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Courtney

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June 26th, 2008

ow

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I have the worst headache, I feel like my head is going to EXPLODE. I can't even think. 2 days back at work. Tattoo tomorrow I hope

June 21st, 2008

Never again...

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.....Will I do shrooms. Today I was very nervous about doing them, jut because of this in the first place. I worried all day, but I relaxed and tried to put myself in a good place so it wouldn't be bad. Finally after I took them, I felt sick, nauseous. I threw up once. I felt better. The whole time all I could think about was how I imminently was going to be sick, I was paniking. So I told myself, it's going to be okay, and other reassuring phrases to feel better. Until just now at 12:12 am I am eating again, feeling somewhat normal. (I ate them at about 7:30p.m. )

I never had crazy hallucinations or anything, that would even make it worth it. But i did light some colored sparklers, the ones that have pink paper wrapped around them, and they looked amazing. So many colors. The sky tonight was also beautiful, blue, pink, purple. So many colors. That was my most memorable part of the night.

June 20th, 2008

(no subject)

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Dear God, be good to me.
The sea is so wide and my boat is so small

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The Breton Fisherman's Prayer

June 19th, 2008

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I wish I wrote in this a lot but I don't. I will start again. I might as well, the way this summer is going I will be sitting home alone a lot with plenty of time to update. I work again Monday at Riverside. I can't wait, I wish I could work all week, just to catch up on money. I'm so broke it's almost a little painful. Someone stole 65 dollars out of my wallet. I don't even have a clue who did it, but I hope they are happy that they took the last money I had.

This summer was supposed to be so exciting. I'm so disappointed that it is just a letdown. I want to try to keep my head up so I don't wallow in my own trouble all day. Going back to school will be nice. I love the comforts of home and the relaxation, but I miss my friends. I can't wait to move in to the house. I hope to make more friends with the girls that live there, even though that house has already given me so many friends.

I wish I was having as much fun as last year. It seems like since I was away for a whole year everyone kind of forgot about me. Which is understandable really, I don't expect everyone to miss me and attack me with love. I just kind of wish they would want to hang out with me. Oh well, keep your head up champ! Although, I do with Blake would want to hang out with me more. I don't understand why he has come to think I am the most boring person in the world. I still think he's interesting! I think it is just because I am constantly sick, and I constantly just want to be close to home, even when I feel decent, because I constantly worry that I will get sick again. I just want to be normal.


Here are a few pictures for inspiration. One being Delta Zeta house that I will live in next year. And a few recent pictures of myself. This journal needs something new.


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June 28th, 2006

(no subject)

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i want you to post anything you want.
a story, a secret, a confession, a fear, a love, anything.
make sure you post anonymously.


i want lots, and lots of comments. i want to make this into a project, and probably display it.


i know stuff like this has been done before, and it has been very sucessful. But, i don't want people to send me pictures and post cards.i just want people to post a secret, and i'll do the rest. Just looking for something I need for a class.
thank-you.

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july 6th
EDIT////: thank-you for everyone who has replied so far, i love reading all the secrets! keep it up, and spread the word!




questions?
e-mail me at..

xxgoodbyexgirlxx@yahoo.com
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