and he would gather her leaves.

again and again and again

2006-06-23T01:19:40Z

1itt13t4nk
add it or don't.

__treeandme @ 2006-06-21T12:40:00

2006-06-21T17:43:00Z

for all those who attended the "team insiders" slumber party;;;

BOSTON - It's creamy, it's sweet and it's become a staple of lunch boxes for generations of New England school children.

Now, the beloved Fluffernutter sandwich - the irresistible combination of Marshmallow Fluff and peanut butter, preferably on white bread with a glass of milk handy - finds itself at the center of a sticky political debate.

Sen. Jarrett Barrios was outraged that his son Nathaniel, a third-grader, was given a Fluffernutter sandwich at the King Open School in Cambridge. He said he plans to file legislation that would ban schools from offering the local delicacy more than once a week as the main meal of the day.

The Democrat said that his amendment to a bill on junk food in schools may seem "a little silly" - but that school nutrition is s0erious.

His proposal seemed anything but silly to Rep. Kathi-Anne Reinstein, a Democrat whose district in Revere is near the company that has produced the marshmallow concoction for more than 80 years, Durkee-Mower Inc.

She responded with a proposal to designate the Fluffernutter the "official sandwich of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts."

"I'm going to fight to the death for Fluff," Reinstein said.

An aide to Barrios insisted the senator is not anti-Fluff and even plans to co-sponsor Reinstein's bill, although he still believes schools should cut back on Fluffernutters.

"He loves Fluff as much as the next legislator," aide Colin Durrant said.

Fluff has a long history in Massachusetts. The treat was popularized by H. Allen Durkee and Fred L. Mower, who cooked up the concoction in their kitchen at night and sold it door to door during the day.

Durkee and Mower purchased the recipe for Fluff for $500 from another Massachusetts man, Archibald Query, and also sold it door to door before wartime shortages shut down his operations. Query lived in Somerville, which is part of Barrios' district.

The company didn't immediately return a call for comment Tuesday.

Since its invention, legions of New England kids have grown up on Fluffernutters. Parents have used the sandwich as a food of last resort for finicky eaters, sometimes adding banana slices to complement the protein of the peanut butter.

aside from 'i love you', these are the most honest words my fingers know.

2006-05-28T05:52:06Z

this is the end of the era known as "treeandme". i owe it all to you. this is our farewell. you did this. goodbye to what we are.

this journal is finshed.

this is all for you.
you started this all.
you finished this all.
collectively.

"...but i love you more."

being in a city dubbed
'the big apple'
has only taught me the only two things i have ever been sure of in my life;;;

one. love is real
&
two. nothing lasts forever. ever.

ever.

so she said nothing important

2006-05-22T19:23:07Z

i'm so sleepy.
i need to stop taking tylenol PM post-midnight.
who decided words looked better without the letter "U"?

"green is my favourite colour."
"green is my favorite color."

i'm going to go buy clothes now.
this is a first in a long time.
i want to drink beer all night.
tonight & tomorrow night.
plz.

new you city countdown: 2 days.
sukkas.

__treeandme @ 2006-05-22T00:58:00

2006-05-22T05:59:55Z

i used to be there, too.
we were team love.
january would have been deathly without them.

♥

__treeandme @ 2006-05-21T23:22:00

2006-05-22T04:25:49Z

happy birthday, miss byrd.
i miss you.
& the rest of you.
see you soon.
xox

in other entirely non-related news on my life,
steel reserve kicked my ass last night
& i walked to a gas station HELLA early this morning
& i'm going to nyc in three days
& i got a sweet shirt from work tonight
& shoes with L!GHTN!NG BOLTS!!
& one of my best friends got into a fight with my stepdad.
that's gay.
like your mom.
livejournal is no fun anymore.

she takes off her dress now

2006-05-20T07:42:54Z

if you want to know the truth
i'm not coming back i'm not coming back i'm not coming back to you

i'm going back to the same place that started this whole mess & none of you are going to be there with me.

i am going back to the exact same place that started this entire mess & not a single one of you are going to be with me this time around.

i am going right back to the place that started this whole chain of (chaotic) events, & for the first time in my whole entire twenty years of living, not a single one of the (former & current) pieces of my life & heart are going to be right my side telling me that they are equally as scared as i am, & i don't know if i hate myself or them more because someone, somewhere, was abandoned, & i can't help thinking that it was me, because goddamnit, all of you seem to be doing just fine & dandy with someone by your side, & why the fuck didn't either of them call me back tonight when just hours earlier, i felt oh so honored to have not one but two boys who cared enough about me to say 'i'll call your parents house even if it'll wake them up', even though they were in two entirely different contexts, i still felt lucky enough to have a great boy by my side who likes me & another who is a best friend, but neither called & danny is out with his brother & i can't just help feeling that i have done not one thing, but everything terribly wrong in the last twenty years & seven months & thirteen days & some hours.

last callllllll.

2006-05-17T18:15:39Z

i have a sneaking suspision that despite the blue skies
& a perfect hair day
& the excitement of the events of this week
that something is going terribly wrong.

i might have overestimated this whole thing.
meh.

in other news, carson daly is a terrible late night host.
my stomach hurts.
i will be with danny tomorrow.
& hopefully bucci will attend the festivities of called lunch in midtown
& so will patrick & haley?
& i'll be in murfreesboro tonight
& new york next week.
i'm a lady on the mooooooove.

hey, jealousy! i was a song by the ginnnnnn blossommmmmms.

2006-05-17T02:25:12Z

i will be in memphis from noon:thirty-apprx. two:zerozero on thursday.

let's do lunch.
danny is comin' home with me, ladies.

so scandalous

2006-05-16T03:47:08Z

i was going to write an extremely i'm so lonely/woe is meeeeee entry, but read the following before such events could take place & suddenly realized you would all be far more entertained by things of this magnitude & greatness.

When social networking goes stupid
Bragging on MySpace.com leads to arson charges for two teenagers

ROCKVILLE, Md. - Two teenagers were charged with setting fires in suburban Washington after they bragged about the blazes on MySpace.com, authorities said.

The 17-year-old schoolmates were involved in 17 fires in Montgomery County, fire officials said Friday. The teens face 22 charges, including two counts each of first-degree arson and four counts of second-degree arson.

that's the story of.

2006-05-15T18:19:49Z

written july twenty-nineth, two thousand three:
(some diaryland-esque survey-ish thing.)
[x] Danny - He moved to Memphis this summer. A really awesome kid. I know we'll be friends forever because we have gone through so much together. He's always there for me when I need him and I hope he can say the same for me.
[x] Beth - My best friend in the whole wide world. We are not so much alike. I don't know...we "mesh" well. And the corniness that lies between us will conquer over all!
[x] Brandon - So much history. In the end, I guess I'll be best off to just call him one of my dearest friends. I feel bad for the past, but I know no matter what, we will know each other (at cocktail parties in NYC) in the future.
[x] Patrick - AH! This is out of order, but I can't forget Patrick. One of the greatest people in all of Clarksville. I got to dye his hair. I love him to death...and he owes me rollarskates. Because. Thats Patrick.

this isn't my life this isn't my life this isn';t my life this isn't my life this is not my life this isn't my life this isn't my life this isn't my lief this isn't my life this isn't my life this isn't my life this isn't em life this isn't my life this isn'tmy life this isn't my lifr this int'y me life this isn'y my life this sin't my life this isn't my life this isn'y my life thisn't my life this isny my life thisn't my life this isn't my life this isn't my lief this isn'yt my life give me my life back give me my life back give me jymlife back give me my life back give me my life bakcx give me my life =ack five my my life back give me my life back i want my life back i want my life back i want my life back i want my lifge back i want my life back i want my life back i want my life back i dont want this life i dont want this life i dont want this life i dont want this life i dont want this life i dont want this life i dont want this life i dont wnat thid life i dont know what i want anymore i dont know what i want anymore i dont know what i want anymore i dont know what i want anymore i dont know what i want anymore i dont know what i want anymore i dont know i dont know i dont know i dont know i dont know i dont kow i dont know i dont know i dont know i dont know i dont know i dont i dont i dont i dont i dont i donyt ids ontgrgroiegpiue09u45

i have to go get ready for work now.

what could we have done?

2006-05-15T05:41:08Z

tonight i read an old myspace BLOGGGGG about my first real trip to memphis & before i knew what was happening, the taste of orange rubbing alcohol & the smell of the apartment (or lincoln's bathroom) & the humidity of the summer hit me. last summer was so long ago & yet the fragments of it that matter won't ever escape me. i don't rewind time much these days for fear of missing it too heavily, but tonight, i'm okay & so tonight, it feels safe. tonight i felt the heat of david's car & remembered the frequency of modest mouse, mates of state, & saves the day. i remembered the downtown pie in the sky & eating raw dough balls. i remembered lemonade & raspberry vodka. & of course, sara & lauren & david & danny & the other familiar faces.

every summer has been vastly different, & i am almost happy to see this one following suit. bt i'm afraid that no summer will ever be as youthful as that one.

tonight i realized things don't have to stay the same. however, i'm not going to change things simply because i am bored. things change themselves without any help of my own. who am i to change them? what happens, happens.

i'm more excited for autumn than summer.
i'm more excited that i can see two of my best friends in the next two weeks.

i can go to bed tonight without panic! at the disco stuck in my head. for this alone, tonight was an okay night. however, i feel lucky enough to say that tonight was better than just that.

tonight i got off work at seven pm and came home to drink champagne & eat chocolate covered strawberries & watch the gilmore girls marathon with my mom on our twentieth mother's day.

tonight i talked to mary about the things that are part of our constant daily lives & that have always made us feel less than far apart. they are the things that combine our vastly separate lives into two tightly knit lives. tonight i was reminded that friends don't have scheduled meetings.

tonight i talked to chris. we talked about the day as we have nearly everyday since october 1st. we talked about absolutely nothing important & that felt important. i realized i don't need him out of my life in order for us to be okay. i realized we're going to be okay. being friends is okay.

tonight i talked to lex about important things like ~~life, god, family~~, facial piercings. i realized that two people don't need to create defined lines until one day, the defined lines simply appear from their own source: the two people.

tonight. ohhhh tonight. tonight i talked to danny about being back together as dr. ernie phun & lil tank! we talked about the adventures we've been conquering by ourselves & with significant others by our sides & with each other in mind at all times. we talked about the prospect of seeing one another this week.

other than beth, i don't believe i could have talked to another soul who would have reminded me how life can change from nothing to everything & terrible to amazing in one simple second. tonight, i realized how fucking lucky i am. i don't care if seconds, minutes, or hours upon hours happen to fall between the people i love and myself. we'll all be together soon enough.

i cross my heart
& hope to die.

saddest story

2006-05-13T17:33:49Z

this is terrible;;;

Kan. Sheriff Defends Shooting Ostrich

Friday, May 12, 2006
COLBY, Kan. - A western Kansas sheriff is defending his decision to order a deputy to kill an ostrich that had wandered onto Interstate 70 near Colby, despite protests from a truck driver who called the shooting "inhumane and senseless."

Thomas County Sheriff Mike Baughn said he ordered a deputy to shoot the 6-foot-tall exotic bird Thursday morning because it presented a hazard to passing motorists.

"It's like anything else on I-70," he said. "Once you take the legs out from under it, it becomes a missile."

Baughn said he doesn't know where it came from because owners rarely register the birds.

He said it's the first ostrich his office has destroyed, although it has killed about 10 emus over the past decade.

What Baughn called a matter of public safety has drawn criticism, though, from a Salina truck driver who witnessed the shooting.

Dennis Espinosa was driving by when he saw the bird spread its wings and the deputy pull the trigger on a 12-gauge shotgun.

"I think the deputy ought to be reprimanded," Espinosa said. "In my opinion, that was not just a chicken or a small bird. It was somebody's big bird."

death&taxes.

2006-05-13T06:05:25Z

this has been a sad, sad week.
so much has happened.
so so so much.
tonight was one of the nights where you cry & wonder the entire time
"am i going to fill this whole room up & swim in my tears, just like alice in wonderland?"

god, i hated that acid-induced movie.
fuck that movie.
& fuck the cheshire cat
& the queen of hearts, too.
meet joe black & m&ms do not make me feel much better.

fuck you.
i miss memphis.
it ain't comin' back.

i miss my kitty.
his mom just had kittens.
one is a fuzzy tabby.
i'm going to name him DOG.
if you can't be god, you might as well be the exact opposite.

you all are starting to feel so much further away.

my baby boy

2006-05-10T05:12:45Z

for those who don't know,
the best cat ever,
god lee (/godly) brunet-gomez-sparks-seay,
died yesterday morning.

this is one of the saddest days of my life.

__treeandme @ 2006-05-09T02:13:00

2006-05-09T07:15:05Z

my (+ danny + david + caleb's) cat, god, is missing. anyone who knows godly knows how sad this is.

i'm pretty much terrified right now.

forget-me-knots

2006-05-08T22:33:54Z

today i saw a teddy bear wrapped in a plastic bag just lying in the middle of a very busy road. i don't understand how someone could be so careless; i still own every one of my stuffed animals. i hope someone gets to him before he turns into stuffing.

i have had a very nervous feeling all day long.
i feel as though something is wrong.
or really right.
either way, it's starting to hurt my stomach which i am not a big fan of.
yes. these are definitely nervous knots and not butterflies.

we ate 60 shrimp in under 5 minutes between 4 people.
team shrimp.

or something.
memphis was inside journeys today.
and patrick and i are tools with our shiney shoes.
and haley thinks our water tastes funny.
she tastes funny.
i can flick bottle tops.

__treeandme @ 2006-05-07T21:27:00

2006-05-08T02:31:12Z

may is.

patrick & haley coming in town tonight.
lex coming in town on thursday.
clarksville is the new hot spot.
work.
beth's birthday.
work.
louisville this weekend.
danny coming back to tennessee.
thus, danny coming here.
murfreesboro.
dates.
and then.
that's right.
new york city for five days.

june is.
the beach.
looking for a new home.
welcome back to my life.
i hope you missed me.

safe & sound.

2006-05-04T23:55:47Z

pie in the sky is the best job anyone could have ever had & that's a fact.

there is just something about tom delonge's voice.

i eat my dinner hours after my family is done
& the dishes have been cleaned.
i eat alone in my computer room while typing things like this.
i don't have an appetite anymore.
it just up & left.

today was pay day.
it was weak.
we got punk goes 90's in, however.
!!!!
way to cover the gin blossoms, oasis, marilyn manson, & bjork.

i keep being tugged in 894798 different directions.
i just want something to anchor me.
plz.

i think we're putting my cat of fourteen years to sleep.
this is something i call chris about.
this is something i don't call chris about.
name dropping beats elusiveness.

i'm twenty years old & i think my mom is about to yell at me.
sw33t.

__treeandme @ 2006-05-03T23:46:00

2006-05-04T04:51:22Z

~~i fucking hate memphis & what it has held.~~
whew. last night was emotional.
it looks like i'll now be watching the final episode of six feet under alone
and my trips to memphis are going to be less
and less
and less
frequent.

all that excluded
i am so happy.
i don't think i can explain how i feel right now,
but i have a distinct feeling that i can copy and paste this entry
several times
throughout the following months.

the beach and
things coming
and relived in cities
and

i can't even start.

if you know,
you know.

the past is just practice.

__treeandme @ 2006-05-02T14:11:00

2006-05-02T19:16:18Z

daniel lee gomez is going to take me to the oscars one day.

mashed potato burritos & fuzzy feelings.

2006-05-01T02:06:44Z

this weekend was amazing & spectacular rolled into one.
this weekend.
oh my god.
i think i am one of the luckiest ladies alive;
i have some of the best friends.
& i think i have figured out a lot about what might come.
& i think everyone is in for a big surprise.
me, especially.

this is going to be a really good summer.
it's going to be mini-roadtrips
& big-roadtrips
& nyc
& working in a tolerable job
& barefeet
& that feeling in my chest
& plans
&.
well.
for lack of better words & in inspiration of seeing steph last night:
big.
thank god for the two towns in tennessee that own the letter m.
yes. yes, thank god.

i miss danny.

! ! ! they ain't EVEN playin'.

2006-04-26T20:09:58Z

thanks to surrealcereal

www.shewee.com.

it's a wonder.

2006-04-26T04:22:04Z

according to diaryland & livejournal,
five years ago today i was dating a girl & yelling at the world for being judgemental. i was fifteen.
four years ago today, i declared i was never going to use capital letters again. i was sixteen.
three years ago today, i went to the taking back sunday show & got a crush on brandon. i was seventeen.
i don't know what i was doing two years ago today because my computer is broken, but i assume it involved jonathan and sara. i was eighteen.
a year ago today, i was packing my dorm to move back home.
today i read this poem for the first time in years & remembered being the age where i didn't think the bad got better & that tunnels were the only place to feel infinite;

"once on a yellow piece of paper with green lines, he wrote a poem
& he called it "chops" because that was the name of his dog
& that's what it was all about
& his teacher gave him an A and a gold star
& his mother hung it on the kitchen door and read it to his aunts
that was the year Father Tracy took all of the kids to the zoo
& he let them sing on the bus
& his little sister was born with tiny toenails and no hair
& his mother and father kissed a lot
& the girl around the corner sent him a Valentine with a row of X's
& he had to ask his father what the X's meant
& his father always tucked him in bed at night
& was always there to do it.

once on a piece of white paper with blue lines he wrote a poem
& he called it "Autumn" because that was the name of the season
& that's what it was all about
& his teacher gave him an A and asked him to write more clearly
& his mother never hung it on the kitchen door because of the new paint
& the kids told him that Father Tracy smoked cigars
& left butts on the pews
& sometimes they would burn holes
that was the year his sister got glasses with thick lenses and black frames
& the girl around the corner laughed when he asked her to go see santa claus
& the kids told him why his mother and father kissed a lot
& his father never tucked him in bed at night
& his father got mad when he cried for him to do it.

once on a paper torn from his notebook he wrote a poem
& he called it "innocence:a question" because that was the question about his girl
& thats what it was all about
& his teacher gave him and A and a strange steady look
& his mother never hung it on the kitchen door because he never showed her
that was the year that Father Tracy died
& he forgot how the end of the Apostle's Creed went
& he caught his sister making out on the back porch
& his mother and father never kissed or even talked
& the girl around the corner wore too much makeup
that made him cough when he kissed her
but he kissed her anyway because that was the thing to do
& at 3 am he tucked himself into bed his father snoring soundly.

that's why on the back of a brown paper bag he tried another poem
& he called it "Absolutly Nothing"
because thats what it was really all about
& he gave himself an A and a slash on each damned wrist
& he hung it on the bathroom door because he didn't think he could make it to the kitchen."

in one year, i want myself to remember that today was a really fucking good day
for no reason at all.
i want to work
& i went to the movies
& i rode in my car with the windows down
& i realized that the people i couldn't let go of
i actually fucking hate.
& i love my friends.

__treeandme @ 2006-04-23T23:38:00

2006-04-24T05:04:21Z

the only time that living at my parent's house is an annoyance is when i have to tip-toe past 9:00 pm for fear of waking up my mom. i want nothing more than to wash off the mystery smell of hot topic, but waking up my mom sounds unpleasant.

i think that if a person has seen 95% of all law and order episodes (sans law and order: CI or trial by jury because those are just terrible), the aforementioned person should AUTOMATICALLY receive full recognition as a policeman/woman.
i want a badge and gun, a.s.a.p.

dial up internet is so 1998.
i am in love with postal service remixes.
a girl with a racoon tail came into work today. so many bizarre people come in there. uh. not that this is some new fact. we got to listen to the faint and mewithoutyou and the spill canvas and the postal service and the spill canvas and panic! off and on.
ugh. making dough beats the hell out of folding shirts.

i'm very disappointed in my summer mix.
it's the kind of mix that people would hear and pick out about five songs they like. then, a year later, they'd listen to it again and find four more songs. then they'd just burn those songs onto a c.d. and throw it aside.
am i the only one who does that?
snob.

plz plz plz. i hope no one spent seconds of their lives reading this. i am just. oh my god i am just so tired of going to bed before midnight every night. i would even settle for filling out a good old-fashion survey right now to avoid exposing these aimless thoughts.

WHAT HAPPENED TO PEOPLE FILLING OUT TERRIBLE SURVEYS?
fuck it. i'm going to shower.