28 May 2005 06:39:25 GMT

longest nine hours of my life... i was about to pass out from dehydration... there is not enough water in the universe to accomodate me now... or sugary things to boost my energy... or caffeine to caffeinate me... whatever, okay. i dont even know.

on a totally separate note...

i fucking love you, you know

~~may even be crushing slightly.~~ but who even knows, really? not me, that's for sure.

i would totally mack you though

i mean, uh, what?

p.s. me + neda + alexis = best people ever. we are eighty million thousand times better than you, and dont you forget it.

yeah luke, back in the real world

Fri, 27 May 2005 07:36:13 GMT

aww lecky, you're so gorgeous. [neda is so silly]
what love, incredible love i have for the both of you.

Wed, 25 May 2005 08:35:49 GMT

so, there was a freak out about extension english this morning... it did not help when lec ate my biscuit. yeah, thats right, i wanted that biscuit.
but you know, did okay actually, wrote five pages so that was good. i left so much out though. then i had to study for cafs. ergh. lec and ashleigh, you guys suck. i was trying to study, obviously. absolutely failed that one. there go fifty marks, watch em go, you just watch em. longest hour and a half of my life because i had no idea what i was talking about
but then we went to the park. and got food. and mango in a cup. and sat, and played and layed and laughed at neda in all her bulgarian-ness and sang and laughed and it was nice. because it was an autumn day and we were all laughing and smiling and happy.
and i listened to music the whole way home and walked home in the sun while the sky was blue and pink and purple and yellow and it was really pretty so i layed on the rocks with my feet in the water and watched the sun set before i came home.

and i still havent started studying for society and culture tomorrow. i am soo tired. i could sleep for a week. one whole week. maybe even two.
spreading myself too thin, i am, i am.

but that doesnt really matter because today was just a lot of fun and laughter and niceness with kids that i love very much

its my lover's birthday today. hi neda!!

Tue, 24 May 2005 09:39:10 GMT

so my day consisted of many things. like freak out over religion. who knew that exam meant so much to me? no really? and then catching a train while thinking about extension. eating food while thinking about extension. then tiring of thinking about extension so procrastinated instead. bought books and got some music. then decided i needed a new bra because i enjoy bra shopping and ive totally gone up a bra size! yes! go team, go. then came home on a particularly interesting bus ride which included such quotes [both funny and meaningful] "you're completely in your own world when you listen to your music" "your eyes are a shade of marvelous blue" and my personal favourite "aren't you having a baby?" WTF?!? KIERAN! what the hell do you tell your friends?! seriously. i almost died laughing. then came home and the neda called me.... at four fifteen there abouts... just got off the phone to her about ten minutes ago... spent the whole time going over FRANKENSTEIN! yes! we will beat you allllll in the extension exam! we are the best people i know. for serious. we are so funny and lame and awesome.

i am now going to go do some more extension study before the oc. neda and i are having a studying party in the morning before school [like, early] if anyone wants to join us in our lame factor of about ten.

yes, go team.

p.s. listening to nobody someday makes me the single happiest person alive. i adore this song times infinity million eighty thousand. yeah, 'cause that's a number.

bitter&useless when you're drunk [i always get what i want and sometimes that isnt enough]

Sat, 21 May 2005 07:45:35 GMT

all i want is to be the very best for you
[oh this time there'll be no life of crime]
don't rain on me tonight
circle around me now baby it'll be ok
cause we all go downtown sometimes
somehow baby we'll beat this mess
it's the time fuck the surface to meet the specialist
[time away from me will get you down...]
and you're spelling out your love
you shouldn't be alone in there
you could be above ground

i enjoy this song right now. i enjoy these words because i think they are more me than i've been lately. i wanted to call you, but i realised i probably couldnt and everyone else was doing things like sleeping [alex] or out [piccolo] and who else did i call? there were people, but i cant remember. i just like talking. so now im writing letters because im not going to be too scared to give them to you. not anymore.

i'm tried of being afraid.

i understand why you didnt come to the phone [but i wasnt calling to talk]

Sat, 21 May 2005 05:20:16 GMT

dean asked me out today. not in the sense of 'we are dating', but just going out and macking whenever. its funny because thats something i really wanted before all this mess happened, before everything changed so drastically.

after i finished work he met me outside with a bottle of jim beam in hand. he is such a lovely boy. he calls me darling and apparantly i can only be his sami [this is only true in wangi - everyone else calls me sam here]

and we kissed under these nice shady trees and he never pushes me, because im me. he's known me since i was eight, he would never hurt me.

too bad i dont really like him as much as i used to. im torn between him and someone else, but even both of these people are only in the very back of my mind [not very important] because there is an odd calm facade infront of all the chaos.

i think at the moment i am just too tired to deal with certain people right now, and you were right in everything you said [it didnt hurt me or make me hate you, i like that we can be open about all of these things and have it not hurt] we do need space.

but really, [eww] midcourse.

Fri, 22 Apr 2005 06:51:50 GMT

on tuesday claire and i met skovsky for our [long awaited] history day [entirely my fault because im "grounded"]
we spent most of this time walking around looking for places to eat

yesterday? so much fun. met bianca for coffee. it was raining. bought some things. then went on an adventure to jb.
jb is my god. for serious, i say this every time i go there, but i mean it. i would marry jb. we got so caught up in all the things and then i had to buy phone credit... missed all the buses... we were stranded. in kotara. so what did we do?
laughed our heads off. prank called a few people. sang kelly clarkson in the pouring rain. and laughed some more. then sang a bit of jesse mccartney [quite frankly its all about beautiful soul]
then the 317 came and saved us and our lunch with skovsky on darby [skovsky is my lover, incase you were wondering]
then me, claire, schmoan went to bianca's house. where random things occured.

missy higgins and i are best friends. no joke.

last night? so good. [understatement of the century] first of all, front row, right in front of her, i was like, oh my god, i love tickets and seats and all those things that contribute to being in the front row.
the support acts provided hours of entertainment for all with not-so-random messaging with people IN THE SAME BUILDING, AT THE SAME CONCERT [or in lec's case, on the way to] claire and schmoan conveniently leaving and me making bianca laugh. i love making bianca laugh.
since you been gone
i can breathe for the first time
im so moving on, yeah
thanks to you, now i get
i get what i want
since you been gone kelly clarkson is also my best friend.

seeing lovely friends like alex and christine and lec and kelsey [i love friends]
crying and laughing and singing and screaming into the darkness [filled with all the bright lights]

the fact that she played cactus with that awesome instrumental. i was about to die of love.
nightminds
any day now
they weren't there
greed for your love
this is how it goes

these are favourites. i wish she had played katie. i love that song. and dancing dirt into the snow. i love that too.
how good was it when she went completely off in casualty? i was just like man, you are my best friend. no joke.

and bianca and i went to her home afterwards. we watched the glass house which we had taped.
ARJ BARKER IS MY BOYFRIEND
seriously. i will have sex with him one day. and im not even joking. he is so sttractive. and so funny. i die with love everytime i see him.
we watched a walk to remember afterwards and i spent the entire time crying from when she tells him that she's sick. i just cry continually from then.
then we slept. then i got up. and went home so i could go to work. work makes me cry. kyle coming into work today and talking to me for ages did not even make being there worthwhile. but at least amanda and i are getting on better.

i own chasing liberty on dvd. this makes me about a million times better than all of you [unless of course you own it too, then i'd say, i had front row seats to missy higgins last night, how about you?]
im so mean. its quite funny. i really spend too much time with bianca and claire.

Mon, 18 Apr 2005 04:27:49 GMT

lately i just can't seem to believe
discard my friends to change the scenery
it meant the world to hold a bruising faith
but now its just a matter of grace

ben and matt make me laugh at work.

Sat, 16 Apr 2005 05:58:01 GMT

i started work at 6am
vaughn came into my work about 10 o'clock
where i conveniently found something to do out the back
he hung around outside for too long
i was praying so hard he would just leave
until he had gone
then i spent the next hour
hoping he would not come back
and he didnt
which is good

kyle came in this afternoon
this made me smile
we talked about his driving
[he drove me to work yesterday]
and just random things
[and yes, i do love him]
but i feel... guilty?
[because i like someone else]

and funnily enough, this person is not vaughn
whom i dont like
[this is why i should never kiss wangi boys]
unless their name is kyle
[and they have broken up with their girlfriend whom is my friend]
maybe

Wed, 13 Apr 2005 06:42:22 GMT

chase is officially stalking me. and hugging me. and touching me unnecessarily. NO I WILL NOT SLEEP WITH YOU. okay, good. im glad we understand each other.

in other news, what is with the whole punk/emo/alternative genre and twenty dollar bills? brand new, taking back sunday, the postal service? i mean, really?

bianca, explain this to me. [ps. i am loving the postal service about a million right now]

and i want life in every word, to the extent that its absurd
[i want so badly to believe that there is truth that love is real]

my absolute favourite.

Wed, 09 Mar 2005 06:59:04 GMT

so i got home at ten to five, left home at five to go for a walk. i like walking in the afternoons. met up with joey and lijah, talked to them for a while.

note to

Helen Henry

- Dean's 18th is on the 9th April (its a Saturday, and we're both invited. it'll be fucking awesome. you are so coming with me. we're gonna have THAT much fun. so many hot guys. im so pumped.

but then i was walking alone for a bit, and all of a sudden this guy is standing next to me and goes, 'how old are you?' and im like, 16, and he's like, 'do you wanna go out with me? im 17' and i was like, no, go away. but he wouldnt go away. he started walking beside me and wouldnt leave and just kept talking. and im like seriously, no, no i wont go out with you. but he kept following me, so i caught up to joey and he rescued me. then i walked past his work like the loser i am. im so lame. but its funny. and incredibly sad. especially if they're gonna be there, together, on sunday. i may cry. or flirt. or be punched in the face. but most likely cry. [unless they've broken up. no, that's bad, she's my friend, i have to stop thinking that] but its always in the back of my mind.

i love parties. that much. im so lame. [because all i think about is boys. and parties.]

you're untouchable for me
unreachable on a good day
sometimes we'll do that little dance
you let me feel what i want to
then you go back to her
please can we stop the dancing?
[it fucking hurts]

the lady of shallot

Tue, 01 Feb 2005 08:47:29 GMT

The web was woven curiously,
The charm is broken utterly,
Draw near and fear not - this is I,

maybe, maybe.

maybe one day.

fuck.

Mon, 31 Jan 2005 05:57:40 GMT

Bang.

my friends are hot, and i am an idiot.

just waiting for the hat to drop

p.s. i missed everyone like crazy. i miss you. i wish i could talk to you, but im scared at the end of all this we'll look at each other and realise we have nothing to say.

Fri, 21 Jan 2005 06:22:16 GMT

so i went to pick up my pay this afternoon, and jacqui was working, my jacqui, my girl, my work-god. she is the most awesome girl. and i was like, oh my god i get to see you today, this is so cool. but noooo, i wont get to see jacqui tomorrow, because my stupid manager changed this saturday completely because she's cut at the both of us. so instead of me jacqui and tash working the whole day, im there with stupid manager and kate who goes to school with jacqui and is a bitchface (according to miss jacqui) so now i have to work six and a half hours alooooooonnnnnee. and i was going to be so sad, but jacqui's going to come and visit me.

i am going to queensland next friday. hoorah for land of queens.

i am taking over alex's house on monday, with the help of piccolo, and we will repeatedly hit alex over the head with large heavy objects all night...

but lets all take comfort in the best news ive had all holidays.... stephen fry will be the voice of the guide in the hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy film. now i get alan rickman's voice and darling's (ha, blackadder)

its so funny that this is the coolest thing in the world for me.

... i wish i could go to waveaid with jacqui, but nooooo, im going to queensland. i really really really want to see nic cester sing evie. right now. in my pants.

with love, from (me) and christine

Fri, 21 Jan 2005 05:13:54 GMT

Boo to you Alex, Boo to you

Wed, 19 Jan 2005 22:31:22 GMT

If there's nothing out there, what was that noise?

Sat, 08 Jan 2005 10:08:48 GMT

Nic Cester, have my children. that is all i have to say about that. (why is he so attractive?)

well this is long. i couldnt sleep last night so i wrote this.

Thu, 30 Dec 2004 02:35:25 GMT

This year started with me and sam and everyone seeing the third lord of the rings on new years day. Last summer included such adventures as me and alex and our secret plan to take over the world – entertainment for the entertainment – owls ahoy – last summer had me having a lot of crazy fun on a houseboat getting sunburnt, drinking, laughing and being in complete love with two boys I could never have. We come back to school. First day back I remember walking along the path to the table and I heard alex scream ‘SAMANTHA’ and alex ran from the table and hugged me, then luke ran over picked me up and spun me around and kissed my head like he always does. That was the best start to school. This year marked the beginning of my best year in art (with mrs greenland) grpahics (with lec) and drama (with all those crazy drama cats)

February was my mother’s first wedding anniversary. February was also Onstage. And all that rain. And me and alex getting separated and me whinging about it and the rain for the rest of the trip, in between taking breaks to get her to write me crazy songs.

This year was the second year of Bec and I being the only one’s in our class, but we had christine, and we had some great times. We also had some bad times. And times when I’d leave science crying and it’d be those two girls who came and found me and made it okay.

Pride and Prejudice was on tv. Bec and I were graced with the delights of Adam Brody once again (I still maintain he will always be our Davey) this was a year of walking and coffee and crazy witch houses and london and writing and shopping and friends and music and changes.

Lauren Green had a party. I liked a different boy then, one from school. I only told one person at that time, and they were about to pass out. Lauren’s party also marks the occasion of luke kicking me in the head and me not remembering.

June was alex’s birthday. Presents and homemade cards with purple, red and black spots. Sweet November was on tv. Chaz Cherry. Oh Jason. We will lock you in a cage and poke you with sticks (I gave alex a stick for christmas) MILDEW!! RED WIG! POND! I love Mildew like she was a real person. June was also the time of mine and alex’s Harry Potter 3 countdown. Numerous emails entitled ‘1 sleeeeeeeeeeep, 10th Juuuuuuune’ and then neither of us going to see it on opening day like we’d planned (damn you christine! I still have your msg – ‘I’m in the cinema, the ads are starting OMG!! – way to rub it in)

July came. Three years. On the first night of the holidays. Three years. That’s how long they’ve been gone. It feels much longer. July was a month of my beautiful boys, a month of being laughed at by Liam and being in love with Brody. It was ferrero rocher’s and rainforests. It was a month of ‘let’s see spiderman do this’ and ‘please do not chase me sir, I am full of chocolate’ and ‘flippendo’ and dylan prank calling me all night and all the next three days and nights and fires and holes in my jeans and my green shirt from the ashes and sleeping on the trampoline with all the boys in the middle of winter and stealing the parents alcohol and sneaking over to the church across the street and drinking the bourbon there and me drinking more at 9 o’clock the next morning and Brody calling me an alco and me wishing I had gone through with waking him up by playing the drums ‘cause he slept with his head beside the bass.

July was also John Butler Trio and Missy Higgins with my beautiful gal pals Helen and Bec. And the attractive waiter at Anacapri on Darby we were trying not to obviously check out infront of their family.

It was a year of Kieran sleeping over more times than I could count and him laying on my floor, drawing pictures. Drawing one in particular for Dylan, which to this day still hangs on Dylan’s wall, beside his bed. I was so proud of him for that. This was Dylan’s first year of high school.

This was a year of many birthdays, the funniest of which hands down must go to christine. The amusement provided by a fire drill. We were absolutely psycho. We still are. I love it. must get the acid to the sink

This was a year of RATIONS of alan rickman, richard curtis, blackadder, hitchhiker’s, harry potter, jason, peter pan and many other british people like french and saunders and stephen fry.

We had my birthday which resulted in a homemade singing card from alex, as per my request and the beginning of the alan rickman rationalise…. Accesorise pose, courtesy of Google Image Search. Shani made me a cake. And gave me a chocolate mocha candle from dusk which I love very much.

This year was a year of madness after sport which resulted in the song: she will get into your pants, your pants, your spandex pants (obviously about christine)

The end of August resulted in my total breakdown and I was saved by one of my most loved friends, who reminded me I could always find happy thoughts even in the darkest of times.this friends helped me to write things down, write about what had happened and how I was feeling and so began my adventures with the little purple book of fricking horrors. At first I hated it. It took so much out of me, away from me, it was there filled with everything. But then I grew to like it. I liked having something I could vent to if I couldn’t on here and I liked having something to store my memories.

September brought the most open conflict between my step-dad and me and huge fights breaking out in between the ignorance. More downward spiralling. but on a positive note, i cut and dyed my hair. marked a 'change in attitude' as alex said. yes, i became witty. hah. as if.

October began and so did Shani and Jo’s Kavon Bash. How much fun was that night?! Alex and I sang Billy Mack style, christine and I danced and sang obnoxiously and I permanently attached myself to lec’s waist. After the Kavon was brilliant too. Went to Bec’s house drinking. Made a sign with a large pencil which reads Hello, I’m Sami’s boobs in reference to my glowing white bra at the Kavon, which, after a few drinks, ended up around my waist somehow. Jo and Shani went bald and somehow Bec’s mum walked over our alcohol and didn’t realise. I still don’t get how she DIDN’T SEE IT!

October was my dear Bentley’s birthday for which I bought her the single coolest drum ever (and the promise of a pirate ship for her 17th) this day also resukted in the two scras on my leg from when I ran into a log while attached to lec.
November was school certificate and me and luke still winning everything in english. This winning also resulted in the triple 0 joke (only witty) and sole and christine singing Frodo, don’t wear the ring... I know its very tempting… and me lec alex and chirstine laughing all lunch and, me falling over laughing and being told to get to class and that was such a brilliantly amusing day… even though I still have no idea what you were laughing at about the test tube. That afternoon in science also resulted in eewww… the bus is giving the carrot head and the reason why I gave christine a carrot for christmas on a bus and we cried laughing.

November was a month of truancy (hi bink, hi sarah) and lots of visits to charlestown with alex and christine. November was Bridget Jones’ 2 and the *collective gasp* November was alex and I trying to do christmas presents, but all we got was the single funniest lj post and a msn conversation with lec where we drover her insane with big fat italian penis and put the meat clever down samantha and lec patient;ly going its cleaver, guys and us sitting there laughing at her because she was “wrong” and we were “right” and then us realising about twenty minutes later she was right and us actually falling over laughing. To this day, that is the most fun I have ever had. And I still have to send those letters.

December was the formal in all its glory and change. Transition program and peer support training and me wanting to live inside Angus & Robertson in town. December was the presentation assembly and me and Ali (team T) paying Sam to hug Mrs Smart. December was me saying goodbye to everyone of my friends who I love and me crying because im a perfectionist. December was LEMONY SNICKET (thankyou christine and greater union cinemas) and all these kids we were praying werent coming to our show. December was cool presents and cards with letters that made me cry. December was long phone conversations and crazy sms’ and letter and smoke signals and fruit baskets (okay maybe not the latter two) December was christmas and presents and my uber-cool completely amazing stereo and sales shopping and the prospect of me birthday shopping tonight for the amazing girl with whom I share my name. Tomorrow will be me working from 11-6.30 then me rushing to Sam’s house for her birthday and new year’s eve.

2005 holds the promise of another houseboat holiday, my friends still being the most amazing, inspiring crazy beautiful people they are, mine and bec’s long awaited Pride and Prej day, mine alex and christine’s week of hibernation where our only contact with the outside world will be random calls to lec that involve ‘put the meat clever down samantha’ or something to that affect. Unless you want to hibernate with us? It’ll be fun. LotR, harry potter, pride and prej, peter pan, blackadder, abfab…

Its been a good year, but ive left a lot out, like somewhere in there, I was lec’s PR agent. Tempest and Bentley were created. Ty had his hands down bec’s shirt. Graphics was fun. I got lec back (the gluing incident you did not expect at all) some men were overboard. Lec did a revenge monologue. All that crazy goodness that keeps us sane.

I love you all, I miss you like crazy, and thankyou, becasuse you’ve all seen the best and worst of me, and I wouldn’t have it any other way, because you’re all amazing.

Have a good new year. Love.

oh my fucking god, its coming out.

Tue, 21 Dec 2004 19:08:13 GMT

July 16th, 2005. Harry Potter six, the Half Blood Prince. get there. right now. so the best christmas present i could have ever gotten. but its so long to wait. this will kill me. thats so long away.

i didn't steal it, just permanently borrowed.

Sat, 18 Dec 2004 11:05:41 GMT

maybe this could be interesting...

1. Reply to this post, because I would like to say a couple words about you.
2. I will also tell you what song(s) remind me of you when I hear it.
3. I will also give ONE WORD that I associate with you when I think of you.
4. steal this for your journal if you want to do the same. Or not. I will cry if you do not. pirates ye be warned.

yeah, sorry. had to add that.

i love oprah. and pulleys.

Wed, 15 Dec 2004 04:20:03 GMT

so i bought christmas presents this morning. oh my god, i love the presents so much. i cant wait for friday. lemony snicket. get there. omg, did anyone else just watch oprah?! that has to be the best cap off to my day of relaxation and aloneness. except for when i talked to alex on the phone...

its a multi-purpose pulley system

oh the pulley system is gold.

and this is for lec:
entertaining a notion, like entertaining a baby cousin or entertaining a pack of hyenas, is a dangerous thing to refuse to do. If you refuse to entertain a baby cousin, the baby cousin may get bored and entertain itself by wandering off and falling down a well. If you refuse to entertain a pack of hyenas, they may become restless and entertain themselves by devouring you.

that is the whole quote for your viewing and reading pleasure. oh my, we're gonna have so much fun on friday. oh bother that rhymed. oh no it didnt. hoorah!

i like pretty things. i like christmas. alot. i want it to be christmas now.

p.s. i got a work trial this saturday, 10.30-2.30. id tell you to get there, but i dont want you all there, because quite obviously people just take my word for things and listen to an all-commanding person who basically has no idea, which is why me alex and christine are spending a whole day out together pointlessly, really, tomorrow. ive gone off on a tangent, havent i? oh well.

p.p.s. alex, i would have been sooo cut if the child actor from lemony snicket that wsa on oprah was the australian chick, because no australain children are allowed on oprah before us. no one. i probably would have cried. i just abused the screen until i was sure it wasnt her. i dont care how pretty she is.

Mon, 06 Dec 2004 06:36:12 GMT

I am about a million eighty happys right now.

kiss me hard. (once more, with feeling)

Sun, 05 Dec 2004 07:27:14 GMT

Steve's Christmas Party next Saturday night. so getting there. but i'll probably cry, because everybody mocks me so. two years guys, okay....

talked to bek and christine on the phone today. they are both hot girls. ive talked to so many people today. friends are that good, seriously. (oi jo, we should charge admittance... you know what im talking about.... we'd making a fucking fortune)

i cut my foot. i stepped on a random shard of glass and there's this really bad cut on the bottom of my foot and it bled everywhere and it huuuuuuuurrrts. that's my whinge.

*nods head solemnly*

i am dancing and singing and im incredibly giddy. i can't stop smiling.

Some Dates next year to look forward to:

March 3rd - the 'What If Cats and Dogs Had Thumbs' Day
July 10th - 'Don't Step On A Bee' Day
September 19th (this is for lec) - International Talk Like A Pirate Day! get there. i remember this year's one, funniest day of radio in the history of the world. that much fun.

'What If Cats and Dogs Had Thumbs' Day??? Are. You. Fucking. Serious???!?!?! ten bucks says Dolly made that up (yes, the Dolly diary my sister got me as a present is being put to good use)

I want a Double Bass. right now.

silly smiling.

*nods head solemnly*

lover, you should've come over

Sun, 05 Dec 2004 05:21:01 GMT

I seriously will never be able to stop smiling