a deeper understanding.

I definitely just ordered a pleather wallet that looks like it made of bacon.


having money makes you buy stupid shit.

next are the bacon placemats and the steak shower curtain.
possibly some corn dog air fresheners for the car.

No one ever reads this shit anymore.


whatever.

maybe it's because I'm happy for once and not complaining about something


It's strange feeling this content.

Working two jobs is hard, driving as much as I do is even harder... but falling asleep next to someone who makes me feel amazing is worth every mile I have to drive to get that.

Im surprised mostly by the fact that the excitement hasn't worn off yet. We have routine, we are comfortable as we could ever be around each other, but I still get ecstatic when I get to be around him.
It's strange, feeling this good.


In other news, when I went to Kurt Halseys new gallery this past week, I bought a new print, and he drew a sketch of Penny on it, when we were talking about our cats that have left us this past year (r.i.p. kittiesss). I am seriously in love with the fact that even though shes gone, I now have something even more profound to remember her by.

I've also been going to the gym for the past few weeks, as many times a week as I can go, and I quit smoking. I feel like my body should feel strong, and flexible, and clean. Not sluggish and weak like it has for the past year or so. I dont even care if I lose weight, I just want to feel healthy.

Spumoni ice cream
small group
cookie fight
wii sports
...amazing night

www i  miss livejournal.... i think ima get back in touch with my real side.... myspace is way too much about image.
any of you kids still around???


:) Ashley Reetz-Ortman misses the good ol days.

I have a pimple on my cheek that will not go away and hurts like a SOB. I very rarely get blemishes due to my ethnic back round. Being half irish and italian, I was blessed with good skin. But every once in a blue moon one one of these suckers will pop up and bug the hell out of me.

Anyone have any tips that can help me get rid of this beast?

( more. )

doug in ten days &four weeks from today i'm outta here.

rachel and i started painting our apartment yesterday it looks soooooo cute
i cant wait until we can actually move in
ill post pictures of everything later

To make a mountain of a tiny hill, is just something that cant be done.
...and I thought it could be.

I wont wait around for the gods to arrive.

because just beyond the hills are the mountains.

I quit my job and two days later I was asked to go to Los Angeles to record. Today, I was told by someone I revere that "Nothing is Coincidence," while he stared at me in the eye.

A montage of the two of us. some recycled footy some new.

i love you so much, i wish you'd just give me another chance.

...looks amish to the max.

Sitting at lauren's watching camp rock!

instead of going to the gym i've been coming home with hopes that the guy who runs the pizza place near my house will call and see if he can come by and look at my car and decide that yes, he'd love to buy it from me for $500. those are only half hopes cause they're less than half realistic. really i just dont want to be going to the gym. i'd much rather just lose weight by not consuming very many calories than consume them and then go burn them off. at least i can say i've been taking my turtles out to enjoy sun. i recorded some video with my cell phone of them cruising around in the grass but i'm really not bothered enough to figure out how to get said videos from my phone to my lj.
every time i turn on my computer i immediately go to youtube to watch wall e trailers. then i go to www.icanhascheezburger.com.

i've been listening to broadway calls, jimmy eat world and the new offspring quite a bit lately.
i have about 3 different self help books i want to get through.
saving up $1k for tuition by august 8 seems impossible. i currently have $100. technically i still owe my mom $400 from spring 08 tuition. but my brother (and my nieces part time) just moved back in with my mom so i dont feel too bad for being a mooch. at least my brother mooches more.

cody daisy jj and i after mini golf

here goes try 2.

Chicago, let me come home!

It's about to be 4AM. I'm trying to break my insomnia and get my circadian rhythm in place. A friend suggest staying up until 12 midnight tommorow, and I suppose thats what i'm going to do.

I'm not sure why i'm going into this topic, but I guess I have nothing better to do at this time. Sometime during the summer I became addicted to my fathers painkillers. He basically takes them for this immense pain that overcomes him. Before anyone reading this starts to judge me, i'd like to start off by saying i've stopped, and I also understand what I did was wrong. The problem in getting addicted is most people don't admit that what they did was wrong. I feel guilty taking my dads painkillers because he's the only that needs them. I started taking them at first because I was in pain. I had a pain in my throat so bad that I was in pain every second of the day, every minute. I couldn't even sleep from the pain. So I took it.

After a while, it kind of stuck to continue taking them and it just sort of became a habit. I broke it though, the habit was short lived. My current problem is just my severe insomnia. Later today I have to pick up a magazine that my work was published in. I'm gonna come in with racoon eyes. How fitting.


I have a whole day ahead of me, I don't feel i'm gonna make it. If I go to sleep now, i'll mess it up.

good byes were said, a flight was canceled, and now good byes were taken back.

unfortunately this is not all the pros it should/could be. I now will be missing orientation tomorow, unless by some grace of God, i can convince them to let me show up super late just to register... well see how that goes...

i'm slightly frustrated to say the least...