||[17 Jul 2005|08:13pm]
yesterday i ate shrimp and immediately broke out into hives, so like
i think, oh shit im having a reaction.
mommy brings me to the er today. and guess what.
ive got fucking scarlet fever.
go fucking figure.
somehow i get a fucking primarily defunct disease that killed hundreds of people in the 1800s.
reguardless ive got me some ANTIBIOTICS, which those poor unfortunates did not have so ill be ok.
i leave for florida tomorrow though, so that should be fun. especially with my disease.
oh whatever. ill miss you all
huggies and kisses and vags to all.
extra vaggies for my ashley poo
leave me love& stories for my return.
||[08 Jul 2005|07:51pm]
jess and i are hollywood tanned.
|excuse the rant, i havent slept yet. and am v. upset about bombings
||[07 Jul 2005|07:53am]
i am so completely upset and pissed off at the fucking world right now its bloody unreal.
theres goddamn riots going on in scotland and fucking london was bombed this morning.
merely because people are pissed off about the G8 conference. why the fucking hell
would you protest the fucking fact that we are trying to fucking help
people live life at a higher health standard? the fucking proletariat eco-terrorists are protesting, the rich fat fucking pigs of this country and of europe. they say that they dont want the fucking lion king destroyed by pepsi, while they buy their fucking chanel- their dior. they dont want holes in the ozone, dont want to fuck up natural water ways; while they shallack their heads with hair spray and spritz purfume made with whale parts- while they drain and refill their pools, water their miles of gardens. all this fucking decadent waste while there are children dying in the goddamn dirt, who from the fucking start of their lives had aids. they've never had a fucking chance. and never will because these self righteous sloths, these nobel fucking pigs are too fucking blind with their greed and wealth and the faux causes to see that their causes ARE KILLING PEOPLE. and the fucking APATHY of this country is KILLING PEOPLE. in our own country and everywhere fucking else. you people think you can go fucking watch linkin park and jay z and buy a fucking awareness bracelet and it's all going to be ok. or, you don't even care if its ok. you do it because its envogue; completely unaware that its PEOPLE FUCKING DYING; DYING HORRIBLY out there. not just brad fucking pitt with photo ops with small brown children with hunger bloated bellies and flies on their face. i admire the fucking hell out of brad pitt & everyone else in the one project. i promote the one project, to the fullest extent. so dont think im ragging on that. i am just fucking infuriated at the state of affairs today. do you remember the fucking FIT people were throwing over terry shiavo? one of the most painful ways to die is starvation. your insides end up being deteriorated expelled out of you, putting it eloquently. we had fucking signs everywhere SAVE SHIAVO. her name was on every fucking paper in the nation. do you have any idea how many shiavos there are? what makes her so significant? people on life support are left to die every fucking day by their families, people starve to death everyday, they just DIE every goddamn day- and no one sees it but the people that bury them. no one remembers their names but the ones that loved them; if there was anyone to love them, that is. my heart breaks every fucking day with the thought that that may some day happen to my sister. and i fight it every goddamn day. if everyone could just have or GROW SOME FUCKING COMPASSION, SOME EMPATHY, SYMPATHY, SOME SOCIAL FUCKING AWARENESS, this world would be such a better place. myself included. i worry about my own fucking face and body far too much. instead of hating how i look i should be thinking how lucky i am to be alive and be fully capable of living my life without hitches. we look at small turnovers in our life; breakups, etc as the end of the world. myself included WHOLEY. if i stopped thinking for one minute; whatever minute fucking problem it is in my life is no where NEAR as bad as anything any of those five year old kids have had to deal with. i dont really have a way to end this. but im crying like an idiot, sobbing over people i dont even know. i doubt this is even coherent. i dont think i really care. i havent slept yet because i drank too much coffee last night and justin in the hospital and chuck and i keep fucking fighting over fucking ridiculous fucking things and i just feel like shit.
i think im done now.
||[06 Jul 2005|04:34pm]
chuck's new job envolves bounty hunting in peru.
|if i could be .1 as astounding as ani, i'd die happy
||[06 Jul 2005|10:00am]
coming of age during the plague
of reagan and bush
watching capitalism gun down democracy
it had this funny effect on me
i am cancer
i am HIV
and i'm down at the blue jesus
blue cross hospital
just lookin' up from my pillow
and the mighty multinationals
have monopolized the oxygen
so it's as easy as breathing
for us all to participate
yes they're buying and selling
off shares of air
and you know it's all around you
but it's hard to point and say "there"
so you just sit on your hands
and quietly contemplate
your next bold move
the next thing you're gonna need to prove
what a waste of thumbs that are opposable
to make machines that are disposable
and sell them to seagulls flying in circles
around one big right wing
yes, the left wing was broken long ago
by the slingshot of cointelpro
and now it's so hard to have faith in
especially your next bold move
or the next thing you're gonna need to prove
you want to track each trickle
back to its source
and then scream up the faucet
'til your face is hoarse
cuz you're surrounded by a world's worth
of things you just can't excuse
but you've got the hard cough of a chain smoker
and you're at the arctic circle playing strip poker
and it's getting colder and colder
everytime you lose
so go ahead
make your next bold move
what's the next thing you're gonna need to prove
||[04 Jul 2005|10:04am]
im pretty sure im going to kill myself soon because i hate the xings and fucking tourists are making me want to die and opening everymorning makes me very sad and i swear to fucking god.
if i have to explain the fucking xings catalogue coupon to one more mother fucker who cant speak english and or merely understand THAT YOU CANNOT USE A 15%, A 10% OFF AND A 5$ FREE BOOK AT THE SAME TIME ON A FUCKING $1.99 COLORING BOOK. im serious. and i hate summer reading.
kay so i have to go now. 10:30-6