a movie script ending

Tue, 14 Feb 2006 05:31:11 GMT

february 13th/ 11:30pm

this weekend made me happy. even with everything that happened tonight, thinking about the above makes me really happy. and thinking about talking to matt tonight and the possibility of him visiting makes me happy. and the fact that isaac called me. that too. regardless of everything. i'm somehow happy. and now i'm with rachel listening to cocorosie. i hate cocorosie. but i'm happy. i'm real happy here.

x. liz

Thu, 09 Feb 2006 19:17:09 GMT

february 9th/ 1:16pm

x. liz

Tue, 07 Feb 2006 00:59:36 GMT

february 6th/ 6:56pm

my my, it has been awhile. too many things have been happening, and i would think i want to write them down as to remember. but my mind does not always work that way. the last few weeks have consisted of the sleaze show (at which conor wished me a happy birthday in front of everyone), getting a digital camera as i expected (pictures soon), classes going well, jakes 21st birthday this past saturday. danced with joe, issac and colin. ahh... i don't even know. i couldn't ask for anything better, and lately i've just been thinking about how fucking lucky i am to be at MCAD and studying to be something great.

"the bees knees, like the boss of the applesauce" - will

"the mario bros were stoned.. i mean all the mushrooms, and jumping high!" - sean

"what? huh? i been sleepin! i been sleepin on the queen!" - colin

x. liz

Fri, 27 Jan 2006 09:52:58 GMT

january 27th/ 3:46am

clockwise starting from the furthest left: steve. tristan. dave. jordan. kevin. me. tony. britni. drew.

today was my birthday! lots of facebook messages from people i haven't heard from in awhile. a vase containing 13 white roses from jordan. a cake from hillary. cigarettes from tony. a sketchbook from jordan and britni. and still more things from my family. it was a good day. i finished most of my homework, so i don't really have anything due till next friday. basically i rule. tonight me tony hillary and jordan went to perkins. i suppose it is as good as i can be. tony and i are fine. awkward only sometimes. it still makes me sad when i see them together. but i can handle being friends. tony and i wouldn't have worked out anyways. i think i just miss having someone around. hill and i are best of friends now. which makes me very very very happy. and i'm very excited to live with her next year. all in all. good week. hopefully topped off with a good weekend. including possible blue house party tomorrow. the sleaze show on saturday. and book binding + dinner with the family on sunday. and hopefully a digital camera will be found somewhere in there.

x. liz (who is now 19)

Fri, 20 Jan 2006 22:38:14 GMT

january 20th/ 4:34pm

last night britni talked about how she had spent the previous night on tony's floor, lying there, talking in the dark to tony and eric. a month ago, i would have been there with her. but now i'm not, and i can't hide the fact i'm jealous that i'm not. i loved it when we hung out. sleeping in the ditch, perkins, going to tony's house for dinner, or just to play with his puppy. i loved those memories more than any i've had in awhile. i just wish it could go back to that. back before everything got weird and awkward.

x. liz

Thu, 19 Jan 2006 22:04:00 GMT

january 19th/ 3:56pm

basically these entries are just for myself now. nobody really reads or comments on them.. but i'm not complaining.
things that have happened in the past week (for me to remember for reasons i haven't figured out yet)

- tony and i still don't talk. we'll be fine. someday. hopefully.
- hillary and i are becoming good friends, which makes me super happy. cause she's great.
- britni is not coming back to school next year. instead she is becoming a dr. needless to say, i'm soooo sad.
- classes are great. i love interactive. the teacher is amazing (piotr szyhalski- look him up). i'll hate figure drawing, and 3d design will be a toss up. so we'll just have to wait and see.
- on a sad note- hoffman's mom died of lung cancer on monday. so so sad. such a wonderful amazing women. known her all my life. however, the family knew she was going to die, so they had time to say goodbye. which is nice to say the least.

for some reason, i know i have more to say but i can't think of it. this is such a lame entry. like i said, soley for me to remember what i was doing and how i was feeling at this time.

x. liz

Sun, 15 Jan 2006 23:04:33 GMT

january 15th/ 5:04pm

everyone is back now. i'm not sad anymore. it's nice to be happy again, and it's even nicer to have everyone around.

x. liz

Mon, 09 Jan 2006 08:39:55 GMT

january 9th/ 2:30am

i'm crying because.. i don't know why i'm crying. for the past month i've just wanted to be here. and now i am here and it's not what i want. i just want to be home on my couch while my mom sits next to me and scratches my back. and we'll go see movies on sunday afternoons, and i have no one to impress cause i'm with my mom. within the past four weeks, the only boy i've ever loved in my entire life gets in a car accident, which by the way kills the drivers of both cars, and then soon after he tells me he never wants to see or talk to me ever again. i try to find solace in the other boy who i care just as much about, only to find that he has completely forgot about me, and doesn't even care to repair the good that we used to have. but i knew that before i even left this place. not only that, but i find out he lies to me, about something as stupid as a fucking snowboard trip. if you didn't want to come, say so. there wasn't any reason to tell a lie. above all, i don't think i ever went out one time throughout all of break that i was actually happy about. the only reason i ever went out was simply because my mom had gone to bed and i didn't want to sit up alone. i hate being alone. being alone is making me cry, and think about things i should of. i guess it's just my flaw. i can't be alone. i need someone to need me. jordan doesn't need me anymore. neither do my friends. and obviously you don't either. i just want to be with my mom and spend the nights on the couch like i did all break. i just want to go back to that. and i'm sorry for crying in front of you. i don't want you to feel guilty about anything. i just wish you hadn't forgot about me. and it makes me physically sick to think about you kissing her.... and not me.

my for what i will say to tony when he asks me about my break, and i begin to cry..

x. liz

Wed, 04 Jan 2006 21:52:27 GMT

january 4th/ 3:43pm

matt (mallen)

new years eve really isn't worth writing about and doesn't deserve it's own entry. i went with kayla to the cities, went to a frat party blah blah blah it wasn't fun and i've had better new years. i'm going back to school in a few days, which will be so very very nice.
i just took a little break and went and had some cereal. it was indeed delicious. i know you were wondering.

but yeah. dave sent me that picture of matt last night. it's how they spent their new years... i like to think it's how matt spends his life now. oh well. thats just me being cynical and jealous and wishing i could be in that picture with him.

no matter what i do, who i fuck/date/kiss... i will never EVER be able to fully and completely get over the feelings i will always have for that kid.

x. liz

Fri, 30 Dec 2005 07:32:36 GMT

december 30th/ 1:27am

will + kyle

snowboarding was more fun than expected. however i am very sore and will continue to be for a few days most likely. i called tony while i was up there, and he seemed completely uninterested in talking to me. so i don't really have much to say about that other than i don't plan on talking to him until we get back and he decides to talk to me first. i will also be returning his sweater and tshirt i stole. you always know it's over when the other person returns your clothes they said they would never give back.

while snowboarding, i saw a boy that looked exactly like matt. to a t. i actually cannot remember exactly what this boy looked like because everytime i think of him i just put matt's face there.

(i really wanted to spend new years eve with tony, as i had said in previous entries) and on a surprising and ironic turn of events, tony has decided to go down to mankato and stay with his friend, and of all people, matt. my matt. the two boys i wanted to see over break will not be hanging out with me, but instead, eachother. i'm not mad... i think it's a little funny. i just hope tony doesn't say anything to matt about charlie.. blah blah blah.. that would not turn out well.

i miss the mcad boys picture above. only one more week.

x. liz

Mon, 26 Dec 2005 22:29:19 GMT

december 26th/ 4:28pm

woke up with this in my mailbox..

you my lovely liz,

are going to find your way back to mcad on like the 5th, and you and i are gon' chill, cause on the 5th all the roomates, kelly, and whitney, are going on a road trip to fargo to see toby's movie premier. so you shoud come back on like the 4th or 5th, and hangggg out with me, we can eat candy, and smoke pot, and make out, kill some old people, start a garden, bake a pie, skydive, punch the wall, and make a movie.

smile real big lovely liz, cause just like you, life is wonderful!

hahahahaaaaaaaaaaaa

oh colin, you really do know how to make my day :)

x. liz

Mon, 26 Dec 2005 10:06:40 GMT

december 26th/ 3:57am

colin
i'm sitting next to the christmas tree, lights still on. wrapped up in blanket while i steal wireless from the neighbors, i miss mcad more than i could have ever possibly imagined. i miss living in the girls apartment. staying up till 5am doing homework. sledding. music videos, michel gondry most of all. i even miss observational drawing, cause i cannot deny that it helped my drawing skills immensly. i miss britni and tony most of all.
i love thinking about the night we fell asleep in a ditch. tony had his arm around me, while mine lay across his stomach. curled up under fleece blankets and layers of sweatshirts. that was perfect.

i'm so alone here in st cloud. there's no point anymore. all i do here is smoke pot, and even then i just miss mcad more. ross and joe called tonight. they went to see a movie here.. i wish they would have called cause i would have gone with. but hearing their voices and the reassurance that we would soon go out for dinner was enough for tonight. colin and hannah called a few hours later.

tomorrow i'm off to go snowboarding up north. pretty reluctantly i might add. tony was suppose to come with, but then decided he needed to see his friend in the marines. so i can't be mad at that. even though i know if tony was coming, i wouldn't be so unwilling to go. i want to go spend new years with him, because truthfully, i do really like him. and i don't really want to kiss anyone else but him when it's midnight. and i also would hate to have him kiss someone else. i'm just jealous like that.

however, i'm back at mcad in a little over a week. so i can't complain too much.

x. liz

Fri, 23 Dec 2005 06:48:22 GMT

december 23rd/ 12:48am

britni called tonight.
it felt sooo good to talk to her.
i miss everyone.

x. liz

Thu, 22 Dec 2005 00:36:28 GMT

december 21st/ 6:26pm

noel and nicole
i just want to go back to mcad so bad. i miss it. i miss things like the above picture happenning every night. i feel so lonely here. i hate feeling excessively lonely. jordan said he never wanted to see me again, which is valid considering how much i've hurt him. but then last night he got in a car accident and the driver's of both cars died, and i think we just realized that we can't end on such a bad note. so i'm going over there tonight. i do want to go, but then again i don't. i just don't want him to think that we will ever be able to get back together.

tony sent me a message this morning, saying he was sorry and wanted to talk. i was really relieved to see that. it made me a feel a whole lot better about things. i'm hoping he'll come up snowboarding with me next week, or at the very least i'll get to go visit him. i haven't sent him a message back yet, just because he made me feel shitty for three days by never calling back.. the very least i can do his make him wait a day.

x. liz

Sat, 17 Dec 2005 20:40:35 GMT

december 17th/ 2:20pm

i ♥♥♥ this girl, effortlessly.

finals are over. the semester is done. i wish i didn't have to leave. i miss everyone already. britni left last night, and i was soooooo sad. i honestly wanted to cry. she's probably my best friend here, and i love her to death. it just sucked to see her leave. it sucked big time.

apparently tony and i are over now. and neglected to tell me. we were fine a week ago, then i gave him space cause he was all cracked out for his finals, so i went over there last night after britni had left. but eric was with a girl, and tony was leaving to go watch a movie with hillary. (this is me being even more sad than i already was). i left in a hurry after that. went and cried over at jordans. and called britni. just talking to her made me feel a lot better.

eventually we went to a party. i was schwasted. kissed noel (what?!). yeah, awkward. gave charlie a hug. joe gave me a big hug and said he really liked the scarf i spent two weeks knitting for him. and also promised me we'd see eachother over break. went to the bathroom with a girl i didn't know. it's always fun to meet people in random situations like that. i told ike i don't want to be an average designer. he said i wouldn't be if i keep working like i do. haha, and then i stumbled around over to jordans and fell down and called britni and talked to her drunk.

and then i woke up this morning amazingly hung over and feeling shitty. threw up a few times, and then decided i wanted to go home. so now i am. i really fucking miss everyone though. a shit ton.

x. liz

Sun, 11 Dec 2005 23:22:12 GMT

december 11th/ 5:20pm

oh my favorite, joe.

i know what you're thinking, and yes- my favorite color is in fact dark olive green!!

x. liz

Fri, 09 Dec 2005 12:14:35 GMT

december 9th/ 6:13am

two finals done. one more to go.
i can't believe i'm still up. i have class tomorrow at 1
not looking forward to that whatsoever.
uggghhhh.

x. liz

Fri, 09 Dec 2005 08:12:04 GMT

december 9th/ 2:10am

i just downed a red bull and devoured some hot n spicy ramen. it's time for more work!
YOU DON'T KNOW FINALS UNTIL YOU'VE EXPERIENCED MCAD FINALS!
one more week though.
i don't want to leave for a month.

x. liz

Tue, 06 Dec 2005 05:08:11 GMT

december 5th/ 11:07pm

x. liz

Sun, 04 Dec 2005 21:32:03 GMT

december 4th/ 3:31pm

x. liz

Sun, 04 Dec 2005 02:17:11 GMT

December 3rd/ 8:13pm

so what's happened the past few days.. hmm. got my finals for classes. one is already done. i'm not to stressed out about it, which is good. they had free oranges in the school all week for some students installation. safe to say i got my vitamin C.

a
the annual art sale was yesterday. shit ton of people in the building. couldn't walk anywhere. all the students put up their best hoping for it to be bought. tony sold all his paintings and a few drawings within 10 minutes of the art sale. he made probably around $1,300. lucky bastard. but yeah.. that's about it.

i probably won't be writing too much over the next week or so. the semester is over in 2 weeks, so i have a lot of loose ends to tie up and what not.

x. liz

Wed, 30 Nov 2005 00:41:01 GMT

november 29th/ 6:38pm

lil rick and aj

jackie, my obs. drawing teacher really liked my work today. she complimented me many times. this never happens.
and now ben and i are going to get some mongolian.
amazing.

x. liz

Tue, 29 Nov 2005 03:56:25 GMT

november 28th/ 9:54pm

didn't go to art history this morning. an 8am class just wasn't agreeing with me. that's alright though, i studied when i woke up and got most of my homework done for the week.. and it's only monday. people always ask me how i get everything done so early, and truthfully, i don't know. i guess i just got really sick of saving everything for the last minute, staying up all night and stressing myself out. i still stay up all night, but that's okay. i don't need sleep.

i'm making quesadillas.. i'm hoping they will be delicious.

x. liz

Mon, 28 Nov 2005 10:02:29 GMT

november 28th/ 4:01am

tony and i drove back to his house in prior lake for no other reason than to play with his beagle, griffon.
and take a bottle of absolut raspberry.
but that's beside the point.

x. liz

Sun, 27 Nov 2005 23:53:58 GMT

november 27th/ 5:52pm

i'm back home in minneapolis. homework is constant now. i was up till 7am last night. slept till 5. not good.
hopefully britni is back when i go over to their apartment. then i must paint all night.
all night.
only three weeks left.

x. liz