DirtyLittleSecrets.net

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2007-01-07T20:44:06Z

I'm going to start using my tousledelegance livejournal account again. Please feel free to add it to your friends list. I'll be deleting this username when I get everything switched over to TE. Thanks!

HURRAH!

2005-10-27T19:11:03Z

My members site is now open to signups!
It's only $12/mo to join and the bonus is that you get access to at least 7 other hot sites within the network as well (with more girls being added in the weeks to come).
I have several videos up already and just over a hundred photos posted. That's not a bad start, really, considering I had to waste a week working on my pc registry (it was waaay b0rked), reformating, and swapping hard drives. I'll be adding more videos and photos tonight and more again on Monday evening. From that point on, there will be vid/pic updates at least 3 times a week, often more frequently. (With the cooler weather, I'll be spending more time inside.) I'll also begin scheduling weekly camchats and members shows once I have some folks to entertain :) I'd truly appreciate the members right now... I won't see any income from the site until I've accumulated $100, so...

I will also be switching my livejournal over to the username KinkyLibrarian in the next day or so, if you wish to add it. I have a corresponding domain name for it too, which I'll play with later. So, the plan? After work... a quick Walmart run, site update, and lj switcheroo. Fun.

Go, Mary!!!!

2005-10-24T22:01:44Z

Mary came home just in time to find her husband, John, in bed with her best friend, Sue.

She took the lamp on the end table and smashed it over his head. With super-human strength borne of rage, she dragged his naked body down the stairs, out the back door, and into the tool shed in the backyard and put his penis in a vice. She then secured it tightly and removed the handle.

As he started to come around, Mary picked up a hacksaw. He quickly realizes that he is in dire straits.

Terrified, he screams, "Stop! Please stop! You're not going to cut it off, are you?"

Mary, with a gleam of revenge in her eye, put the saw in her husband's hand and says, "No. I'm just going to set the shed on fire. You do whatever you have to."

Low Carb Reviews

2005-10-18T17:39:21Z

After watching a story on Dateline about how much low carb food products have improved in taste over the years [as their popularity has increased], I thought I'd try some. The grocery store where I shop has had a lot of the normally pricey items on sale, so it was perfect timing.
I'm already a big fan of things sweetened with Splenda, so I picked up an assortment of such beverages. All of which were good, as expected. For $1.29, I got some peanut butter made by Skippy. Excellent, even without all the sugar! It tastes more flavourful, honestly... more peanutty than the regulars. I noticed peanut butter is actually rather expensive... some brands are almost four bucks a jar. Yikes.
On to Blue Bunny smoothies. YES!!! These are creamy and thick, like I prefer mine. (Shuddup, perv.) They don't wreak of artificial taste, which was my worry. Drawback? I've only seen 2 flavours. More, gimmie more! I had Strawberry. Mango something or other is the second I saw. Definetely will purchase again. Awesome for breakfast.
I really debated about getting the Pria snack bars. I'm sick of seeing the damn commercials. But at buy one get one free, I didn't have much to lose. Not bad at all. They aren't as rich as a candy bar, but they don't taste like dirt (as I feared). The chocolate doesn't taste 'fake' or chalky and it satisfies my sweet tooth. I had carmel nut brownie and cookies-n-carmel. Provided the price is right, I'd chose them again.
So far, so good. Next on the list? South Beach Diet frozen dinners. (Remember, I don't cook, so...) You know, it really bums me out that eating healthier is usually more costly. After reading The Fat Girls Guide To Life by Wendy Shanker (an amazing book for women of ANY size - it will absolutely boost your self esteem), I too believe there's a conspiracy at work... Like so much in the world, it revolves around money. Hmph.

Get Offa My Cloud

2005-10-17T19:40:13Z

Today started off el-crapo, as to be expected on a Monday. I'm either catching a cold, or my allergies are kicking my ass. I took some meds and started on my new workload... entering all the orders manually each day: applicants name, social security number, and what reports were ordered. At last count there were 1923 to do for today so far... unless anyone orders anything else (which of course, they will). That's enough to make even Ned Flanders grumpy. Another nail in my coffin... I got bad news from maintenance- all the storage units are full. I can't move any boxes out of view. I can't put my bed where it needs to be located. I can't get rid of my couch. I can't buy my new recliner. I can't hang art/posters or curtains. Asdfghjkl!!!
I engaged in a little retail therapy at the drugstore on my lunch break... things I actually need- nothing major. I ate my lunch of Spaghettios, Vitamin Water and oatmeal raisin clusters, slathered on some Burt Bees lip balm nd started fretting about my hair appointment. I got it cut yesterday. It is kind of boring, but sleek. Tonight comes the colour. My colourist is fantastic, really, but she's also creative and full of ideas which sucks when I have something very particular in mind (and I do) and even bring pictures and diagrams (yes, I'm that anal) for her to go by. I know I won't walk out hating anything she does, but it probably won't be what I asked for either :\ If it weren't for the salon using Kadus products, I might consider going elsewhere, but that brand is so fucking amazing... like crack, try it once and you're hooked, ha! I've definitely decided I want to enroll in their program, no doubt about it.
I'm kind of stressing about my site too. It went live sooner than I'd anticipated so that it could be approved for credit card processing, which takes about 7 days for verification. (I was actually expecting to launch it late this week and go from there.) So, I've been a busy bee uploading photos and videos. Photos can only be uploaded one at a time and you must chose 2 catagories for each snapshot, where to place the watermark, and whether it is a webcam or digicam image. So, yeah, it's slow going. The vids take an awfully long time too since they are such large files. Top priority: I have to change my cam image url for every portal I'm on, and update my vote links, all of which is time consuming, but vital if I don't want to get booted... assuming I haven't already, hmm. Oh, in all my file sifting, I found the password for my KinkyLibrarian journal, so I'll probably switch to it eventually. I'll let ya know when I do.
The day brightener was the package from Carter with the first seasons of La Femme Nikita AND Dead Like Me on dvd! Holy hell, thanks <3! That will keep me amused for a long time! After a long day, it takes a while for my brain to wind down. Curling up in bed watching these will definitely help me relax.
If I just keep reminding myself I have a free weekend coming up so I can have equal time for chilling and webcrap, I'll feel much better. I'm well aware that I'd be bitching just as much if I didn't have anything to do ;) *shuts up*

NEWS!

2005-10-13T20:30:46Z

I am opening a members site. Before you groan and call me a sellout or another gold-digging camwhore, please take a moment to read my thoughts on the subject...
I've been camming for almost four years. Sometimes you get burnt out, but you don't really want to leave the scene - ultimately, you love it and know you'd miss it. So, instead, you branch out, you try something new. (In fact, I actually started out as a blogger, then progressed to adding a webcam.) I've always wanted to offer more interaction and more content, but on my budget, I can't do it alone. That wish has come true thanks to the network of sites I have joined. The nominal membership fee allows me to provide more to you by covering my operating costs. It is more reasonable than most adult websites, and you'll get more than just me :) (I had free hosting, but I was raping my friends bandwidth at 40gig a month and hogging space with avi files and mp3s. I felt bad that I couldn't offer him anything in return, especially when I hear he's strapped right now.)
I still consider camming a hobby for me because... My goal isn't to live off of running a website. I'm employed full time. I pay my bills. I can [usually] take care of myself. In the event of an emergency though, well, I'd really be fucked- I can't pretend that doesn't worry me.
I've been living hand to mouth, paycheck to paycheck for a long time now. A lot of people are, I know. (I retain my current job because, honestly, I need the medical insurance. I'm sort of locked into that.) For the most part, I am okay with my circumstances, but I also realize it doesn't have to be that way. I don't feel comfortable asking for tips and gifts, consequently, I rarely get them (I understand that the economy and the fact that the cam community is oversaturated are probably also contributing factors). I can't tell you how nice it would be to have my time and effort produce a little bit of spending cash here and there. In truth, that money ends up going back into the site in the form of lingerie/costumes, props, lighting, software, and computer equipment anyway. It is like an investment... one from which I happen to get a great deal of enjoyment.
My reasons for camming haven't changed. You'll still get something for nothing. I will continue to blog, tag and update my webcam as I have previously. I've met some wonderful friends that way.
Camming is still a fascinating social and psychological learning experience for me. I still feel it makes me see myself more objectively, as well as spices up my sex life. My philosophy on camming hasn't changed either. I have too strong of a conscience to scam people, and I genuinely want to bring a smile to people's faces. The bottom line is that it would mean a lot to me to have a mutually gratifying exchange between me and my viewers and this is the best avenue. Most of the changes, if not all of them, will be positive... (extensive picture galleries, hot videos, weekly chats, DLS merchandise, and for the very first time- private shows... just to name a few). I am excited about this. I hope you are too. But, remember, I am my staunchest critic. To the others I say: I don't demand you be supportive of my decision and I am truly sorry if you don't agree with it. I can only do so much to please you and yet still be happy myself.
I am defintely motivated. I've got someone wrapping up the php end of things and making banners for me. Then, I will tweak my design, upload all of my pictures and videos, and begin accepting sign ups. If I am on your portal, look for me to notify you of the image url changes soon. It may take a few days, but we're working on it. Maybe I'll see you when I get there :)

Contact Info

2005-10-13T15:10:28Z

My site and email are temporarily down as some changes are made. No worries!
Thanks!

Thx<3

2005-10-12T15:04:55Z

Thanks for all the birthday wishes! :D
It started out as a good day, but later... when my parents called... they are both sick right now, and since they're getting up there in their years, I worry about them. (I know I will lose my mind when I lose them.) They sound terrible, and worse, they sound really lonely- which makes me feel very guilty.
They called again while my brother was visiting them, and passed the phone to him. I'm still mad at him for not taking my calls or answering my messages to help me move like he promised he would. He's the most irresponsible, unreliable person I have ever encountered. (But, *sigh* he's my brother and that's just how he is... Shame on me; I should know better by now than to take his word for anything.) So, we're catching up, he's trying to pawn off some of his stored goods to me as a birthday present, I'm inviting him out to celebrate my birthday, and he falls asleep on the phone. I quickly figured out what happened when he stopped answering me and I heard him snoring. You'd better believe I'm insulted... and hurt. He didn't call back to apologize. My parents didn't either.
That incident alone pretty much ruined my day. And I didn't want to talk to him in the first place, argh! Consequently, I'm not feeling well today. I'm tired mentally and physically. I know I've got to get together some pictures for banners (I haven't forgotten). Right now, I just want to sleep- for days. I would, if I could.

I won't subject you to a subject.

2005-10-10T17:01:06Z

My apartment still smells like Spring because of the 'crisp breeze' scented airfreshner, but I think Autumn has officially arrived. I had to unpack my coats and sweaters, and they've turned on the steam heat in my building. I'm rather thankful to not have the ac jacking up my electric bill for a while. I like being able to open the windows for a bit in the evening too. In fact, I think they are open more in the winter months than any other time of year! I can be as naked as I want without getting cold >:)
I walked into a Spooktacular office this morning! The boss came in over the weekend and went wild with the halloween decor... witches, cauldrons, spiders, cobwebs, bats, rats, banshees, skulls, pumpkins, pirates... It really looks fabulous. He has a flair for this. There are all sorts of hidden things around the office. I can't wait to see the faces of people who come in :)
I should send out a My Space invite... Stockwell Road (one of my fella's bands) is playing at Birdy's tomorrow, which is my birthday. I'll be 28. I certainly don't look it, thanks to staying out of the sun, taking vitamins, and using quality products on my skin. I only feel old when I see all these late 80's DOBs of people getting their first apartments, then I think I'm almost 30... it isn't depressing, it's just... wow.
It is shaping up to be a nice birthday what with the perfect sheets from Hobbes <333 and Thee Boyfriend gave me some soft pink pillows and lovely matching sheer curtains. My glasses are supposed to be in tomorrow too. *crosses fingers* Actually, even if they are, I'm going to wait to start wearing them until Sunday/Monday when I get my hair done. I want the new look to be complete ;) I wish my site would be ready to launch then too, but I think it will take a few more days than that to get the coding done. I've done everything but the php. Someone else is taking care of that. Oh well, I'll live!
You might catch me on MSN when I have a few spare moments at work. If I don't answer or if I get offline quickly, it just means I've an application to process, so take no offense.

Photoshop l33t?

2005-10-07T19:44:54Z

It's that time again, time for me to ask for help with webcrap I can't do myself. (My attempts look like something a kindergartner would do, ha!) Once more, it's a graphic. Not a drawing this time, but a banner 469x71, featuring 4 or 5 of my favourite images and my site slogan over it. Just make it look... 'pretty.' Deadline? 1 week.
Any takers? I still can't provide any montary compensation, but I will barter a video of your choice and/or a link to your site, as well as crediting you for your work. Email anastacia@dirtylittlesecrets.net, if interested. Thanks!

random amusement

2005-10-06T18:07:26Z

I just saw an application for a Nasuf Ferati, and I can't stop calling him Nosferatu. Haha, help! =D

Blah, blah, blah...

2005-10-05T17:51:37Z

*Ignore* This entry is mostly encouragement, ideas and a reference point for me me me, so apologies in advance ;)
If I could sew, there would be so many cool things I could make for my apartment. Oh, I can stitch on a button (not properly, but hey, it works) and I know how to thread and use a machine, but I'm not very adept at it... everything I attempt looks, well, there's something just not quite right about it, heh.

The new web project I've alluded to will be launched in the next week or two. I've completed all the necessary paperwork. I'm waiting on a registrar transfer to be processed and then for the dns to resolve before I can do anything further. I have plenty of content ready, but it wouldn't hurt to continue developing more ,eh? I'm stoked about the creative outlet it will provide. I want to fix up my space in time for it. I'd like a visually pleasing backdrop that also reflects my personality. Ha, that sounds like something out of a magazine!
You know, I hadn't realized how much I've changed in the last six years. I'm suddenly girly. Where did that come from? Is my age catching up with me? All my hand-me-downs aren't ME anymore. And, with a move, there's that 'new beginning' feel. I'm a different person. My home should look different too. being surrounded by things I can't related to or embrace with the same passion is probably unhealthy to a degree, lol especially for someone who already has mental issues! Does that makes sense?
I've wanted to redecorate for a while, and I know I've talked about it a lot (sorry. boring.). Something I *needed* always got in the way... like glasses, which should be ready by next Wednesday, if not sooner. I had to return my sheets not too long ago- I really needed back the money I'd spent on them, BUT someone purchased an even better set for my birthday (Thank you so much, Mark! xo), which was a coup- one less thing to worry about.
So... the plan? (Have you noticed I'm a planner. Or is that dreamer? Afterall, I am a Libra.) I like the dark wood in my apartment, but the rooms need some color to offset the heaviness of it. I can't paint the walls, so I have to explore other options...
I've put off the bathroom, since no one really see it or spends much time in there. I'm focusing on the bedroom first. I still have my yellow comforter, now I have my white satin sheets. I found some coloured foam board at Walmart (in salmon pink, sunny yellow, vibrant orange, sky blue and lime green) that I'm going to use to mount my pictures of Frank Lloyd Wright's Falling Water house. The photos are stunning... call me a sap, but I almost cry everytime I look at them because that structure is just so beautiful it hurts.
I'm looking for something to cover my bedroom window panes with... perhaps tissue paper (rice paper, onion paper?) not necessarily to keep the light out, but to soften it and cast a warm glow. Whatever I do, I have to accomodate my AC unit, which sits in the left side. I'll have an overhead fixture in that room, which a bonus. Still, a couple of lamps would look nice. Target is the place to hit.
Oh how I long to divide my rooms further! I'd like to frame the entrance to the bedroom with some sort of swathy sheer drapes/curtains that could be drawn if I wish >:) I'll have to measure to be certain, but the doorway is fairly large and a fabric shower curtain might be a good choice. Installing the hardware to hold it up should be easy. I'm a grade-a jury rigger.
Next: Fuzzy, furry, foofy throw pillows! I also returned the ones I'd originally bought because I needed the cash. They should contrast the bedspread. A matching rug would be super as well!
I've gotta ditch my couch! It hogs space. It's not like I have over guests to sit on it anyway. I'm coveting a rocker/recliner, just for me so I can watch tv and rock away. I can't spend more than forty bucks, so I'm scouring thrift stores for one that isn't putrid.
Flowers! Something orange (tiger lillies?) or yellow. I'll put them on the window sill next to the ugly brown AC. I have a fab vase already.
Finally, waaay on the backburner... a small corner computer desk... something cheap and plain. I like my current one a lot, but its big and better suited to be a writing desk.
Before any of this happens, I have GOT to get all those boxes down to storage. The trouble is, maintenance has to be there to let me in and then to lock up when I'm finished... I don't get home until 6pm, so he's gone. He's a nice guy, so I hope he'll be receptive if I call and ask him to stay late one evening. Otherwise, I''ll have to waste a vacation day. I'd much rather use them to relax though :\ I'll probably need a helper too... some of my junk is heavy or bulky.
Bah, I wish I could knock all this out in a day.... the boxes, the shopping, the decor set up. Not only unrealistic, but impossible. Boo hoo, poor, pitiful me *snort*

Schedule... Website: ??? (Camshow: Mon Oct 10th? OR Thur Oct 13th?) Birthday: Tues Oct 11th. Glasses: By Wed Oct 12th @ latest. Camshow: Payday: Fri Oct 14th. Haircut: Sun Oct 16th. Color/Highlight: Mon Oct 18th.

This Is Great!

2005-10-03T17:46:43Z

"The phone rang as I was sitting down to my anticipated evening meal, and as I answered it I was greeted with " is this William Wagenhoss" not sounding anything like my name, so I said who is calling? The telemarketer said he was with The Rubber band Powered Freezer company or something like that
and then I asked him if he knew William personally and why was he calling this number.
I then said off to the side, "get really good pictures of the body and all the blood" then turned back to the phone and advised the caller that he had entered a murder scene and must stay on the line because we had already traced this call and he would be receiving a summons to appear in the local courthouse to testify in this murder case. I then questioned the caller at great length as to his name, address, phone number at home, at work, who he worked for, how he knew the dead guy and could he prove where he had been about one hour before he made this call.
The telemarketer was getting very concerned and his answers were given in a shaky voice. I then told him we had located his position at his work place and the police were entering the building to take him into custody.
At that point I heard the phone fall and the scurrying of his running away.
My wife asked me as I returned to our table why I had tears streaming down my face and so help me, I couldn't tell her for about fifteen minutes. My meal was cold, but after what I had pulled, it was very enjoyable."

Battle Of The Bands 2005 - Results

2005-09-30T17:05:47Z

Key = Overall Finish / Band Name / Audience Votes / Judges Ranking

1st Place: Stereo Deluxe, 3422 points, (4)

2nd Place: Mantis, 3039 points, (1)

3rd Place: Jenn Cristy, 2548 points, (6)

4th Place: Emerson Rose, 2248 points, (3)

5th Place: Shadeland, 2199 points, (2)

6th Place: The Nancy School, 1966 points, (7)

7th Place: Rebuilt, 918 points, (5)

My votes were (you check your top 3): 1. Nancy School, 2. Stereo Deluxe, 3. Mantis

The Vogue sold out. They were turning people away because they were at capacity. I fervently wish they would start having local bands regularly again, so that news warms the cockles of my heart ;)

On The Smoove Tip

2005-09-29T16:29:38Z

I love trying new things, and I guess I'm always on the lookout for miracle products... especially when it comes to intimate shaving needs. (Do I sound like a commercial yet?) I've found mens shaving supplies are more suited to that, erm, area. I'm guessing it is because their facial hair is coarse and we both are down below also :) When I saw a cream at the drugstore designed for head shaving, I couldn't resisit trying it on my nether regions. A quick glance at the ingredients and I felt safe doing so.
Got it home and broke the seal. (Although a necessity, seals annoy me, especially when there's a second one under the cap that don't discover until you realize nothing is coming out.) The bottle is weird... looks like a sports drink or something.*shrug* I couldn't get the nozzle on the cap to lift, so I just took the whole top off. Whoops, the pressure release caused a little of the cream to fling onto my hand. Eh, no biggie. This stuff is nice and slick. It doesn't take much of it. It is sort of the consistancy of a gel, but not goopy. It eventually foams after sitting on your skin for a while. (I can take or leave foam, personally.) It has a really subtle tingle (not painful, nice actually) while on your skin, then a bit of cooling effect after washing off. That makes me feel fresh and clean.
I've noticed that since I switched from using the Gilette Mach 3 to the Schick Quatro, I've been getting a much closer shave. I think I've sampled every razor on the market, and this one is by far the best yet. Coupled with the quick and easy glide from this cream, I'm impressed. No nicks. No bumps. The only draw back is the price- the cream is 6.99 a bottle. But to its credit, a little goes a long way, so it will last you. Razor blades are damn expensive these days too! But, ultimately, if I'm this smooth, it is worth it. :D

[Edit: I can't remember the name of it. I'll check when I get home and add it in.]

< no subject >

2005-09-29T05:03:46Z

I'm sitting here after my bubblebath, still with a few flecks of glitter here and there, watching the rain streak down the pane and listening to it beat against the window. Despite the wine, I'm still too keyed up to sleep. Tomorrow is like the beginning of the weekend for me. I'm going to the Battle Of The Bands finals. I took Friday off so I could stay out late enough to catch Nancy School. I hope playing at 1am doesn't negatively impact the outcome for them. (I've gotta praise whomever decided to announce the time slots prior to the show though.) The singer is such a fucking great guy- one of the only friends I had in college. I'm so glad we connected again after all these years.
So, yeah, I've already decided how I'll cast my ballot... 1 - Nancy School, 2 - Stereo Deluxe (they really blew me away when I finally got around to seeing them... pleasant surprise), 3 - Mantis. I'm not drinking, even though I could just stagger home at any time since it's right next door. I have an eye exam the next day. Rolling in with bloodshot eyes would probably be a bad idea, heh. Btw, THANK YOU to those who've helped out with my glasses. They're going to be the best birthday present ever! You know I'm uncomfortable asking for things, so I wouldn't have mentioned it at all unless I really needed a helping hand (and I still feel weird about it :P). I truly appreciate every single, solitary cent (and so do my eyes *g*).
Still. not. tired. What to do? If I start coding at this hour, I'll get so involved that I'll stay up all night. I'm about to turn 28, you know, so I'm too old for that shit ;)
Oooh, I'll read for a while! I can't seem to get into this book, so it should put me to sleep soon.

Meandering post

2005-09-28T17:49:05Z

I just heard the news that House Majority Leader Tom DeLay was indicted for his campaign finance scandal. I can't help but think that during my short time on earth, I've watched politicians gradually become more and more shady. (I have a feeling there's always been a little bit of that element there, but it seems to be getting worse. I don't know what's causing it... probably several things combined.) Have we come to simply accepting it as commonplace? I totally understand how that would make an eligible voter apathetic about voting, but I also believe it is now even MORE important to make sure you help choose the lesser of the evils for any office. A station I used to work for ran a public service announcement around election time. In it, a man used the "I'm only one person" as his excuse, then a woman, then another person, and another, until there was a stadium sized crowd of voices saying it. It had the desired impact on me. I wondered just how many 'I'm only one person's" could have swayed the results in the last election. For every one, there could be thousands...

Enough of that. On to shallow trivialities! If all goes as planned I'll purchase my new frames Thursday. I decided not to post the photos from Urbane Optical, because the shots we took are of the pairs I decided not to choose, heh. I have an eye exam Friday and I should be able to get the lenses filled in about 2 weeks! It could be 3 until I actually have them in my hands, depending on how long the lens crafters take. Gah, it seems so far off. I'm getting squirmy! :oP I have a hair appointment coming up shortly after that too, so I'll really be getting a new look! I ~~had~~, um ~~have~~, er ~~had~~, uh have such great patience with people, but I can't stand waiting for stuff... maybe that stems from rarely having the means to treat myself to fun things? HA, nice segue to... lyke BUY ME A BIRTHDAY PRESENT roflez, lol, lmao, omg *snort* *snort*!!!11111111
<3 my sarcasm/cynicism. Seriously, you know where to find the link, if you want it. I don't have any plans to celebrate yet... boo to it falling on a Tuesday.

For the first time in literally _years_ I have plans for Halloween though! There's a rockin' show at a kickass divebar right across from my apartment. Score! (The jury's still out on my costume this year though.) If my fella's Ex ruins this night out too, I'm really going to fly off the handle. Wheeew, doggies! Thank < insert deity here > she's coming back from her business trip this weekend. I need some alone time [sans-kid] with my guy. It's been 2 weeks. *snarl*
I finished my Halloween layout. I imagine I'll slap it up Monday, then I can really devote some time to something else. K, back to work. (Sort of.) Here's hoping I closed all my tags properly! xo

Double Entendre Tv

2005-09-27T19:34:04Z

There's a candy called Nips. The juvenile perv in me just has to titter every time I hear a commercial for them. Their latest slogan really gets me going: "Because when you love Nips, it shows." I'm sitting here grinning. I can't help but picture what a commercial for actual nipples might be like...
- A man is panting and salavating profusely (think of, oh, a bulldog or something with slobbery jowls) at a woman's breasts. His eyes are popping out of his head like a cartoon character. She could be passing by on the street, in the park, in the grocery store, or he's plopped down in front of his computer breathless, drooling and bugging away at the web.
- Focus on a braless woman in a thin white tshirt. *water splashes her* Zoom in on her wet, stiff nipples. She twists her hair, bites her lip and giggles coyly.
I'm no marketing whiz, I know, but this imagery made my day go a little faster.

Almost Bespectacled.

2005-09-26T15:50:17Z

Some girls can never have enough pairs of shoes. Me? I can never have enough pairs of spectacles. I have six with prescription lenses and 3 plain clear plastic. When people ask me if I collect anything, I say glasses. (They usually think I mean shot glasses, heh.)
I've been getting cards in the mail urging me to get an eye exam. It has been about 3 or 4 years since my last- ACK! It is terribly important for me to keep up with it because Glaucoma runs in my family. My mothers is so bad she can't use drops to treat it anymore. She has a weird, uncomfortable medicated contact lense sort of thing she has to wear. Of course, they are very expensive and she's stopped filling her prescription for them. Consequently, she can hardly see without getting nose to nose with things. I'm almost as bad... I can't read up close or far away without my specs.
So, I've been saving up for new frames (and the required exam). I went to a store downtown (Urbane Optical on Mass Ave) that specializes in funky eyewear. The owner/operator looks like she stepped out of an episode of Ab Fab and there is an adorable poodle that mills about the shop. The place is a four-eyed girls' idea of heaven, let me tell you! I was in there a bit over a half hour trying things on. I finally narrowed it down to five or six frames, all of which seem to be by a British designer (fitting for the Anglophile in me, eh?). My friend snapped a few images with his camera phone. If I get a chance, I'll post them tonight. I know I'll like them so much that when my prescription expires, I'll want to refill the same pair, so it is like an investment, really.
I don't want price to be the deciding factor this time. It always has been :\ I've worn glasses since 3rd grade. My parents would refuse to spend over a certain amount on frames (and there were never any cool ones in their price range... they were all big and clunky) and I was always forced get the most basic lense package. When I got my first job, I gave my parents all of my first two paychecks so I could get some less embarrassing frames. Later, I started buying them in vintage shops and having my parents fill them elsewhere. It turned out to be cheaper than a brand new pair, so they were happy about that.
Now I'm on my own and its all up to me :P I've been skipping meals and paying my electric bills every other month to save up so I can spring for the anti-reflective/anti-glare lenses. I love the way I look in glasses, save the fact that you can't see my eyes and they are the window to the soul, you know ;) Seriously, they say so much about me and it irks me when no one can see them. I usually take my glasses off in photos for that very reason. It would be nice not to feel like I have to do that everytime.
I know, I know... they will be pretty pricey. I'm going to check out 3 more shops before I purchase anything just to be certain I'm getting the best deal. I look at it this way: They will be a functional improvement, and I *really want* them (more than anything I can think of right now and that's saying a lot).

If you've sent a gratuity or are planning to for my birthday (which is in 2 weeks), know that it will be going towards my spectacles and my eyesight is much appreciative :)

I hope to buy the frames this week and have the lenses put in 2 weeks later. Ideally, they'd be ready to wear in mid-October. All this ties in with something else I'm working on... sorry to be so vague. I'm not ready to unveil it just yet, but at the same time, I'm too excited not to make some cryptic mention of it. *EEEE!*

Insurance Money

2005-09-21T21:24:42Z

Mabel recently lost her husband. She had him cremated and brought his ashes home.

Picking up the urn that her dearly departed husband now resided in, Mabel poured his remains out on the counter...

She then started talking to him, and tracing her fingers in the ashes. Mabel said, "You know that fur coat you promised me, Irving, and never got?"

Mabel answered by saying, "Well, I bought it with the insurance money!"

She then said, "Irving, remember that new car you promised me and never got?"

Again, Mabel answered her question by saying, "Well, I bought it with the insurance money!"

Still tracing her finger through her husband's ashes, she said, "Irving, remember that blow job I promised and you never got? Well, here it comes..."

My Mom Always Says...

2005-09-20T15:23:27Z

you learn something new every day, and today is no exception. I have a random bit of trivia. The phrase "mad as a hatter" originated in the 18th century when hat makers used mercury salts to produce fancy felt hats, which led them to develop twitches and tremors that made them appear demented to the casual observer.
The phrase 'Crazy Crackhead' may have been coined when a panhandler outside of The Melody Inn tried to sell me a ladder so he could get some change for the bus to get home. Or not. :)

Full week, full head.

2005-09-19T22:00:47Z

Weekends are supposed to be rejuvenating, but I feel worse after this last one than I did going into it. (Note to self: You're not ignorant. You know not to combine things that are stimulants with things that are depressants. What does it take for you to learn your lesson?) I'm going to completely zone out tonight, so I won't be online. In the next few days I have to look for new glasses, get my shit down to storage (the mess is just about to start affecting my moods, so I know its getting critical because I usually don't give a fuck), pick up some housewares (I have some new ideas), and design 2 websites. I am thinking about wasting a couple of vacation days so I can just bum around all day. I need that. Gotta clear my head.

Commissioned Art?

2005-09-16T15:50:17Z

I'm looking for someone to do 2 or 3 sketches of me for use as a t-shirt design, business cards, and part of a website logo. The medium is your choice, and they don't necessarily have to be in colour. I will provide the artist with a few of my favourite images to work from.
The catch is that I can't offer any monetary compensation, unfortunately. However, I do have things to barter with- videos, custom photo sets... things of that nature. I'll credit the work and also link your website in a prominent position (if you don't have one, I can simply list your contact info instead, if you like). If you might be interested, please email anastacia@dirtylittlesecrets.net, or leave a comment here and I'll get in touch. Thank you!

I've Found This To Be True...

2005-09-15T21:55:58Z

The National Science Foundation announced the following study results on corporate America's recreation preferences:

1. Sport of choice for maintenance level employees: bowling.
2. Sport of choice for front line workers: football.
3. Sport of choice for supervisors: baseball.
4. Sport of choice for middle management: tennis.
5. Sport of choice for corporate officers: golf.

CONCLUSION: The higher you are in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls.

d-o-g-m-a.

2005-09-14T18:43:11Z

Today a Federal Judge ruled it unconstituitional to recite The Pledge Of Allegiance in public schools. I know, it sounds so harmless... except for that one little three letter word. I think back to how uncomfortable it always made me to say it (because I don't believe in God; I felt it somehow wrong, maybe even spiritually detrimental for me to pretend as if I do by uttering such words). I didn't want to misbehave or call attention to myself though. So, I said the pledge, but skipped that phrase and stood silent during it. I got caught and chastised for that. Fair enough. Next time, I simply mouthed the words. This worked for a while until the teacher figured out what I was doing. This time she was a little more firm about how I needed to act like part of the group. The day after, I said "one nation under Goddess and God" instead. No recess for me. I was not a team player and I was disruptive. I had to stay inside and read.
I don't know if things like this happen in other schools, or if it is unique to mine, but can you understand why I might be opposed to it... to being punished for my different beliefs? "Send her to private school," angry parents suggested as if it would cure me of my lack of faith in the lord. But, my parents weren't the sort of people to force religion on me. Had there been a Pagan oriented private school, I'd have gladly gone, if for no other reason than to feel more comfortable, less guilty. From that moment on, I was taunted for being "a devil worshipper." It lasted all the way until high school. People never forgot. They never let it go. No child should be made to feel the way I was- that's basically what I'm saying. If your superior being is that imporant to you and your life, please offer it to your children at home rather than school, because someone else's may be every bit as sacred to them.