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August 29th, 2007

07:50 pm: Oh, and I forgot to mention...
...the 9-ounce bag of snack mix I had as a snack a couple of hours ago. :)

07:45 pm: Mmmmm ... Mickey D's
Yes, I am still here with a bunch of McDonald's food here in front of me. No, I don't normally do this, but *chomp* I decided to tonight. I've got *swallow* *bite* a QPC extra value meal with large fries and Coke *chew*, 20-piece McNuggets, and McFlurry, now in the fridge. *swallow* Now to continue my good work. :)

Current Location: Maryland
Current Mood: hungryhungry

December 13th, 2006

08:10 pm: Still here ... honest!
Sorry, but I haven't had much time / opportunity / wish to post. I assure you I'm still aROUND, though. :)

I'll try to be better, but everyone's said that at one time or another.

Current Location: home
Current Mood: fullfull of cheese steak
Current Music: Craig Ferguson show

February 28th, 2006

10:43 am: What Kind of Donut Are You?
You Are a Jelly Donut

So you're a little rounder than most folks - but it's only in the right places!
You maintain a clean exterior, even if you're all messy on the inside.
You think you're the best, and that's mostly true...
But remember, you're just an empty shell without your jelly!

Current Mood: hungryhungry

January 25th, 2006

07:58 pm: How I Got Here Part 1.5 - Intermission
So anyway, I'd just graduated college in '88, and the job that I'd hoped to get went away in a puff of smoke when the engineering job market went kerflooey. So I ended up going to grad school, albeit briefly. It's hard to believe now that those 3 months would be the ones that affected my life the most. While I was in grad school, I started talking to this girl online whose interests -- not these :) -- were similar to mine. She and I had grown up a few minutes from each other, and here we were in different states, exchanging emails and making long phone calls. When I essentially flunked out of grad school, she and I got the chance to meet for the first time ...

... where I was quickly dumped like a bad habit. It's not like we were going out at the time, but it still stung.

I spent my free time trying to find a job and found one a couple of hours north of where my parents used to live, and I started my career. In the meantime, this girl and I continued to converse at least a little bit, but not as much as before. I'd like to hope she thought me persistent rather than pestering, and that's the way it seemed to go. In 1990 after going out on a few dates, it was pretty well decided that we were meant for each other, and I asked her to marry me. Of course, to one up me, she said yes and asked me to marry her.

What a kidder. :)

In the midst of all this, I continued to work, but my boss and I didn't exactly see eye to eye on very much ... OK, make that nothing. The man was a mean-spirited son-of-a-bitch type A micromanaging asshole. Yeah, TFG, tell us what you really think! Without very much choice in the matter, at the end of '92, he told me that I should take my unmarried self out to the Midwest for 3 months, live there, and learn the manufacturing process for this product. So I moved out of my old apartment, put my stuff into storage, drove 1000 miles, and started work there right after New Year's in '93. I eventually came back, moved into a new apartment, and life was good.

Over these few years, I don't think I gained much weight -- maybe some, but not an overly noticeable amount. I wasn't trying one way or the other. Life was just happening with little regard for my size. Food was fuel, be it steak, salad, and potatoes, or sweets, junk, and all the other really good fattening stuff.

With that said, and feeling more like I've contributed some to this journal, I'm going to digest the pie, Double Stuff Oreos, and milk I had on top of the popcorn and soda I had at the movies earlier. I'll likely double those contributions before the night is through.

Next up: Part 2. Where I actually discover weight gain.

Current Mood: contentcontent

January 18th, 2006

05:51 pm: How I Got Here, Part I
Obviously, there's history behind how a person grows from a fairly normal size to somewhere around 500 pounds. That latter point is where I am today obviously, ergo, the ID. But it wasn't all deliberate gaining to get there. Kind of cool to think so, but not so.

So here we go...

We harken back to 1976 and the Montreal Olympics. Why is this so crucial? It was my first diet.

At the age of 9.

I was too heavy to play football with the Pop Warner group, and I was just kind of "meh" about it. I weighed in the neighborhood of 150 at the time at a guess, and my mother seemed to take this as an opportunity to force "good health" upon me by trimming my evening meals to cottage cheese, salads, and tuna salad on lettuce.

At the age of 9.

I mean, come on, people! This is not the sort of thing you do to a 9-year-old. Think about the impression it makes! People in positions of authority are going to take away the things you like to eat now. Aren't you going to want to eat lots and lots of them in the future? It seems logical to me, as it should to you. I lost weight, but I wasn't happy about it. Up through high school, they paid for me to be part of a fitness club -- which to be fair, I did use -- tried to bribe me with monetary gifts per pound lost, etc. All that typical stuff.

Do I hate my mom or dad for it? No, of course not. They were only doing what they thought was right. Maybe it was, and maybe it wasn't. I don't happen to think it was. Of course, during all of this, I was also being encouraged to clean my plate and asked if I was still hungry. There's a mixed signal in there, right?

Consequently, I also snuck food when no one was looking. Frankly, the best times for that came along when I was a teenager and got involved in volunteer firefighting. I would do one of two things. One would be to go over to the firehouse with whatever crunchy, cheesy, or crunchy and cheesy snack I could get my hands on at the local supermarket and eat the entire bag with a Coke. The other would be to go out for an evening constitutional of sorts: going out in the family car, getting some food, driving around and eating it, then going home after getting rid of the evidence.

And it wasn't like I was huge coming out of high school either. I was 6'2" and fat at around 260 or 270 when I graduated high school in the summer of '84. That's maybe half the size I am today. I certainly wasn't unhappy. I was me, and I was fat, and it was what it was.

In college, I was a nerd. And frankly, where I went to school, who wasn't? I ate a little more freely and probably gained and lost the same 30 pounds more than a few times. When I graduated college in '88, I was probably around 300 pounds. Pretty big, obviously, but not mondo huge. I had a step or two to take before that happened.

As for now, I'm going to have another cookie or two, cruise the blogs I read regularly, then head off to grab my lovely wife and go out to dinner at a nice seafood restaurant where I'll be having whatever isn't fish. :) It's not my favorite; whatever.

Eat up!

Current Mood: satisfiedsatisfied

January 13th, 2006

06:59 pm: Just a quick update. I'm away this weekend at an intellectual pursuit of mine, and Domino's is my current best friend. Cheesy Bread, Chicken Kickers, Cinna Stix, and Coke ... all in my belly.

And I'm not as full as I thought I'd be.

Current Mood: contentcontent

January 12th, 2006

01:28 pm: An Introduction
For those of you wondering who this strange person was who suddenly friended you, it's me. Thank you for friending me back if you already have. If you haven't, I hope you will.

I set this up yesterday as an outlet for my not-so-public side. We've all got our masks to wear. Like most fat people, mine aren't exactly 100% private, but there's still a side I keep to myself for the most part.

Leaving aside my LJ ID for the moment, I'm a 39-year-old guy. I'm married to a wonderful woman, and we just celebrated our 11th anniversary. We have no children, but have your typical dumb-as-a-doorknob cat. I have a job which pays me well, and I support my family well. Both my parents are still alive and married to each other, and my younger sister has been married for 9 years to a good guy. My in-laws are separated, and my sister-in-law is very nice.

And I'm a big, fat, bald, white guy. Emphasis on the second adjective there. Thus, the LJ ID you see here.

I'm 6'2", weigh in the vicinity of 500 pounds, and have been fairly steady at this weight now for more than a few years. I typically wear size 64 pants and 5X shirts.

As a famous philosopher once said, "I am what I am, and that's all that I am."

I'm a fat guy; it's what I am.

More later...

Current Mood: fullfull of lunch
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