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x miss smashley x

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new tattoo [Jan. 31st, 2007|02:52 pm]
x miss smashley x










this is the start of my horror movie sleeve..


it was done by david tower at sick boy tattoo

more pictures of tattoos he has done on my at

myspace.com/closexmyxeyes

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merry christmas! [Dec. 25th, 2006|04:52 pm]
x miss smashley x


i havent posted on this in forever..im going to start again.... merry christmas again!
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I dont sleep because I am tired, I sleep because I am weak: [Jun. 14th, 2006|11:36 pm]
x miss smashley x
Things I wrote months and months ago that I never posted. 
 
mini disclaimer:: if you think you know what this is about, guess again. It isnt exactly as obvious as you may think, and since you arent me you havent got a clue. 
 
I dont sleep because I am tired, I sleep because I am weak: 
::ashley:: 
 
Is there anyway to stop the madness in my head.as everyday passes by the further the thought of you and i seems to die the phone never rings no more messages no more i love you's no more i miss you's. just letting you know if i could go back i would kiss you a little longer and hold you a little tighter because as are moments fade to memories and turn into fairy tales of a bitter sweet mortality i increase my tolerance to not look back to not look back as my swollen eyes fill with the memories of your lips against my skin and your "heart beat in my head" the night is no longer as calming and the taste of me is no longer as satisfying my heart nothing more than a casualty of war, yet here i stand in front of you ... a victim of reality, when it is too late you will find me waiting to tell you i still care, you will find me old before my time with a bad case of bitterness...well darling are you in need of me saying any more?
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how could hell be any worse.. [Jun. 12th, 2006|01:10 am]
x miss smashley x
 I am so close to absolutly loosing it. Everything important to me is falling apart all at the same time. But of course it is, isnt life a bitch or something like that, which ultimatly means everything bad is going to happen at the same fucking time. I forgot how to be strong, but it seems to be all coming back to me. I remember 4 years ago you could through anything at me and I could care less. I've been babied too much. Do I sound as bitter as I am. You can hate me as much as you want but can you blame me? I dont blame you for why I am hurt yet, some how someway this all my fault. Don't worry I've been through worse.

my only fear

" its way to easy to fake this smile..."


This was so a big mess of 5 things that are bugging me right now, if you think this pertains to you, dont. Because it really doesnt.


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(no subject) [Jun. 10th, 2006|12:50 am]
x miss smashley x
Letter to Ashley+*-+*-+*-+*-

Ashley,
you've never read this because i've never written it in words for you. i wanted to write it in a public place so that not only you, but whoever would see it. this letter is not one of flattery or heartache, it is one of undistilled love. in this letter i want to thank you for all the things you've ever done for me and my struggle, not once have you ever turned your back or betrayed, and your love for me is unwavering. not many people can honestly say that they've found that special someone that they would want to spend thier life with, and in this letter, i express my gratitude for allowing me to find you. thank you, ashley, for being my best friend and girlfriend. this letter is a symbol of my nuetral love between you and me, that will always be with us. thank you for reading my letter.

I Love You More Than These Words Could Ever Say,

Kenney

I remember when he used to write things like that. Now all I get is " Im grouchy and you always do this, love ya bye.".. maybe it's me, maybe I am just being silly, but I'm a girl so what do you expect, I cant help that you hurt my feelings. If you really love me deal with it and at least try to make it better. I do it for you.
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armor for sleep here i come.. [May. 16th, 2006|04:55 pm]
x miss smashley x
So what is the best thing to do when you are sad... go to the video store and rent a romantic movie of course. It makes you feel even more like shit, if thats possible.
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I told you I wasnt anygood, but you said you [Apr. 20th, 2006|10:47 pm]
x miss smashley x
You have every right to be
This appalled with me
Join the club
I signed up a long time ago and I know how you feel
And when you decked me
You left me knocked out on the floor
I came to bloodied up, but you weren't around
I picked my teeth off the ground like they'd been there before



I always said that I liked the feeling of being alone and lost in a big city. well, I am over that feeling now.
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(no subject) [Apr. 2nd, 2006|02:52 pm]
x miss smashley x
Went to the park with kenney today and took a few pictures... I really liked my hair and makeup today. Vegas is a week and a half! woo hoo!! Right now I am super bored and watching spider man and waiting for kenney to get off work. :(








final count of the kittes.. two black and one orange, there will be pictures because they are super adorable!
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(no subject) [Apr. 2nd, 2006|12:53 am]
x miss smashley x
my cat is having her kittens right now! I am so so so so happy.


She has had two so far... an orange one with a brown eye patch and a black one.

I really hope the orange one is a girl because I want to keep it!!!!

I will post pictures later because they are so cute!
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with blue lips and dried eyes. [Mar. 28th, 2006|10:42 pm]
x miss smashley x
So I went to the dentist umm I have a cavity. But he said with the amount of sugar I eat even with me brushing in the morning and I night ( like I do) it couldnt be avoided. Umm what else oh yea I get to have another mouth surgery. woo.not.

Umm I went to the doctor because of my back again and I have to go to pain management 3 times, and each time I go I have to have an epidural. No I am not having a baby.

Hmm in two weeks Kenney and I are going to Las Vegas for 3 or 4 days!! My Nanny is sick so I am going to see her and see the rest of the family :).


It was raining all day and 30 miles away a tornado touched down!!!. I was inside all day cuz umm it was raining and there was a tornado watch so I did the super cool thing and took pictures! 






ex I oh

smashley
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