||[22 Jun 2006|11:52pm]
hows life niggas and bitches?
lmao soooo works still good im still enjoying it, which is weird i thought id hate it by now and already missed like 5 days, but i only missed one day which is CRAZY seeing as though i skipped school like a million times sophmore year, the last time i was in high school. And i love almost all the people i work with. i see alotta people i havent seen in forever
the whole college thing seems a million miles away though. i sadly want to go now, get something under my belt so i wont be stuck in brockton my whole life but thats not working out, i could go and i want to but i cannot afford it on baylios salary lmao trying to get a car and whatnot. Guess im settling with me G.e.d. for a little while.
but lifes okay lol i went to the beach on saturday and sunday with dacia. tuesday i layed out, im lovin the weather even tho i have no ac upstairs and its wicked humid and really bad for my hair!
||[25 Apr 2006|06:35pm]
some people dont like it
cause you hang out in the streets
but your my boyfriend
you've always been here for me
who wants to go to the movies with me? i havent been there in so long, i need to go on like an actual date i miss it.
anyways so great news! ya my cells went from abnormal to high grade in a month! that's wats up nigga no not really.
but what pisses me off is that my bitch ass gynecologist hits me up at like 930 in the morning and shes all happy and perky telling me about how im 17 and gonna die from fucking cancer nosa it aint even that serious itll be ill cause ill be one of the firsts to see jesse again.
nah idk how i feel about this whole situation like i bawled and i didnt and i accept it and i dont its basically too much to even deal with,
but works good i like it alot i got 20 dollars in tips in an hour and i DEFINATELY fucked something from every order up lol thank god they dont tip after they get there food lol but my boss was right if i take the male customers and he takes the bitches we make more tips than the other way around, lol he thinks hes a pimp though
so ya im just sitting here thinking im black watching 106th and park like im still living at stanleys or some shit lol but im just thinking about how FUCKED my life is. Like when i straight SWEAT some dude, i cheat on him so he dont hurt me first.
i talked to an old friend who w/e we had our share of problems but she was there for me when i needed her this morning and shes probably the last person i would think of to be there, and it just goes to show you that like no matter how many grimey fuckers there are in brockton there still are genuinely good people hidden somewhere lol
but yea so DICKHEAD ((previously mentioned)) yaaa his boy hits me up... haha so im interested, not even like that i should just make him my boy and chill with him to piss that cocksucker off... sounds like a cute lil plan
ive been staying in alot lately its kinda cute tho like i do my nails listen to the radio nd do like corny things but i gotta go act black til i go out soooo leave me love<3
|wow does anyone remember me?
||[10 Apr 2006|06:17pm]
Well, honestly it doesnt matter if anyone remembers me because this entry's soul purpose is to get some shit out there that should be.
First off, my best friend for the past couple years and friend of 6 years is not really quite my friend at all anymore. Basically something real bad happened in my life that should've never had the chance to happen but what can i say? my head was up my ass. So whatever this terrible thing happened and i confided in my best friend couple weeks later i find out she tells this girl who honestly everyone knows has the biggest fucking mouth in the world. Just so everyone knows trust can be everything in a relationship, even if it's not it could ruin a whole relationship and it doesnt have to be a boyfriend. Remember one thing though! people are all we have in this world... when you find one that really means something to you realize what your doing before you let gossip end a strong friendship real quick.
Sooooooooo about my head being up my ass! a boy, a little fucking boy did something wrong to me a few years ago. so ya if you dont know me and if your reading this you probably dont, i'm tapped in my motha fucking head for real like i love me some drama and ill admit that. So i let him come back, we were just friends but i forgot how much a "friend" can hurt you. i'm not that kinda person i dont let niggas hurt me BUT EVERYONES A FUCKING HYPOCRITE, even miss mary. In the long run i straight fuccckkkeeeddddd myself over. And i could hurt him just as badly but for once im just gonna let it slide and be friends and play nicely - to a certain degree.
So it's almost been a while since jesse died. they say that shit gets easier and i can tell u first fucking hand it really dont, i dont think there will ever be a day that goes by i dont wanna cry about it or call one of my friends to talk about it. And i dont think i'll ever miss him any less. Sure it's less dramatic now but that love don't go away and i never want it to. I think that when people say it'll get better or it'll be fine they either dont know what the fuck they're talking about or they have gone through what i went through and realized that a loved ones death isn't ALWAYS going to be a terrible thing, when i think about jesse now i dont think right away about his death, i think about where he is now and how he's taking care of me and i can talk to him any time of the day i want.
And for anyone that's gonna read this and hate or talk shit.... dont waste your time it aint phazin me and to tell you the truth ill admit me and jesse were on bad terms before he left, but if you were me, which you are not, you'd understand until than talk all the shit you want without any knowledge.
and just to put it out there.... i am marry ty hunt.
i got dibbs and he's agreed to it already.
also gotta do a shoutout reallllllllllllll quick
now for the good shit...
HAPPY FUCKING 18th BDAY AMANDA DECELLE!!! if i cant buy cigarettes lol which im sure will happen, seeing as tho we live in this lovely city thats down with selling crack pipes and materials etc out of convenient store, ill hit you up!!
my life is fucking ill right now for real okay this is coming from Miss "knows how to fuck her life up" yea so tell me, i got my GeD fucking good enough diploma for me, that shits sending me to college along with some rich grandparents. I got my first job today was my first day come visit me ill hook it up wit some food. I love my job to death its at the mall so i see everyone and now everyone knows i got off my lazy ass and got a job. Also, i will be putting my BEAUTIFUL mustang under my name asap. AND TO TOP IT ALL OFF i moved on from mr dickhead couldnt give less of a fuck seeing as though i met the sweetest sexiest mother fucker in brockton. For real like i've had dude treat me all sweet and whatnot and they fuck me over, but after being with SO many i can see right through it, i knew i was getting fucked over the last COUPLE times and i knew i was getting fucked over and my head tampered with but i let it happen. But for real this time like it aint even like that he is honest beyond belief even when i dont wanna hear it and hes on some other shit with him compliments lol like for real this nigga knows what i wanna hear lol but ya fallin....
usually, i'd be pretty pissed right now cause everytime i start likin someone i hate it and i love my single life, i've been single for almost a year and ill admit i love being about to go about my buisness handlin my shit without knowing to ansewer to. But idk something about this nigga for realllllllllllll
and thats my quick summary of my life right now... * kisses*
|lmao i love this... thanks chrissy<3
||[22 Mar 2005|08:23pm]
 Reply with your Full name and I will write something about you.
 I will then tell you what song/BAND reminds me of you.
 Next, I will tell you who you remind me of, celebrity/animated or otherwise.
 Last, I will try to name a single word that best describes you.
 Put this in your journal.
||[03 Mar 2005|10:11am]
Okay i had a really bad dream last night it was about the only boy i've ever loved hooking up with one of my friends... i dont know which one though. So i got up this mornin at 63o n got in the shower, i have bad anxiety nd i could feel it in my stomach so well i was in the shower i got really hot and really dizzy then i started panting like i couldnt breathe and i couldnt catch my breathe, i HATE anxiety attacks, so i went back to bed not going to school but COULDNT sleep which i wouldve loved to have done.
i hate not going to school no ones home NOT EVEN AMANDA! and im stuck here maybe all day im not sure, nd it looks so nice out the skies actually really bright seeing as tho we just got a ft of snow but its fuckin freezing.
i fucking hate my love life...it sucks alotta dick. i think it's trying to make up for the fact that i dont suck dick =/
||[02 Mar 2005|03:37pm]
Name: Mary Erin
Drug of choice: Extacy
When did u start usin drugs?: 13
Why?: it was uhmmm "cool" ya that's different?
What was your fisrt drug?: Weed
why that one?: easiest to find
What was it like for you?: a fucking video game the first time
would you change anything about that first experience?: hell fuckin no it was hilarious
Ever been caught by anyone?:no not really except cops
if so, what happend?: stomped it or dumped it nothing serious
Ever been to rehab or an mental institution?: yes and yes
if so, then for what?: Depression Bipolar and Heroine
Would you ever or do you plan to stop using drugs?: nah not really i love drugs<3
if so then explain why?: I LOVE DRUGS!
*::Have you or would you::*
do Pot?: helllll yesss
Do heroin?: used to
Acid?: want to cant find any
mushrooms?: HELL YEAAA
extacy?: my favorite.... fucking love of my life best feeling in the world
Mescaline?: wtf is that?
Meth?: id try it, we dont have much of that though
DXM?: WANNA try it real bad
Drug movie: thirteen
Stoner: MEGHAN YOUNG!
Music to listen to while stoned: the game - 5o <3
activity to do while stoned: chill
Favorite person to be with while stoned: MEG
favorite munchiez snack: blue doritos
*::Where do you stand::*
should people with kids do drugs?: sure as long as they can handle it
is there too young an age to start trying drugs?: yes 12 and younger
How would you classify when someone has a Drug PROBLEM?: if their day depends on it
Should marijuana be legalized? why or why not?: HELL YA! its alotta less dangerous than alchol and alcohols fucking legal
Are there any bad drugs?: heroine i would personally say from experience and crack
what drug if any do u think is the most dangerous or that you would never try?: nuthing i wouldn't try once lol
||[23 Feb 2005|10:22am]
I went to my babys house yesterday around 3-4 and i got drunk at 5 lol took some of my moms captain morgans... it's my favorite. Wat else can u do to cover up the fact that u robbed someone for like half of their bottle?? any suggestions...
Ya so last night we got a forty. of that yayo<3
i did a couple lines w/my baby.
Came in at like 130 cuz it was time for the little kid to go to bed. I come in wide the fuck away,had a nice little conversation with my dad. Then i went upstairs and went through maddddd shit thats just sat in my room collecting dust forever. Mad it look all empty, so now i gotta reorganize my room, move shit around and watnot... idk wat i should do. I do have two rooms.
Anyways... ya Mego's a fucking P I M P thats wassup girly! i taught my bitch well.. she's turning into me!!!! All these boys... and on top of it all shes becoming a seriously big bitch - just like me =) im so proud<3 love you meg BFF!!!
||[22 Feb 2005|11:41am]
sooooo the past couple night all we've been doin is drivin around, chillen with my babys meghan ashley and derek... nd u can't forget dacey of course. ItZ NoT ThAt I CaNt StOp ItZ ThAt I WoNt StOp Yaaa we've just been drivin around smokiinnnngggg and bein lol dumbasses. Meghans a PIMP!!! haha yaa so last night we're leavin johnny's and when we were going in Dacey slipped on the ice... So whatever we went in chilled for a couple then we bounced... meghan straight busted her fuckin ASS!!! it was awesome... i almost died. Then dacey helps her up but he's talkin shit so of course my girl handles that.. she fucken wraps her arms around his legs and flips him in the snow seeing as though she's already all wet.
So yea... this vacation is straight blunt smokin vaca, awwhhh how i love weed<33
||[08 Feb 2005|07:28pm]
Greg will be visiting WXXL 106.7 FM in Orlando and chatting on air with Chad Pitt and promoting the Planet Hollywood event.
Don't forget to come and see Greg in O-Town this weekend!!
wow that goes to show you that false advertisment is really on some other shit. That Greg was in Dream Street like 3 years ago, i was and will admit to being an addict and i still get a "newsletter" in my email like once a week. i though that shit was hilarious Chad pitt?? lmao sound like anyone. i laughed my ass off but could've died wen i read IN otown instead of AND otown.
||[29 Jan 2005|01:54pm]
THE BABY IS FUCKING COMING REALLLLLLLLL SOON!!!!
Amy is ready to pop ahhh im so excited he's gonna be soooooooo little<33
||[29 Jan 2005|01:44pm]
Yea last night fucken sucked alottttttttttaaaaa dick. Im pumped to get shitfaced and party tonight though. AND!!!! Me julia n some of jesses boys are going to foxboro tomorow morning for the Kickoff party at the stadium there.
Yea so i saw jesse for the first time in a month without seeing or talking to him. And he didnt say one fucking word to me. that's nice right? way to be friends at least what the fuck..
he got MAD skinny and his hairs long lol i dont know i was fucken bullshit about the how fucken court thing yesterday sooo i had shit to deal with. fuck it aint shit i cant do nething about it thanks to someone who ran their mouth wen it wasn't their place to but i woulda told him n it woulda been the same way anyways
i've got stains on my t-shirt and i'm the biggest flirt<3
||[25 Dec 2004|02:09pm]
my baby got me the prettiest ring i've ever seen for xmas, it's white gold and gold cuz i got wg n g earrings for my confermation. so its two bands and the bottom on crossses in the middle and goes into a little heart with a diamond in the middle and two diamonds on each side on the heart. And my mother got me a matching necklace, gold with a gold heart and three diamonds on the left side. i didnt get my jessica simpson cd though!!! HEATED.
... but i got my hubby and two days ago i really didnt think i was still gonna have him. im so lucky to have him, he spoils me to fucken death.
well my dads parents are here and we're waiting for my moms mom and her two brothers to get here, seeing as tho my aunt (my moms sister) and her twin 6 years olds and my uncle arent coming, like usual. but every year they've had christmas at there house we've gone. it's always a big dispute over where everyone goes and this is the only year we've ever had it hear.
neways.... i think tonight gonna be cute. gonna chill hea, open presents, eat dinner, wait for my baby to get home from middleboro and then we might go out with chris n alex to the movies idk yet but we're gonna try to do something
||[23 Dec 2004|02:36pm]
i've kissed someone;
on the cheek.
on the lips.
on their hands or fingers.
in my room.
in their room.
of the same sex.
of the opposite sex.
younger than me.
older than me.
with jet black hair.
with curly hair. <---a girl
with blonde hair & blue eyes.
with flaming red hair.
with straight hair.
smaller/shorter than me.
bigger/taller than me.
with a lip ring.
who was drunk.
who was high.
who I had just met.
who was homosexual.
who I didn't really want to kiss.
on a holiday.
who was going out with someone else.
who was going out with someone close to me.
who was my good friend's brother or sister.
who had been/is in jail.
in a graveyard.
at a show/concert.
at the beach.
in a pool, jacuzzi, or some type of water
who was legally too young/old for me to have sex with.
with dyed hair.
with a shaved head.
who was/is my good friend.
who was/is in a band.
who has tattoos.
who is of a completely different race than me.
in the rain.
in another continent besides where I was born.
with an accent.
with an std.
on a boat.
in a car/taxi/bus.
on a plane.
at the circus/carnival.
with a missing body part.
in the movies.
What Will _bitch Get ?
|Xmas pressie predictor|
|Big wooly jumper knitted by|| emerleez|
|Pair of Socks from|| megz_|
|Bottle of Whiskey from|| __finale|
|Cd from|| crayola_skies|
|Something Cuddly from|| _sweetsarah_|
|Something Intoxicating from|| ashy_baby|
|Something Silly from|| wp_queen|
|Something Funny from|| chancy_lady|
|Lump of coal from|| ashleydanielle|
|Something Pretty from|| nikki_babe|
|Something Shiny from|| _36degrees|
|Something Naughty from || allinator|
|Something Smelly from|| iluvgreenfundip|
|Something Breakable from|| _bitch|
|Something Useful from|| _bitch|
|Something not useful from|| wp_queen|
|The Black and Decker Tool Kit from|| emerleez|
|Livejournal account from|| ashleydanielle|
|The Make-up Bag from|| nikki_babe|
|Stack of DVDs from|| allinator|
|Something Geeky from|| __finale|
|your the right kinda wrong
||[26 Oct 2004|04:12pm]
okay so yea nicole gets mad at me because i said wen she fights with her sister its annoying. I have no problem with it but you have a loud family and wen im on the phone with you and you fucking scream in my ear it's absolutely impossible for me not to be annoyed. Most of the time it's funny but not talking to me because i was telling my father is pretty pathetic but w/e.
Anyways, i saw the grudge the other day, it was madddd scary. I saw it agen last night w/chris and alex. Somethings going aroundddd.... hmmmm :/ doesnt bother me though =) im stayin out of that whole mess. Alicia keeps fucking calling my boyfriend and it didnt bother me at first but it's fucken gettin to me cuz it's just straight up disrespect directly to me. And i dont want any of her respect i'd love her to show me a BIG sign of disrespect so i have a reason to fight her. But i dont have one as of now so it's not my biggest concern. But of course my loud mouth is gonna say something to her.
Jesse isn't gone, that was my biggest concern and now i dont have to worry about it im madddd releived. i love this boy, oh gawwddd. He's so sweet to me!!!! and we beat the shit out of each other. lol We're both gonna have some serious scars. He already does im just waiting for me to get some. His back is completely torn up w/scabs and scars. I've gotten bruises but wen we fuck around we end up hittin each other hard lol i love it tho cuz unlike my brother i can hit someone n not feel bad.
alicias a bitch that runs her lip and has nothing to back it up, she wouldnt do shit if her fucken life depended on it.
||[17 Oct 2004|02:46pm]
13 random things you like:
2. being with my baby
4. the nights wen everyone stays out real late
5. not sleeping alone
6. my babys
8. making ignorant people feel like assholes
9. Rave Hairspray
11. getting my hair done/dyed/cut
12. big expensive suv's
13. the sopranos
4. Mean Girls
5. the punisher
6. walking tall
7. Jersey Girl
9. home movies
10 physical traits of yours:
1. my boobs
2. the color of my eyes
3. nice skin
5. MY HAIR
6. skinny hands/fingers
7. muscular legs
8. tiny thighs
9. i dont grow body hair like ever lol
10. no real bad scars
9 good friends:
3. Amanda D
4. Amanda M
5. My Nsyde Girlyz
9. The Captain
8 favorite foods/drinks:
1. chicken salad
2. french fries
3. chicken fingers
4. honey bbq anything
5. diet coke
6. captain morgans
7 hot celebrities:
1. Angelina Jolie
2. Jessica Simpson
3. Pamela Anderson
4. Steven from Laguna Beach
5. Jimmy Fallon
6 things that annoy you:
1. ignorant people
2. people pointing out my flaws like i dont stress them enough
4. shirts that stretch out an hour after u put them on
5. chipped nail polish
6. awkward silence
5 ideal jobs:
1. Married into the mafia
2. Drug councilor
3. talent scout
5. Beauty supply tester lady
4 shows you watch:
1. Laguna Beach
2. Red Sox / Pats
3. He says/She says rw v.s. Rr challenge
3 things you'd never do:
1. od - i know my limit
2. Call the police on my kids
3. let a guy hit me in my face
2 kisses you've enjoyed:
1. Jesse (battery operated tongue lol)
1 thing you can't wait to do:
1. Move to Aruba
||[02 Sep 2004|04:34pm]
Today was kinda straight seeing as though it was my first day back at schol since march. i know everyone got out in june but i left bhs in february then went to a different school and got kicked outta there in march.
Everyone thinks im like a real good kid now, i dont exactly know why but it's kinda ill. They like write me passes for no reason and get me outta trouble. My classes are straight except for my lunch kinda sucks imma hafta try a different building tomorow.
this weekend i'm going to get my hair done. alll bleach basically white with a blondish color. i got real bad roots and my colors fading im sick of this shit. Imma get it done at hollywood. And go on a little shopping spree...look for a job and maybe get my permit depending on how much time i have. sept 9th i sign up for drivers ed.
but i gotta go clean my room some dss people are comen to the houseeee.... nicole wen u get home call me i wanna know the next tyme ur goin to the gym i neeeedddd tooooo gooooo - u looked so cute today! lol
<33 The Biiaatccchhhh**
||[02 Sep 2004|04:17pm]
TEN Things You Did
01. Went to Aruba
02. Drunk swimming<3
03. Partied in Old Orchard Beach
04. got drunk every night with amanda
05. robbed a car - lmfao long story
06. saw jamie graduate
07. was really proud of derek for alot of reasons
08. Met madddd people
09. Went to the beach ALOT
10. pulled like 20 all nighters
NINE Favorite Bands/Singers of the Summer
01. Jessica Simpson
03. Terror Squad
04. Mobb Deep
07. Maria Mena
08. whoever sings the pina colada song lol
EIGHT Places You Ate At
02. the divi
03. yoohoo's in maine...
04. subway in aruba
SEVEN Things that Annoyed You
01. Not being able to smoke
03. getting in so much trouble
04. didnt get a job
05. regretting the night before
06. the boy lol ily tho
07. getting tons of clothes but none i could wear to school
SIX Things You Bought
01. Jewelry in Maine
02. Jewelry in Aruba
03. Jewelry in New hampshire
04. a pipe with two people having sex on it
05. wayyyyy too muchhhhh half pints n pints
06. tons of slutty summer clothes
FIVE Things You Accomplished
01. Stopped smokin weed and doin drugs
02. finally got a bunch of tongue rings
03. saw my babys ALOT
04. got away from the neighborhood for a while - not really an accomplishment
05. Went a lonnnngggg time without sex
FOUR Movies You Saw
01. A Cinderella Story - brought my 6 yr olds
THREE Things You Wish You Did
01. got my permit
02. lost weight
03. went to kelly's bf's bday party
TWO Rules You Broke
01. Drove amandas unregistered car wen we were both drunk lol
02. Drank (alot) in aruba
ONE Thing You LOVED About This Summer
01. Partying my assssssssssss offfff <3333
||[02 May 2004|06:06pm]
fuck it lol life sucks bottom line its all drama n shit u cant deal with u get tired of it theas no point in "Tryin to get thru it" if wen u get thru it u gotta deal with more bullshit
he thinks im a whore. and that i hook up with everyone im alone with.
apparently he doesnt love me like he says he is. cause if he did he'd try a little harder to not listen to everyone else but me. Or try harder to be with me. But i cant tell him any of this, i cant tell him one tiny thing if im not tryin to defend myself because he'll take it as me tryin to make him feel bad. But wat he doesnt understand is that wen we're not happy he makes me feel worse than i ever have, dont get me wrong, wen we're doing good he makes me feel like im on top of the world and nothing can touch me or break us. But knowing that he's gettin tired of being with me fucken kills me inside.
and slowly im dying inside which means it's not too long before i die on the outside.