?

Log in

No account? Create an account

::;x · MiSZ · POLLiTO

Recent Entries · Archive · Friends · Profile

* * *
so its the 4th, and i had a BBQ. nothing out this world. me and my grl got a tad tipsy. aint shit else to do these days. especially with me being ahh BLEH about shit. i like luis, i really do. but in all honesty i'm starting to get the idea, he just isn't that intereseted in me as i am him. i just don't get the reponse from him i did in the beginning. he never calls, never text me and we hardly see eachother. i mean i like not seeing him all the time, but more then once a week would be good. =( i dunno. today he called me and hung up. which obviously means he really didn't want to talk to me. so whatever i called back, and all he said was "i hate fireworks, its so stupid" just when i was going to invite him to go with me to see em. guess not. and im gonna go see'em with my grl, and she went and invited her ex. like WHY? now i get to be a third. i hate that. like great they'll be all over one another and i'll just be...there.

lets see how the night ends. im sure not all that well.
Current Mood:
blank blank
Current Music:
tell me - smilesz and southstar
* * *
  • Thanksgiving to tomorrow. I hate turkey but I love pernier. (sp?)
  • I got a B- is AP English, very proud of myself, just not sure if I deserved it. But Definitly not going to argue it.
  • I am so bored that I took an hour nap, and watched Six Feet Under, and I'm about to do it again.
  • me and him* aren't doing so hott.
  • Some guy is kinda feelin me, but I'm not sure if I wanted to play him* our because just because I don't trust him w/ the females doesn't mean I want to give him a reason not to trust me
  • My celly is broken and I hate this dumb phone. I want a pink razor.
  • I'm in the mood for some good sancocho.
  • I want a car. I don't have my lisence yet, but I will next month and I need me a car to practice in. MY OWN CAR!!!

 

  • Not when I just found out that he* called/text the grl he used to mess with. WHY WOULD HE CALL HER. she said she aint pick up. (and she's 4 months pregnant). haha
    Current Mood:
    bored bored
    Current Music:
    The Tara Show
  • * * *

    It's ironic how two people can do the exact same thing to a person, and that very same person takes it differently. Changes there reaction for the other person. Even though you did the exact same thing as the other one. How people perseve things differently just because who it may come from. I never saw myself as a mean person. A bitch, yes, maybe sometimes. But mean, never. Not a jerk, or an asswhole. I have a decent persona, most of the time. But somehow, this same person, views me as just that. A jerk, bitch, asswhole. Whatever it maybe. And no matter how nice i am, or thoughtful, or just decent, they never have ANYTHING nice to say about me. If you ask them to describe me, negative words always come out of their mouth. Even though they always say it playfully, they always do it. And sometimes I wonder, just becaues you said it playfully, do you honestly think that about me? Like why can't for once you say "what are you doing puddy pie" or something ridiculous and obscure. Something over exagerant. Why do I always have to be percieved with such negativity. I don't know if I am just blowing this out of proportion. But never once, have I ever felt that people think so badly about me until this one person, had not one positive comment to go along with the rest of the sentence to me.

    just a thought running through my mind.

    Current Mood:
    curious curious
    Current Music:
    nothingness
    * * *

    I been thinking about you alot lately. I miss you terribly. I don't show it much because I know that you don't want me to miss you. I know you don't. I remeber all the little goofy things we used to do with eachother. The waterfights, the walking in the park, the walks to the bus stop. The basketball games, the boyfriends and girlfriends. The singing really loud. Our first kisses. I remeber you were at my first kiss with louie, and as maria held our heads together, you counted 5 seconds. lol

    I remeber waiting at the corner for you in the snow, late December. I waited for a long time. I missed the bus waiting for you. And the next day, I waited again at the corner til it was just too late for me to keep standing there in the cold. I don't remeber exactly how many days I waited til I decided to walk to your house and see what was up. All I remeber was your mom telling me you didn't live there anymore.

    I remeber you and me spending all whole summers together. Playing outside with Lacey and Nikira and Christina. How we used to play the mystery game and see who killed who. And I remeber you and me walking home and you pushed me into a building lobby and asked me if I ever tap kissed anyone and I said no so you kissed me with your juicy lips.

    I was so excited when you came to visit me before my birthday. I think I woke everyone up when I screamed you name. And I remeber hugging you and not wanting to let you go away again. I didn't want to let you go. You showed me your blood beads and you little stories. I told you about my new boyfriend (jon). I'll never forget that night.

    I remeber how you never wanted to come inside my house cause you were so afraid of my father. You said he looked like a convict. I had never laughed so hard in my life.

    I don't know if you ever hear me when I talk to you. But I do check in alot. I like the think that you couldn't tell any of us what was going on. It's more comforting that way. I never had a best friend like you. We never fought, just cause we knew tomorrow we would be laughing again at the bus stop. How you just had to hook me up with Kenneth when I saw him. How you and Zakiya were boyfriend and girlfriend and she took your green heart lolipop and you got so mad. How you and Maria got married and you got on the bus with a suit and showed me that 25 cent ring with a green platic jewel.

    I love you so much, and I never will forget you. I can't wait to be together again. It was always about you and me. And it always will. Hope your sitting reading this as I type it. I love you. Byee

    There are times when I look above and beyond
    There are times when I feel your love around me baby
    I'll never forget my baby
    I'll never forget you

    There are times when I look above and beyond
    There are times when I feel your love around me baby
    I'll never forget my baby
    When I feel that I don't belong
    Draw my strength
    From the words when you said
    Hey it's about you baby
    Look deeper inside you baby

    (Bridge)
    I dream about us together again
    When I want us together again baby
    I know we'll be together again 'cause

    (Chorus)
    Everywhere I go
    Every smile I see
    I know you are there
    Smilin' back at me
    Dancin' in moonlight
    I know you are free
    I can see your star
    Shinin' down on me

    (Together again ooh )
    Good times we'll share again
    (Together again ooh )
    Makes me wanna dance
    (Together again ooh)
    Say it loud and proud
    (Together again ohh)
    All my loves for you

    Always been a true angel to me
    Now above
    I can't wait for you to wrap your wings around me baby
    Wrap them around me baby
    Sometimes hear you whisperin'
    No more pain
    No worries will you ever see now baby
    I'm so happy for my baby

    (Bridge)
    I dream about us together again
    When I want us together again baby
    I know we'll be together again 'cause

    (Chorus)
    Everywhere I go
    Every smile I see
    I know you are there
    Smilin' back at me
    Dancin' in moonlight
    I know you are free
    I can see your star
    Shinin' down on me

    (Together again ooh )
    Good times we'll share again
    (Together again ooh )
    Makes me wanna dance
    (Together again ooh)
    Say it loud and proud
    (Together again ohh)
    All my loves for you

    There are times when I look above and beyond
    There are times when I feel you smile upon me baby
    I'll never forget my baby
    What'll I give just to hold you close
    As on earth
    In heaven we will be together baby
    Together again my baby

    (Chorus)
    Everywhere I go
    Every smile I see
    I know you are there
    Smilin' back at me
    Dancin' in moonlight
    I know you are free
    I can see your star
    Shinin' down on me

    (Chorus)
    Everywhere I go
    Every smile I see
    I know you are there
    Smilin' back at me
    Dancin' in moonlight
    I know you are free
    I can see your star
    Shinin' down on me

    RIP BOOTY

    1988-2004

    Current Mood:
    indescribable indescribable
    Current Music:
    together again on repeat
    * * *

    sorry i havent updated in 2 weeks.i've been on vacation. I went to NC. Then I went to NYC for a while. I've got pics to prove it too!! I've been so depressed lately too. Not sure y just am. here are some pics. enjoy

    NC nd NYCCollapse )

    * * *
    * * *

                                 

    • This is a Friends Only journal.
    • If you wish to be added, comment me and give me some info about you.
    • If your added it's because I want to add you, if not...well I think thats self explanitory.
    * * *

    its over. point blank.

    i don't need you. i heard enough. Not only did i play stupid.

    not only did i make up stories for your mystery disapearences.

    I LOOK LIKE THE STUPID ONE FOR YOU!!!

    HAVE HER. GO SEE YOUR BABY `SMILEZ`.

    SHE MUST BE IMPORTANT IF YOU SAVED HER TEXT MESSAGES.

    SHE MUST BE IMPORTANT IF YOU GO SEE HER IN MY.

    SHE MUST BE IM PORTANT TO TALK 2 EVERY NIGHT.

    THE NY TEDDYBEAR. THE NY KEYCHAIN. THE NY SHOT GLASSES.

    THE TRIPS TO NY. IT ALL FUCKIN MAKES SENCE. AND I DON'T

    EVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN. I DONT WANT TO FEEL THE WAY I DID THAT NIGHT.

    NEVER!! 

    no moreCollapse )

    Current Mood:
    angry angry
    Current Music:
    we belong together - mariah carey (NO WE DONT)
    * * *

    im not happy. im never happy. behind my smile...im not happy.

    i realized alot last night. that mayb we really just were NOT meant for eachother now.

    maybe he is supposed to not come back. maybe i really am not good enough.

    that's what he says, that i don't know how to treat him.

    is that the same as saying "your not good enough?"

    How wasn't i good enough. I threw you suprise parties.

    I took you to the wax museum for your birthday.

    I took you with me to my christmas party in NY with my family.

    I spent every thanksgiving with you. I spent new years with you.

    I took care of you when your back hurt.

    I took care of you when you got jumped. I let you go clubbing.

    I spent my every day with you when you asked.

    I let you pick the movies. I helped you study for your permit.

    I tried to put a smile on your face when you were mad at the world.

    I stayed up late to do your projects. I stayed up taking out your braids.

    I did everything in my power to make you happy...and all you can say is

    "I can't be with someone with you, you don't know how to treat me right."

    I no I did bad things. I no I kissed someone else in the beginning.

    I no I danced with someone in front of you and I made you mad.

    I no that I picked on your every move. I know I accused you of being with Monica.

    I no that I wasn't perfect. I know i have growing up to do.

    That's why they made second chances.

    And all you can say is "you don't know how to treat me right"

    If I could erase all of my mistakes...would you come back?

    If I was perfect, would you want me then?

    Current Mood:
    confused confused
    Current Music:
    My mistakes - 112
    * * *

     

    very trueCollapse )

    Current Mood:
    contemplative contemplative
    Current Music:
    cuentame - daddy yankee
    * * *
    post this in your live journal in a public post with anonymous comments turned on.
    anyone who reads this should comment anonymously with answers to the survey.
    please by VERY honest! you're anonymous, so it's not like i can find out what you said!


    1. What do you think of my journal name?
    What does my live journal name tell you about me?
    2. What do you think of my icon?
    What does my icon tell you about me?
    3. Do you like my user info page?
    4. Just by reading my interests would you think I was someone you would want to get to know?
    5. Do we have any of the same interests?
    6. What do you think of my picture?
    7. What do you think of the number of friends I have on live journal?
    8. What is the best thing about my live journal?
    9. What is the worst thing about my live journal?
    10. If you have read any of my posts, what do you think of them?
    11. Is my writing good?
    12. Are my posts interesting?
    13. What annoys you about my live journal?
    14. Do I use live journal cut too often, just enough, or not enough?
    15. Does my journal need more or less drama surrounding it?
    16. What am I too obsessed with?
    17. What do you think of my taste in music?
    18. Describe my journal with one positive adjective:
    19. Describe my journal with one negative adjective:
    20. If my age is listed do you think I act it, or do I act more mature or immature? (i'm 16)
    * * *
    * * *

    Previous