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[03 Mar 2008|09:13am]
Ha Hello Hello. I have not been on here much at all. Sorry about that
Everything is going great right now
read 4 cmt

[18 Jul 2007|01:04am]
[ mood | crushed ]

Oh hello..

I thought this feeling wouldn't come so soon.

This is just another breaking point
where you feel like you have been losing from the beginning.

Like a stab that just sliced you down the middle..
twisted so the blood will be impossible to stop.
It's another time to evaluate one's self and blame the part of you that could have been so stupid.

Trust.. what a funny word. So many less people to trust in the world as a minute rolls by. Tell me why does this happen so soon so soon.

It turns out I am not allowed at Eric's anymore because a foolish mistake brought by an innocent recollection. I somehow knew this situation would be the end of alot of things. But I never thought it would be so severe.
Just let this be known. I hate you Tom.


[10 Jul 2007|01:32am]
[ mood | rejected ]

I am shaking and I feel like I am bleeding out my eyes
How come you treat this like you didn't throw me into a car crash
It hurts and I feel every bone splitting
Go ahead and pretend nothing happened
Go ahead and pretend I am not thinking about it
This light is fading into a loney darkness
And I am standing middle stage

Blah I feel so played right now. Fuck Tom..
Fuck for letting guys make you guy in that fact.

read 2 cmt

[07 Jul 2007|01:31pm]
[ mood | confused ]

This entry will be alittle long.. but this is pretty much about this guy right here

Oh I don't know what to do.
I guess I should tell you that this kid has been my friend for the past 5 or so months and I liked him right off but he has a 3 year girlfriend named Missy.
I heard from Kim a couple months ago that Tom told Kim's boyfriend Eric that he wasn't in love with Missy anymore, at all, but he didn't know how to break it off cause if he does leave her she will have like no where to go.
So I was content with being his friend, and I didn't think I had the chance with him at all.
He is one of those guys where you think is too good for you and would probably never think twice about you.
Well I guess I was wrong
The night of July 4th after watching fireworks with the family, Kim and I went over to Eric's to drink. Tom and his friend Nelson came about an hour after we got there. Missy was asleep. Tom stared at me (he does that alot so I didn't think twice about it) and asked if I was alright, because I had drinkin alot to get me alittle tipsy. I said I was alright and to make a long story short.. sometime everyone started to go to bed. So Nelson Tom and our friend Thanh left.
As I was getting settled on the couch and just turned the light off, someone knocked on the door. It was Tom and Nelson. Tom said he had lost his phone and we began searching for it. I went into the bathroom to look and Tom followed me... closing the door.
Now this bathroom isn't that huge in size... so we where pretty close.
I was nervous and confused.. wtf was going on. He stared at me with his look
It's not a -bad- look. But it would make you want to do some evil things to him...
It basically looks like he is going to eat you.. looking you up and down.. biting his lip.. It is hella sexy.. my heart was pounding and I was shocked he didn't hear it... He told me I had very beautiful eyes.. (after the 3 time of telling me because I couldn't hear him) And I was shocked. HE WAS HITTING ON ME.. I didn't know what to do so I stupidly said he has pretty eyes too.. and that we should find his phone.. and he kept on staring at me with that look and I didn't know what to do.. I wanted to kiss him but I was afraid to.. somehow I managed to get the door open and all and all they left right.. (making story short) I didn't do anything with him but I was freaking out and told Kim.. she couldn't believe it either because seriously
I had no fucking clue that he would go for me.. even remotely...

Soo I texted him the next day to see if he found his phone and he said he had.. obviously and I asked where it was.. he said his pants..
He tried to make an excuse that he wasn't really all there but he said that cause I didn't react well and I told him that.. I asked if he did the whole I lost my phone thing on purpose.. he said "kinda" and told me not to tell anyone.

Well yesterday I saw him for the first time after that incident... He would look at me.. I would look down. If I held his gaze I would get shivers and my heart would pound and I would feel shocks in my body. And he did something for the first time since I have known him.. he didn't go home with Missy.. she left first alone.. pissed. (They usually always leave together)

I don't know what to do
I notice Tom doesn't go to missy and hug her or do anything. Missy always does. He looked troubled alot yesterday when I was there.. but I like being close to him..
wtf am I going to do?

[15 Jun 2007|01:15am]
New layout cause my old one sucked balls

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