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| Monday, June 8th, 2009 | | 11:40 am |
how many of you have your cell through verizon?please listen to the new balmorhea album 'all is wild, all is silent' and previous album 'rivers arms'. it's like goldmund / library tapes minimalist piano with kaki king's more melodic fingerstyle arrangements mixed with the books and a little rachel's thrown in. so beautiful it will break your heart. http://www.myspace.com/balmorhea Current Music: balmorhea - rivers arms - lament | | Friday, May 29th, 2009 | | 4:08 pm |
on nuclear chickens coming home to roost
"There is a limit to our patience," its Foreign Ministry said in a statement carried on the official Korean Central News Agency. "The nuclear test conducted in our nation this time is the Earth's 2,054th nuclear test. The five permanent members of the U.N. Security Council have conducted 99.99 percent of the total nuclear tests." Current Music: donnacha costello - colorseries | | Tuesday, May 26th, 2009 | | 11:30 am |
fear and hate amended into california constitution
 Cali Supreme Court Upholds Prop 8. http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2009/05/26/BAE017PTAD.DTLamend the constitution to make it broader and ensure the freedom of all people but amending it to revoke the rights of some makes any mention of liberty or justice or equality in the california constitution absolutely worthless. california has shamed itself and broken the hearts of people across the nation looking for an example of hope and humanity in the face of irrational fear and hate. if you have enough money and influence you can make anyone you don't like disappear. Current Music: codeine - pickup song - frigid stars | | 8:24 am |
"But you're still a human being, you still want to live, you crave connection and society, you know intellectually that you're no less worthy of connection and society than anyone else simply because of how you appear, you know that hiding yourself away out of fear of gazes is really giving in to a shame that is not required and that will keep you from the kind of life you deserve as much as the next girl, you know that you can't help how you look but that you are supposed to be able to help how much you care about how you look. You're supposed to be strong enough to exert some control over how much you want to hide, and you're so desperate to feel some kind of control that you settle for the appearance of control." david foster wallace - infinite jest Current Music: galaxie 500 | | Monday, May 25th, 2009 | | 12:36 pm |
cannes announces awards.
i am incredibly excited for chan-wook park's 'thirst', which i had read about but only watched footage from now upon reading of his award. i am critical of the horror genre because it too often relies on sensory stimulation solely and little substance. the best horror films to come out in the US were back in the 70's / early 80's before excessive gore and shock became so chic and accepted. there have been small scenes in asian, mexican, italian, and french cinema that have consistently brought much finer horror films that give you a lasting, unsettling feeling rather than a thrill ride that you are glad when it's over. regardless, it will be damn good and i'm sure the best i've seen since the orphanage and pan's labyrinth.
andrea arnold who's film 'red road' made me as excited as ratcatcher (lynne ramsay) and the holy girl (lucrecia martel) for women directing in new wave cinema, won a jury prize for 'fish tank' with park.
i liked haneke's 'the piano teacher' so i'd love to see 'the white ribbon'. i have seen nothing by jacques audiard or brilliante mendoza so that is something to look forward to. despite the uproar, charlotte gainsbourg won for best actress in von trier's 'antichrist' which i think allays some of my concern that the violence against a woman in 'antichrist' isn't just sick self-gratification for von trier. alain resnais is entirely deserving of the lifetime achievement award. night and fog is a short film / documentary of the holocaust that will never leave you and resnais found a way to portray it that no other filmmaker has been able to. hiroshima, mon amour / the war is over / providence are all amazing and indelible examples of cinema.
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i watched 'goodbye solo' by ramin bahrani. a film as tender, quiet, and observant of the intersecting nuances of the human condition as my favorite film of last year, 'the visitor'. please watch it. i highly recommend his other film 'chop shop' and i definitely need to check out 'man push cart'.
Current Music: Nadja - When I See the Sun Always Shines on TV - Only Shallow (My Bloody Valenti | | Sunday, May 24th, 2009 | | 10:07 am |
the only problem james blackshaw has is that when you have reached the perfection of your art at such an early stage, where do you now? but somehow he still does something new with each record while not digressing into pretentious, experimental obscurity and retaining his otherworldly and pastoral guitar playing. please go here and download "cross", the first track off the new album on young god (and listen to everything on young god if you haven't already). it contains some steve reich-eqsue rhythmic, vocal harmonies that instead of utilizing words are used as instruments. he's john fahey on a 12 string and i definitely will not miss him on tour this time if he actually gets out here.
speaking of fingerstyle guitar, i've tried acrylic nails but one can't take even press-ons uh... on and off like i would need to since i play so often but at various times of the day. apparently ani difranco uses electrical tape but i'm guessing this is for performances and i don't want to be taking it off and on all the time. i have relatively strong nails and shaped just fine but i inevitably do things that break or chip them. have any of you tried nail conditioner or whatever that is? what are the secrets to stronger nails?
going to head out to portland today to either see goodbye solo or silent light and walk around and fuck around with the new camera. clockwork orange is playing at mission but i don't know if i feel like driving home at 11 at night.
it's okay to be afraid
it's okay to be afraid
it's okay to be afraid. Current Music: james blackshaw | | Thursday, May 21st, 2009 | | 10:08 pm |
| | Tuesday, May 19th, 2009 | | 7:00 pm |
| | 5:16 pm |
geargasm
this will only appeal to like ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) dubpulse and maybe people that like good electro / hip hop but my god leave me inside this room and let me play all night long.
the channel (xl8r tv) is really good. they even have like a 5 episode "portland peeps" series of the amazing talent from the best city on the west coast. honey owens (valet / jackie-o motherfucker / nudge) e*rock, adam forkner (yume bitsu / jackie-o / surface of eceon) etc. Current Music: steinski - what does it all mean? | | 3:40 pm |
the scene: fred meyer's. former workplace and source of delicious meal making ingredients. aka corporate la la land. at the magazine rack looking at a digital photography magazine. a short, disheveled man perusing a magazine to my right. kind of guy that could be your harmless beer-drinkin' neighbor or a serial killer. flip of the coin as to which. i see him glance over at me (if you are near me i am watching you even if i am not looking at you) and see the dreaded motion to make social contact.
him: "check out this tattoo!"
he shows me a photo of MMA fighter brock lesnar who is proudly displaying a tattoo down the length of his chest of a sword.
me: "heh" or some equivalent auditory signal of recognition that did not display my feelings that i cared not one bit for the photo of a very bad tattoo on a gigantic ball of meat with legs.
him: "i tell you... (please don't) i was looking at one of these other tattoo magazines and there was this woman (thank you for at least not saying "chick") stark ass naked, pussy shaved but you couldn't tell she was naked 'cause her entire body was covered in tattoos!"
i am putting down my magazine and mentally planning my escape.
me: "yeah, that's crazy."
him: "man, that shit must be expensive. i couldn't do it. but she was still hot!"
he turns back to his magazine smiling and i make an elaborate escape in walking very fast to the exit.
------
now, this is a relatively benign interaction, his statement on the absence of pubic hair on the woman's genitals was no doubt observationally accurate, and he was trying to be friendly. he was not intimidating or forceful in any way but he didn't have to be to make me uncomfortable and generally give me a creepy vibe. when talking to a close friend who experiences constant sexual harassment from innuendo, forceful advances, whispered comments, ape-like chest-thumping displays from her male co-workers, she related that when talking to the male she lives with he immediately discounts her. she doesn't have a thick enough skin and that's just how men are (conveniently including himself). for a current event parallel this is the equivalent of a coward like dick cheney defending waterboarding without ever having experienced it himself. this is also completely ignorant of the fact that women experience this objectification on a constant basis every single day in ways that men never have and subsequently could not have any real understanding of. it doesn't take intimidation, it doesn't take "crossing the line", it doesn't take physical interaction to have your heart broken by simply being reminded. face it, you can never know what it's like to be put through what women have for the history of humanity and if that doesn't elicit an immediate response of empathy in hopes of understanding to the best of your ability then you don't deserve an answer, your excuses are worthless, and you will continue to "not get women".
i don't want to talk to you about how "hot" that "chick" is. i don't have an opinion on her "rack" nor do i have any interest in reducing the beauty of a woman's form to a package to be judged acceptable or not acceptable while having no knowledge of the woman's thoughts or how she feels about life. i don't think a "bitch" should have to "suck your dick" because she dared to complain about something in your place of work. i don't want to be your "bro" and i don't want to accept your lowered intelligence and actions that have no excuse because i'm "just being a man" like you.
i want to go for a walk and get lost on purpose. i want to dip my toes in the water's edge. i want to, for once, be okay spending time with someone that is absolutely quiet. i want to plant flowers and pluck vegetables off the vine. i want to ride bikes and have you teach me how to do so without hands (i still don't know how, it scares me). i want to talk about the future contraction of the entire universe, about the way the road home always seems shorter than the start of the journey, about thomas merton and religious devotion, about whatever you need to let out because everywhere else it's not masculine to express your feelings. i want to hear about the women you respect and love in your life. i want to relate to you as a man not because of how closely you adhere to ugly, pathetic tradition but because of how important it is to fight it with everything you have because of the love and respect you have for those very women in your life. i want to hug my gay friends and tell them how much i love them instead of demeaning them to assert my heterosexuality. i want something more than this, i want something more beautiful than i can stand.
if you can't offer that (it isn't hard. it's the hardest thing in the world.) then kindly accept my resignation from your boring pathos, your self-aggrandizing and repetitive ritual, your complete lack of action where it matters the most. i'd rather spend my time alone with my "bitch" re:
(Pronunciation:
\ˈbich\
Function:
noun
Etymology:
Middle English bicche, from Old English bicce
Date:
before 12th century
1: the female of the dog or some other carnivorous mammals)
my little pekingese dog, chloe who barks just as much as you but loves better than you'll ever know how and contemplate the conflicting emotions of wanting to punch your fucking teeth in because you just called someone's mother / sister / daughter a "cunt". Current Music: valet - naked acid | | Monday, May 18th, 2009 | | 3:52 pm |
von trier's "antichrist" shocks the sensitive sensibilities of cannes film critic audience. they could be entirely right but i doubt it because they rarely are.
What does this metaphor (with a Prologue, an Epilogue and Four Chapters) mean? The dinner conversations all over town must not have been appetizing. Some read it this way: Perhaps the world began with man evil instead of good, guilty instead of innocent. That the Garden of Eden was visited by the Antichrist, not the Lord. That man's Original Sin was not eating from the Tree of Knowledge, but not vomiting forth knowledge and purging himself.
All for this will be discussed at great length. What can be said is that von Trier, after what many found the agonizing boredom of his previous Cannes films "Dogville" and "Manderlay," has made a film that is not boring. Unendurable, perhaps, but not boring. For relief I am looking forward to the overnight reviews of those who think they can explain exactly what it means. In this case, perhaps, a film should not mean, but be.
tokyo! is swimming about the torrent sites. please download it and let me know what you think.
here is ebert on the new film by bong joon-ho who directed my favorite section of tokyo! (shaking tokyo):
Yesterday's most blazingly good (and funny) film was Bong Joon-ho's "Mother", another dark comedy from Korea. Although he had a cult hit in the U.S. with his 2006 film "The Host", his earlier features "Barking Dogs Never Bite" and "Memories of Murder" have only been seen on the festival circuit or in cinematheques. "Mother" is very likely to open a few more theater doors in the West.
"Mother" opens with actress Kim Hye-ja, a woman beyond middle-age, incongruously dancing in a grassy field, and ends with her even more incongruously carefree dance in the aisle of a tour bus as the full effect of Bong's narrative sleight-of-hand sinks in. He leads us on, plays with our sympathies, and makes us pay big-time for falling for Kim's irresistibly eccentric Mom. Mom owns an herb shop in a small town, practices acupuncture without a license on the side, and lives for her grown, but not grown-up, son Do-joon, a young man blessed with a beautiful face and a dim brain. She's doting and ditzy and given to nonsensical platitudes like "Always eat well after coming back from the police station."
He's an annoying but harmless clown who collects lost golf balls and still sleeps in his mother's bed. Trouble is Do-joon's middle name, and when he's accused of the murder of a pretty girl with a questionable reputation, Mom ramps up her wily pit bull act on his behalf, determined to prove him innocent at any cost, despite the fact that the whole town seems to have it in for him based on circumstantial evidence.
Mom's tough, sneaky and hilariously resilient, and she thinks on her feet. There's a wonderful sequence where she breaks into the house of Do-joon's best friend looking for clues, then has to creep out with what she thinks is a piece of evidence after the man and his teenage girlfriend arrive home with amorous intentions. It develops that both Mom and Do-joon have secrets, and Bong keeps smashing our assumptions with a sledge-hammer right up to the final frame.
please watch "the host" and "memories of murder" too while you are at it.
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it is a sad day for one who does not know the pleasure of a plate of curry. speaking of which... Current Music: hum - green to me | | 2:18 pm |
fake plastic trees
i will never understand people who dump chemicals on nature to make it grow. Current Music: hum - suicide machine | | Sunday, May 10th, 2009 | | 4:04 pm |
i am a strange loop
little, swooshing horses of the sea once stood up to dance with thee.
i am upset about the news coming out of afghanistan and i don't know how not to think (someone out there no longer has a mother / i deserve your chains to set you free) and difficult to make light but every chance you have to thank the women in your life you should. all the love in the world to mothers young and old, women known and unknown (always).
i found bergman's "cries and whispers" criterion collection for $4 but it's just not right for tonight so man with a movie camera it is. Current Music: empress - it never seems to end | | Friday, May 1st, 2009 | | 4:37 pm |
what digital camera do you use? why do you love it? why do you hate it? what digital camera would you like to have if you don't have it now? experiences with DSLRs would be greatly appreciated.
please read - "flow: the psychology of optimal experience" by mihaly csikszentmihalyi. one of the most important books on consciousness i've read since frankl's "man's search for meaning". i'm serious. quit your job if you're working and go down to your nearest independent bookseller and at least read the introduction which is only like 20 pages. if you'd like i can call you and read it to you until you fall asleep.
i am drinking absinthe out of a small glass with gingerbread men and snowflakes on it. the wind is whipping through the window and the quiet before a storm is the most beautiful thing in the world if you know how to look at it right.
love you (always), talk soon. Current Music: vadislav delay - the four quarters / the field - from here we go sublime | | Sunday, April 5th, 2009 | | 9:21 pm |
tokyo!
i can't say how beautiful it was and it will be top 5 of this year. i am obviously a huge gondry fan, love bong joon-ho (please watch memories of murder and the host), and have never seen any of carax's work (i'll be fixing that right away). i wasn't sure what to expect but the stories are all about purpose and our presence in society viewed through the backdrop of a massive and alienating city like tokyo.
it starts with gondry's "interior design" which is just touching, warm with humor, and all the graces of beauty that gondry is known for. i won't ruin the story for you but it's absolutely precious and if gondry was sitting next to me i would have kissed him. maybe with a little tongue.
then everything gets shaken up with carax's piece "merde" ("shit" in french) which is both horrifying and beguiling but ultimately a meditation on staring into the abyss and the beasts that can come from our darkest sides to completely shatter our illusions of conformity and familiarity. it's a clever play on japanese monster films but weaving in allusions to japan's involvement in WWII. again, don't want to give away the story but the actor that played merde was absolutely brilliant and reminded me a lot of jodorowsky's character in "santa sangre". ask him what he wants for his last meal. he says, "flowers and cash".
after the unsettling but mystical ending of "merde" we get bong joon-ho's "shaking tokyo" which was so deeply affecting for me i wanted to stand up and cheer but that would have looked odd since there were only two other people in the theater with me. his other films are about dark themes but they are always done with an underlying tenderness and this was the heart of the film. it's about a recluse who finally finds a reason to leave his house after he finds the need to pursue the pizza delivery girl with buttons on her skin (you'll see). loved loved loved it. so touching and beautiful and true and so... me.
come out. if you don't come out now, you never will..."
it is exactly what i needed today. along with c.d. wright's "stealing away" and nazim hikmet's "beyond the walls" i am reminded that things will be okay. Current Music: marissa nadler - little hells | | Saturday, April 4th, 2009 | | 8:02 pm |
i don't want tomorrow to come. it's such a secret shame to have perfected this ghost walk, extolled it's virtue, and to still, in silence, long not to be alone, to be close, to cradle the small in your unworthy hands.
please don't let the light go out. Current Music: duo505 - facing it | | Monday, March 2nd, 2009 | | 12:08 pm |
DFW
david foster wallace publisher to release posthumous novel 'the pale king'. "The Pale King," excerpted in The New Yorker magazine edition coming out Monday, is set in an Internal Revenue Service office in Illinois in the 1980s.
Wallace's longtime publisher, Little, Brown and Company, will release the novel. Little, Brown said in a statement Sunday that the novel runs "several hundred thousand words and will include notes, outlines, and other material."i'm entirely heartbroken that i somehow managed to miss an earth /james blackshaw show. Current Music: heartless bastards - the mountain | | Wednesday, February 4th, 2009 | | 1:32 pm |
via the incorrigible corvus
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/02/04/ex-masturbator-t-shirts-p_n_163937.html
the first ever masturbating game. every time you see one of these shirts first: point and laugh, second: masturbate twice in honor of not being an ex-masturbator and future sexually dysfunctional human.
the site is down from heavy internet mockery so i'll offer these links instead: it's her pleasure (feminist / women-run sex shop in pdx) or if you're not local: babeland.
and i leave you with the best poem about masturbation ever:
The Ballad of the Lonely Masturbator
The end of the affair is always death.
She’s my workshop. Slippery eye,
out of the tribe of myself my breath
finds you gone. I horrify
those who stand by. I am fed.
At night, alone, I marry the bed.
Finger to finger, now she’s mine.
She’s not too far. She’s my encounter.
I beat her like a bell. I recline
in the bower where you used to mount her.
You borrowed me on the flowered spread.
At night, alone, I marry the bed.
Take for instance this night, my love,
that every single couple puts together
with a joint overturning, beneath, above,
the abundant two on sponge and feather,
kneeling and pushing, head to head.
At night alone, I marry the bed.
I break out of my body this way,
an annoying miracle. Could I
put the dream market on display?
I am spread out. I crucify.
My little plum is what you said.
At night, alone, I marry the bed.
Then my black-eyed rival came.
The lady of water, rising on the beach,
a piano at her fingertips, shame
on her lips and a flute’s speech.
And I was the knock-kneed broom instead.
At night, alone, I marry the bed.
She took you the way a woman takes
a bargain dress off the rack
and I broke the way a stone breaks.
I give back your books and fishing tack.
Today’s paper says that you are wed.
At night, alone, I marry the bed.
The boys and girls are one tonight.
They unbutton blouses. They unzip flies.
They take off shoes. They turn off the light.
The glimmering creatures are full of lies.
They are eating each other. They are overfed.
At night, alone, I marry the bed.
Anne Sexton Current Music: blitzen trapper - furr | | Tuesday, January 27th, 2009 | | 12:25 pm |
| | Wednesday, December 31st, 2008 | | 10:40 am |
win the 20 volume OED if your brain doesn't explode trying to think of just one word you love when there are so so many. some day i'll have the OED, some day.
http://www.powells.com/blog/?p=4174
from the Powells.com blog:
What's your favorite word? And why? What, in your opinion, is the strangest, or most useful, or ridiculously specific word in all of the English language?
Don't be shy — tell us the word you can't stop obsessing over, the one you make sure to use at least once in every party conversation, the word that gets stuck in your head like the song lyric you can't quite place but can't stop humming.
Share your word with the world by adding a comment to this post — and you'll be entered to win a FREE OED, shipped straight to your door! Current Music: parts and labor - receivers |
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