...the killer in me is the killer in you...

59o

2009-12-11T17:46:38Z

So, information on the new apartment:

IT'S FUCKING HUGE.

We'll be moving in at the beginning of next month (so probably the first week in January - let us know schedules and stuff if you want to help out with that).

Also, we will be having a cleaning party next week so that when they inspect my apartment we won't have to pay for stuff. There will be free pizza. That's right. Free food for everyone who helps clean and free food and booze for everyone who helps move. Good deal, right?

But I understand if no one wants to help clean. I mean. Cleaning isn't very exciting.

584

2009-11-30T19:09:11Z

Okay. So.

Here's the situation.

Autumn and I (and Paul) are going to be moving into a 3-bedroom apartment. Thusly, we need people to help us move.

THERE WILL BE FREE BEER AND PIZZA to all who agree to help (provided by Autumn's parents).

Basically, we need to know people's schedules so that we can set a date. So if you are interested in FREE BEER AND PIZZA, let us know.

OH, AND THERE WILL BE KITTENS.

(and free beer and pizza)

...

(please come help)

54o

2009-08-22T01:26:24Z

Journal is now friends only.

If you would like to be able to read future entries, please comment to this entry. I will then review your qualifications and you may or may not be approved.

445

2008-06-30T20:16:17Z

Food takes too long to make.

Sleep takes too long to ... well, finish, I guess. What I mean is I sleep too much.

Dreams are still too weird for me to deal with.

I have a little while before I'm supposed to do anything, so I'm going to eat and then take some percocet and lay around. I hit the most giant pothole in the world earlier and my back's hurting pretty badly from it. Hopefully the pills won't make me too sick (that's the trend with me ... take a bunch of painkillers and then an hour later throw up) ... but I recently learned that lorazepam is an all-purpose pill that helps with anxiety, nausea, seizures, catatonia and alcohol withdrawal. Who knew?

As far as I can tell, the easiest painkiller on my stomach is pot. Anyway, it should be legal. I hear the government has the best pot. ...That's all.

444

2008-06-28T06:00:29Z

Today I learned:
- One shower is not enough to get the smell of pool off of you. I still smell like chemicals.
- I do like my old writing, but I fear I will never write like that again. Also, it is not inspiring to me.
- Meerkats are still adorable.
- I still cannot make a grilled cheese for the life of me.
- Summer is pretty much the only season during which I can really appreciate music that I haven't listened to before.

Plans:
- Reacquaint myself with folklore, superstitions, myth, etc.
- Try to remember dreams and incorporate them into writing, as long as they won't turn my stuff into bad horror.
- Buy a new tarot deck, because the one I liked to use was destroyed in my room.
- Expand vocabulary.
- Drag the old computer out of the closet and finish the stuff I started a long time ago. I do not care that it is over six years old.
- Figure out how to do something with my hair that doesn't look terrible.

443

2008-06-26T23:23:15Z

You people are useless.

442

2008-06-24T07:15:56Z

It'll be hard to make fun of me for the music that's on this computer NOW. It's been DELETED. Mostly.

I did some much-needed maintenance of what's on my hard drive. It still kind of bothers me to have only one song by an artist, but I guess in some circumstances it's acceptable.

Since it's hard for me to figure out everything that I used to have, I would really appreciate it if some people could comment or send me a list of some bands that I should put on here. I don't have too much music right now -- only 8 gigs!

Hahaha. Hey guys, remember when a computer with 2 GB was AMAZING?

I do. In fact, I still have an under-2 GB tower sitting in my closet. It's the one with all my writing on it. 'Cause, you know ... I might not want to look at it right now, but maybe eventually ...

Anyway! Music suggestions? Please?

441

2008-06-23T22:26:02Z

Spider Solitaire is no longer a metaphor for life.

Now it's The Weakest Link.

Eventually I will have to go to the world's tallest bottle of ketchup. I'm feeling pretty okay these days, but you never know when that's gonna change.

Another note: When I'm taking a final and the professor has previously given us a piece of paper with "all the possible essay questions" on it, I expect those to be the essay questions. Apparently he changed his mind over the weekend. Two essays that I hadn't studied for in detail because I hadn't expected them. Bah.

Edit: I also wanted to say that the PS3 is amazing. I am going to be hiding in Autumn's cupboard so that I can come out when no one's home and stare at it. I have already started on the game Heavenly Sword. AND, I have almost completed the PS2 collection of super awesome fantastic. I finalized a list and unless any new games come out that I want, that will be the end of the buying. While I would kind of like more games, let's be honest ... I don't really NEED any more.

What I do need is a new, bigger, improved box. One that can fit all my games once I get them all back. I will eventually take them all back. This means you, Phil. And Autumn. You can borrow them again when you actually plan on playing them.

44o

2008-06-20T19:43:07Z

I THINK I HAVE NECK CANCER.

OR A BOT FLY.

THE NECK LUMP IS STILL THERE.

439

2008-06-20T07:30:10Z

I have rediscovered my love for the Secret Machines. As I write this, I am downloading their second album (Ten Silver Drops) and their independently released album (September 000). Wikipedia tells me that they have finished a third album to be released soon-ish. Hopefully they will live up to the expectations raised by Now Here is Nowhere.

I really wish they weren't touring with the Stone Temple Pilots. Maybe then tickets would be affordable rather than $58.50.

Either way. They're awesome. I love them. If you haven't listened to them, you should.

Apparently they also did a couple of the songs for Across the Universe, a film which I'm not particularly eager to see.

Also, Laura has synesthesia.

Edit: ALSO, ALSO, I DO NOT HAVE A NECK TUMOR.

Edit Edit: What causes neck lumps? ... It moves around a little when I play with it. It kind of seems like it's resting on top of a tendon. Oh, oh, it's so gross.

438

2008-06-17T16:02:48Z

Percocet and vodka are still nice, but they don't do anything for a tight/cramped/pulled/strained muscle. WHATEVER THE FUCK IT IS.

So, update on my schedule:
I have class until 3:00 pm everyday until the end of this week.
I will begin having class on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 6:00-8:30 pm starting tomorrow.

This means I should be free every night except for those two (and I will probably take Wednesdays to study).

Edit: Class has been changed to 6:30-9:00 pm. Not that big of a difference, just wanted to let people know.

437

2008-06-15T18:23:31Z

I think I might die if I leave the computer.

I'm not sure that I can even stand up without screaming.

Anyone ever pull a thigh muscle? Any suggestions? I use that muscle to stand. And move. I NEED IT TO WORK.

436

2008-06-14T21:44:25Z

Oh, I guess I now have a fourth requirement for spiders:
4. They stay out of my car.

But I guess that's what I get for forgetting that the window is cracked. A giant spiderweb.

The spider has not yet been spotted. Hopefully it got eaten by a squirrel or bird or whatever other small animal was in my car.

... Also, I think I pulled a muscle in my left leg. One of the back/outer side muscles. It hurts so much to move it.

435

2008-06-11T02:20:51Z

I learned today that it is exceedingly difficult to kill spiders without touching them, no matter how much you spray them with oven cleaner or hit them with a broom.

Or maybe I just learned that I fail at life.

Either way, it's spider season, and they're all coming to get me.

I have merely three requirements for spiders:
1. They stay out of my room.
2. They stay out of the doorways.
3. They do not advance on me. By "advance" I mean move deliberately in my direction, wiggle their legs suggestively, and other things of that nature.

Is that so much to ask? I think not.

434

2008-06-10T16:11:59Z

I guess I should be thankful about this, but the only time my back really hurts is right after I wake up.

This means that I am more inclined to stay in bed to try to sleep it off ... which makes it hurt more.

In other news, it's perfect outside (72 and cloudy, yay!). The storm system we got last night was really super-awesome, both because it was pretty intense and because it cooled things down by over twenty degrees. Temperatures around 95 are not normal for early June.

But that doesn't make my back feel any better, really.

433

2008-06-06T16:29:19Z

... ... ...

Ow.

I keep having dreams about you, where everything's cool. When I wake up I know they're not true and that they probably never will be.

I suppose they're more like nightmares, then.

My subconscious is haunting me.

432

2008-06-04T10:59:40Z

Those of you who have ever broken a bone before know what it feels like a few hours afterward -- it's hard to describe. Take out any muscle or skin pain and you just get bone pain, and that's a lot like how nerve pain feels, except it doesn't really let up. Thankfully it isn't quite as intense, either.

Here's to hoping that a) I don't get addicted to percocet and that b) the percocet will continue to work for the six weeks that I'm on it. I'm allowed two a day for six weeks; hopefully that will be more than enough.

Here's a bit about my hospital stay:
1. I think the morphine helped. It's hard to say, I think it may have had some memory-altering effects. Also, they were feeding me lorazepam to keep me relaxed, which probably had a lot to do with it. The memory.
2. During the end of the surgery, they put a drainage tube in your back to keep the blood from pouring everywhere. I guess I accidentally did a little too much movement and ended up almost completely pulling my tube out. This is part of the reason why I was sent home a day early; they couldn't exactly just shove it right back in there without damaging something.
3. They sent me home without me graduating to solid food yet. I almost vomited last night, but I think that was mostly a combination of taking too much percocet and looking at the wound where the drain was when my mom was changing the dressings.
4. Apparently I'm making a really fast recovery. It just hurts like a fucking bitch.

I'm still really disoriented, but I'm hoping that will go away soon.

I'm not allowed to shower for another five days. Ugh.

431

2008-05-28T15:14:18Z

My room is officially clean and somewhat organized. Really, though ... it's difficult to find places to put all the books.

Also, I don't think that there's a way to make my floor not sticky.

Edit: Also, if anyone wants anything specific (as in types of liquor) for the party on Friday, I'm taking requests. There will be vodka, whiskey, and probably two other bottles of something or other. Maybe some wine. That's all.

43o

2008-05-24T17:22:06Z

Apparently I have EXCELLENT cholesterol. With two exclamation points and a smiley face.

But, I have a low WBC (white blood cells). Which is why I tend to get sick.

My TSH (thyroid stimulating hormone) levels are super-low, but not abnormally low, so that's good. That means that I have the ability to gain weight, maybe, if I tried REALLY REALLY hard. But the way my mother explained it to me, that means I'm probably still going to lose weight unless I do something drastic.

There's not enough time to do something drastic.

Surgery countdown: 9 days, 6 hours and 30 minutes ... ish.

7:00 AM, June 2.

...

I'm really hungry.

429

2008-05-15T18:04:50Z

Basilisks, all my friends are basilisks;
Killing people with our stare;
Snakes like you and me!

All we are are basilisks...

428

2008-05-11T23:03:49Z

So, it is confirmed.

Friday, May 30th, I shall be having my party and it will be at Nate's apartment. Let's say it starts around seven-ish for those of you who might have to do some driving to get back home or don't want to stay out too late. Anyone who would like to come is welcome. Bring a friend!**

There will be liquor. And other alcoholic beverages. And snacks and food. Unfortunately, I cannot provide rides for this event.

I wish Chick-Fil-A were open on Sundays. Or that maybe it wasn't Sunday. But it is.

Also, I should get around to charging my phone so that I can take calls. Call me anytime. I usually answer if I hear my phone. Sometimes the phone is elusive, though.

Now I eat. Or scavenge.

** As long as they're cool.

427

2008-05-06T19:56:34Z

I just want it to stop hurting so bad.

426

2008-05-02T17:26:49Z

So the surgery is set for Monday, June 2.

I will be having a pre-surgery party (I was thinking Friday, May 30).

The location has yet to be set, but will in all likelihood be at Nate's.

There will be alcohol. And pizza. Because I like to eat pizza when I'm drunk (or, really, I like to eat most things when I'm drunk). Music will be there. You're probably invited (and those of you who are not invited know who you are ... but I don't know who you are, and that is why you're not invited ... if that makes sense).

Autumn wants me to have a post-surgery party, also. This would be the party where I lay on the couch and have people party around me while I yell things like, "Man, I am so HYDRATED. You don't even know how hydrated I am. I just drank a ton of water. Awesome!" There would be some finger dancing involved, I imagine. But that is probably a party I will not be in the mood to have.

...

I love sauce.

425

2008-04-28T14:38:46Z

Got the nerve conduction study done today. It wasn't as painful as I thought it would be, though my legs are now a little sore. My muscles feel very odd because the electricity made them jump around a bit.

Apparently the reading they got meant that my nerves were in excellent condition. The doctor said something about how the readings were twice as good as anyone else she's ever had to do the test on. This means: no nerve damage. This may also mean no surgery, which means ... well, guys, my health insurance is gone when I turn 22, so you better make sure you make the right decision if you're thinking about whether or not I get the knife.

Also, you better give me some painkillers to tide me over until I can have it done.

I have an appointment with Dr. Furey tomorrow at 3:00, and we'll be going over the results and then discussing the issue some more. Just because my nerves work great doesn't mean that I'm not in pain.

Almost perfect combination of pills: 10mg of vicodin, 1mg lorazepam, no food for the past twelve-ish hours. Weeeee!

424

2008-04-26T23:18:41Z

Mindless Self Indulgence at the Agora on Tuesday. $22 admission seems kind of steep, but what the hell else am I going to spend it on? Food? Ha!

If anyone wants to come, let me know.