|worst day of my life?
this is kind of a clusterfuck, im sorry.
tuesday night: i have some kind of epiphany and came to terms with shannon and chad being good friends, so i invited shannon out to in-n-out to just chill and talk about stuff. it all came about because nina messaged me randomly, nina is shannons old roommate, she moved out after fall quarter. since nina is also shannons friend, i had to tell her everything in a non-shit-talking way like i usually told everyone things, haha. at the end of it, i felt really good about everything and decided to do what i already told you about. so we go to in-n-out and we talk about school and stuff, just friendly talk, i never brought up chad once. i went to sleep that night feeling so happy to finally have this load lifted off my shoulders, and that me and shannon could actually make it work as friends. funny how fast things change isnt it.
thursday night: my friends john, amanda, shannon, and chad went to a party. now ever since we broke up, shannon has been in chad's room and has been his shadow, following him everywhere. too much has happened between them to write about it all, the basic idea is that chad liked her before we even started dating. they both said nothing was happening between them and shannon said chad was not her type and she would never date him.
i know how shannon gets when she's drunk, and i knew something was going to happen between them that night. so even before they left to go to the party i started feeling depressed so i took a drive, my original plan was to drive up to the top of the hill and shoot some night shots of campus, but the gates were locked, so i decided to try to find the road that all the houses are on past the 10 that we can see from school. i succeeded, but the view was shit, so i came back to school. on the way back john calls me from the party asking if I can pick him and amanda up because chad and shannon wanted to leave. i said sure. i ask john where the house is, but he's drunk, so i just pretend to understand and then hang up. when i get back to school, i knock on chads door, no answer. i call him up to get directions to the house. i ask him where he's at since he's not in his room. he tells me that he's taking shannon home because she has to take her dogs out since her parents are out of town. this is about 1:30 in the morning, shannon lives in huntington beach, 45 minutes from school. i ask chad directions to the house, and he hands the phone off to shannon. shannon sounds overly happy (drunk, note: NOT SICK AT ALL) and talks about the party for a bit, then hands the phone back to chad to tell me directions. by this time i already found the frat house on the internet and have directions. i hang up with them not feeling better about this whole situation at all.
after i get back from picking john and amanda up, amanda tells me what she's discovered about chad and shannon. she promised me she'd do some detective work. she says that they were dancing together, (i have always hated the term "freak dancing" but thats what they were doing), when they stopped dancing shannon gave chad a kiss on the cheek. shannon also said that her and chad have made out before, and she has liked chad more than a friend since 2 weeks after we broke up because she thinks that she can confide in him. this hit me like a train. amanda left, john had already passed out drunk on the futon. i lied down in my bed and could not sleep at all. so i went down the hall and talked to rich about the whole thing. he told me that he was going to chads house for the weekend, and before chad left with shannon to take her home chad talked to rich and said "shannon is feeling really sick so im going to take her home, i'll see you tomorrow morning." now why would he drive her 45 minutes to an empty house if she was feeling sick and they were already at the dorms where shannon has medicine and a bed?? i told rich that i had talked to an overly energized and NOT SICK shannon as they were on the way to her house. we were both confused. i came to the conclusion that i needed to talk to both of them, so i texted them both "the 3 of us need to talk."
i lay back down at about 4 in the morning, my stomach hurts, all i can think about is a horrible mental picture of chad and shannon making out. all i remember is laying there with my eyes closed thinking about this whole situation and looking over at the clock, there was one point in the night where it moved ahead more than 30 minutes at a time. i think i got an hour of sleep total. at 9:30 i decided to get up and drink some water. i felt like complete shit, my stomach hurt and i felt like i had to throw up. i knew my stomach hurting was due to hunger so i tried to find the most bland food i had. i took a bite of a blueberry muffin, and immediately felt the throw-up coming on. i opened the window and threw up 1/8th of a blueberry muffin and all the water than i just drank. i drank some more water and it came right back up. i laid back down and dont really remember if i got any sleep at all, but around 10:30 shannon texts me asking "about what?"
to be continued.