Yuppie: I myself don’t watch porn, but I am told by trustworthy sources that at least two-thirds of all pornographic movies have no artistic value. – Lower East Side
A Gentile Yuppie: I once dated a Rabbi’s daughter, in the Hamptons. I went to a family barbeque, and he asked me, ‘Do you want cheese on your hamburger?’ and I thought, ‘Ah–this is a moment of truth–one of those key moments in a relationship, where the family will judge me–what should I say?’ and I said, ‘Yes, I would’–and then the Rabbi responded, ‘Great! Then Cheese for Everybody!’” – Bar Tabac, Boerum Hill, Brooklyn
Yuppie: “And I thought, why are you climbing down a hole if you’re wearing a $2,500 shirt?” – Upper East Side
Middle-aged Man: “you know how people all over the world, chinese, african, whatever, they look different”
Middle-aged woman: “”well no matter where you go the chickens of the world, they look the same, ever thought about that”
Middle-aged Man: “I wonder if they speak the same language?” – McDonald’s, by the corner of Houston & Hudson
Young Woman #1: I have to go to this “dungeon” for my Sexual Psychology class. Do you want to come?
Young Woman #2 in her mid-twenties: Is it like an S&M thing?
Young Woman #1: I don’t know. It’s like they act out different sexual
fantasies with whips and stuff.
Young Woman #2: OK, that sounds cool. – Upper East Side
Guy: Lady, you got great legs.
Lady: I’m a lesbian!
Guy: Okay, you’re a lesbian who got great legs.
Lady: Oh…well, thanks. –57th & Park Overheard by: Heather
Businessman: He needs a good beating. He’s starting to lose his mind. –Midtown office
Young Yuppie: You’re such a third-generation American Jew. – 6th Avenue, West Village
Overweight woman: “I honesty think there must be a shortage of fabric or material because all shirts are baby tees and all pants are to small and low on the hips, I dont get it” – Manhattan
Woman on telephone, calling someone back after having the call was dropped: Sorry, we were discommunicated. – Times Square
Young Woman: I don’t think you should do as I do. I mean, I drink a lot. –Greenwich Village Overheard by: Tommy Raiko
Hipster Girl: Hipsterism was made for Jewish guys and Asian Girls. – Williamsburg
Woman upon seeing a Mariachi band walk by: Why do they have tambourines on their legs? – Manhattan
Yuppie #1: I admire the fact that your friends are so intelligent. Most people I speak to are single cell organisms, undergoing mitosis as I speak.
Yuppie #2: Then why do you speak to them?
Yuppie #1: They’re the only ones who call me – Bond Street Starbucks
Yuppie #1: Yesterday we had a strike at Dow Jones.
Yuppie #2: What was it about?
Yuppie #1: Oh, union stuff.
Yuppie #2: What did you do?
Yuppie #1: Well, we all just took a 15-minute lunch break at the same time. It was less a “strike” and more a “coordinated lunch break.” – F train to Brooklyn
Former Columbia student: By and large, Barnard girls are Bi and Large. – East Village, private party full of recent Columbia alumni
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