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Jun. 14th, 2010

(no subject)

Back again, this must be some kind of record.  Yesterday was one of my best friends birthday.  Life just wouldn't be worth living if there wasn't some drama.  Once we got that out of the way we had a really fun time at Phil's our favorite pizza joint.  It's so special for me to see my best friend turning 20.  I've known her since she was born and I just feel so blessed to have been there to see her grow up to be the beautiful person she is.  I know how sappy right?  It just puts things into perspective.  Work is gonna be fun this week.  It's our company's 25th anniversary so we're doing little fun things everyday leading up to Thursday when we have a catered lunch come in and our volunteer day on Friday.  I'm happy that most people are appreciative of all the hard work I'm doing to make sure everything goes smoothly on Friday.  I'm not really sure how I feel about turning 26 on Friday.  I just feel like I'm going to be 26 and what do I have to show for it?  Most normal 26 year olds are married either have a child or going to have a child, granted I'll stick with furry and four legged babies.  I dunno I just wonder if I'm a dud when it comes to love? 

Jun. 7th, 2010

Back again

Well hello my poor neglected journal.  Life is just flying by and before you know it you have a neglected journal.  Where to start?  Work is great and crazy busy just the way I like it.  The family is great, my brother will be starting high school in the fall, that statement makes me feel so old.  I'll be turning 26 next Friday.  My best friend's father passed away on Thanksgiving last year and we're all still trying to cope with the sudden loss of a great person.  Father's day this year to say the least is going to be hard for everyone.  I'm finally going to take the time to do somethings to better myself.  I'm not getting any younger so I better get a move on it.  There's no point in waiting any longer it's not going to get any easier.  

I don't know just the feeling of getting older and looking back at my early twenties as I advance into my later twenties I feel like I'm wasting my life.  I don't have a very high opinion about myself, and if I want to get any where I need to change that and fast.  Why is it that I can have some of the best advice for my friends and I can see all the good in them, but when I step in front of the mirror all I see is a failure?  I really wish that I could find a time machine and go back a few years knowing what I know now and have my life go in a different direction.  I was so happy just a few years ago for the first time.  With that being said all the time and effort I've used to make myself unhappy I need to work twice as hard to make myself happy.  I mean don't get me wrong I have a pretty good life, I have family and friends that love me for me, and I have a great job that I enjoy, I have a dog that I love like a child (she's my fur baby lol, I just like saying that I'm not that crazy.)  Maybe I just need a good outlet to tell  my feelings to again.  I just don't want to come on here everyday and say oh wah my life is crap blah blah blah.

That is going to be one of the steps in my self improvement.  I need to realize that no matter how bad I think things might be that there are always others that have it much worse then I do.  For most instances things really aren't as bad as they seem.  I don't want to say that I don't appreciate the things I have in my life because I do.  I guess if life were easy and we always got what we wanted or things always fell into place easily then life would be too easy and unsatisfying.  I don't know as I read over this I think to myself man girl are you bipolar or what?  Alright I'm going to sign off now before I make myself sound more like a ungrateful spoiled brat.  =-/

Jun. 13th, 2008

Random thoughts...

 It's Friday - I can't believe that my birthday is on Wednesday.  This year is flying by.  I gave the dog a bath today that was fun.  I really need to get a facial.  I'm tired the storm last night freaked out my mom's dog so guess who she came to visit?  My friend Andrea laid her grandad to rest and the family is slowly moving on without him.  It sucks that father's day is this weekend.  She gave me my birthday gifts today they are totally awesome.  I got this picture of Jack from Nightmare Before Christmas playing a guitar looking like a rock star I love it.  I got a Chicgo Cubs Mr. Potato Head, a Chicago Cubs tin that had some turtles inside it.  She made me a pink and black beaded bracelet with a silver M in the middle it's very cute (I'm wearing it now.)  I got a Pug coffee cup or a Pug mug as I calls it and a $20 dollar giftcard to Gamestop.  So far I've made out like a bandit...Oh and I can't forget she paid for my concert ticket for John Mayer.  I feel special.  Oh and the birthday card is awesome.  It's got Snoopy and the Peanuts gang and when you open it, it plays the Peanuts theme - Love it!!!  Umm what else how bout them Cubs I love them!

Jun. 5th, 2008


 I want to know why people who ride bikes dress and act like they are Lance Armstrong?  I also want to know why my stomach hurts? 

May. 27th, 2008

Pissed as hell

My brother took my digital camera after I told him he couldn't and lost one of my memory sticks and erased all the pictures I had on the other memory stick.  All of my pictures of my doggie when she was a baby are gone.  I'm literally heart broken. 

May. 25th, 2008

Finally finding my groove..?

Wow last updated 131 weeks ago, that's a very long time.  Life, >>sigh<< life has been challenging is really the only word that comes to mind.  Life seems to challenge me everyday to see if I can stand firm in my beliefs and convictions.  I've gained and lost friends and family over the last 131 weeks.  I've had highs and lows, although there seems to have been more lows then highs.  I do think it's safe to say that things are looking up.  I've got my family who loves me NO MATTER WHAT - emphsis on the no matter what part.  My friends circle may be a bit small, but that's okay by me because we've always got each others backs.  I've got my wonderful puppy (she's not a puppy technically, but she'll always be a puppy to me) Snuggles and a great job.  The love life could be in a better situation, but that will fix itself in time.  My nickname as of late has been "Little Miss Sunshine" and I think I kinda like that.

Oct. 28th, 2005

(no subject)

I haven't typed in this thing in like forever. I am still alive and kicking, although at times I wonder. Things are fine I guess. They could be worse. I'm at work right now on my lunch break. I'm playing Jungle Gin and I thought man I haven't typed for a long ass time. So yeah ummm I've moved out of my parents house and I live with a friend. So that's cool and scary all at the same time. But I guess I'm a big girl and I can be an adult when I need to. I've said it before and I'll say it again I'm everyone's mother. I'm always looked upon as a "mommy." I'm freezing my ass off here at work. They've never heard of this thing called heat. I'm not a dog my nose doesn't need to be cold. Oh well gotta jet back to work lunch is over. Later!

Dec. 5th, 2004

(no subject)

No matter how I feel happy, sad, angry, stressed, depressed these two John Mayer songs help me to pull through. I'm so totally thankful for John Mayer I don't know where I'd be without these songs.

I worry
I weigh three times my body
I worry
I throw my fear around
But this morning
There's a calm I cant explain
The rock candy's melted, only diamonds now remain

By the time I recognize this moment
This moment will be gone
But I will bend the light pretending
That it somehow lingered on

And I will wait to find
If this will last forever
And I will wait to find
If this will last forever
And I will wait to find
That it won't and it won't because it can't
It just can't
(It's not supposed to)

Was there a second of time I looked around?
Did I sail through or just drop my anchor down?
Was anything enough to kiss the ground
And say I'm here now

So much wasted in the afternoon
So much sacred in the month of June
How 'bout you?

And I will wait to find
If this will last forever
And I will pay no mind
When it won't and it won't
Because it won't
And I will waste no time
Worried 'bout no rainy weather
And I will waste no time
Remaining in our lives together

People have the right to fly
And will when it gets compromised
Their hearts say 'move along'
Their minds say 'gotcha heart'
'Let's move it along'

And airports see it all the time
Where someone's last goodbye
Blends in with someone's sigh
Cause someone's coming home
In hand a single rose

And that's the way this wheel keeps working now
That's the way this wheel keeps working now
And I won't be the last
No I won't be the last
To love her

You can't build a house of leaves
And live like it's an evergreen
It's just a season thing
It's just this thing the seasons do

And that's the way this wheel keeps working now
That's the way this wheel keeps working now
And you don't be the first
No you won't be the first
To love me

You can find me
If you ever want again
I'll be around the bend
I'll be around the bend
I'll be around

And if you never stop when you wave goodbye
You just might find if you give it time you will wave hello again
You just might wave hello again

And that's the way this wheel keeps working now
That's the way this wheel keeps working now

You can't love too much one part of it
You can't love too much one part of it

I believe that my life's gonna see
That love I give returned to me

Oct. 19th, 2004

(no subject)

Tonight Taboo Tuesday will consume my night. Wee! I'll get to see my hunny for three days in a row. I'm still floating on cloud nine!

Oct. 12th, 2004

(no subject)

You may be feeling dark and brooding emotions, yet you still try to act nice and light. You are more comfortable when you stay in the rational realms of hard data. Information may be what is important, but if you lose touch with your own feelings, you also lose touch with your ability to make magic. Slow down and get to know your shadow.

So for the past 3 days I've been listening to the George Strait I bought on Friday. I'm like obessed! I guess I'm just a country girl at heart.

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