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[03 Nov 2005|01:06pm] |
Ever read your old journals and think:
"what the fuck was I thinking?!"
yeah i do it too.
new journal:
_kitakyushu
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[14 Sep 2005|08:10pm] |
_kitakyushu
_kitakyushu
_kitakyushu
_kitakyushu
_kitakyushu
_kitakyushu
_kitakyushu
New journal
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[09 Sep 2005|05:27pm] |
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My level of cool surpasses everyone else's leavle of cool. I just feel bad for you because its completly above your comprehension.
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[08 Sep 2005|01:53pm] |
I LOVE DAVIE JONES
yes, Davie Jones from the Monkeys
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[07 Sep 2005|06:33pm] |
Ten hour work shifts rock!
A lot!
No they don't they suck and I'm sleepy.
ksdfjsdafhasgdfkg
come hang out with me yah?
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| I went to your concert and i didnt feel anything |
[05 Sep 2005|02:10pm] |
I ran
I ran 'til my legs burned and I sweated battery acid.
and then I ran some more.
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[31 Aug 2005|04:20pm] |
My parents.
As much as I hate them. I seriously love them.
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| Ohhhhhhhhhh yeah |
[27 Aug 2005|10:15pm] |
Another glips on why you don't want to mess with ME
Hi Billy.
This is Dinorah, Monica's older sister. I think I've met you once, Brian's room mate yes? Anyway-So I've been hearing a lot about you. Monica and Nicole don't seem to understand I can hear everything they talk about and I get a hold of any boy they start 'chatting' with. I am not some dictating sister BUT
I'm hearing TOO much about you.
And I'm pretty sure you can guess Im not okay with that.
I don't care to go on typing what I'm hearing but I do care to share this:
If I hear or read anymore about some 19 year old guy flirting with a girl who is 14 YEARS OLD please believe I will be Nicoles and Monica's company to Youth group every week to make sure you wont be talking to them.
You're 19 years old and you see anything wrong with that? I don't care if you're just playing around or this is just your 'personality'. whatever it is I do not like it. And two 14 year olds don't see it as "playing" Little high school girls take this stuff a little over the top and make it their lives. So this shit needs to stop now.
with that said; choose your next move wisely. Simply put. This letter is as nice as I get.
-Dinorah Rene Santana
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[26 Aug 2005|01:42pm] |
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mood |
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annoyed |
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| [ |
music |
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Peter singing 'one love' |
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WHY IS IT SO FREAKING HOT TODAY?!
my god.
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| Parched |
[23 Aug 2005|05:15pm] |
My voice in now completly gone. I speak in wispers now. Thats kind of hot now that I think about it. Nah, I just sound like an 80 year old smoker. Ewwwww. Thatss kind of hot now that I think of it. This can go on forever so I'm stoping.
Is anyone else freaking out that they do not start school in two weeks?
I mean it JUST hit me I am not a high school student anymore.
I think I took too much dayquil because I feel really weird. And I have a deep craving for anything with mint in them.
till next time loves
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| arriwhead mountain spring water |
[21 Aug 2005|12:48pm] |
Dear people.
I have the best two jobs in the world. envy me, yeah?
love
me
ps. I have money in the bank. Uh huh thats right. I am a grown up. MmmHmmm
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[18 Aug 2005|07:29pm] |
I havent updated
because there is not that much to update about
Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Here:
Moving forward using all my breath
Making love to you was never second best
I saw the world crashing all around your face
Never really knowing it was always mesh and lace
I'll stop the world and melt with you
You've seen the difference and it's getting better all the time
And there's nothing you and I won't do
I'll stop the world and melt with you
(We should know better) Dream of better lives the kind which never hate
(We should see) Trapped in a state of imaginary grace
(We should know better) I made a pilgrimage to save this human's race
(We should see) Never comprehending a race that's long gone by
(Let's stop the world) I'll stop the world and melt with you
(Let's stop the world) You've seen the difference and it's getting better all the time
And there's nothing you and I won't do
(Let's stop the world) I'll stop the world and melt with you
The future's open wide
I'll stop the world and melt with you
(I'll stop the world) You've seen some changes and it's getting better all the time
And there's nothing you and I won't do
(I'll stop the world) I'll stop the world and melt with you
The future's open wide
hmmm hmmm hmmm
hmmm hmmm hmmm hmmm
hmmm hmmm hmmm
hmmm hmmm hmmm hmmm
I'll stop the world and melt with you
(I'll stop the world) You've seen the difference and it's getting better all the time
And there's nothing you and I won't do
(I'll stop the world) I'll stop the world and melt with you
I'll stop the world and melt with you (I'll stop the world and melt with you)
I'll stop the world and melt with you (I'll stop the world and melt with you)
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[11 Aug 2005|11:01am] |
north park
here we come
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| This is the song I sing for my dad. |
[09 Aug 2005|09:01am] |
its funny because most sing it to their ex-boyfriends/girlfriends. Its what I've been playing all morning and it helps.
Read the lyrics.
love me.
It could all be so simple
But you'd rather make it hard
Loving you is like a battle
And we both end up with scars
Tell me, who I have to be
To get some reciprocity
No one loves you more than me
And no one ever will
Is this just a silly game
That forces you to act this way
Forces you to scream my name
Then pretend that you can't stay
Tell me, who I have to be
To get some reciprocity
No one loves you more than me
And no one ever will
(Hook:)
No matter how I think we grow
You always seem to let me know
It ain't workin'
It ain't workin'
And when I try to walk away
You'd hurt yourself to make me stay
This is crazy
This is crazy
I keep letting you back in
How can I explain myself
As painful as this thing has been
I just can't be with no one else
See I know what we got to do
You let go and I'll let go too
'Cause no one's hurt me more than you
And no one ever will
Care for me, care for me
I know you care for me
There for me, there for me
Said you'd be there for me
Cry for me, cry for me
You said you'd die for me
Give to me, give to me
Why won't you live for me
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[07 Aug 2005|04:40pm] |
Let me clear my throat.
somethings
_Getting back into yoga is pretty much the best thing for me. Going right back into the advanced classes was no problem. Im pretty freaking bendy.
_venting is a good thing
_pollyester never went out of style. I don't care what they say.
_Peter got me a type writter. Everything I write using it seems more personal.
_there is no backspace on a type writer. I guess the same in life.
_I screamsing in the shower
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| Dear journal |
[05 Aug 2005|10:40pm] |
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music |
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sonic youth "goo" |
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I wrote down the day I got the phone call Sam was dead that it forced me to look deeper. But seven months later and I'm not sure what it is excatly I'm looking deeper into. Myself maybe? Too easy to say that. Looking into myself would invole me being out of myself and looking in. I think you have to be dead to do that; pretty sure. Looking deeper into life? Maybe. But for some reason the only meaning of life I've come up with is the morning I ditched school to walk around down town at six in the morning. I remember that was when I didn't wash my hair and it was sticking up all over the place. With my leg warmers on and my hoodie that didn't match my skirt I walked amoung the men and women in bussiness suits and coffees in their hands. My headphones blasted radiohead's OK computer. And I remember thinking "if this is the only thing that makes me happy, what the hell Am I doing." And thats as far as looking deeper into life as it goes for me.
I hate to play the loner card as much as I have been. I hate being alone. I don't like being left alone with myself. I think about awful things that I have no control of. I waste energy into crying, when there is no reason to cry. I want to promise myself I'll only cry when it matters. When I miss Sam or when I cry for my grandmother. But lately I feel like I make crying for them less because I waste tears on this hole inside me I've put there myself.
I tried praying last night. But I forgot how to be catholic. I've given up on faith and hope because both of those words feel so empty I become bitter and angry.
I've been feeling lost.
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[05 Aug 2005|04:23am] |
New Layout
is is 4:23 and i am still awake
wooooo
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| Sometimes |
[04 Aug 2005|11:39am] |
I think I have been adopted by some irish family.
and it feels nice.
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| Dear poeple planning on having kids |
[27 Jul 2005|01:43pm] |
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mood |
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needless to say |
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if you plan on consistently fucking them over do not have them.
Thank you Mother for being so dazed out on sleeping pills and thinking every little thing in this world is about you. Thank you father for being a stupid 40 year old junkie who won't get out of the mind set of a 14 year old angry boy.
thanks again. i really admire the both of you.
love me.
ps. I am loosing bone mass because my diet on coffee.
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_jetplanes's journal