THE LIFE AND TIMES OF FRANTIC CHAV!
At the age of 1, he was voted "Future King of The Chav's" in a local beauty contest.
FrAnTiC conducted their first armed burglary at the age of 6. _fiend</strong> was most proud!
By the age of 15 "head lice" had become as common a phrase as "get the fuck out of here you scally tart!"
In a desperate attempt to escape the dole queue FrAnTiC secured _fiend</strong>'s house on a horse racing bet. The horse fell at the first hurdle. In 2026, FrAnTiC was brutally assaulted in a nightclub after attempting to steal a lighter from a bouncer's pocket.
FrAnTiC was arrested for cruelty to animals after attempting to glue a robin red breast to a bird feeder by its wing. Knowing how to celebrate the New Year in style, FrAnTiC held a fireworks display in their front garden. Being a completely awful shot he misfired a rocket which crashed through their living window, causing a huge inferno which took out their home.
The ghost of _____stuntpilot</strong> came back and visited FrAnTiC whilst he was at the fairground, lodging their head in the candy floss machine! FrAnTiC never came back out!