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sex,violence, self destruction

26 October
well, i dont know what to say. been kinda in a rough spot lately. really confused about alot of things that i thought i had figured out already. i'm a pretty nice prson though. lots of people seem to like me for some reason. so i guess that must mean something. or maybe they just want in my pants. i get told i am very pretty alot. i dont know. i guess i am. i'm very selfconcious though. i like having lots of fun and laughing. though i think sometimes my smiles and laughs are fake. it still makes me feel better. i dont like being alone. especially at night. i get really depressed. so i am always at my friends. i sleep there alot, or i go home betwwen 3 or 4. but i got to get up at 6 for school, so its real fun.