i should be sleeping right now. i still have to get up at about 4 hours or so. i'm really annoyed at my sleeping pattern. i sleep for about 3 hours then i wake up and can't sleep again until much later. like earlier, i slept at 4pm then woke up at around 7 or 8 then tried to sleep at 10 but can't until 11 something. i dozed off for a bit but then woke up at 12:30am. now i'm here. fuck. this sucks! i'm gonna go try to sleep in a few... after i finish downloading.

bumming around is over and i'm scared. i wanna be a forever bum if only i were rich and have the money to sustain all my wants, and sometimes needs. haha... i want to go elsewhere and earn lots of moolah. i was reminded last friday why i badly want to get out of this country. alam ko masama na kung masama pero it's the way i feel. i was so pissed at the time din kaya ganun. kainis kasi yung commute, yung mga tao, yung putik, yung squaters area at lahat lahat na! kelangan ko dumaan sa maputik na squaters area bago makasakay mg mrt. pagdating sa mrt ang haba ng pila, ang tagal dumating nung tren at siksikan sa loob. bwiset pa pag bababa ka na kasi tinutulak ka nga mga gustong pumasok. kelangan mo makipag-away. napasigaw tuloy ako ng "pota!" habang nakikipagtulakan palabas. nabwiset din ako sa mga nagte-take advantage sa mga puddle. yung tipong lalagyan nila ng bato or kahoy or something tapos kelangan mo magbayad para makadaan. bwiset! ano ba namang klase yan. lahat nalang! lahat nalang! X-( haaay... pero sige na, oo na. ganyan talaga eh. magagawa mo. napapabuntong hininga nalang ako pagtapos mapika.

ayon tapos masaya ang uminom at mahilo. gusto ko maranasan yung masusuka ka na sa sobrang toma tapos magpa-pass out ka sa banyo. kahet one time lang. sige na...