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Eaten by Aphids. Part I
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Jul. 22nd, 2005 @ 05:46 pm
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Yes. That's right. I died over a month ago. Chilling with Jimmy Hoffa is only entertaining for so long though.
I come here from beyond the grave to say a few things.
Lifetime is reuniting at Hellfest this summer, which would be incredible news...if Hellfest didn't suck.
Staying up nearly until dawn to talk to friends in the Phillipines is awesome. Breaking into their house to have an awesome welcome back barbeque is even better.
Winning money for playing video games means I haven't wasted my life. I'm still far from digging myself out of a titanic sinkhole of debt.
The internet is serious business
If anyone can find me the original serious business picture...
I'm leaving livejournal for my new internet home. Thanks to RSS, I'll still be checking some journals regularly. Since my new thing is offsite, it requires a minimal amount of effort to actually read regularly, which is probably not worth the crap I'll be putting there. But if you download firefox, you can use Live Bookmarks, and whenever I make a new post, it'll be updated in your bookmarks list. 0:
Yeah. Sorry this wasn't more entertaining, I just suck all the time today. |
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So I got this in the mail today
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Jun. 14th, 2005 @ 09:46 pm
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I think it is pretty self explanatory, anyone else get one? My friend lives across the street from Neverland, I'm gonna transfer the invittion to him.
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Hoping For A Tsunami
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Jun. 14th, 2005 @ 09:19 pm
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In 4 minutes, the initial waves from the earthquake 300miles NW of San Francisco will hit...San Francisco. I'm excited, and I'm totally going to the beach tomorrow to dig up giant squids and abandoned Soviet Subs.
Edit: Well, the warning has been called off, just like my day of fabulous sand adventures tomorrow. |
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This Bandwagon Crashed Two Years Ago
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Jun. 13th, 2005 @ 11:26 am
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After a phone call with a friend of mine about the Howard Dean remix, I was compelled to try my own. Eventually, I was struck with inspiration. 30 minutes and 2 Ruby Grapefruit Juice Squeezes later, I was finished.
Enjoy: Howard Dean - Promises Kept
And if anyone out there wants to join in, and has any sort of audio editing promgrams on their computer, the following, and a bit of imagination, is all you'll need.
The Original Clip, edit to your heart's delight. |
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xGERALDOx says: Stephen beats kids up with BRASS KNUCKLES
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Jun. 10th, 2005 @ 02:54 am
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| » Stephen Wins The Internet |
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I've been doing stuff all weekend. I left my house saturday afternoon, expecting to go to my friend's house, and then return home later in the afternoon. This wasn't the case, and everything that I had left running on my computer continued running. This includes AIM.
Now, for the common AIM user, this may not seem like such an incredible feat. I find the idea of being online for that much time disgusting and a true testament to just how worthless your time really is. The only thing that lets me maintain my dignity is the fact that during all that time, I was only truly online for a few hours max.
To further show that i win the internet, examine this picture closely.
Jun. 6th, 2005 @ 02:35 am
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| » Pack Your Fists Full Of Hate, Take A Swing At The World... |
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Tonight I learned that when you get punched in the head hard enough, you see something a lot like this. It makes a lot of sense actually.
One month without shows took it's toll on me.
"by the end of this set I want two black eyes. TWO! BLACK! EYES!"
There is something to be said about 30+ hardcore kids and a band crammed into a 16' x 14' box, where punches, steel chairs, and guitars are thrown in the crowd and where clothes, hair, and flesh are torn, and all I know is I'm swinging my fists, my voice is hoarse, and I taste blood in my mouth, and I'm happy.
Here's to feeling alive.
Jun. 4th, 2005 @ 01:10 am
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| » The Way of the Away Message |
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A long long time before I ever ventured into the land of Livejournal, I used to put up sarcastic and slightly comedic away messages in order to breathe life into a very very tacky and boring method of leaving a message. Over time, I started using AIM less and less, and those away messages no longer held any relevance. Well, now I am back on the internet using shitty away messages just like everyone else. A few weeks ago, I decided I was going to do a covert study of away messages and just how absolutely meaningless they really are. Is it really necessary to state that you arent at the computer in a message that is triggered...when you're not at the computer? Do I have to be assaulted with your entire day's schedule when i just sent a message to say 'hi'? No. Away messages need to be less accidentally offensive, and more intentionally offensive.
( MORE STUFF THAT YOU SHOULD READ, YARRRR )
May. 31st, 2005 @ 11:36 pm
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| » You Can't Cheat Death Twice |
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There are times where I just want to kick the shit out of myself for being such an idiot.
As many of you may know, over the summer in Nicaragua, I left my camera in a bathroom on the beach of San Juan del Sur. I went back a couple hours later looking for it, didn't, and then panicked. I managed to find the cleaning ladies, and talk to them. Eventually, one of them came out of her house holding it in her hand, and I thanked her. Thankfully, she was kind enough to actually care, and give back what she knew she had stolen.
Just today, I went into a McDonald's with Dominic, and we got some food because we were starving. We were btoh on our way to my little brother's play. I noticed that the play was starting in about 10 minutes, so we darted out of there. After we had arrived at the theatre, I noticed that I didn't have my backpack on me. Immediately, I sprinted back to the McDonald's, only to come up empty handed. A mere 15 minutes had passed, if even that. I panicked, and asked the women who were sitting where Dominic and I had. Nothing. I asked behind the counter. Nothing. I asked the janitor. Nothing. Nobody had any knowledge of anything that i was saying, and it didn't necessarily help that I was speaking Spanish and flipping out at the same time.
I ran inventory in my head of what hd been taken. My iRiver, approximately $400, was gone, along with the $30 headphones sitting in it. My digital camera, approximately $300, along with a $100 memory card which had luckily just been uploaded, was gone. Finally, and most important to me, my yearbook was gone, after I had pretty much reached completion in terms of who I absolutely needed to sign it.
The first two were replaceable. Granted they may be expensive, i can always go out and get another camera or mp3 player, but the yearbook actually had some significance to me, sentimental value. I may have bitched about how most of the things people wrote in there weren't as meaningful or deep as i was hoping they would be. But nothing can compare to not even having those entries, however mediocre or however important they were. They were something, and now it's gone. All I'm left with are the vague recollections of what people wrote, and the way it looked, and the color of pen they used. And over time, those details will fade just like all others, and I wont have the actual object in front of me to remind me. They will fade into nothing.
Damn near $1000 were stolen from me...
...along with my memories.
May. 27th, 2005 @ 10:12 pm
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| » Time Slips Away |
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Yearbooks came out today, and I would like to further elaborate on my half page. Specifically the Champion quote. I dont think the small section I chose fully expresses what it should have, so here is the full song.
Champion - Time Slips Away
Four years of my life that I'm never getting back and it hurts so much to realize. The days, the years I can never live again. Painstaking, heart broken, filled with regret. Yea it's like the time is slipping through the cracks. But now, now I wish that I could take it back, but it's never coming back. And I thought I knew a better way. I'd lose myself in anything that could take away the pain. Years spent running and I never knew the cost. But shattered mirrors and broken hearts finally showed me what I'd lost. Yea it's like the time is slipping through the cracks. But now, now I wish that I could take it back. We've all been lost before we've all been knocked to the ground. Let go of our regrets and find the strength to turn it around. I know it might seem far too late but we're just about to break these chains that have always held us back. We've made our own mistakes, now it's time to set it straight. And live our lives. Be who we need to be and let our hearts be free. Now we live our lives. Be who we need to be and let our hearts be free.
May. 18th, 2005 @ 07:27 pm
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| » Sometimes the only path to take, is the hardest one to walk |
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After working damn near 6 hours straight on my senior project, I just had to get out of my house and see the sun. For the first time in days I was just genuinely happy. Not the kind of happy where shit isn't on your mind anymore, because it was all still there. I was just looking at everything a lot differently.
( some of the pictures I took as I wandered )
May. 10th, 2005 @ 07:38 pm
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| » Grafedia |
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Possibly the coolest idea ever. Anyone into art and the internet should jump on this now. Everything you need to know is at the following address.
http://www.grafedia.net
May. 4th, 2005 @ 08:50 pm
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| » PSSSSST, I have a secret |
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Props to Patrick for this find. People send postcards with secrets written on them. Some are fun. SOme are sad. SOme make me hate people. Enjoy!
http://www.postsecret.blogspot.com/
Apr. 6th, 2005 @ 12:08 am
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| » I KLUPPAN IKEA |
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Not once, but twice did I have to venture out to East Palo Alto to go to IKEA, the queen of painful labyrinths. My parents decided to take me there to get a bed, in order to give me some reason to ever come back to this house after I move out. I looked towards the washing machine and giggled to myself, but said nothing. I didn't want to miss out on a free bed.
I passed out on the way there because I was tired. I can't quite remember why, but I was.
Upon entering the bright colors and silly symbols above the letters in the store frightened me. I grabbed a cart, but to my dismay it was 4-wheel drive. My regards to the parents of the three kids near the escalator, I just couldnt turn the damn thing. Once I got up the escaltor, I grabbed some nifty golf pencils with IKEA charre dinto the side, and a map of the store. I navigated the labyrinth with great ease, thanks to my two Native American guides.
I reached the self serve furniture aisles with a shopping list in my hand with randomly scrawled out numbers. They meant nothing to me and my guides, so we wandered for some time looking at all the pretty pictures next to the boxes. When we found something that looked almost like what I kinda wanted, then we grabbed it and put it on my off-road 4WD shopping slab, since its hardly a cart. After all the necessary meterials were placed on the slabe, I struggled to push it out the building, around cars, and around the buildign where our van was squeezed somewhere between a handicap spot and a CXT. However, halfway there my mattress decided it didnt want to be with me, and commit suicide. For about fifty feet I could hear it scraping against the hot asphalt until it finally flipped over into traffic. I cursed IKEA and its shotty carts and attempted to put it back on the cart. It resisted, but eventually gave up and fell down flat on my boxes.
I finally reached the car, and opened it up. Putting everythign into the car would ahve been easy if these boxes didnt weight twice as much as I did. I managed to get the first 3 in, but the last one nearly cost me my life. First of all, I couldnt get it our of my goddamn 4WD cart. In a perfectly synchronized move, I lifted the massive box out of the cart and kicked it away. I would have cheered if the giant box hadnt started to fall on me. I regained composure and lifted it off the ground. My kegs shook, and I fell into the trunk, with box in hand. An onlooker jumped out of there car and raced towards me. I gave him the thumbs up as I used some junior high wrestling moves on it and rolled it into the truck.
Then somehow I ended up here, writing this shit off the top of my head and not packing for the desert trip. I dont really want to go anymore...
Mar. 19th, 2005 @ 05:41 pm
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| » My Dreams |
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I am lazy
all photos taken by me
Hello, hello. I am a vandalized Anakin picture, and I am now the posterboy for the incredibly shitty things people can take waste film on. Soon, my face will become the image used to rate shitty pictures. Yes...YES...YESSSS...
Today's theme is CARS.
My Dream Car #1
My Dream Car #2
My Dream Car #3
Mar. 16th, 2005 @ 09:35 pm
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| » Batman's Greatest Boner |
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The saddest part about this is that it is completely real, and Kyle cannot do anything to it in Photooshop to make it better. As it is, it stands as a testament to the awesomness of the 50s and their liberal use of penis jokes, even if they were unaware of it at the time.
http://www.redshirt.co.uk/media/batman/
Mar. 9th, 2005 @ 08:03 pm
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| » Man vs. Monkey |
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Man vs. MonkeyMouse
Well, I was going to write about Monkey-Man fights, but I'll save that for a later day. Right now I must discuss some urgent and fascinating news about the school I will be attending next year. This is also part 1 of 2 in the "excellent stories about college" series. Next episode will be UCLA.
At Stanford, the University Ethics Committee greenlighted a project to create mice with human brains. We are all accustomed to mice's plans for world domination, but it is dangerous to assist them in anyway. The project could continue but "If the mouse shows human-like behaviours, like improved memory or problem-solving, or the construction of weapons of mass destruction, it's time to stop." Silly scientists and their morals. How come when they find a use for rodents, people start throwing fits, but when we're growing ears there are no objections.
The applications of thinking mice are endless. In fact, word on the street is we're teaching mice to fly fighter jets. America rocks. Fuck yeah.
Mar. 8th, 2005 @ 07:06 pm
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| » EXTRA! EXTRA! |
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My LJ picture is officially the best thing ever.
Mar. 1st, 2005 @ 11:29 pm
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| » A Long Long Time Ago... |
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The Sith certainly have been busy since the demise of their leaders Sidious and Vader. After the destruction of, not one, but two death stars left the Sith demoralized and very much dead, it seems that a third one has been constructed by the remnants of the Sith race. Due to the fact that this occured a long long time ago, it appears that the Third Death star is derelict, battered by the storm of meteors a million years running.
 
Death Star 3 vs Death Star 1
The Death Star orbits Saturn, and quite possibly will be the demise of life on Earth. Undoubtedly, this third Death Star will fire its turbolasers at Earth before May 19th, the day when the final bit of bastardization of the Star Wars name occurs, and George Lucas is finally wiped off the Earth for raping his own child, one of the largest Science Fiction franchises ever.
P.S. Han Shot First
Feb. 16th, 2005 @ 09:38 pm
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