[Most Recent Entries]
Below are the 3 most recent journal entries recorded in
|Tuesday, June 8th, 2004|
I just finished aruing with Stacy. She told me that Jen was online, but she wouldn't tell her that I was online. It gets me so frustrated. She kept on saying how whenever Jen talks to me, her mood totally goes down. That kind of made me feel bad. She said that Jen's been having really good moods lately, she doesn't want her to talk to me because I guess I'll ruin it. I just want to talk to her so bad. And yes, you guessed it, I'm crying. Not water works, but there's still tears. I can't stop thinking about her. Stacy said to me "you have a 'girlfriend' anyway so what would you want to talk to Jen for". Well, Hanna's not really my girlfriend but whatever. I do like her alot, I wont lie. It just makes me feel guilty. I miss Jen soooo much. I can't really type anymore. I guess I'll start updating more often.
|Sunday, May 30th, 2004|
If there is one person you can't stop thinking about, post this same exact sentence in your journal.
So I talked to Jen last night. At 10pm here, so 1am there. I'm not sure how long we talked, but I am sure that it was the "EMO" feeling. Sad, Happy, Mad, everything. She snuck on as her drowning sn, and i im'ed her. I wasn't sure if I should've, but I did. I thought it would be her mom when I sent it. Then I started to get really nervous (sweating, shaking, my heart was racing, biting my nails non stop). I was so scared! And then I got a message back, it was my Jen. She said she shouldn't be replying to my message. We got to talking about how she's wanted to im me but stacy talked her out of it each time, except for last night since stace was out of town and all. So, yeah. We didn't talk about much, but there's not much to talk about. We talked about The Movielife's break-up<3333 R.I.P. We sung Hey by them lol. Good times. It's funny, I thought I missed her a lot as it was. But I realise how much I REALLY miss her when I talk to her. I went on palace and there were these couples EVERYWHERE. Like how Jen and I used to be. It was terrible. It was kind of ironic how she signed on to her old sn. I've been "internet stalking" her live journal and stuff, I was thinking about trying to find her on her other sn, but I was too scared. God, "I lose control 'cause I've been waiting"...."I've got butterflies"-Waking Ashland-long shot. That's how I felt last night. AND THEN.... When Jen went to get some sleep, one of my "friends" got online and I was like, "I'm sooooo happy!! Nothing could bring me down!!! I talked to my Jen <3333!" She was like, "Oh God, I'm gonna puke! Shut up you freak." I didn't care though. I was like..."I'm such a cool emo guy!" she goes,"emo fuckin sucks faggot!" nothin yet, i was still happy. i go,"i do not care. if youve been through what I have you'd understand and come to love emo!" she goes..."everything you've been through is your fault dumbass!" i started getting pissed, i said..."its MY fault my father's a druggie?!?! it's MY fault my sister died?!?!" she goes, "hahahah she got sick of you!!!" im about to die now cause she was my world!!! i go,"perhaps senses fail says it best...187 <33'i wanna kill you!!!!!!'"...I know i know, it wasnt right but yeah. then a little more back and forth trash talking, stuff about us going homeless/poor. she makes fun of me for it and i blocked her. well she signs on to her other sn and is like "uh aaron...what just happened?!" i reply, "leave me alone, you've done enough damage. you win! just go!" she goes, "i wasnt even here, i left my friend in the room, when i came back she closed the window and said,'i HATE emo!!!!' and she left"blah...i didnt know what to think, i still dont. im avoiding her by any means necessary. I broke down last night, It was a very yo-yo day. right now im listening to drive thru bands...hellogoodbye<3...Im gonna go now, I shall go watch Ellen Degeneres stuff..... later- Aaron
ps....Everything Else Emo a good band name or what?! lol