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Alex

[ website | Nice shirt, hate to bloody it. ]
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[ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

[Saturday, July 30th, 2005
at 1:12am
]
We could have had a good apartment but nope, our timing is fucked up and we dont see each other enough. God damn having to work. I want to get the fuck out of this shitty hotel and move into a real place. No apartment yet. All I do is work lately. So much I never see him. Thats just fucking annoying. Sounds exciting? No, it's not but I figured I'd keep up fucktards informed. I "promise" the next update will be longer.

I'm fucking exhausted.
How many retards? 1 had some lame shit to say.

[Monday, July 25th, 2005
at 7:40pm
]
Yeah, I never update this shit anymore. Gasp - I have a fucking life. I got this thing when I had all the fucking spare time in the world. You know, being single and not social because most of you are fuckfaces anyway. I know who the fuck my friends are. And Sully is cooler than you people anyway. So basically it's finalizing the apartment shit and working with Sharpe. Which isn't so bad because it's nice to actually have someone stand there and make fun of people with you.

And I get to shove nachos in his face. Doing that to anyone at any time is always a plus. I'd update with more - but frankly its really nobody's fucking business. If you want to give me something to update about, IM me or whatever. I may not like you, but I don't fucking bite.
How many retards? 3 had some lame shit to say.

[Wednesday, July 20th, 2005
at 4:00pm
]
Yeah. Went to the fucking carnival the other day. Talked to Nash. Hung with Furbes for a bit. Hubby showed up. Rode the roller coaster. Ended up ditching Nash and Furbes. Furbes hates Sully. Sully hates Furbes and I can tell Nash doesn't like him either. I'm sick of everyone shit. Just fucking deal with it. I want everyone to be fucking civil. Then me and Sully went off to act like a fucking couple. Because we're so awesome and do all that carnival shit. Or whatever.

Still working on that apartment.

Sully,

care to fucking check out the places thata re left so we can just fucking move out of this hotel? It would be good.

love, your wife.

How fucking affectionate. Only not, but whatever - I'm just tired of waiting. I wouldn't say its wrong of me to want to live in a fucking steady place with my husband, right? Yeah didn't fucking think so. There's something fucking trashy about living out of a hotel for two and half months.
How many retards? 1 had some lame shit to say.

[Friday, July 15th, 2005
at 3:08pm
]
Here's a fucking tip. Don't make out with trashy chicks in front of your ex-girlfriend. It proves that you are a complete douche. I tried to not let her see, but she fucking looked. And what the fuck was with Furbes? I could tell she kind of wants him. Thats fucking disgusting. Whatever. Don't fucking talk to me, you're a fucking bigger loser than I thought you were, emoshit.

Aside from that fucking ridiculous fiasco, shits been good. I think we may have finally settled on a fucking apartment. Or at least have it narrowed down. Married life is fucking good. Yeah, I'm actually happy as fuck right now. How fucking weird. I'm thinking of telling bitchwoman about it next week. Maybe I can give the cunt a fucking heart attack. That would be gold.

I'll just leave out the part where my dad is still doing shitty and all that. Or at least that I feel shitty about it. I think the old man is gonna croak soon. But no, you all are not invited to the funeral when it happens. Like I want people to fucking see me at a time when I know I'll be a wreck.
How many retards? 7 had some lame shit to say.

[Thursday, July 14th, 2005
at 5:33pm
]
It's a feeling that you cannot miss.Collapse )
had some lame shit to say.

[Friday, July 8th, 2005
at 9:15pm
]
I feel like such a fucking softie. Love is weird shit. I never felt like this with Jay. Or any fucking other person. I like it though. It's secure. I needed security. I spent my whole fucking life, especially the last six years in the most insecure situations. Abuse, abandonment and all this other bullshit. And then along comes this complete prick who turns out to be... nothing of that sort. Fucking amazing in every way and god damn I feel like a sap saying it. He's changed a lot of shit though. And I changed myself because I fucking love him. I needed to change. Nobody else will see it though. I've got a fucking reputation to uphold.

Married life is fucking wonderful. Seriously. Apartment hunting this week. And we will be having an apartment warming party so you fuckers better be cool and show up once we move in. and maybe some like... shit. i'm not made of fucking money and we need crap.

Yeah, I don't know what else to say. Just an pointless fucking update.
had some lame shit to say.

[Wednesday, July 6th, 2005
at 5:34pm
]
Yeah, so we did it. I really want to say I don't give a shit if you don't like it, but the fact of the matter is I do give a shit, because it's annoying as all fucking hell to have some people tell you shit when they don't know the story. You're not in our heads, you're not fucking there behind closed doors. If you think you know a damn thing about our relationship, you need a fucking reality check. There's a lot more shit going on than you realize.

It was nice and fucking simple. Quiet, no bullshit. Just in an out and a lot less stressful than those fucking bridezilla bitches. Rings and all, good shit. I was actually fucking FLOORED by the ring. Me - floored by anything? Yeah that shit doesn't really happen. I love him. Holy shit. My husband. It's still weird to say that.

Bullshitted to Meeri so I could get a couple of days off. Pretty much dropped off the face of the fucking planet for obvious reasons. We're looking for an apartment now. Hotel rooms are annoying and unreliable.

Oh yeah, and keep the hate bullshit to yourself, because I don't wanna hear it or see it. If you say some stupid shit, I will knock you so fucking hard in your jaw that it will break. I'm not gonna fucking hesitate. We did what we needed wanted to do. It's life so fucking deal with it or shut up.
How many retards? 5 had some lame shit to say.

[Friday, July 1st, 2005
at 2:39pm
]
We're getting married.

"OMGZWTFFBBQHUH?!?!?" Shut the fuck up. I don't give a shit if you like it. I don't give a shit if you don't. Shock, I actually feel like shit without him, and I'll actually fucking admit that. He knows it. I think everyone fucking does after last night. If I acted like Brooks (ie, a whiny, emo bitch), disregard that shit, everyone has their fucking off nights. All that matters is me and my boyfriend fiance worked shit out.

Again, I don't give a shit if you disapprove. I don't give a shit if you don't believe the truth. I know the truth. He does. People with half a fucking brain know. It's called getting a clue and being able to fucking trust your signifigant other.

Which is something Sully DOESNT do. He didn't trust me. And he still pretty much doesn't. But he's trying. His dad has fucked him up real good. Real fucking good. But I feel like shit without him. I actually DO love the asshole. Go fucking figure. We're working on it. He said he's not gonna leave me again... he backed it up with a fucking proposal. I'm still shocked. In a good way though. He better not leave again. But now he knows whats going on. With all the family shit. The bastard really is all I have.

And I'll end this awesome as fuck entry by saying this: I will never name my kid Sally. Sally Sullivan? Sally Sully? What the fuck? No. IT WAS FIGURATIVE. Thank you.
How many retards? 8 had some lame shit to say.

[Thursday, June 30th, 2005
at 5:30pm
]
If I could, I would quit my fucking job. It's goddamn boring. Nobody goes to the theatre anymore unless they want to fucking fight with me, and I'm left with Meeri bitching at me like a fucking ugly cow when I take a break. Bullshit? Yes.

And to make it more pleasant, my exboyfriend shows up to argue with me. I want to forgive him. I do. But he fucking broke up with me. I fucking needed him around. My life continues to fall to shit and he was the one basically swearing up and down that he'd be on my side with shit. That he'd be there for me. Then he breaks up with me and fucking splits? I hate men. Fucking unreliable. He wouldn't even tell me why. How am I supposed to take him back. Which basically ended up being a lost cause because i went back to work, and then took off as soon as my shift was over.

And then I got wasted. Not by myself, but I got shitfaced and it felt good. I needed it. Hanging out with Jay makes me feel better. I passed out on his bed. It felt like old times, but with out all the screwing and couple-y bullshit. Just two drunk fuckheads falling asleep after a couple of bottles of Jagermeister, Absolut, and Bacardi. My friends.

Hangovers kind of suck. I deal. Whatever.
How many retards? 2 had some lame shit to say.

[Monday, June 27th, 2005
at 6:33pm
]
Here's all you need to know. Me and Sully broke up. I'm moving back in with my mom. My dad is practically dead.

My reactions to this? Anyone who thought we were going last was insane anyway. Which means I'm fucking in need of solitary confinement. Where the fuck did this relationship go wrong? Shit happens. I hate her.I hate her.I hate her.I hate her.I hate her.I hate her. Yeah I don't care, he treated me like shit anyway. I'm a good liar.

Whatever. If anyone wants to fucking hang out or something.. yeah. Whatever. I don't give a shit anymore.

My life is falling apart. To half time? No. I'm quoting some lame emo band song. FUCK. I don't like this. I'm becoming me again. Old me. The me I fucking hated because she was a lame, weak piece of shit. Get over it Lexxi. You're fine. You're strong. You don't need a guy.

Was I in love? Or was I distracting myself from thinking about Jay? Probably. I don't know why. I'm happy he's with Kerwin and they're fucking happy and all that shit I'll never really have.

My head is too cluttered.


I'm out.
How many retards? 2 had some lame shit to say.

[Saturday, June 25th, 2005
at 2:09pm
]
I hate bullshit.

The end.

El fin.
How many retards? 1 had some lame shit to say.

[Sunday, June 19th, 2005
at 11:07am
]
I love when everything is fucked up. Really, I fucking do. Because fighting with Sully and finding out your dad is pretty much as good as fucking gone all in one day really makes for fucking awesome news. Especially when you've got people throwing death threats in the way of your father, which is nothing short of fucking pointless because he's pretty much a fucking vegtable now.

Too bad I actually feel like shit about all this. A stroke. A fucking STROKE. of course, he had to be in that small percentage that left him so fucked up that they're about ready to pull the fucking plug and put him out of his misery. Yeah, my family sucks, but he was the only one who ever actually gave a shit about me. I never fucking forgave him after he "abandoned" us, and now it's too fucking late. Because I was actually going to try and make amends sometime soon. Fuck. And then Sully's dad has to be a bigger fucking asshole. I hope the man gets hit by a fucking bus and dies. I truly fucking do.

Whatever. I'm fucking out.
How many retards? 2 had some lame shit to say.

[Tuesday, June 14th, 2005
at 6:03pm
]
This is bull-fucking-shit, and when I see you, I'm going to fucking hurt you.

You're a fucking asshole.

What the fuck is going on? Why is he doing this? God dammit. I'm so fucking screwed.
had some lame shit to say.

[Saturday, June 11th, 2005
at 3:57pm
]
Not much to say. Went to the funeral last night. Which pretty much sucked, on the account of funerals usually DO suck, because dying sucks.

Came back to the room, chilled with Sully. Went to bed, woke up with a voicemail from my mom. Bitch says it's "important." Most likely meaning she's going to hit me up for money, or ask me to move in again. Fake tears don't fucking work on me.

And now I have work. Lame. I'll probably show up to Furbes party later, because I know the little shit probably misses my presence. Later fuckers.
had some lame shit to say.

[Wednesday, June 8th, 2005
at 7:57pm
]
[ mood | contemplative ]

I'm not even going to be a fucking smartass right now. 'Cause even I'm a little shaken by this crap. Really fucking unexpected, really fucking sad. Sorry for the loss, Nelson. Yeah, for real. But it is a loss for everyone.

Yeah, look at that, me having a heart. I'm not in the mood to say anything else. This shit just makes me want to sit and think for a while.

Later losers.

had some lame shit to say.

[Monday, June 6th, 2005
at 7:00pm
]
As all my other days are lately, yesterday was fucking lame. I worked. If one more girl comes out crying after Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, I swear to fucking God, I'm going to heat the cheese up and burn them with it. So fucking annoying. Pants don't do shit like that, and girls who are like that are generally annoying.

Then I left my wonderful boyfriend a voicemail, he came by. We almost screwed in the middle of the mall, because PDA is fucking cool like that. My asshole mother called again. She's such a scumfaced bitch. The woman needs to get a damn clue. And I don't have the heart to tell him all the shit she ACTUALLY says on the phone. All she does is talk crap about him and act like some fucking concerned parent. He treats me better than she ever did.

And now, if I may ask, what is all the uproar with this new emo kid? Whenever a new one pops up, everyone fawns over him. Yeah, like that's gonna boost his shitty self-esteem. The only difference between Gordon and PETEYFUCKINGEMO is that people actually like the crossdresser. What a fucking shock. I don't like emo kids, they're such bitches. Crying is for the weak. Eyeliner is for girls. So are women's pants. Your girlfriend cheated on you. BIG FUCKING DEAL. Deal with it like a man.

I hate this fucking school.
How many retards? 6 had some lame shit to say.

[Saturday, June 4th, 2005
at 5:49pm
]
L-A-M-E?

What is? The fact that it's five fucking fifty on a Saturday and I have nothing to do. I've been up since fucking 8:00 since I had to go see the parents. Even lamer. It was just the "Alexandra, please move back in with us, we miss you." And of course, me telling them to suck an STD infested nutsack. My mom is fucking delusional if she thinks I'm going to move in with them again. Not after the last fucking three months. Screw that shit.

I almost feel bad for my dad though. I can tell the rat bastard really wants to "try" and "make up" for the last five years. I don't trust him though. So basically I woke up early to bitch at them. But they wouldn't stop fucking calling me so I needed to get rid of them somehow.

Whatever, I'm not gonna bitch and moan about this shit. If any of you want to be useful for once in your lives, you'll get in touch with me and/or entertain my bored ass. lexxi owns you is the screen name if you've suddenly forgotten it. (Doubtful, but yeah.) Message me you nasty sluts.
How many retards? 6 had some lame shit to say.

[Sunday, May 29th, 2005
at 3:11pm
]
Well it's been a fucking lifetime since I've given a substantial update. Miss me? Yeah, I know you fucking did, so I don't even have to ask.

Showed up at Kerwin's beach house party after Furbes didn't pick me up. THANKS. Whatever, Sully showed up and I had to talk to him about shit, so we pretty much ditched the party anyway. Sorry Kerwin, it wasn't all that exciting anyway. You and Jay really are Mr & Mrs. Boring.

My parents want me to move back in with them. What the fuck? My mother's such a fucking cunt. She calls me worthless and kicks me out of the fucking house, but now that she's with my dad again, I'm finally worth something? She's so full of crap, and I know she only did it since the "father" wanted her to. I had to think about it, but I decided to stay with Sully because I know he loves me and isn't gonna crap out on me like they've done consistently since I was eleven.

Damn those fucking what ifs.
So whatever. Shit's cool with me and Sully, who I seem to spend most of my time with lately. But whatever. Maybe I'll see other fuckers this week. I'm supposed to hang with Amy later. Gotta work too, so no, I will not be getting trashed with her. I'll just watch her do so and laugh my fucking ass off.

Later fuckfaces.
had some lame shit to say.

[Friday, May 27th, 2005
at 7:39pm
]
This place is so fucking lame. I haven't updated all week because you all are lame and bore the crap out of me.

Someone needs to fucking entertain me tonight.
How many retards? 1 had some lame shit to say.

[Wednesday, May 18th, 2005
at 8:56am
]
Sully's out of the hospital. Thank god, I missed the crap out of having him around.

Hung out at the room. Nothing exciting. Didn't screw even though we both wanted to. Waiting until he's recovered. OH I HAVE A HEART. Making out is good. Oh too much information for you? Oh well, don't give a shit.

Aside from that, just been going to school and work. Friggin lame. Lame. Yeah.

I'm out because I don't have jack shit to say right now.
had some lame shit to say.

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