Purple squirrel baffles experts.



The nine-year old Indian girl in the picture is the youngest person in the world to become a Microsoft Certified Professional, beating a ten year old Pakistani girl. She's planning now cramming for the Microsoft Certified Systems Engineer Exam.


Plainclothes cops knock on man's door, shoot man's dog three times even though even they admit it wasn't attacking anyone, arrest him for assault (claiming the dying dog as a weapon), all without a warrant. They then euthanized his dying dog even though he explicitly told them not to. They suspected him of drug possession, although all they had to base this on was someone claiming there was a funny chemical smell coming from his home.

Good Samaritan sued for pulling passenger from wreck. The Good Samaritan was afraid that the car would explode, so she yanked the victim out of the car. One way or the other, the victim ended up paralyzed.

236news.com: "Comforter-in-chief" probably doesn't mention faulty intelligence in letters to grieving families. 236 News decides to help America's "Comforter in Chief", President Bush, in his task of writing a personal letter to the families of the 4,000 plus soldiers who were killed in Afghanistan and Iraq. Seriously scathing satire in here.

So what did banks do with all that bailout money? Nobody has even the faintest idea.

The top ten cases of human cannibalism.

A British inventor has come up with instantly adjustable glasses for the world's poorest. They've got a liquid-filled sac in the middle—add more fluid to make the glasses stronger, deflate to weaken them. The no-optician-required glasses rely on the principle that the fatter a lens is, the more powerful it comes, so by pumping in or sucking out fluid, the glasses can be instantly tailored to the right strength. They're so simple to adjust that practically anyone can do it. They cost about $50.

Gizmodo sounds in on how to explain malware to your grandparents with a simple picture.

Early results from largest ever cellphone cancer study are horribly depressing. If the final results mirror the preliminary ones, the world’s three billion cellphone users might want to dial back their talk time. Israeli researchers participating in Interphone found that people who use cellphones regularly are 50 percent more likely than non-users to develop brain tumors. And a joint Interphone analysis from the U.K., Denmark, Norway, Sweden and Finland reported a 40 percent increase in tumor risk in people who use cellphones for more than a decade; the study found no discernable risk for people who have used cellphones for fewer than 10 years. No one yet knows specifically how cellphones could cause cancer. The radiation they emit has too little energy to cause genetic damage, but some scientists believe that it may have indirect effects that cause cells to proliferate uncontrollably. But there’s no consensus on these theories.

UK couple Jason and Jenny Cairns-Lawrence have been on holiday in Mumbai, London and New York just as terrorists have attacked each of those cities, and have survived each occasion. Depending on how you look at it, they are the world's luckiest or unluckiest tourists.

Man decides to melt ice with blowtorch, ends up burning down his house.

Feds launch probe into California plastic surgeon who claimed he was using lipsouction fat from his patients to make biodiesel. He calls it "lipodiesel", has a website of that name, which has since been taken down.

Man arrested for running dentist office in his kitchen.

Another aircraft has skidded off the runway, this time an American Airlines flight at Chicago airport.

Anonymous donor gifts $1 million to 65 people together who lost their apartments in a fire.

A Baptist preacher told the Pontotoc County undersheriff he did not know why he had been molesting two young boys for several months, but it might have something to do with his numerous blood pressure medications.

Alaska Airlines passengers treated to complementary de-icing inside the plane, get sick, but don't get off plane.

Actual headline: Delray Beach man arrested in Stuart, accused of dumping own urine on girlfriend during fight over his mother. Florida.


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ATTENTION! A brief message from your favorite _53:

1. Merry Whatever-you-celebrate-thing, readers :) (It's already Christmas where I live.)

2. What I want for Christmas: MORE READERS! If you like my posts, tell your friends, pass my LJ around.

It's the gift that keeps on giving etc.