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stake me

New journal. [16 May 2005|02:48pm]
[ mood | giddy ]

Moved to new username -- justaprophecy.

2 stakes through the heart | stake me

hellmouth_of_la The world is on fire. [27 Nov 2004|08:37pm]
[ mood | determined ]

Like I was in much of a hurry to get anywhere. Hands in my pockets, I walked alongside Kennedy to her apartment at a casual walking-through-the-mall stride lookin' like a tourist just.. gazin' around. Well, I was expectin' to get my Slayer mojo goin' on tonight but eh, this works. 'sides, it's been awhile since I hung out with Kenn and I was still feelin' that wicked buzz. "So.. um.." I kinda trailed, not really knowin' what to say without soundin' like a complete jackass. ".. how's it been goin'?" Good ol' conversationalist me, huh? Whoo! Go Faith!

My mind couldn't stop from wanderin' back on B an' our brief encounter for some reason. A little snark and a bit of chat.. had to admit, it was a first between me an' her since the whole mess I made way back in Sunny-D. Wasn't quite sure how to take it what with no fists and feet flying all over the place. And fuck, I know I'm makin' progress on makin' up what was lost because she actually accepted the offer on havin' a few drinks with me.. I paused. Dear god it's happened..

Hell froze over.

I sighed, a hand lifting to brush back the dark strands away from my face when we finally were in front of the door that led to Kennedy's pad. So.. check up an' see if we got bats in the bellfry, eh? Whoopdeefuckin'do. Maybe I'd get lucky and some vamp would be waitin' behind the door. The... cracked open door?

"D'ya always leave the door open or is this for special occasions?" I asked without needing answer. My guard was immediately heightened. My best friend was drawn from inside my pocket. Yeah, he was made of wood, but this wasn't for THAT kind of pleasure.

I pushed the door open a little so that I could look inside. The lights were off, of course, so I couldn't see a damn thing. I could hear, though. Something was moving around in there. "Sounds like you got a visitor," I said softly.

This was gonna be fun.

stake me

city_of_angel I don't need to be. [03 Nov 2004|04:55pm]
[ mood | lost ]

The streets were black to me now. Darker than I remember 'em, at least. Both hands clung to the single shoulder strap of the bag on my back. It was the only thing I needed for the minimal shit I counted on to survive, 'specially on the streets of L.A. Yep, I found myself back here yet again. I started feelin' like a ghost on the highway. Nobody knew I was there, yet I just kept wanderin' it back and forth between Sunny-D and L.A. lookin' for somethin' that, deep down, I had a feeling I wasn't gonna find. Belonging places for girls like me just don't exist. Who that girl was I was still tryin' to piece together and figure it out. I got most of it.. but I can't help but feel there's a hole inside me.

I stopped by one of the burning barrels that you could find 'round here most the time just to warm up my hands. The licking flames reminded me of my track record I remembered so far. Each movement the fire made was inconsistent, undecided, and completely unpredictable. Just like me, to date. Couldn't fit in with Soulboy's crew, so I high-tailed it back to Sunny-D. B bit the big one so I hung for a while, then she came back n' shit started getting all weird again. I was shoved to the back burner until I couldn't fit in with B's crew, either. Not t' mention it was like every time I turned around there were whispers 'bout me goin' on behind my back. I'll probably never be trusted by them again. Not that I can blame 'em or anything.. it's just I wish people could feel what it's like to be in Faith's shoes for once.

The scene that happened in Sunny-D came back to me instantly.. with no other than the Big Cheese himself.

Never be like her.Collapse )

So I took to the highway and came back to L.A. Why the fuck? I dunno. It's like the only other place I'm familiar with, y'know? I just didn't know what I was gonna do while I was here. Again. Again, again, again. Seein' a pattern here? I sure as hell do.

"Hey, sweetcheeks! Yer in my fire!" Came some raspy voice from one of the heaps of homeless guys littering the sidewalks.

"Chill it, old man," I fired back, lowering my eyes in a disgruntled manner when I looked at him. "I'm jus' warmin' my hands. That's it. Give me a moment and I'll jet."

"Well c'mon over 'ere an' I can warm yer hands up right nice!" He said and started undoing his pants.

I tweaked my lip and I shook my head with a look of disgust and made the easy decision to move on. When I was right beside him I couldn't help but give him a small kick -- not enough to 'cause real damage, but enough to make him think twice on comin' after me. Only question now was.. well.. where was I goin'? Half of me was tuggin' to go back to Soulboy land and give him news I'm sure he'd love to know, but then there was the other part of me that held on so tight I could not even make a step toward that direction.

So I just walked.. paying no attention to where I was goin'.

stake me

iftomorrow I don't what's worth fighting for or why I have to scream. [02 Nov 2004|05:21pm]
[ mood | annoyed ]

The long white fistwrap tightened around my clenched hand and I glared at the heavy bag hanging from its iron post as though it were challenging me. The silent words it used to taunt me, though, came from voices in my own pretty lil' head. Spike's, Soulboy's, even fuckin' B.. it was like they were all swirlin' into one big circle jerk. "Fuck!" I hissed when I slammed a fist against the hard cushion which turned out to be the same hand I punched the wall with. It fuckin' hurt let me tell you, but it made the whole workout more intense. Pretty fuckin' wicked. The music I had blarin' from the radio sure didn't help the scene.

I began kickin' and punchin' away like there was goin' be no tomorrow for me and that THIS was gonna be the only method I had to get the fustrations out of me. As the workout stretched my mind lingered more, wonderin' exactly where the hell I was going. The look Soulboy gave me when I arrived in the hotel was pasted in my head like a pretty little polaroid and I pushed myself harder.. the moistoned sweat already buildin' all over my form.

Good thing I made a small retreat. Had to have a little time to myself to get my thoughts back together. I was one confused bitch with issues and that's somethin' that won't help everyone kick The First's ass. In fact, I think that's what made 'im get me. Yeah, that was fuckin' it. I gave the bastard that opportunity the moment I saw him wear Woody's face and let the emotions take control over me. I really needed to learn some self control.

I had to get ahold of myself so I stopped to regain my breath, my eyes waverin' over the radio which was now playin' "Easier To Run" by Linkin Park. Hilarious. Half the songs I was able to hear from them basically described my life, the entire mess I'm in. It'd be easier to ditch this joint and head my merry own way.. didn't understand what was stoppin' me. What WAS stopping me?

That's when I saw the amulet. Same one good ol' Willy popped out of.

A sigh left my lips and I shook my head, returnin' back to my workout when I felt the emotions pump through me again. Don't know what the hell was goin' on with that. I guess Spike was right in a way, I didn't know what the hell I wanted. It was nice for once to just be accepted by someone who didn't know much about the messy trails I had behind me... fuck, right now, it was just nice to be with someone period. Yet again, I still feel like I'm livin' within B's shadow. How'm I supposed to know who he was thinkin' of while we were doin' the horizontal mambo?

Did I care if he did or not? I don't know. I still don't like the idea though I'm always second place when it comes to her.. maybe that's what gettin' to me. Yeah, that's it. A breath was takin' in as I realized I was only confusin' myself more. Great.. fuckin'.. dandy. I was one hell of a piece of work.

The wounds upon my fist were beginning to open again but I really didn't give a shit.. I think the pain upon it was the only reminder to me that I was still real.

stake me

sigil_diaboli [06 Sep 2004|07:05pm]
[ mood | bored ]

I took my bag of popcorn and flopped on the bed, takin' the clicker and randomly went through channels. Huh, seems like tonight a bunch of good movies are on -- one of them bein' Dirty Dancing. I turned to the exact channel the movie was on and settled in, popping in a kernal in my mouth here and there. Oh yeah, I can live with this life.

Hell, this has been my life since the shit in Sunny-D went down. Didn't stick 'round long after it -- sure, would've loved a girl night with B in little celebration of the success but I didn't think she was up to it. Things are pretty settled between us I think, but I thought it was best for us just to split our ways. Fine and dandy, I'm sure she wanted the room after the losses that came with the big win. It's pretty funny to think that a vamp saved the world -- I give the guy credit for that. Didn't know him too much -- but he was pretty damn cool when we chatted.

Wonder what the Soulboy thinks about all this?

Soulboy. Haven't seen him since I left L.A., I probably would've paid a visit but he seemed to have his hands full with his new kid. Yeah, I'm pretty cool just chilling around by myself and takin' a small break from the slayin' ordeal.. gives a girl time to relax and think.

Who the hell am I kiddin'?

I miss the huntin', the slayin', the entire gig! There hasn't been much to slay on though with Slayers runnin' around in every corner killing the entire game. Fuck, I get loads of pent up fustration and I think the most I've beat the crap out of was the chair when I stubbed my toe this morning. It's pretty damn sad -- every night I've been spending my time here, in front of this TV.

Think that's why I left the info to the G-man. I even went to the library to e-mail him the scoop on where I was at just in case Soulboy needed the hand if some wicked mojo rose up. They could call me up and say "hey, Faith, there's some annoying vampire outside.. dust it?" -- that's how damn desperate I am right now.

Maybe tonight I'll get some luck. Maybe some stupid demon will feel bored and want to end the world -- there's always one of those runnin' around.

But not until Dirty Dancing is over.

stake me

angel_afterlife [12 Jul 2004|10:28pm]
[ mood | listless ]

After the whole mess in Sunny-D I parted ways from my slayergal B. At this point forward she really didn't need me and by the look on her face she was ready to set off into her "normal" life with little Dawnie. Hey.. whatever works. She has the right to after all these years of doin' nothing but kickin' ass and saving the world.. poor girl needs a break. And what better oppurtunity when there's slayers wakin' up all over the world?

I was happy to take her place though -- I loved my job. Pure and simple. I loved the slayin' and playing hero bit. Even better I was enjoyin' my time alone.. doin' the whole lone slayer thing and makin' a difference from town to town. That was though until I got word of some serious wicked shit going down in the City of Angels.. and moreover, about Soulboy.

Tell you the truth, I didn't know how to take it. I just stood there listless. I wouldn't be where I am today if it wasn't for him.. he was the only person who never lost "faith" in me so to speak. When everyone else turned their back on me (not like I could blame them).. there he was, my knight in shining armor.

I should've frickin' been there. I should've been fighting by his side and dying in the good fight like I always imagined I would.. but here I was takin' my own sweet time thinkin' I was making a difference when honestly I had no fuckin' clue what was really goin' down. Damn it, why wasn't I called?

Walkin' on the streets of L.A. was bringin' a bag filled of nothing but memories. I just couldn't really imagine of him not bein' there.. breathin' the same air I was 'bout now. Hell, I honestly thought he'd live forever. Good guys aren't supposed to die..

Wake up, Faith. This is reality.

Time to clean up the mess though -- the dirty work of this job I really didn't want to do.. especially now. I didn't know whether to grieve or hold on the strong face.

But my thoughts were on someone else.. someone whom I haven't seen in ages. Connor. Did he even know what took place?

I needed a familiar face.. so I headed my way up to the boy's digs.

stake me

iftomorrow [10 Jul 2004|08:15pm]
[ mood | sore ]

My body felt like it hasn't slept in weeks.. literally. I crashed harder than alcoholic driving on a Friday night. With the battle with The First includin' bein' Ms. Little Slayer babysitter for the girls.. heh. Never really got the chance to actually sleep, y'know?

Sleep decided not to come to me though for some reason. I probably laid there for only a couple of hours before I decided to just roll outta bed and get myself cleaned up. I kinda.. well.. dropped off it though. Yeah, I wasn't graceful but I really didn't give a shit. I felt like a limp noodle.. not like I didn't have a reason. Some wicked stuff went down tonight -- and it wasn't just The First's new trick. Talk 'bout gettin' your kinks on.

I took one glance toward Sparky before draggin' myself to the bathroom. Closing the door I turned on the light and looked at myself in the mirror which wasn't the prettiest of sights.. looked like I was tossed 'round a bit.. in the back of a humvee.. loaded with spare tires.

".. well, Faith, was it worth it?" I asked out loud to myself.

Turning on the faucet I soaked my hands and rubbed my face down in hopes to wake me up more. I'd lie if I said I hated it.. and I'd lie if I said I regretted it so what does a gal do? I can understand why she always goes for the fangy boys.. I mean, gotta think of it this way, me an' B.. we were never normal the moment our slayer chords were sung. We're supernatural. And we need some supernatural to keep up with us if we want our darker needs fulfilled. More than likely it'll probably end up all 'hush-hush' though 'cause of Sparky still bein' hung up over B. He really doesn't need the drama that came with this package tonight. Burn it in the fire, I'd say.

I sighed. Whatever.

Y'know what I really needed before I met up with the White Hats? A shower.. my body was seriously itchin' for one. I stepped in it and turned the knob completely faced to sizzlin' hot.. jus' how I like my men. Lettin' the steamy hot water cascade over my body like the hands of a thousand lovers all at once. That was liftin' in itself.

I didn't spend long in the shower, though. Wasting little time I turned the water off and stepped out, not bothering to dry my hair much before wrapping a towel around me and returning to the other room.

... where'd he put those cigarettes?

stake me

iftomorrow [24 Jun 2004|01:43pm]
[ mood | exhausted ]

How fuckin' dumb was I.

Here I thought we were unstoppable. I mean.. c'mon.. B destroyed apocalypses from happenin' a dozen times so why shouldn't this one have been any different? Not only that but we had more slayers then we could count on our side thanks to Red's wicked mojo. Everythin' was lookin' up.. we were fightin' and winnin' and I was high as a kite..

Then Spike got knocked down.

That was it. That's what sealed our fate.. it only took one swift blow to destroy us. I watched him crumble to the ground an' watched a dozen other slayers fall soon after -- they were all droppin' like flies. The moment we all witnessed Spike's death was the moment they lost faith in us. We should've been prepared.. we should've gotten a backup plan.. but it's too late now. We barely survived escapin' and now we're bein' hunted like a bunch of foxes by The First's bloodhounds.

I wonder how B was takin' this defeat.. I wonder how anyone is. The world is now in The First's hands and it's all our fault.

"Hey.." I finally managed to mutter out while watching Angel and B converse between eachother. I didn't want to be here right now.. so all I could do was come up with some lame excuse to slip away. "I'm gonna go clean up."

I didn't even ask. I just walked up to a room upstairs and closed an' locked it. Luckily there was a bed in there and basically all the little essentials I needed. I just didn't want to deal with this right now.. I couldn't even look at B or Angel in the eye. The one time I promised I'd be there to help them win was the one time I failed. Even if I tried to get away from it, I now have that constant reminder of that wicked black cloud that keeps getting bigger and coming closer. I give it a couple of days before sunlight won't be seen at all. Hell, we're wicked lucky to even get some right now.

Damn it, B, I'm so sorry for lettin' you down. Xander.. I can't even imagine how you feel without Anya right now. Red.. jeez, you've done so much and yet you lost Kennedy. Robin.. I'm sorry we were never able to take that chance.

I closed my eyes to collect myself for a second. Wow.. look at me. All these thoughts made me force out a chuckle. Huh. How depressing is this? Here I was the girl that was all five by five an' full of life and now I'm just a scared little kid. Yeah.. I'm fuckin' scared shitless. It's a pretty scary feelin' when you know your life is tickin' itself to it's end.

And to put the fillin' in the cake, we dumped all of this on Soulboy's lap. Dunno where he is in life at the moment but I'm damn sure it wasn't near as bad as it is now. But really, where else could we go? Half of me is hopin' for him to push us away for his own and crew's sake but then there was half that prayed he'd let us stay. The only way we can have a chance is if we fight together against this thing.

If there is even a chance.

I began to take off my jacket when suddenly a rush of pain hit me throughout my body. "OW!" I hissed, forcing myself to throw the jacket to the floor as I stared upon the nasty gash wound on my arm. Heh, one of the things that makes this job easier is definately havin' the healing powers. "What the hell?" I blinked, my eyes taking notice upon the object that fell with my jacket.. the amulet. Don't ask me why I took it -- I just did. Slayer reflex thing. This thing posed a huge threat so obviously I couldn't just leave it there. Leaning down I picked it up and stared at it. I don't blame Spike for this.. Spike died tryin'.. maybe I should give it to B as a keepsake or hide it somewhere.

"Fuck it." I said to myself. With everything goin' on I wasn't going to take anymore chances.. slayer reflexes comes with slayer instincts an' all that shit. Somethin' wicked was ticking in me.. little did I know there was more to this thing than expected.

It had to be destroyed, plain an' simple.

Luckily there was a lonely hammer nearby that I was able to grab and I prepared to do what I had to do..

That was until I saw it glow..

(( Open to Spike ))

stake me

la_champions [23 Jun 2004|12:33pm]
[ mood | hungry ]

Damn, I felt like hell. Maybe for once I had a bit of too much fun -- but fuck, I haven't felt that good in a long time. My mind was a blur though on what happened.. but I remembered the big details. Yeah, details.. one of 'em bein' the key on what's gonna get me to win this war. If I learned anythin' it's safety in numbers as B liked to prove that to me again and again with her 'Scoobies'. I'm not much of a player though.. but for this I'm willin' to suck in my pride.

My eyes turned over toward sleeping peroxide. Gotta say, the guy has fire.. enough of it to keep up with me. It was a blast to watch him wiggle and squirm beneath me as I tortured his body. No wonder B was so strung out with Angel -- vampires really know how to get a girl's engine heated up. If I couldn't do anythin' because of some shitty curse.. yeah, I'd be walkin' and talkin' around like some stick was up my ass. I still didn't get much of that though.. the bad boys are the ones that really get me goin'. I know B has darkness in her -- I've seen it and I watched her rub herself all over it.

She's jealous of me, that's what it is. Jealous that I'm livin' it up to all it's glory an' she isn't because she's afraid of what her little posse will think of her. I'm sorry, no groupie is gonna put a leash 'round me and train me to their liking. I'm a wild animal.

I leaned over to grab what was left of the bottle last night, drinking it completely dry. I'll let him sleep a bit longer.. guy deserves that much. Hope he's not expectin' much outta me because this is what I like to call a "business offer" .. it'll probably keep him from biting me at least until we scratch B an' Angel outta the chalkboard.

Eh, I was feelin' a bit hot too.. he was there, I was there.. we both were drunk. I wouldn't mind goin' for another couple of 'rounds.. he's pretty wicked in bed. But.. who the hell is 'Dru' that he keeps mutterin' about in his sleep though?

Hell.. who cares?

Fuck his sleep. I was hungry.. an' we had a lot to talk 'bout and deals to be made. I brought the blanket to my chest and tossed the empty bottle upon his stomach.

"HEY. I'm orderin' pizza.. what the hell do you want?"

stake me

la_champions [15 Jun 2004|03:59pm]
[ mood | satisfied ]

The bus ride to every other person was not that long, but to me.. seemed like forever an' a day. I was thinking 'bout a lot of things -- 'bout B, the boss, Sunny-D, hell.. even Wes. Couldn't believe where I was and how far I came.. was jus' a normal girl looking for a good time and then I became a slayer which was even better. Next thing I knew I was runnin' away from the cops for bein' a wanted murderer and then enemies with B and her groupies.

It's wicked how life is. I had to admit I didn't know if this hatred was for the Scoobs or for me. Y'know what.. fuck it. The hole is too deep for me to climb out now -- no possible way. I'm 'the slayer gone bad' or whatever they like to call me.. I chose this path an' I'm gonna stick with it. Probably end up dead but I couldn't really care anymore.. I welcomed death. "But not without a fight," I said, my thought seeping through my lips. Brought a few glares toward me but they were quick to turn their attention elsewhere. Smart.

God, all this thinkin' is doing nothin' but fustrating me. Enough of that.

The bus halted and Los Angeles was called upon the header. Okay.. so 'ere I am. City of Angels. I threw my backpack over my shoulder and slowly walked my way out of the vehicle, taking that first step what is gonna be my new home. I'm diggin' the scene.. probably some badass clubs 'round here too.

But first I need some cash.. won't get anywhere without that. And the easiest way to get that is..

"Hey baby," a voice called out to me as I neared an alley. The carrier then approached me from behind, settling his hand upon my shoulder. I turned around to face him only to find myself lookin' upon what seemed like a guy tryin' to dress like a pimp of some sort. The suit looked expensive.. an' the jewelry he wore was obnoxious. It was wicked obvious this guy was carryin' a decent amount of dough. "Going my way?"

A grin was moved upon my lips. "Maybe I am." I answered, my steps slowly leading deeper and deeper into the dark alley. He followed close behind like a lapdog -- making this all too easy for me. I leaned against the wall behind me, waiting for him to approach me again.

"If that's the case.." He placed his hands on both sides of my head and leaned in closer and closer to me. By this time I already managed to pull out the butterfly knife I was able to nab before I left Sunny-D, taking full advantage of the darkness that surrounded us. When his lips finally was finally placed upon mine that's when I made my move..

My hand lifted to take a good grip upon his collar. "Scream for me," I whispered before the blade suddenly reached his lower gut. All he could do was muffle a quiet cry, his wide eyes looking upon me in total shock. With the noise goin' on in the streets and the sirens blazing somewhere else, it was almost impossible for anyone to hear him.

His life was slippin' in my hold as I gave him another stab, feeling his blood seep upon my hand. It looked like he wanted to say somethin' to me but only managed out a final breath before falling completely limp. About time..

I released him to the ground. With the mess that I made, I was lucky only to get some on my hand. Leaning forward I reached into his coat to pull out his wallet -- holy crap this guy was loaded! "Thanks sweetness." I chuckled rather chipperly, examining the cash with my clean hand. I stuffed the money into my pocket and threw the wallet into the dumpster nearby which gave me an idea..

He was pretty heavy but that's why we slayers have 'slayer strength'. I threw him in without even bothering to take a look afterward, closing the door.

Now that I have that taken care of.. it's time to have some fun. I was feelin' pretty five by five an' I wanted a drink. Had to get clean up first, of course.. probably can change and wash up in a public restroom on my way.

L.A. was definately my type of town.

stake me

bigbadsunnyd [15 Jun 2004|03:25pm]
[ mood | uncomfortable ]

(( Thought we could move this into a post since I need to.. ^^ ))

"So where have ya been?" Xander asked me as we began to head toward the Bronze. I hardly paid much attention as I still was a bit irked on whatever was tryin' to tell me that somethin' was different here. Somethin' was wrong..

And it was pointin' with flashy lights right at the Zeppo.

"The slammer," I answered quite bluntly, rolling my eyes a bit, "where else?"

Yeah, I was still ticked on the whole Wes thing and it showed quite clearly. I sighed, lifting my hand as I ran my fingers through the dark strands of my hair. God I was so aggravated. This whole damn thing was causin' me some wicked stress I didn't needed..

I looked over my shoulder every now and then to look at him. He looked a bit pale.. like somethin' just scared him. Better yet, pale like a bloodsucker. Couldn't be though, this is Xander we're talkin' about.. he's probably lookin' a bit on the down side because he's around me.

My steps suddenly stopped as a thought came to mind. I turned around to face him.. "Actually," came a hum from my lips, "been stalkin' 'bout with Wes on this whole new portal thing that opened. Heard anythin'?" Didn't know if he knew anything but he might've from good ol' B. Might melt the ice a bit the next time I talk to Wes..

stake me

sunnydale_90666 [14 Jun 2004|01:23pm]
[ mood | flirty ]

So this is The Bronze.. the famous hangout of Sunny-D. And what's so famous about it I couldn't guess because I've seen loads that are better. Not a bad place though to crash an' forget which is just what I'm plannin' to do.. just gonna score me some vamps in the meantime.

Too bad I hardly know where to start to find this Buf.. whatever her name is. Her name starts with a B so I'll jus' call her B from now on. Much easier for me an' the entire family.

I couldn't help but catch a few glances of onlookers -- either because I'm a stranger in town or I was lookin' wicked good to them I didn't care. I took the oppurtunity to straighten myself and sway my hips onto the dance floor where I began to blow my dancing moves. I found it amusing how half the guys were starin' at me even with their girlfriends staring right at their face.. damn right, ladies, Faith's in town. Better hold onto your boytoy's tightly.

That's when a guy in particular caught my eye. Beefcake all right but his clothin' was way off.. the little slayer vibes were tinglin' for this one to be a vamp. "C'mere dollface," I whispered to him as I took his hand without waiting much for an answer. He didn't seem to deny it so it was all good. Hey.. I was gonna have a little fun before doin' my call of duty. No harm in that.

Besides, his dancing wasn't that bad. A girl's gotta take advantage of that.

stake me

la_champions [14 Jun 2004|11:26am]
[ mood | indescribable ]

It didn't take long before I was in the girl's clothing. I walked out of the hospital like a freebird, not even one person suspectin' me.

Idiots.

So I haven't been out that long.. but enough to get everyone outta my hair. I had a choice: I could persue B an' do the whole 'revenge' thing or just move on to another town which I think that's what I'm gonna do. Don't get me wrong, she's gonna get what's comin' to her from me but I'm just not ready yet. Feelin' a bit out of the loop.. gotta make sure I still have it in me and practice for the next showdown, y'know? I do it now I might as well just be standin' there waiting to lose.

It's so hard though. I'm never the stand down girl.. I'm all 'bout just goin' out there and doing it. I'll do her the way she did me.. a nice stab in the gut and see how she likes it. I'll probably have a little torment fun first because.. if she were to go into a coma, I want her to dream of me the way I did of her. That endless replay of her losing..

To the other slayer.

What's up with that, anyway? Why did everyone treat me like I was second base compared to her? We're both slayers, we both have the wicked superpower thing workin' for us.. not my fault if she decided to die and come back. I was called, damn it. Haven't I earned that respect? But because I was havin' fun with whatever up there gave me I became the bad guy. So yeah.. I killed a man, but that wasn't my fault. He JUMPED into the fire and kiddies, if you do that.. you're gonna get burned. That simple. I did more good than harm but because it wasn't her everyone decided to make an apocalypse outta it.

Well, fine. But I'm sick of livin' in her shadow and everyone tellin' me I should be more like her. No one said anything 'bout her bein' more like me.. and she's the one with the issues. She rather look at her 'chosen life' as a glass half-empty that's her deal. Me? I'm all five by five. I look at it half full, sweetness.

Seemed like forever but I finally made it to the remains of what's left of Sunny-D High. I couldn't help but look.. and wonder. I should've been there.. I should've. I shouldn't have been in that fuckin' hospital bed. If I was there.. I probably could've made a difference.

You wouldn't be dead.

His memory won't be forgotten. I didn't love the guy but that doesn't mean I didn't care for him. He took me in and understood me -- he treated me like an equal an' even a little bit more special. The only person who cared if I breathed..

Damn.

I closed my eyes for a second as I tried to force the memories outta me. Didn't work too well, but at least I didn't get myself worked up. I wasn't gonna sit here and cry like a little girl.. no.. this grief will be better handled when the time comes. It'll help me fight against them.

His memory won't fade, and if it was meant to.. it'll go out with me with a loud bang.

I took what I could before I was finally on the bus that'll lead me away from this pathetic excuse of a town..

Los Angeles.

stake me

la_champions [06 Jun 2004|02:08pm]
[ mood | awake ]

I looked up into the sky in a thoughtful manner. "Think it's gonna rain?" I asked, looking back down to the only person who ever gave a fuck about me.

"Nonsense! It's a beautiful day. Now eat your sandwich." He smiled to me as he motioned to the meal he made near me. I could only shake my head -- I could feel a storm comin' on. Of course, it always works this way.

"I dunno. It just always seems like it starts raining 'bout now." I looked up to the sky again -- not a damn cloud in the sky. But I could feel it.. damn it, I could feel it.

"You're too young and too pretty of a girl to start wearing worry lines on your face!" That was enough to make me smile. I then saw him catch notice upon a snake that seemed to wander near us and he picks it up. I didn't know what was between us but he was just that type of a guy you just couldn't help but love a bit.. it was kinda nice to have someone like him to care for my existance. "Hey there, little fellah. I dunno where you belong, but it's not here with us." He chuckles as he lifts the snake and then sets him back down upon the green grass. "There you go."

He then turns his attention back to me. "Y'see, there's nothing gonna spoil our time together. Who wants cheesecake?"

I looked down for a second and smiled as I then turned my gaze back up to only find her behind him.. with my fuckin' knife. She pulls back the blade and even as much as I wanted to move to stop her -- I couldn't. My body was frozen and all I could do was scream. "NO!"

She sliced through him like he was a stick of butter.. and then looks at me with that wicked grin she always has. "I told you I had things to do."

Right then I felt my body release and it was just like the dozen times before I did it. I knew how it was gonna end.. it always end the same damn way no matter how much I tried. I could only scamper away terrified and get myself into a run to try and get as far away as I possibly could yet she always managed to be close behind me.

All I did was ran, looking behind me every minute to see her trailing my track like some predator. I got myself to a graveyard like always despite of the different turns I took. "GET AWAY FROM ME!" I screamed, suddenly tripping myself into an open grave.

Oh fuck.. here we go. I could feel it coming on. I looked up to find her staring straight back down to me and she falls into it by my side.

I was just about to give in to feel that seering pain reach my gut and play this scene all over again -- but I reached my last thread of patience. I don't know how many times I let this bitch kill me over again but it wasn't gonna happen this time. I felt a revelation consume me. "Sorry B," I growled as the knife was stabbed towards me, her slow movements allowing me to grab a tight hold of her wrist, "payback's a bitch." I took control over my knife and stabbed it straight into her gut, watching her eyes widen in shock.

I did it. I finally DID IT. She fell into the grave and her body melted into dust like it was nothing. The moment she disappeared was when I felt life rush back into my body. She may taken my slice but I got the whole fuckin' cake.

I clawed my way out of what could've been my doomed rerun of a grave and stood up, looking into the storming sky above me. The raindrops felt so real pouring down my face.. I felt alive once again. With satisfaction and her blood on my hands I screamed out my victory cry.

And then suddenly lightning flashes.


*FLASH*

I felt stiff and it was harder to open my eyes but I managed to do it. When I did my vision was a blurred and consumed in lights. What the hell..? I didn't know what to do but sit myself up slowly and look 'round me.. where the hell was I? And what? "Ow!" I hissed as my IV was yanked from my hand -- damn.

I was in a hospital.

stake me

sunnydale_90666 [30 May 2004|09:10am]
[ mood | anxious ]

I sat back into my seat as I idly watched the scenery from the window outside. This bus ride was wicked longer than I expected.. but I figured I should be arriving soon. I lifted my wrist to look at my watch.. it was still pretty early. By the time I arrive it'll still be daylight.

So I'm goin' to Sunny-D to meet up with the legendary Buffy. I probably should've dropped a line or somethin' before I decided to drop by.. but y'know me, I like the big entrance. The way I heard on how things go there she could use my skills.. hey, two slayers, can we say unstoppable? I heard she was good, and I know I am good doin' my job.. so it should be a blast. I bet by the end of the year there won't be a vamp in sight.

God I felt anxious.. I had that itch for a good 'round of slayin'. So much has gone on these last couple of days. My Watcher... no, I'm not gonna think 'bout that. Hell, that memory doesn't even exist as far as I'm concerned. What I don't know can't hurt me, right? This place should be a good spot to start anew.. as long as 'B' will be five by five with me. I can't.. really see a reason on why we wouldn't get along unless she had this huge stick up her ass.

The bus suddenly halted. I blinked before I looked over and saw that I was there.. that quick? Wicked.

"Thanks," I chuckled to the driver who wished me a good day as I stepped down from the bus and onto the grounds of my new home. Gotta hook myself up with a motel room.. I got enough cash to last me a few weeks. Probably could earn more as the days go by.

Dunno where I'd find this 'slayer'.. but once nightfall comes I'm gonna be on the prowl. No doubt she'd probably show up to do some slaying on her own.

"Let's see.." I thoughtfully muttered as I walked along the street. My eyes caught upon a flier that was advertising some kind of club 'round here. 'The Bronze'? Sounds like a good hang.. and a good place to stake out my first few vampires and make myself known.

"Bingo."

stake me

bigbadsunnyd [27 May 2004|06:03pm]
[ mood | blank ]

It felt like I walked for miles until I finally decided to take a break. God.. what the hell was I thinkin' letting Wes go by himself? But if he's that stupid to get himself killed, then he deserved it. I wasn't gonna sit there and get all this wicked mental bullshit. Why can't I just say sorry? WHY? The only moment of peace I had with myself was when I was behind bars. Now that I'm out.. I don't know what to do with myself. I feel out of place with everyone. Mental bullshit.. how could I avoid it?

"This isn't going to be easy on you, Faith, and let's face it-- it shouldn't be."

I can't get those words outta my head. It's playing to me again and again like some broken record. I already know it shouldn't be easy for me -- I don't fuckin' deserve it. But I also don't know how to deal with it. Every single time they start scrapin' in me with everything I've done I feel like I'm going to explode. Not like I asked a damn one of 'em to forgive me but it's like everyone prefers to be melodramatic than just offer a hand of help.

I needed a drink.

It was so much easier when I didn't care. Damn it Angel, why didn't you just kill me in the alley like I begged for you to do? Why didn't you give up on me like everyone else?

I sat myself down on the bench and buried my face within my hands. Didn't know where the hell I was.. didn't care. Just thinkin' about all the crap makes me feel like I want to cry.. but I won't. I don't cry. I'm stronger than that. Whoever said that 'crying makes you stronger' is a complete liar because all you get in return is pity and I don't want pity.

Maybe I do.. maybe a little. Is it so bad just to feel like someone cares? Even if they're lyin'? I'd kill to have B look at me one more time like she used to do before shit went down.

I lifted my head and looked up as I breathed in the cool night air. I was shakin' a little bit like I was going to have some mental breakdown. Wes was right about one thing.. it might be good to talk to someone but it's not like I could. No one knows what it's like.

No one.

Where's soulboy when you need him? And fuck the drink. I need to get laid.

stake me

_we_happy_few_ [26 May 2004|01:11pm]
[ mood | content ]

Couldn't help but feel sorry for the guy.. he looked so bummed. Looked like the zeppo could handle the situation alone so I made my departure. So it's official then? Robin is my Watcher? Oh man.. this is gonna be hilarious to see how things turn out -- see how wicked his game can be. He's probably squirmin' over the situation.. I've always seem to have that effect on men.

The meeting was over and I had nothin' to do. Last I saw Woody needed to get some food in his belly so I'm gonna allow him to do that before I decide to bug him with the training schedules. Besides 'drew, everyone seems pretty satisfied with their pairings. I dunno.. I still think I should be over the Slayer/Watcher gig but hey -- it might actually stick to me this time if Woody doesn't decide to shove a stick up his ass. I know I'm good but there's always room to be better, y'know?

I sat myself back into the chair while I watched one of the slayer girls walk out of the kitchen with two soda cans in her hands. "Hey," I called out to her with a grin.. I was feeling a little thirsty, "toss a can this way?" She gave me a weird look but did it anyway and I caught it.

"Thanks sweets." I chuckled, offering a wink as she rolled her eyes and marched her way back. Jeez.. some chicks really need to lighten up. Not gonna stop me from enjoying my soda, though.

I paused for a second before I brought the coca-cola to my lips. Heh.. I'm diggin' this LA lifestyle. Just gotta get out to it more. No one will have any problem with it, right? Not like I would listen, anyway. I need to get out of here before I explode.

Maybe tonight.. if nothing comes up.

2 stakes through the heart | stake me

hellmouth_of_la [22 May 2004|09:27pm]
[ mood | thoughtful ]

I didn't know how long it was gonna be until I could get back to Angel so I just crashed myself into a motel for a couple of days. I left my number on Harmony's desk and a small note for him just to get ahold of me whenever he could.

Probably wasn't the best greeting you ever did with B, Faith. You really need to backoff the drama bullshit and just let things fry away. We did fight side by side in the fall of Sunny-D and I'm pretty sure she's gotten over our little differences so I dunno what the hell was up.. with me. I'll just tell her I had a rough night if she ever asks and that everything is five by five now. She must be feelin' a bit out of the loop.. one, Angel.. two, when she finds out Spike is still alive if he even is -- that fucker has been missing for days. Knowin' him though he probably needed to storm off an' blow some steam after he found out of B's coming arrival. Whoo.. I gotta watch that scene when it happens. Note to self, bring some popcorn.. that's gonna be a wicked show.

The cops finally calmed down a bit so I think I can go back to my normal slayer duties and do some patrolling in some graveyards.. I have a lot of agression to let go. I pity the first vamp I'm gonna see.. or demon.. whichever comes first.

"All right Faith girl," I chimed quietly to myself as I looked into the mirror, leaning myself forward slightly as I inspected the tiny scratch left above my brow from my night with the cops, "time to loosen yourself up a bit." I stretched myself back.. outfit looks good, makeup looks good, hair looks good. Tonight's agenda was gonna be a blast.. gonna do some clubbin' and then some slaying. Normally I would invite B but I don't exactly have her number or location.. didn't give myself much of a chance to find out. Maybe I'll run into her.

I reached over for my coat and pulled it over my shoulders as I stepped out the door and onto the busy streets of LA.

stake me

bigbadsunnyd [12 May 2004|09:43am]
[ mood | anxious ]

Nope. No luck with the demon slayin' thing. I nabbed myself a few good vampires at the graveyard but they were a breeze. I actually had to keep them around before it actually felt that I was fightin' something. One of them though did lay in a good punch which left a wicked bruise on my stomach.. ouch. I can only be thankful that slayers heal quickly or else I'd be hurtin' tomorrow morning. That was the last dosage that the vampire did to get me all wired and he was met by the end of my stake.

The buzz from that round didn't last too long. I still felt the need to kick some ass but all the vampires were beginning to retire for the night. Maybe I could find myself a nest.. it's just a little more fun to do it during the day when they feel safe and snugged in their dark depressing crypts only to be greeted by the burning sensation of sunlight and a stake through their heart. I love the look on their faces.. that look of just complete fear. Get's a girl all hot lemme tell you.

Well, a girl like me anyway.

I held my stake tightly against my forearm as I slowly stride myself through the graveyard, my eyes darting toward any movement I could even catch. Each was just a stray cat runnin' around.. so I just came to a halt. Maybe I'll have more luck tomorrow night. It was late anyway.

But damn it, I wasn't ready to kick in yet. Somethin' good had to happen with everything goin' on.. reason why I came out of jail in the FIRST place. I'll probably catch B.. she's gotta have somethin' for me to do.

stake me

_we_happy_few_ [12 May 2004|08:46am]
[ mood | hungry ]

"Good Morning Everyone."

I just got done changing into my attire when I heard the Big Cheese's voice on the speakers. I figured it'd still be a couple of days before we even got started.. but hey. Quick is good. It also gave me a motivating jump start on my day.

"It's time to start our daily meetings. I'm sorry it took us so long to do so. It is now 8 AM. I expect everyone to meet down here by 8:45a. No later. I have the schedule of slayers and 'watchers', teachers, etc."

B and everyone else will be there. I haven't seen B since the whole wicked mess in Sunny-D went down.. kinda seperated our ways after that because I needed a bit of time to myself. Odd enough I'm actually feelin' a bit excited to see her and the others -- it'll be like old times yet.. not. Last I remembered we were on good terms so I hope it remains that way.. I really don't feel like dealing with daytime television drama bullshit. I just want to move on with my life and let things rest and fry away.. but I already know peace with myself ain't really an easy thing to find on the map. I'll get there eventually.

I got 45 minutes to chill until the meeting. I probably have enough time to run down and grab me a cup at the nearby Starbucks but damn, I said I got motivation but not that much. I was still sore from my training last night which was more with just me and my friendly punching bag.. I just didn't understand what got my muscles so tensed. Probably out of the loop of my slaying.. I really need to get back into that. I miss my midnight romps in the graveyard of doing nothing but kicking ass and making my day better while making another's their last. Slaying was my way to let go of my agression and built up tension and GOD knows I have a lot of that to give out.

.. Sex? What the hell is that?

Sometimes I feel like I'm losing my wicked self by hangin' around with all these goodies. Not meaning my WICKED self of the whole vengeance and torture thing but the wild girl I came to enjoy. I can't remember the last time I just went into a club and danced.. swaying my hips and watching all the boys line up before me. Gotta admit, I miss the attention. I could just go off right now and nab myself a boy-toy but I'm here playing Superhero.

Feels like all of them are breathing down my back. I gotta show that Faith still has a head screwed on tight upon her shoulders.

I felt hungry all of a sudden. A bagel with some cream cheese sounds good. I began to head myself downstairs to nab myself something to eat.

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