you know, the ones with the little balls on the ends...

____fakeit @ 2006-06-21T00:58:00

2006-06-21T07:59:41Z

does anybody read/check this anymore?

____fakeit @ 2006-03-07T19:02:00

2006-03-08T02:15:46Z

OMG PICTURES!!!!!
from my super bday

renaissance fest!

me and cherly and THE PRINCE OF ENGLAND OMG!!
then some fun scottish dancers
then THE TORTUGA TWINS!!! taking pictures of their crotches

pretty hats! we were maidens...fuck yea....haha look at lauren the slut

cheryl owning me after a very "blond" comment about them not having metal in the middle ages....

haha aj my love. let me show him how its done...

VICTORY IS MINE!!!!!!!!

just some sillyness you know
and finally...

my seahorse!!! i got it henna-ed but i think soom itll be my real tattoo!!! but smaller and black. aint he adorable!!

thats all...have a nice day!

____fakeit @ 2005-12-30T16:04:00

2005-12-30T23:05:20Z

wisdom teeth = :(

perkaset = :)

i look like a fat kid

____fakeit @ 2005-10-29T00:32:00

2005-10-29T07:38:52Z

bump.and.grind.bitches
bump.
and.
grind.

____fakeit @ 2005-10-08T19:07:00

2005-10-09T02:18:32Z

i.
can.
not.
WAIT.
for.
college.

sometimes i just wanna get the fuck outta here and start over. you live in one place for too long and you get yourself a reputation...good or bad it doesnt matter, its still there. and the fact is...ive changed, everybodys changed. and i just wanna start over. i cant do that here.

ill be in michigan this week...and hopefully next year, if things go according to plan.

im seeing waiting and its gunna be hilarious

____fakeit @ 2005-09-25T03:34:00

2005-09-25T10:34:51Z

it really is always darkest before dawn

____fakeit @ 2005-09-16T22:27:00

2005-09-17T05:27:42Z

...and the seed has been planted

____fakeit @ 2005-09-12T20:45:00

2005-09-13T03:45:39Z

my orthodontist is dead.
he was old...but he wasnt old, you know?
we carried on the rest of our meal in silence.
it was awkward.
but what is there to say about it?
i had the weirdest dream last night.
jimmy was in it.
so was chris.
we were in flagstaff and we were getting drunk.

my parents are hiding things from me. im positive
my moms oncologist, the one who dealt with all her cancer shit, called and she went running back into her bedroom and closed the door.
last night when my dad called i vaguely heard her say "i have some bad news" as she again ran back to her room.
this morning i overheard, okay i eavesdropped, something about "getting back results" and "knowing for sure."
my dad gave her a huge hug when she left this morning. a hug i havent seen since she was diagnosed, or when her dad had a stroke, or some other tragedy that fate threw her way.

i hate them sometimes but im too afraid to ask. i'd much rather stay suspended in this blissful ignorance

____fakeit @ 2005-08-28T22:30:00

2005-08-29T05:30:58Z

problem
i would feel like im lying if i called myself a christian anymore. for alot of reasons. but, one of my top choices for colleges, pepperdine, scores extra points for religious affiliation.
so...do i play the game and say im a christian, and up my chances for acceptance? or do i tell the truth? whatever that is.

i doubt ill be accepted anyway
i doubt anything in my life will go according to plan
and i doubt i have the motivation and even just the raw talent to get myself where id like to be.

i want to believe the cliches...that you can make your own miracles, that you can be whatever you want to be, that everyone has the capacity to be happy.

i guess im just feeling like my life is really lame. i work, i school, i worry, and i stress. thats pretty much it, and when im not doing any of those, im sleeping.
i need a way to de-stress and have fun. any suggestions? bc seriously, i need help.

____fakeit @ 2005-08-17T14:42:00

2005-08-17T21:45:13Z

i have to write an literary analysis on a poem...
...entirely in questions

will somebody please accompany me to see my artwork at tohono chul park? i have a free ticket?
please!!! i really wanna see...but i dont wanna be lame and go alone
let me know...

back to the essay...
i mean...back to the essay?

____fakeit @ 2005-08-15T21:05:00

2005-08-16T04:30:34Z

i ate so much food tonight...well not really, but it feels like i ate i whale
a big whale
a big blue one

i feel like throwing
in a bulimic-throwing-up kind of way

school is going good
work is going good
in general life is going good
i suppose

INTEGRATION

im watching a show about a woman with a 200 pound tumor
you would think one would see a doctor BEFORE it got that big.
her name is laurie

labor day weekend im going to look at schools in oregon
yeah...oregon

thats all

____fakeit @ 2005-08-08T17:46:00

2005-08-09T00:46:50Z

I MADE COOKIES TODAY AND THEY TASTED AMAZING

I WANT TO GO BACK TO PARIS

WOMEN ON COOKING SHOWS ANNOY ME LIKE NO OTHER

I SUDDENLY LOVE RAISINS

I GOT HIT ON TWICE TODAY...I BLAME THE SHIRT

GUM IS OVERRATED

____fakeit @ 2005-08-06T16:31:00

2005-08-06T23:32:58Z

i hate my school
i hate my school
i hate my school
i hate my school
i hate my school
i hate my school
i hate my school
i hate my school
i hate my school
i hate my school
ironwood can kiss my ass

did you know...?

2005-08-03T10:40:00Z

its 320 in the morning
i cant sleep
why? i keep thinking
why? becuase i set it in my mind to do one task. im not doing anything wrong. in theory everything should be working. right? well for some reason i keep getting the opposite of my desired result.
its kinda like...if someone wanted to lose weight, and they started eating considerably less food, and began to exercise, in theory they would lose weight.
well this is going on a diet and gaining weight because of it.
makes no sense right?
i mean the issue at hand is black and white. ill either get one result or the other. im working toward white but all im getting is black
and im so fucking confused.
i dont know what to do
i want to ask for help
but i dont think i can...and everyone i would go to wouldnt support me or even understand

god it just doesnt make any sense

____fakeit @ 2005-07-23T20:25:00

2005-07-24T03:32:14Z

sorry about that last entry bad day you know?

everyone should read Johnny Got His Gun by Dalton Trumbo
theres not a single comma in the entire book
but thats not
why its
good

ive felt really
lonely lately
but at the same
time, every time im not alone
i get depressed, feeling like im having the same conversations over and over again. something stagnated and i dont know what...maybe it was me

i want a guy
to sing this to me:

the blower's daughter - damien rice

And so it is
Just like you said it would be
Life goes easy on me
Most of the time
And so it is
The shorter story
No love, no glory
No hero in her sky

I can't take my eyes off of you
I can't take my eyes off of you
I can't take my eyes off of you
I can't take my eyes off of you
I can't take my eyes off of you
I can't take my eyes...

download it...its the most beautiful song in the world
but also
the most
depressing...because it will
never
happen to me

____fakeit @ 2005-07-19T14:17:00

2005-07-19T21:19:57Z

you are my sunshine. you remember that song? the way our parents used to sing it to us at bed, making us feel secure and loved?

noone ever sung us the

The other night dear, as I lay sleeping,
I dreamed I held you in my arms,
but when I woke dear, I was mistaken,
and I hung my head and cried.

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine
you make me happy when skies are gray
you'll never know dear, how much I love you,
please don't take my sunshine away.

I'll always love you and make you happy
if you will only say the same
but if you leave me to love another
you'll regret it all some day

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine
you make me happy, when skies are gray,
you'll never know dear, how much I love you,
please don't take my sunshine away.

You told me once dear you really loved me
that no one else could come between
but now you've left me and love another
you have shattered all my dreams.

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine
you make me happy, when skies are gray,
you'll never know dear, how much I love you,
please don't take my sunshine

god thats depressing

____fakeit @ 2005-07-18T17:43:00

2005-07-19T00:55:27Z

hotel rwanda is one of the most depressing and moving movies ive ever seen

i highly recommend it...very poignant

i missed the first payday by 2 days, so i get my first paycheck on wednesday...finally. ive been working like 37 hours a week...i think ill treat myself to a pair of heels or something. maybe a haircut...or a new skirt...yeah, a skirt. that would be nice. as of last tuesday i had 363 dollars before taxes...mmmmm...sweet

ive been thinking alot lately. as consequence, ive been really confused. like really confused.

food is overrated

so is love

____fakeit @ 2005-07-15T04:41:00

2005-07-15T11:42:26Z

well that was awkward

____fakeit @ 2005-07-11T15:03:00

2005-07-11T22:05:58Z

OMG

after a year or so of thought, i know what i want to do with my life

i will be a radiologist

____fakeit @ 2005-07-09T23:20:00

2005-07-10T06:25:43Z

wow...
thinking about the last year has put me in a really crappy mood
and the parents breathing down my neck about college
and my feet fucking hurt from work shoes...i need some of those fun gel inserts

i need some closure
and i need to know for sure if [ ] has any feelings for me
and if so, i need to be scared shitless

____fakeit @ 2005-07-08T20:04:00

2005-07-09T03:05:41Z

ewewew...i was hit on at work today...
me: good morning! what can i get for you?
creepy man: how about a cute blonde with blue eyes? *winks*

i have to open tomorrow
...alone
i dont have a fucking clue what im doing

i need to start applying for college
i dont have a fucking clue where im going...maybe oregon

my sister is in australia

and no swc...for alot of reasons. if you really wanna know ill tell you. otherwise id prefer not to say. thanks.

bye

____fakeit @ 2005-07-01T16:14:00

2005-07-01T23:24:28Z

yeah...thats right. kiki went and joined the workforce. einstein's bros. bagels baby! i worked 6 hours today, 7am to 1pm. tomorrow and sunday - 4am to 1pm...holy shit. itll be a long day, but OMG ITS BAGELS!!! im scheduled for 73 hours from today until next next tuesday. at 6 an hour...you do the math.

plus, im addicted to keva juice

plus, i get my braces off next tuesday!!! finally, its about goddam time!

have a nice day...buy bagels!

____fakeit @ 2005-06-19T23:18:00

2005-06-20T06:27:45Z

i wanna be a supermodel

not that commercial bullshit...but a high-fashion, 100-pound, couture model...yeah, thats the life.

____fakeit @ 2005-06-18T16:45:00

2005-06-18T23:46:50Z

TRUE FRIENDSHIP

Are you tired of all those sissy "friendship" poems that always sound good, but
never actually come close to reality? Well, here is a series of promises that
really speaks to true friendship:

1. When you are sad - I will help get you drunk and plot revenge against the
sorry bastard who made you sad.

2. When you are blue - I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.

3. When you smile - I will know you finally got laid.

4. When you are scared - I will rag on you about it every chance I get.

5. When you are worried - I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse
it could be and to quit whining.

6. When you are confused - I will use little words.

7. When you are sick - Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I
don't want whatever you have.

8. When you fall - I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.

____fakeit @ 2005-06-17T22:53:00

2005-06-18T05:53:51Z

QUESTION!!!!!!

DOES ANYONE HERE DRIVE A TOYOTA??
WOULD YOU LIKE A "MA TOYOTA EST FANTASTIQUE" STICKER??
graphxonline are sweethearts and sent me 2 extras for free!!

let me know...
hell, you dont have to even have a toyota! ill give it to you anyways!!